


Supernova

by Alexia_Imriel_Courcel



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars The Force Awakens, star wars the last jedi
Genre: Alien Culture, Blood Drinking, Blood Kink, Blood and Torture, Blood and Violence, Conditioning, Drug Use, Drug-Induced Sex, Drugs, F/M, First Order, Force-Sensitive Reader, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Interrogation, Jedi, Medical Torture, Mind Control, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Mind Games, Mind Rape, Nipple Torture, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Physical Abuse, Prison, Prisoner of War, Psychological Torture, Rape/Non-con Elements, Reconditioning, Resistance, Sexual Torture, Sith, Spies, Torture, Undercover
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2019-07-23 08:07:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 96,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16155020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexia_Imriel_Courcel/pseuds/Alexia_Imriel_Courcel
Summary: "If I cannot move Heaven, then I will raise Hell"All things are seldom what they seem, and often the greatest wisdom is seeing through those appearancesAn old work I removed because of issues and other stuff, then re assessed to repost.  As usual it isn't pleasant in places and I haven't properly tagged it yet.  I will repost chapters as I edit them and tag as I go.  It seems the Last Jedi has helped iron out problems with the last attempt at it.





	1. Recon

It had been standard procedure to have your mind wiped prior to the mission.  You were not to be made aware of any details of the information being handed over. It was a protocol deemed safer by your Resistance superiors.  That way should anything go wrong and you be caught, it was even simpler than having to destroy the evidence.  You could be questioned, even mind probed by the infamous Kylo Ren they still would be able to gain any intel from you.  You wouldn’t even know how the information was stored within the data chip you had been given to carry.  It would make a dangerous mission, simple enough to complete that even the most complex of intel could be given over to you.  Admittedly conducting this transaction on Coruscant was a huge risk to you.  Worse still given your client. 

Since the destruction of the Hosnian System and the supposed end of the Resistance, the First Order where everywhere; running every major planet.  You would have thought that with the destruction of Starkiller and the end of Snoke, they would have been turning running with their tails between their legs; or at least on guard.  But no, it seemed the organisation was larger than anyone could have guessed, their bases scattered everywhere across the galaxy.

You scanned the room.  The cheap, gaudy outfit you wore to fit in was adding to your discomfort, but you knew better than to let that show.  You had to at least look like you belonged amongst the other scantily clad party goers.  Standing with confidence and pretending that the revealing fabric, did not make you brutally aware of how little protection you wore, should things go awry. 

You had nothing but a description of the person you were to meet; and they were late.  But you knew that must not make you any less nervous.  Still this was your first mission, and you were that frightened that you would get it wrong.   You sipped repeatedly at your drink.  Aware that whilst you must appear tipsy; you mustn’t actually get drunk.  But they were late not just by a handful of minutes; but by hours.  Now with no way of contacting your superiors, you could not ask for advice.  You had no choice but to wait, hoping all was still okay whilst avoiding possible detection.

Across the room a pale, dark haired man kept on watching you over the rim of his drink; and you tried avoiding eye contact with him.  Moving to another part of the room to lean over a metal railing and pretend to watch the dancefloor.  Something about him was off, and you needed to discourage him from talking to you.  He was a creep and it was imperative you didn’t mess this mission up.  

“Hi.”

The voice in your ear made you jump so violently, that you spilled your drink down your dress.  Great it hadn’t worked; and now your dress was translucent in places.  Un perturbed, he leaned nonchalantly against the railing, flashing you a shark’s grin full of teeth and winking.  You rolled your eyes at him turning the other way to walk off.  Only for him to ignore the message and follow you, his gait slightly off. 

You suspected he was quite drunk; which was just what you didn’t need. Some drunkard attracting the attention of others and making you miss your contact.  Ignoring the idiot; you did your best to lose him in the crowd on your way to the bar.  Failing miserably as he assumed the same cocky poise, leering down at you as you tried ordering a drink.

“So I said Hi.”

The urge to punch him was difficult to ignore the more he looked down your top.  He just was so nauseatingly full of himself that he refused to get the hint that you wanted him gone.  So much that you refused to look at him.

“I’m with someone.”

You kept your reply succinct letting the words ‘sod off’ fall unsaid; but definitely meant, as you ordered another drink to replace the other one you had spilt down yourself.  Handing the barkeeper credits for the drink.  Cross when the man trying to chat you up, pushed your money aside.  Adding his own drink to the order, before handing over a pile of credits. 

You hurried to take the drink.  Intending to try and lose him and it again in the crowd, walking away until he caught your waist.  Gently; but firmly pulling you back to him.

“I just bought you a drink.”

Shrugging his arms off your waist, you glared at him. Gobsmacked that anyone really thought themselves that entitled.  You hadn’t asked for the drink and even if you had, that didn’t give him a right to your time; or anything else he wanted from you.  You weren’t some prostitute, you’d not asked him to buy you one and even if you had of you had every right to walk away when you wanted to.

“And I told you I was with someone.”

“I don’t see anyone with you.”

He was persistent and also a little intimidating, but there was security. You’d figured by now, that he was your average drunk; harmless enough if you could just manage to loose him.  You looked for another path to make your escape and decided on a different tact.  Noticing a messy haired, unshaven redhead man approach the bar, you decided to take your chances on him.  He was attractive enough and you hoped he’d take pity on you for a little while.

“Oh look he’s here now, thank you for the drink goodbye.”

It was a huge gamble, but you took your leave of the man.  Strolling over to the redhead and smiling  as you spoke a loud greeting.  Reaching up to stand on tip toes, to reach his cheek with your lips, hoping he didn’t look too shocked as you spoke desperately in his ear.

“Please, please play along.”

To his credit he was unphased and didn’t bat an eyelid.  Instead looking straight over at the other man, frowning as he put his arm around your waist leading you off to a secluded booth, helping you down to your seat before sitting close to you.

“Thank you I never thought I would lose him.”

Whomever the man was; he was hot.  An elegance despite his messy hair that made you realise you had picked a winner; you just wished that this really had been a social event.  He snuck a look back over to the man at the bar his lips twitching briefly in a smirk before returning his gaze to you. 

“Glad to be of service to such an attractive young lady, has he been an overly large annoyance to you?”

You shook your head and took a sip from your drink.  Cradling it in your hands as you shot the redhead a genuine smile.  Grateful for his assistance and flattered by his complement.  Another time and you would have liked to get to know him better. His manners seemed impeccable so gentlemanly and a little out of place here that it brought with it some annoyance that you did not have time to know him better.

“No, no he’s just drunk I think, but he’s rather annoying and very persistent.”

“Yes, he is, isn’t he?”

His reply made you frown, though you were not overly worried; perhaps he came here often.  Clearly, he knew the dark-haired man; and from the tone he sounded as unimpressed as you were with him.  You made a noncommittal noise at his quip.  Not really wanting to encourage a discussion on the man but not wanting to appear rude either.  The redhead didn’t elaborate instead turning instead to look back over the way you had come.  The darker haired man was heading your way carefully balancing three shots.  He placed them on the table, sliding one in front of yourself the other to the redhead who took it raising an eyebrow to the brunette.  Scowling as he lifted the class to sniff at the contents, his tone neutral as he held it between his thumb and prominent two fingers.

“I take it there is a reason for the shots?”  

“Yes there is; we appear to be celebrating.”

Satisfied with other man’s answer the redhead raised his shot to his lips, gesturing with his spare hand towards the shot you had been given.  You took it from the table.  Not wanting to appear out of place or rude.  Smiling weakly as you raised it first in a salute to the others, before downing your shot.  Coughing at the bitter taste and burn of cheap spirits.  Wheezing a breath, before asking the darker man what exactly he was celebrating.  The redhead too repeating the question to him with a lilted amusement to his tone; this time using the brunettes name and smirking as he did.

“Yes Ren what exactly are we celebrating?”

Your blood turned to ice in your veins and the room began to sway slightly at the edges.  Dread at your own stupidity making your stomach flip, as the realisation dawned on you.  No one had ever shown you unmasked pictures of Kylo Ren, but they had General Hux; and this guy at least ticked some boxes there.  The man whom you had picked to as you would be saviour had suddenly developed a very thick Coruscanti accent.  His features less dissimilar and welcoming to you now.  Could you save things; did they know who you were, what you were doing here? 

“Your good fortune General.  It appears you have managed to locate the Resistance Dispatcher.”

You lunged for the data chip you had been given to carry the intel, desperate to destroy it before that information to could fall into enemy hands.  But they were quicker.  Both of them jumping you at once.  The man you now knew as Kylo Ren pinning your wrists as the man he had called General, prized the chip from you.  Smirking as he held it triumphantly pinched between two fingers.  Dispassionately watching you, as you started to realise you were feeling drowsy.  The room spinning slightly and panicking you until you realised you could hardly breathe.  Your vision faded into black and spinning to nothing.  Giving you just enough time before you collapsed, to realise that the shot had been drugged.  

Everything seemed unreal.  The world around you too hazy and fake as you faded in and out of consciousness.  An unnatural brightness tinging your peripheral vision and making you briefly aware of figures and changing scenery flitting in and out of focus.  Groaning to yourself, as you were carried somewhere dark and cold; panic making you restless.  You would have fought to escape but your muscles were unresponsive as you screamed at yourself to run; to get away.  For all this felt unreal, it was terrifyingly anything but. 

 

You eventually you were able to break through the drowsy fog to awaken.  Your thoughts groggy and your head thudding.  You were unable to place your surroundings; nor remember why you were here.  Amnesia from whatever substance had been placed in the drink, making your body slow to respond.  You tried shakily to stand up.  Realising quickly that you were unable to do so.  Your arms and legs strapped to some sort of bench or table. 

A chuckle broke out from the darkened corners of the room.  Making you shudder at the unpleasant interloper residing somewhere; hiding himself somewhere in the gloom.

“To think you thought yourself safer under the protection of General Hux.  Better that you would have chosen me sweetheart, I prefer my prey less bloody.”

The inhuman voice came from the darkness.  Stamping footsteps echoing, someone stepping slowly into the harsh circle of light, that cast a pale illumination on you from above.  The shadowy apprehension slowly taking the form of a tall masked figure. A titan clothed in flowing, black robes; his mask making him unmistakably this time, Kylo Ren. 

Memories came back to you.  Now you remembered the cantina, you remembered him, the General; everything.  Quickly you recalled your interrogation training.  Nerves making you to eager to speak, blurting out your line without even having a question to answer.

“Private, 22758”

A brush of static broke from the mouth piece of his mask.  The vocoder distorting the laugh he gave to your show of bravery as he approached closer.  Making you quickly realise that he was not the only one in the room with you.  The first laugh had been too unmistakably human, unhindered by any apparatus; there was no way it had been Kylo Ren. 

As though to clarify your frantic thoughts, fresh footsteps sounded from the edges of the room.  These less thundering, lighter in their tempo.  The owner of them never braking into the light, as they beat a steady rhythm into the floor around you.  Stalking you as the monster behind the mask continued to taunt you.

“Were you aware you carried a decoy message, that your purpose all along was to be sacrificed?”

You smirked.  He was trying to provoke you; to play with your fears and make you less resilient to spilling whatever secrets you carried.  But no dispatch messenger was ever told what they were carrying; nor given the means of finding out.  It was always a simple mission to find the contact and then hand over the consignment.  So, it made perfect sense to send several blank messages out.  To increase the likelihood of the message getting through.  It was a tactic used often; so it did not surprise you to discover that. 

Your reply was stoic the simple rhyme you had been instructed to repeat during your basic training; this time adding your name first. Reinforced by further instruction when you chose to join this branch of the Resistance Army.

“(--), Private, 22758”

You ensured your tone remained civil, neutral.  You knew not to bait your captors or goad them to any actions unless you could benefit from it.  You also knew that you had to strike a rapport with them, you had to appear human.   

Ren spoke again; and you knew even without the tone to his voice, he was amused at your predicament.  His head tiling towards you and chest heaving in a deep intake of breath.

“I can see you have received anti interrogation training, looks like we may dispense with the formalities of telling you how this will progress.  Unless of course you would like me to explain to you just how helpless you are.  How we will hurt you, break you?”

You were afraid, though you struggled to keep an appearance of calm.  That much was a given, your training had warned you what to expect. The simple advice you had been given at the beginning of the training sprung to mind about how to progress your fear.  Remembering that you can hold out longer under torture if you focus on what you will say rather than what you won’t.  Fixing your mind not on the misery of your failed mission and instead repeating your name, rank and serial number over and over in your head until you could think little more than that.  Your lips moving silently around the words as you did. 

“Enough! You know enough from your training then girl, to know I can simply take what I want”

Yes you did, you thought.  His question pulling your treacherous mind into a stream of unwanted cognitive thoughts; but what exactly did he want from you?  You of course knew nothing.  You had been unaware of anything; you did not even know the location of the new base.  Having not been in contact with any Resistance members since you had received your instructions.  The small package you carried arriving later by.  Just in case he could breach your mind, you tightened your wall and clamped down on that thought.  Quickly you repeated your mantra, this time speaking the words out loud, concentrating just on those words alone.

“(--), Private, 22758”

“So you did not receive the orders and package at the same time, how did the package arrive?”

You didn’t break off to acknowledge his question; it would go against your training.  Not willing to give him the satisfaction of breaking into another memory; and realising it was annoying him, you just kept up your chant.

“ (--), Private, 22758”

It went on and on.  More questions and always the same answer for you.  Your name, your rank and your serial number; they must be growing impatient by now.  A noise came again from the shadows, reminding you that you were not alone.  This time its owner chose to speak, each word correct; commanding and enunciated as though it disgusted him to speak to his accomplice.

“Enough Ren, you know what I want take it, take it.”

That was a familiar voice even in the darkness. The recognition, making you cringe at your stupidity; how had you not recognised him in the bar. 

Kylo Ren moved closer.  His arm raised; one colossal gloved hand outstretched towards you in an open claw.  Swallowing, you ignored the growing terror of failure.  Telling yourself that you knew what was coming; you had been trained to expect and fight it.  You could do this. 

Still the press of his mind against you was like that of a battering ram against a castle door.  The man showing no fineness; his attempts like a cat scratching to get into your mind; like nails trying to dig into your fragile skull. 

He could perhaps break through if given enough time; but you knew you had to hold fast.  You could keep the mind block in place and not give him that time.  You pictured the wall they had created for you, knowing that whilst you held on to that he couldn’t get through.  Unfortunately, it meant that he would now know that you were force sensitive.  But that meant nothing, he would not be able  to tell him that all Resistance Dispatchers were.  

You had to choose your moment to goad him to overstep carefully.  Ensuring that he had believed this task would be easy, by allowing him past more personal and less important memories.  Ones that were placed there to misdirect him until he found the block.  He was beginning to struggle by the time he had; the evidence clear by the way he no longer held his shoulders as straight.  His arm shaking and legs not as steady.  

It took you far less energy to maintain a shield, than it would him to tear it down; and you had been given practice at this.  Spending hours honing your skill as part of your training; practicing amongst your fellow dispatchers.  Still it did require strength to keep him out.  You wondered if sweat trickled as freely down his neck as it did yours in the frigid chamber, judging from his stance, you knew he couldn’t be far from exhaustion.  You took a gamble as his neck sagged lower the hiss of his breath strong and fast through his distorter.

It was time you gave your final taunt at his failure.  Laughing wildly as you did, all sense gone as you signed not your execution order, but that of the commencement of more physical torture.  More painful; but safer to the secrets you carried than this mind rape.  You knew that the man who would lead this was more precise; less prone to emotional out bursts than Kylo Ren you screamed out your final challenge.

“ (--), PRIVATE, 22758 AND I WILL TELL YOU NOTHING!”

There was a moment of silence broken only by the sound of heavy breathing as your chest rose and fell to the same velocity as the rhythmical splinter of breath from the Commanders mask.  Commander of what you thought sneering and deliberately not blocking this thought.  Allowing him to see if he wished, the weak and humiliating form he made struggling at your feet.  

A pale wraith took ghostly form as it stepped slowly and precisely from the shadows.  Circling slowly to observe your prone form as he approached.  His face appeared repulsed by you, as he ran his eyes over your bedraggled form.  Making you oddly feel ashamed for him to see you so badly dress, whilst his appearance was so impeccably untarnished. 

He reached closer, stopping behind your line of vision silently observing you before leaning closer his perfect accent in your ear as he spoke.  Shivers running your spine as his breath hit the crook of your neck.

“I had a fancy Ren would struggle to break you, shall we see if I can do better?”

Your eyes bulged as on an unspoken command a second smaller light illuminated a table to your left.  The surface glittering with assorted instruments; his chosen tools of interrogation.  You gulped, trying to steady your breathing whilst you took stock of the items on the table.  Knowing that anticipating pain was like experiencing it twice; but made desperate by your fear to know what may or may not happen to you. 

His eyes lit with an animated fire as he stepped to the side.  His fingers dancing over instruments, drawing your attention to them. His precise behaviour indicating that he already knew which items were best suited to torment you, before he had even notified you of his presence in the room. 

Choosing one, he brought it towards you.  Twirling the blade between hooked fingers as he lowered it to your exposed clavicle.  His tone almost bored as he gave you your ultimatum; your only way out.

 

“Any time you wish to stop all you must do is say ‘please General Hux I am ready to talk’.  Now the let us remove you of that dress.  It hardly is fitting; so revealing, so cheap, hardy the outfit of a respected soldier is it now?”

He pressed the knife firmer to your skin.  Careful to leave a shallow nick behind it as he tilted it under your dress, hooking the gauzy fabric with it.  Watching for your reaction as it ripped the fabric apart.  The sharp blade guided down to your skirt hem, separating your dress in half.  Loudly tutting at the sight of your lace bra and pants.

“Look Ren, you could be wrong, are you sure she isn’t really a whore? She looks more that part than the dispatcher we where sent for.”  

His words were meant to rile you to remind you that you were a defenceless woman, restrained in the company of two very dangerous men.  It was a tactic you had been warned would be used against you because you were female.  You knew that sexual torture had always been a possibility; you had always warned that it would be the most effective measure against most women.  Time after time you had all been advised to rid yourself of that fear.  Reasoning with each of you that it would make you more aware of what to expect when the time came; even going as far as to suggest they ran through some practices.  But the videos your instructors showed hadn’t helped making you dread the act more.  The screams of women and men as they were forced, making you wonder why anyone could stoop so low as to willingly partake in providing that torture.

Your mission had required total authenticity.  They had thought of everything, ensuring each detail, even down to your undergarments was authentic for a woman out for a good time. Now as he ran the back of the blade over the swell of your breasts, you wished that they hadn’t been so meticulous. Cringing at the choice, whilst still trying to reason with yourself that your choice of underwear wouldn’t have mattered.  He would have found another reason to comment to belittle you, this was polite chit-chat for what was to come later. 

It wasn’t a question yet as the General returned the knife to the table your fear increased as he returned this time a syringe in his hand, filled with a creamy white substance that you recognised.  You’d had that one used in training and you’d hated how out of control that drug had made you whilst under the care of your superiors; under these two it would make you feel tenfold as vulnerable. Your words were desperate despite the lack of an actual plea not to do this.  Choking on your fear, as you swallowed down your desire to beg. 

“(--), Private, 22758”

The redhead moved to stand in front of you, his steps slow and deliberate as always.  The syringe held aloft in a nonchalantly threatening manner; needle pointed upwards, the blade unprotected and sharp.

“I shan’t insult either one of our intelligences by telling you what is contained in the syringe.”

He stopped at your feet to let you study it a little longer, his cold blue eyes observing you before he stepped between your legs.  Cruelly pushing against the already splayed and fastened limbs to observe you.  Straining them painfully wide and pulling against the straps, before crouching between them.  His face a dull void of emotion until you took a deep shaky breath; his lips twitching in delight at the fear he was inflicting on you.   

“Shall we continue then?”

The harsh lighting was dull enough to make the shadows on his face run a dark contrast to the white of his skin.  His eyes unnaturally animated and alive as he ran the fingers of one hand languidly up the soft flesh of your inner thigh.  The tips of each soot-blackened glove, brushing lightly over your skin. Eyes narrowing as they followed the line.  Flicking over the expanse of defenceless skin until they reached higher, where blue veins criss-crossed the soft shield of flesh. 

The needle was pressed against you, biting into your skin.  The press of it, firm enough to break flesh; but barely enough to bleed.  Your skin marred as he left a raised mark in it’s wake, drawing lazy tram lines on you as he trailed it leisurely up your inner leg.  Bringing the point towards the marked spot of his waiting fingers.  Biting his lower lip in concentration as he reached the spot.  His index finger prodding softly to ensure you knew he had found his mark, as he dragged the syringe up to replace his finger. 

The needle pressed against the white spot left behind by his finger; and he adjusted it angle of the syringe.  Plunging the sharp point casually into your skin.  Wating a breath before withdrawing it. Leaving a single bead of ruby blood to mark what had been his target. 

Without asking his colleague held open your thighs for General Hux.  Making his access to your more intimate places easier as General Hux moved the needle up a fraction.  This time driving the tip further in than before and twisting it.  Dragging the sharp point against the underside of your epidermis as once again he withdrew it.  Only to move it again across your skin.  Repeating the action as he once more forced it to pierce the barrier of your skin.  Two tiny trickles of blood wept from the injury.  Irritating as they inched down your thigh, waiting to gather together in droplets to fall to the floor.  

Tutting, General Hux put the needle once more into your skin.  Humming in mock concern as his thumb smeared the blood over your thighs and he played more with the dulling needle.  His digits moving to the puncture wound.  Ready to smear the blood into painted whorls, adding to the artwork already there; mixing it with the rest of the crimson painted across your thigh.

“Comfortable?”

He flicked his eyes back to you to observe the effect his toying was having, he knew this was far from your breaking point.  But Hux was a master at this game, he knew he would have to warm your body up.  To make it receptive to the pain that was to come later was only half the job he needed you afraid too. Your mistake was to look at the visor of the man who held you open, the face of that mask firmly turned to the gap between your legs watching the other man as he worked.  A fleshy wetness was placed against your thigh making you snap your gaze back to the General as he ran his tongue over you. Searching the blood on your thigh, the tip of it tasting your skin for the unmistakeable changes in taste, that would let him know he had reached the broken flesh of needle sites.  You shuddered to have his mouth on you.  To close to that of your most intimate areas, his nose brushing lightly the edges of your panties as he moved upwards finding what he wanted.  He brought his teeth with out preamble firmly over the proposed injection site painfully clamping over it.  Eventually making you scream out in pain as it broke the skin, your back arching as you viciously kicked against your restraints.  Your struggles would get you nowhere, you knew your bonds were too tight.  Kylo had been ready for you to react dug his large digits painfully into your thigh as he held it still for his General.  His teeth had left a series of brakes and bruises to your already sensitive skin.  Sexual as it had seemed it wasn’t it was an act that would make the next injection painful as the needle broke though the brushed flesh the broken capillaries.  General Hux lifted his head tilting back so you could see the sanguine paint dyeing his swollen bottom lip, making him look almost vampiric as it contrasted with is ghostly white skin.  He knew without force sensitivity what you where feeling.  The needle came down again this time thrusting it straight into your femoral artery his icy orbs on yours as the chose to watch the realisation on your face as the liquid was ejected straight into your bloodstream.  It burnt at the injection site and the man made sure to deposit the fiery liquid slowly, prolonging both the pain and the mental torture of having an unwanted substance forced into you.  The syringe empty he withdrew it placing it into a waiting kidney bowl waiting for it to take full effect.

 

You could feel it coursing through your veins, every heart beat sending it further into your nervous system until finally your head lolled back on your shoulders. You knew your eyes where glazing over in the tell tail sign that the drug was fully antiquated with your system, you felt relaxed, giddy, slightly sick. The redhead stood back hands placed behind his back, waiting patiently as Ren stroked your face his fingers a parody of affection as he trailed them into your hair.   How he had regrouped his strength so quickly you did not know, but he began once more the assault on your mind this time avoiding the walled up parts of it dragging forth earlier memories much more precious and personal to you.  Talons dug roughly through your skull, never settling on any particular memory simply rifling through them like a deck of cards, plucking briefly to gather together the ones he showed interest in before withdrawing from your mind.

 

The drug had always made it easier to access your personal memories, relaxing you enough to let him flit past your personal barriers, but you knew the ones that were most damaging were too protected even in this state.  Your instructors having tested the blockade with far stronger force users than him.  You felt the vibrations of his mask as he made sure to push the snout uncomfortably close to mockingly let you know he had gathered useful information.

 

“So you are possibly force sensitive, I wonder if others of your ilk are? And they took time to test your walls to thoroughly, they were not weak like you, there was a Jedi too how interesting.  They would be far more useful here than you with your petty grasp of a simple parlour trick.”

 

The drug was up to it’s full effect now and you held him out of what you could, despite him reaching more personal memories as he picked through those that would hurt the most.

 

“No mother, no father but ah, you had an elder brother, yes I can remember him it was my sabre that ran him through wasn’t it? As your parents died ensuring you escaped the temple.”

 

You had been so young, too young to have witnessed the butchery you now recalled the memory so horrific they hadn’t even bothered to block it like the others as you had begged them not to look there not to drag forth the horror.  They had accented to your request kindly remarking that this memory wasn’t relevant it had only been half the reason for you joining the resistance, the other thankfully locked away but not your primary concern.  He went again this time deeper chasing that memory.  But you had requested stronger safe guards against that one, prepared to risk even death to protect it.  The room spun darkness splattering the edges of your vision as you faded from consciousness, the last thoughts clear enough; though you could not recall where they came from.

"Deception is a tactic: use it.  Do whatever it takes to win." 


	2. Surveillance

It was dark; and the smell of damp fabric flooded your nostrils; the edges of your tongue tasting the damp cloth. Somehow, despite your advanced interrogation training, you couldn’t seem to remember how to breathe; not under duress such as this.  The false sensation that you where drowning flooding your adrenaline drives and blocking out all reason. You knew full well that you weren’t being held under water; you had practiced holding out under such crude methods of torture as waterboarding. But even knowing that they wouldn’t kill you; and that there was the available oxygen, you couldn’t get your body to allow you to control it. Your lungs burned for air, your throat was beyond sore.  Not from screaming, you were at least still in control of your vocal chords.  But your body tried again and again to uselessly cough up the imaginary water in them, each barked splutter leaving it hoarse.

Today you were as you had always been in the same chamber as the first torture.  Icy-cold metal bands keeping you firmly restrained to the same filthy interrogation table as before.  Apparatus straps held you tight, but still your already sore limbs made it worse, rubbing and jerking as you did your best to wrench yourself free from escapable bonds.  The repeated water torture overcoming your common sense, making your exhausted body struggle desperately to convince you to at least try and break free.

You had expected to have no concept of how long you had been interred for; but planning had not made it any easier.  Time in general no longer had any meaning to you; a tactic you had thought you had trained for; but clearly not enough to leave you with control.  There was no discernible pattern to the time spent between your holding cell and the torture room.  Often it would seem like forever before the faceless Stormtroopers came for you, dragging you from your tiny cell to take you for another round of torture. Other times only moments seemed to have elapsed.  The stings of Hux’s last masochistic torture not even settled into dull throbs, before they would blind fold you and pull you back to the interrogation table.  Food too was used the same way.  Very occasionally they would provide you with several meals of the same grey, foul tasting gruel.  Offering you it in a way that left you with no time to work out a pattern to the meals.  Sometimes lots together that you struggled to stomach; other times they left you for days without food and water until you couldn’t get it down quickly enough. The food was not adequate to do more than keep you alive.  Purposely making you feel sick and weak.  Dizzying whilst they still pumped more drugs around your system.

In however long you had been here, the one thing you had purposefully lost count of, was the sheer number of drugs General Hux had injected into you.  His mouth pulling into the evilest of grins as he tried a new one on you. His reactions letting on which were a triumph and which did not have you behave as he had needed you to.  Of course, they were a choice, not a necessity.  It seemed the General was quite fond of drugs.  Unlike Kylo Ren’s failed attempts; General Hux excelled at torture and he appeared to enjoy this too much, to have not taken more than a glancing interest in the development of the chemicals.  The physical skills that went with it too where well honed; precise almost to the point of rehearsal, to how he interrogated you.  There seemed to have come a point in the drug selections, that Hux had stopped asking questions from you.  But there had to be information he was gathering, for him to have chosen to continue the torture sessions. In the few conscious moments alone in your cell, you had wondered if it was to keep you unaware of exactly what was useful. That they both watched for your reactions, and if needed Kylo Ren passed any information needed over to Hux. After all, why else was the man present for the sessions; his mask firmly trained on you, whilst taking orders from the Ginger.  You could sense discord when they discussed you, but during the act of torture, Hux was firmly in charge.  Kylo Ren simply watching you; and never touching you anywhere.  Not else unless he was expressly ordered to do so by Hux.

What was he the man’s bitch?  Unbidden an image of the General taking Ren as just that, ass up and face down as his bitch flittered briefly across your brain. Making you give into delirium and giggle raucously. Your water-soaked splutters turning to a full-blown laugh that irritated your already sore ribs and cracked lips. The bones were probably broken too, and you couldn’t draw a full breath without wheezing.  The pain making you not all that sure it was that funny; but you were unable to stop yourself laughing even with the agonising pain. Where you finally losing it; was this their intended goal for you?

Unable to stop yourself, you deepened your laugh.  Still not able to stop, even after a barked order to do so. Even after being side swiped by the General, hard enough to split your lip, teeth cutting into your cheek, the taste of iron flooding your mouth.  Defiant as always, you refused to let it go, hawking it in to spit pink tinged saliva at the General, pleased to see it hit your mark.  Laughing again as he scowled, almost animalistic in eis snarl as your fluid dripped down his cheek. Splattering in a messy trail to sully his jacket, his usual pristine appearance tarnished.  The sudden twist to his mouth the only waring before he hit you again; this time knocking you into unconsciousness.

Another day; fetched with it another round of torture.  This time electrotherapy, the shocks applied to random bodily parts of Hux’s choosing.  Always somewhere new, he knew better than to let the pain of the last shock, numb the sharpness of the new.  A true strategist; he was by the very definition a master of torture; he seemed to know where to press. What pains would hurt you the most.  Not that there was anywhere left that didn’t hurt. You doubted that if you had the guts to look; you would be able to find a patch of skin unmarred by his actions. 

Behind you, Ren was as always present with you in the interrogation chamber.  For this round of torture, his hands were at your temples.  The steady pressure in the base of your spine reminding you he was searching through the thoughts you had not blocked him from, for a way into the message you carried.  

 “We do not require you to talk for this.”

Ren didn’t usually choose to speak during these sessions with you either; however, today it seemed was to be different; he wanted to taunt you too.  The modulated voice hiding the tone from you, the toneless, inhuman voice so easy to discern from the human, but harshly clipped syllables of General Hux.  The mask filtering all humanity for him; unlike Hux who had chosen just to become inhuman by his actions alone.

Something of Ren’s comment, had amused General Hux, the redhead accompanying Ren’s statement with a chuckle. The oddly human action making you shiver at how macabrely he chose to use it against you.  No, you didn’t, you thought hard at Ren, letting him know you too could see what they were doing.  Instead Hux was going to have him feed you back the information, gleaning over what he had gathered from residing in your mind, feeding on your knowledge like some bloodsucking parasite.  Knowledge that you would manipulate him into searching for.  

This session was, just like the others over once you were that unresponsive that you could no longer even gasp at the pain.  Hux stepping from your and washing the dirt of the session, from gloved hands with a medical precise cleanliness.  Crisply using a coms device to demand your removal from him, since it was probably beneath him to be around you too long; you might risk getting his pristine uniform dirty.  Refusing to even look back at the mess he had made; he never liking to touch you once you had reached the end of a session. Grimacing at the noisy Stormtroopers as they pulled you (if you were lucky) to your feet and dragged you back to your cell.

The Stormtroopers never were gentle whilst they unstrapped you from the chair, but they seemed less cruel whilst in General Hux’s presence.  Dragging you back to toss you to the floor of your cell; leaving you there to rot until they would come for you again at some undeterminable time.  Sinking your head onto your arms, refusing to spend the energy needed to crawl onto the cold metal shelf that served as your bed.

You didn’t feel like you had slept, before it they arrived to take you back to General Hux. Always in two’s, one of the escorting Stormtroopers dragging you from your cell and literally kicking you awake from your few precious moments of sleep. You were never allowed to sleep for too long; even when not being tortured by Hux, the Troopers had their very own torture schedule for you. White armoured faces, taking it in turns to wake you with varying degrees of cruelty.  Not even the ones you suspected were female, showed you any human decency.  Never even allowing you to take care of your absolutions alone, always mocking always cruel.  

First you were dragged from your cell and into a blindingly-white tiled room. The binders you wore at all times when out of Hux’s supervision, fastened to a hook in the ceiling.  Deliberately set too high to make you stand precariously on tiptoe whilst they cut the soiled clothing from you off (it was never any good to wear twice); hosing you down like an animal. The pressured hoses making it difficult to keep your balance, not bothering to dry you off, before helping you to dress.  Always the same clothing, a thin grey tunic, (and if you were lucky) knicker-like pants; never the trousers you had glimpses of other prisoners wearing.  Everything drawn back to General Hux’s original taunts, building upon layers upon layers of cruelty, until you were almost docile.   

You wouldn’t call it clothing you realised early on.  Clothing was meant to cover you and to keep you warm.  Not to leave you further reminder of how exposed and vulnerable you were.  The top was shorter than the dress you had worn for your mission, and you always had to be helped into the pants that went with it.  It covered you; but allowed the General easy access to your skin.  Keeping you on edge as the troopers kept your wrists shackled firmly out of the way; probably so they could freely grope you.  Their actions reminding you of General Hux’s taunt that you perhaps were a whore. 

Once covered, they wrapped a heavy blindfold around your eyes.  Holding tightly to your upper arm as you padded bare footed along the corridors.  Making sure to dig the armour on their gauntlets into the fleshy undersides like talons on a claw whilst you did your best to work out today’s course.  Knowing full well, that they wouldn’t bother to warn you of any changes in your surroundings.  Changing corners quickly to scare you; as they practically dragged you bare footed, over painfully textured floors.  Leaving you disorientated as you walked; jeers and laughter supporting every stumble or when knocked yourself on anything. It was falling most of all that you dreaded; not from the pain, but the humiliation.  You knew if you fell the clothing would give no protection at all; as it was the pants rode up the crack of your ass if they made you hurry.  

Small mercies were to be had though; the escorting Stormtroopers would stop anything they deemed too risky to their underlings. Doubtless aware that General Hux would only allow this to go so far without his permission; but ensuring that everyone had their fun at your expense.  It would never do for them to over step their authority with his special prisoner.

A wolf-whistle sounded in an oddly unusual warning, before today’s round stared and you almost didn’t jump at the first touch.  The continued pace making you stumble whilst from somewhere behind you, a hand quickly grabbed your behind. Its owner slipping it momentarily between your thighs and over your clothed sex. This time making you fall over in your effort to escape it; a touch which up until now you had avoided.

Of course, more laughter broke out at your discomfort and one side of the pants rode up the crack of your ass. Someone making sure to pull the other side to join, it both cheeks now on display and quickly slapped, the dress ridden high on your bottom for all to see.  You scrambled to your feet quickly, turning blindly to confront whomever it had been, whilst trying not to let your cheeks darken at their treatment.  Knowing it was unlikely to have been your escorts; they had already had their turn at humiliating you as you’d dressed. One going as far as to expose himself to you in your cell. Making sure you watched as he jerked himself off, onto the metal shelf you slept on; leaving the mess there to dry whilst you were away.

“Get a move on, resistance scum.”

The trooper now behind you, nudged your bare ass cheek with the barrel of his (thankfully cold) blaster.  Instructing you turn around, grabbing at your shoulder to push you into walking on.  You wished you could reach to straighten your clothing, but the binders kept your wrists firmly in front of you. The blindfold leaving you disorientated, and dependant on the good-will of your captors.

You were positioned once more on the interrogation table. The all too familiar mechanised voice of Kylo Ren dismissing the troopers; leaving you oddly relived to be with him.  The torture that was to come between you and the officers, somehow preferable to the animalistic ritual-humiliation of the soldiers. 

Without your vision you felt vulnerable, jumping when he pushed you back, flinching at every sound in the room. That voice letting you know he was here should you kick off as he changed your restraints over for the ones on the table.  Hands touched your bottom, and it took you a moment to realise he was covering you back up. Then the blindfold was yanked from you and you blinked at the familiar cell they had led you to.

“Commander Ren I do not recall giving you the permission to start without me.”

Even though he was here for you, Hux paid no real attention to you as he strode into the room.  Keeping his back to you as he walked over to a sideboard just out of your peripheral, making sure that you couldn’t see the equipment he had chosen for the session today.   The General turned around, passively looking you over like a prized how animal, the only acknowledgement that you were actually there in his presence. He studied your arms, deftly wiping iodine over the crook of your elbow and inserting a cannula into it with surgical precision. A line from it, attaching a saline medical bag to your skin.

“It would never do for you to pass out from dehydration would it? Not when we have such a packed schedule.”

He spoke patronizingly, you knew the fluids he now gave you were a necessity to prolong his treatment of you. You had not been given proper food or fluids for so long, that this put you at risk of dying with the information.  In answer you smirked, drawing on the dwindling reserves of strength to display far more fortitude than you felt.  You’d be dammed if you gave them the satisfaction of letting them know you were afraid of them though. The sarcasm clear and present as you picked your answer carefully to annoy him.  Flippantly dismissing the supposed hold, he had on you. 

“Yeah General, I’d hate to leave the party early.”

He sighed in annoyance to you, motioning for Ren to come closer, to assume his more frequently frequented position at your head.  His leather gloves pressed familiarly to your temples and you doubted that he would speak, but you couldn’t resist taunting him anyway.

“It won’t work? Tell me, does I make you angry Jedi killer that you can’t get at anything of worth; they did too good a job for you didn’t they. You’ll fail this too, just like you did on Starkiller. It’d be quicker to kill me, unless you want to let me go.”

There was no answer, but the fingers at you head dug harder, and you thought strongly at him how pleased you were to have riled him.  But it was Hux spoke, diverting your attention back to him, to remind you that he was master in here not Ren.

 “Oh, so no drugs today? Why, General, how kind of you.”

“Well if you do insist 22758.”

Hux smirked at you; the only warning. Then you couldn’t prevent the blood from draining from your face, as he inserted a syringe into the bag pressing down the plunger, this one clearly different as he continued his taunt.

“I would hate to have failed your expectations of me.”

The liquid in the saline bag slowly changed, to the exact same colour of the drug. Not even a dilute version of it; blue threads of it dipping and uncurling as it dropped lower to the bottom of the bag. You had of course, been given various mind-altering substances in your advanced interrogation training. The instructors had done their best to try and make you aware of each drug likely to be used by the First Order.  Testing to see how you would respond when given them.  But none of them had ever been that shade of blue. You could deal with pain, the drugs you disliked but knew what to expect; but this scared you. How were you to keep any measure of control over your body when you really had no idea what was to be pumped through your system.

“You will enjoy todays offering. It is something rather special 22758, we developed it especially with you in mind.”

The blue liquid had now mixed fully with the saline solution, and in barely concealed baited horror, you watched as it began its slow descent down the tubing towards your cannula.  The forced breach in your bodies defence system that meant you would have no choice; it already had access to your body. Drawing on the training you had had, you swallowed hard against your panic.  Closing your eyes and feeling for each tiny change; real or imaginary as it entered your body. The fear of not understanding the drugs end game, was making your skin prickly, your temperature rising, making you too hot even in this cold chamber.  Sick with the knowledge that what filtered into you now, put you completely at their cruel mercies.  Your head spun; and you closed your eyes breathing in deeply, preying you could keep it together; that you could fight what it was already doing to you body.  Ignoring the tingling of nerves it set off along every inch of your battered skin. 

You could do this you told yourself; almost believing you could; until a sudden intense pain shot along your side.  Both the surprise and the sudden sting making your eyes open to look back in barely supressed anger at the man who had caused it. General Hux’s face completely stoic, but something behind his cold blue of his eyes suggested that internally he was anything but unaffected by what he did to you.  And you swore from the slight flare of his nostrils as he breathed in deeply, that it was actual pleasure he derived from this.  In fact, the only time you had actually seen his face show any traces of animation was when he hurt you; when he could make you scream for him.  He had cut you with a scalpel you realised, as menacingly he twirled it between his fingers.  Drawing out his taunt before he pressed it to you again; this time to your hip.  Pressing deeper this time against the bony area; the screams beginning anew as he painted painful red lines into your skin.  Drawing it across already drug-sensitised nerve endings.  His eyes lit as your breathing deepened; the pain you still felt from the last session and the exhaustion.  You were not rested enough to stay silent, the shallow scratches sufficing today, too much and you would blackout. You would bleed, encouraged to do so when he pulled at the healing scratches; but not enough to do any real harm yet.

You had not spoken though, until the blade came close to your neck.  Not words as such; but a simple squeak as it ran shallowly over your jugular. Taking a moment to press in what you sensed to be honest indecision there, before he moved on, dipping it between the valley of your breasts. Slowly ripping the fabric apart with the sharps, creating an access your flesh to him; but choosing not to uncover the flesh beneath it yet.  Leaving the tunic still covering you as a last feint at preserving your modesty.  Letting you know that although he had not yet resorted to that level of torture, he still had that power over you should he choose to utilise it.  Nothing was beneath him in this chamber; and he knew you had realised that. Openly grinning as he pushed back the fabric guarding your breasts, making your face pale as the blood drained from it.  This was too much, too far for you not to lose yourself for a moment in blind panic. Quickly yelling; trying hard to hide how it upset you, with a ill planned taunt to the General.

“Getting a good look, pervert? Keep your hands off me, you fucking jackass!”

He bent to kiss your forehead, as he stoked your cheek.  A strangely tender move from the man who had just forced you to expose yourself to him.  Unlike the civilised show of torture, this move oddly genuine and kind.  Some thing of reluctance in the tempo of his breath before he spoke to you.

“Why? Do you plan on stopping me 22758?  Hush now, we both knew it would have come to this point unless eventually. Unless there is anything you would like to confide in me?”

Taking a moment, you made a mock show of thinking; pretending alongside Hux that you had the option, that either of you would bend.  But naturally choosing a smart ass comment rather than anything that might have helped you; your mouth clearly acting on its own agenda.

“Yeah, there is, go back to the hell-pit you spawned from, you fucking demon.”

His lip curled up in distain at you, his face dipping closer to your own and an icy snarl developing to his tone.  Genuine distaste evident as he held himself unnaturally ridged to you.

“This drug, this process is very different from before, and so I shall humour you this first time with a warning to mind your language 22758.”

You hawked up precious saliva, ready to waste it in a reply to him.  But Hux aware of what you were about to do to him, grabbed your jaw.  Digging his fingers into your cheek until it painfully popped your jaw open for him.  Keeping your mouth forced open, tilting it back, so a slow trail of his saliva could slide into your mouth.  The trail running down your tongue and making you want to gag.  Forcing your mouth closed to make you swallow it as it hit the back of your throat.  Taking the time to ensure it was back into alignment once he was done.  

“Spit at me once more 22758, and I swear I will piss in your mouth.”

There was honest and uncontrolled anger, the first you had seen in reaction to any of your behaviour. Shocked, you sucked in a breath.  Trying to cleanse the taste of his spit from your palate; trying not to dwell on the thoughts that his fluids had just invaded your body.  Forgetting in all of that, that you were uncovered until he returned his attention back to your breasts. Your nipples already tightening in the chilly air of the interrogation chamber.  Now they hardened to stiff peaks as Hux flicked his thumb back and forth roughly over one; pinching it between thumb and forefinger to test your response.

You let out a small moan as it tingled, shocking yourself, turning your cheeks red with the discomfort of your reaction.  Where the hell had that come from? Ren’s vocoder did little to hide his triumphant groan, and you tilted your head back to him his visor tilted to one side. Facing you, letting you know he too was watching your reaction.

“You have such sensitive nipples, shall I continue?”

You shook your head wildly from side to side; your fear taking over your usually cock-sure temperament.  Urgently trying to dispute Hux’s statement, whilst tears pricked at your eyes.  You refused to let them fall, blinking them back before they could though and bit your lip as Hux’s black glove tilted your face back to him.

“Why moan for me if you don’t like it 22758?”

You ignored him. The first sensible move you had made since capture, not prepared to answer when you knew he would just twist anything you chose to say.  He set his jaw, making an irrigated sound at your refusal to acknowledge his question.  Mouth twisting before twisting your nipple hard and pulling from your body when you still refused to acknowledge his question.  Digging sheathed nails into it and holding it until you cried out your answer.

“Because its cold!”

He let go, running his finger around the throbbing bud in a way that left your cheeks pink and your breathing heavy. Taunting you all the more.  

“Does the cold make you moan like that 22758?”

He grinned unpleasantly at you, nonchalantly flicking at the sore bud; whilst you held your tongue.  Unable to think of a coherent and intelligent excuse.  

“You didn’t answer me 22758,”

His finger and thumb moved once more to trap it, and you yelled out your hurried reply too late, as he pinched it once more. The humiliation of his touch more president a reason to answer him than the pain that followed.

“No, yes, please I don’t know, ouch, let go please!”

He held on.  Rolling the tender nub between his digits, this time you couldn’t hold back the tears; a single trickle that fell towards his hand.  Your chin still held firmly in place by a neck brace, tilted by his hand up, so he could watch your reaction.  You refusing to meet his gaze, looking past him, too ashamed at your reaction.

“It’s okay to admit you liked it 22758.  Such stimuli is normally considered quite pleasant.”

His tone was soft, a mockery of intimacy.  The cruelness shocking you back to your more defiant self and relighting the fire behind your temper. Lips pursed, and ready you stopped when he raised a single eyebrow at you. Yes, you thought he would carry out his threat and you swallowed choosing to navigate less defined waters and to yell lied protests at him instead.

“The fuck I did! You sick fucking bastard!”

Any animation that he had shown in the last few exchanges was gone.  Blankness setting over his face as he let go of your chin, staring in cold impassivity at you.  A bored neutral tone as he delivered his verdict on your behaviour.

“I warned you Private.”

His face oddly showed a moment of hesitation before his arm swung back.  His palm making you see nothing and then stars, as it connected with your cheek.  His face returned to calmness after his show of temper as he pressed into the spot with his thumb, watching as it rubbed into the into your darkening skin.  Seemingly satisfied with it, his thumb slid down your cheek, and odder still you found yourself transfixed by his action.  Then his eyes locked with yours, in a way that had you shivering. The room chilled to a dangerous cold as he ran his thumb softly under your bottom lip. Your mouth opening as he slipped it over your lower teeth and rubbing it over them and hooking your cheek, using it to manipulate your face to look at him.  

He watched as submissively you allowed him to touch him.  His pupils softening, as saliva pooled and instinctively you swallowed it; sucking on the digit, your tongue flicking across the leather pad.  Swallowing long before you realised what you had done; what you should have done instead.  He felt the movement of your jaw before you could complete your action, pulling the digit from your grip before you could close your teeth on it.  His head slightly tilted back at Ren, as though as he considered something as he flitted his eyes between you both.  Taking a moment before he swallowed; his voice honest.

“Is it working then?”

Hux’s voice was deeper and like his actions and questions it seemed slightly at odds with his usual certain demeanour.  Something vulnerable, something you needed to work out how to exploit.

“Yes, but it needs to be considerably stronger.”

Even through the vocoder on his mask you could hear the change in Kylo Ren’s voice as it dipped, to something you’d not yet heard. A different type of hunger; arousal, and yet not arousal; like a wold had for its prey.  You needed to know what was coming next, what they had planned for you. Stupidly you lost it and permitted your fear to wash over you thrashing wildly in the chair; desperately needing to know now what was in your system.  More so now than you needed to appear unafraid to them.  Stupidly giving them a reaction, a handle, letting them know you feared the unknown.  Fear really becoming the mind-killer.

“What needs to be stronger, what the fucking hell did you put in me this time?”

At the first raised hand to you, Hux’s threat to backhand you made you drop the attitude begging quickly. Humbly pleading for answers, no longer as self-assured as you had been before. 

“Please General, what is it?”

Hux looked almost pleased at your swift change of attitude; but he backhanded you anyway.  Hard enough to hurt, but not to knock you out again.  This time however, he dipped to gently kiss your stinging cheek, almost as though he would to sooth a child’s grazed knee. His lips moved to smile against your cheek, his voice soft but his words where just as taunting as before.

“It seems you have trouble shutting that filthy mouth of yours; so let me assist you. The gag please Ren.”

The taller man moved from behind you, stepping over you to force your mouth open making short work of your clenched jaw. Fighting with you, to slot the ball behind your teeth. Glee obvious despite the mask, as he fastened the gag in place behind your head.  Footsteps leading him back to his place at your head, this time stroking your forehead soothingly as the mask spluttered its breathing down at you.

Hux had returned to the steel table and drew up a fresh syringe.  It didn’t take so much as a glance at it, to work out that it was filled with more of the substance. Terrified you watched the General place the needle straight into the injector port of the cannula.  Ensuring his sigh heard by you, as he pulled back the plunger to mix it with your blood. Now you did beg, the shame you might have felt at breaking no longer mattering, as you realised what it was it in your system.  Your words muffled by the rubbed ball weighting down your tongue. Begging would be less shameful than what came next as Hux slowly released the tainted blood back into your system. Flushing the syringe afterwards, the saline ensuring the full dose would be delivered fast.  Quickly joining the heady dose of aphrodisiac already coursing your system.

This time Hux watched almost reverently, as the drug took hold.  Your pupils dilating almost black, your heart rate soared, your breathing quickened. You squirmed in the chair as wetness practically dripped from your sex.  Knowing that if your legs had of been free you would have been pressing them together in a desperate attempt at easing the pulse of your aching cunt.  It was the man behind you who let out a crude and triumphant groan, as your hot core clenched; and somehow you knew he felt it too. There was no hiding it now, for all you made no sounds; and Ren was gleefully as he passed it over to the General.

“She’d be willing General.”

The redhead raised a single eyebrow in answer in a scowl to Ren, who for let go his hold on your skull to clarify his meaning.  Perhaps from the scowl that twisted Hux’s mouth, explaining more than he needed to, to a man already aware. 

“It seems it’s not just the drugs, I’ve seen it she already enjoys a certain level of, control.”

Your head shook wildly from side to side; urgently trying to dispute Ren’s statement.  Too focused on delivering a clear message to Kylo Ren, that you forgot to watch the master of ceremonies.  

 _‘No, you know there’s more to it than that!’_  

You screamed more at him from within your mind; knowing he would hear it clearer than your words. That clench had been mainly caused by the fear of non-consent, not enjoyment of it.  You had no desire for anything either man did to be consensual, and he would do well to inform Hux that. 

 ** _‘_** _Is there?’_  

His tone was obvious in his disbelief of your protests of innocence. The evidence of shame coursing your face, at what you knew was only half a lie.  Him you would hate to touch, but internally you had never lost your curiosity at General Hux. An image coming to mind of what it would have been like to kiss him, to feel his lips move against yours.  In another life Hux would have been a preference you would have been taken with.

Hux once again held a blade, this time pressing it threateningly against the crotch of your knickers. You took a shaky breath to steady yourself. If you moved or so much as flinched, he didn’t care; he would cut you. The blade pressed firmly against the fabric, and Hux drove it down towards your ass creating a slit, the sound of ripping fabric unusually loud in the empty chamber.  Your throat getting tight at this final assault on your dignity.  He turned the blade over, using the flat of it to peel back one side of your now crotch less panties.  Then bent over to examine you, nudging the fabric with the sharps to gain a better view. Humming as though in thought as he did so.

“Such an odd response if your body is not willing 22758.”

He didn’t lie the drug was efficient enough, that in time you would be willing.  You gasped, when Hux harshly thrust two fingers inside you; the sudden intrusion stretching you without any warning.  Intently studying the mess you had made of them before lifting them up to display your glistening wetness to Ren. Studying the wet strands before speaking the mans’ name, the single “Ren” a question of sorts.

There was a hiss and a thud.  Ren placed his helmet onto the side table, and he walked around the table to Hux.  Making a show out of grasping the man’s wrist to angle it into the light, he frowned before pulling Hux’s fingers into his mouth and swallowed.  You watched as he sucked them clean; cheeks burning and stomach rolling as he did. This action far more upsetting to you than Hux’s fingers had been.  Two sets of eyes watching very intently for your reaction to the intrusion.  You know that without the drugs it wouldn’t have been able to affect you this way.  Your clit throbbing, you watched the mans’ full lips close over Hux’s fingers, sucking gently as he closed his eyes, humming at the taste of you; your mind revolted at it.

The General ran his hand back over your clothed sex, your eyes pleaded with him to stop, drool mixing with the angry tears slipping down your chin, adding to your humiliation. The gag was garbling your words, but you alternated, between begging him and throwing garbled insults at him.

“Remember what I told you 22758, just tell us clearly what we need to know and all of this will end.”

You gathered he was pleased with his jest. The smirk on his lips letting you know he wouldn’t recognise any actual attempt at agreeing to tell him. You tried zoning out, focusing on the feel of the pulse point in your arm instead, fixing your gaze on the ceiling. They wouldn’t allow that though. Ren tilted your head back to watch as Hux’s fingers moved back to slip between the hole in your knickers. You closed your eyes, refusing to look at them; you could not bear to be reminded who was doing this to you.  A thumb brushed your cheeks, gathering your tears, before smearing them across your nipples.  The wet providing lubrication for Ren’s fingers, to rub smoothly across then. There was a groan but you weren’t sure who from, as Hux withdrew his fingers from inside you.  You hadn’t realised he had put them there; but his time he coaxed your juices up towards your clit. 

Strangely it was Ren who offered you a real way out of this ordeal; he tried coaxing you, his voice strangely gentle without the vocoder.

“You don’t have to speak to tell me, just drop your walls show me, and it will all stop.”

You shook your head, forcing yourself to breathe evenly, as the fingers flicked your clit rubbing faster.  The tender bundle of nerves almost painful now with swelling. They were both experts at reading the signs, Ren from gathering internally what your own body was feeling, Hux reading your body language with the eyes of a master.  Hux deftly flicking and pinching over your sex, bringing you speedily towards completion, despite your reasoning to your body to stop.  Of course there had been no way of preparing your body, not to hold out against this kind of torture. Yet you had foolishly thought you would hold out better than this, even with drugs.

But Hux seemed to know exactly what he was doing. Your walls clenching for the last time, and Hux jerked his head at Ren, who yanked off your gag.  Ensuring you could be easily heard as you grit your teeth and grunted at your climax. They of course laughed at you as you came, adding further fuel to your humiliation.  Hux rubbing the wetness into your knickers, before cutting them off you handing them over to Ren.  Instructing the man to keep them as a “souvenir”.  Once done, dried his glove over your bare stomach.  Making sure to spread the evidence of your arousal, peeling off his glove to discard it on top of your abdomen.

They prepared to leave the room, leaving you still strapped, exposed, and unguarded on the table.  Ren tilting his head for one last look, Hux refusing to further acknowledge your presence.  His shoulders more rigid than was usual; even for him. Now you felt like cheap, used, garbage; everything they'd taunted you with.  Even going as far to label yourself a whore; knowing that had it been Hux alone you would have given in to any of his physical demands.

Either way it was irrelevant.  This was the safest moment to do it, whilst they thought your morale gone and defeated. They had gone now, and you could feel the removal of Kylo Ren’s attention on you, lost to revelling in their triumph at the change in your demeanour.  Yes, they’d seen you cry plenty before, but only from pain which you could tolerate. This was different, so much more invasive, but you needed to stay alive. You closed your eyes, willing your body to relax, clearing your mind as you briefly opened a chink in your mind; sending out a single blip.  A distinct heartbeat signature that would let her know you were still alive; that you at least had made it.

 


	3. Protocol One

Even with his mask on, you knew that Kylo Ren was furious, and unable to accept his own failure; you were to be his target.  The way he paced across the room to you put you in mind of a prowling Chlovi Cat sizing up its rival in battle. His body tense and ready to pounce as studied you intently. Almost winding back and forth like a serpent as he sauntered closer towards you.  His anger at failing, was driven mostly by fear so thick that you could almost taste your triumph at it.  Pure chaos; and that you benefited you.  Ren was unsure of exactly what he had in his hands; of the cost of what he had failed to prevent happening.  Now you played the risky game you were sent into play. 

He might now have found a way in; a way to control you; but in return you would he. 

You realized from wariness, that Hux had yet to learn of his failure.  That Hux did not comprehend how the Force worked enough, to realise that Ren was panicked by the sudden hole in your defences.  That he had not realised there was a way in, until it was too late for him. Your walls were lower now that they had ever been around Hux and that was deliberate; divide and conquer. 

Ren had chosen to cover his face all this time to hide; the painful failure of being human from the world.  You too had your own fears.  Unlike his though, yours was knowing that the cost too losing was too high.  Should this little game you had them play out for you fail; then torture and death would be a blessed relief.  But to save the Resistance, there was nothing you would not do. Nothing was too higher price to pay to fulfil your mission; even this distasteful manipulation of an innocent.  This would add another level to his failure.  You had accepted before the mission that this could go horribly wrong for you, especially should he anger too quickly; but it could go so well for you too. There were few enough options to be had here; and like this it would be harder.  But this was the first time you had him here with you alone.  No General Hux to hold back his leash, to control any sudden impulses; to guess what was happening. 

You first allowed your own fear to suffuse you, letting it reside in every fibre of your being, projecting it back at him in tiny sips.  Slowly dip feeding him until you could drown him in it.  Letting it swallow his own fear, so conceited by his own ignorance that he hadn’t the sense to walk away.   

“I know you dropped your walls.”  

He had come to a stand, and you could feel his fingers brush up against your skull. His fingers biting into you, whilst tendrils of force wove their way back into your mind.  You knew he still shouldn’t be able to break through, but there was an aura of triumphant glee that worried you.  

“You fear me finding something?  Why are you here 22758; you have not given a thought to your mission for days; shall I see what you really fear me finding?” 

He was right; but then you had trained to think ahead; it was why you were picked. You knew you had reacted too strongly to that taunt and it had not gone unmissed.  There was a metallic chuckle behind the mask, you could feel the glee behind his tone as he spoke; he knew. 

“Her, 22758? Who is She?”  

He sprinted through a new set of memories. Carelessly rutting through them, your thoughts, until he came to those that had previously held no importance to him.  Searching until he found the one that now made you flinch as he breathed a sigh of exultation.  Punching through the walls and forcing you to relive something you had chosen to forget; the last thing you wanted to remember. 

You had been so young; too young to be sent alone; and necessity meant that it had been your first meeting with the women you were to be sent to.  The one where she had helped you climb from the wreckage of a shuttle.  Helping you climb over the littered debris, whilst you shell-shocked wondered how you had survived the journey let alone the crash. The ship had been too damaged before take-off to make a safe landing.  The pilot sealing you all in the cargo bay creating an airlock to ensure you had oxygen.  It had been bitterly cold in hyperspace and though you couldn’t now recall the faces you had clung onto; there had been two others locked in there with you.  All three of you huddled together for warmth, creating your own heat to prevent hypothermia.

Though you could now only clearly remember one face; the one that haunted your childhood nightmares until it was locked off to you.  The terrified face of the pilot who had sacrificed himself for you. Not that he knew he had much hope of him or the craft surviving the landing; even you as a small child had understood the odds.

Of the woman you mainly remembered the calmness she wrapped you in, as she held out a gloved hand to you. How it felt as you took it in your own tiny hand, warmth radiating from her grip, suffusing your frozen body as she lifted you into her arms and led you away to safety.  The pilots mummified body sprawled half out of the cockpit viewport, the oxygen mask still attached. She had buried your face in her robes as she lifted you; and you had not looked back as she led you away, safely into the lush canopies of Nyriaan.

You had never found out what had happened to the other two children aboard the ship. The pilot of course had been buried his bravery and identity, swallowed forever in an unnamed grave on the planet Nyriaan.  But the children were never again mentioned; and somehow you had forgotten to ask. 

  
His laugh broke through the memory and his taunting began afresh as he wallowed in his pleasure at finding the memory.   “Whoever she is, I can sense some power behind her blocks, no wonder you had escaped our notice.  Who was she to you little Jedi, your guardian or your master?” 

Those names were like liquid lead in your mouth, it mocked what could have been; what should have been. Had Kylo Ren not decimated the Temple then you too would have trained to become a Jedi; just as your brother and all who had gone before you had.  Your rescuer had tried, but angry and hurt you refused the training.  Leaving once you were old enough.  Afterwards you adapted, willing to learn in the years to come only what had kept you alive.

He left you no time to your pity before he dived once more into your memories. Desperate now to uncover more memories of the woman. His touch becoming more vicious the more you refused to let him see. It felt like talons raking back and forth across your skull as you fought to keep him out.  A howled scream of frustration finally ringing inside your head as he realised his failure and disengaged. 

You were prepared for the worst, there was a failsafe in your mind, set to wipe the information should an actual bond form. Sensing that this as your only option, you concentrated; hard.  Ren although, though easier to steer to the path you needed him to take would be the more difficult one to control. But he was getting dangerously close, and so you were forced to act.  Any hate you had towards your for doing this, was pushed aside.  You needed desperately to find a way to distract him; to bind him to yourself without having him realise you were force sensitive.  

Swallowing, you let yourself go; utilizing the remaining traces of the drug in your system, until genuine lust overtook any remaining hesitance.  A deep breath and you ensured your chest rose on each inhale.  Suggesting with your eyes what you could not truthfully do with your mouth; you were female.  Weak, pliant and trapped; he could use this against you, everything he couldn’t take from your mind he could take from your body.  This could hurt you physically in ways that Hux had not the guts yet to try; he would succeed where Hux had not.  

Hesitantly his fingers traced a jagged line along your collar bone.  The seams of his gloves catching on the littered cuts and scratches Hux had gifted you with.  Trailing them across your breast to flick his thumb over one nipple.  You tried not to feel disgust, at your bodies willing response to what you were putting him through.  Pure hate fuelling your lack of morals, you threw back your head in a exaggerated; bust still tiny moan.  Biting your lip as though embarrassed and afraid of that arousal as you looked up through lowered lashes at him.

His fingers seemed to have found themselves slowly drawn to your neck, wrapping his huge paw around your delicate vertebrae until he controlled when you could breathe.  Gently allowing you air at first as he bent to suck hard on your exposed nipple.  Squeezing harder against the column of flesh, whilst his teeth bit into you.  His thumb pressing into your pulse point, leaving you light headed, dizzy.  His other hand unclipping your leg restraints to snap your legs open and hastily wrap them around his hips. 

He seemed unsure as he looked to the space between you; and that almost crumbled your resolve.  Relieved when shaky fingers touched tentatively against your sex.  The soft leather rubbed over the copious slick, before sliding them between them; lust finally finding his bravery for him.  Perhaps it was experience that made his tough rough; but you hardy needed any encouragement to make you wetter.  Certainly not with the synthetic lust already coursing your system, making you whine encouragingly despite the pain that came with his roughness.

You felt his legs tense, his visor watching as your mouth attempted to cry out for him to let you breathe. Your vocal chords muffled by the fingers pressed to hold your windpipe closed tight whilst you struggled for oxygen. Vaguely aware through your pounding vision of a shift between his legs, as he freed himself from his trousers, a grunt slipping through the mask as he slid it inside you.  He held still, allowing you tiny bursts of oxygen, just enough to stop you from passing out.  Feeling your body twitch and writhe against him as it was denied air. Your struggles humping against him, forcing you to fuck yourself against his cock.  His helmet lolling back, whilst the room darkened.  Ren loosening his fingers before you had a chance to slip into unconsciousness. Coughing and sucking in the blessed oxygen, whilst as he slid his cock repeatedly into you.

The sudden head rush it caused made the room spin around you and he yanked you closer to him, burring himself deeper inside you as the restraints bit painfully into your overstretched limbs.  He was never going to last that long; but this was all about making him lose control.  Your mind knew that you did not need the release your body thought it did, as he pounded into you with all the enthusiasm and inexperience of a novice.  His hips losing all sense of rhythm as his chest finally rose and fell in one enormous sigh.  One hand wrapped around your thigh, his hips moved tight to you.  The other hand pressing against your abdomen to steady himself as he stilled.  Hips jerking as he poured himself into you, taking a moment to steady himself, whilst he sobered up from his orgasm.

With his sobriety came the realisation of what he had just done; but not why he had been compelled to do it.  His movements seemed cloudy as stepped back unsteady on his feet, struggling to tucked himself away. Quickly seeking to step back to a much needed, safe distance between you both.

“Ren!”

That strangled shout held every tone of disgust he had for what had just happened as the General strode into the interrogation chamber.  The one look at him, showing him sneering at the mess between your thighs; the mix of both you and Ren. You closed them quickly, all too aware of the change in the slickness slipping down onto your thighs.

“That is my prisoner; what in hell do you think you are doing?”  

You knew that it could not be that he had realised what you had done. You had not even hoped that Ren having used one of the prisoners for his own amusement would be of such personal importance to him.  This was something more than what you had dreamed to achieve with all your careful planning.  It was the first time you had seen the men this openly at odds with each other; their first real disagreement in front of you. The General refused to even look at Ren as he moved to the control panel on the wall; summoning an escort.  The Troopers dragging you from the cell; not even allowing you’re the usual chance to cover yourself.  

It was the first time you had made the journey unseen by other troopers, and you suspected they took a different longer route with you.  Not the short twisted one they took whilst you where blindfolded, but a swift stomp down a cold, harshly-lit durasteel corridor. The metal colder than usual against the bare soles of your feet.

They shoved you roughly into your cell; giving you once last kick, before the door slid locked.  Leaving you naked, unwashed and without a cover to keep warm; to wallow in the filth you had created.  Itchy cum crusting on your thighs, until it solidified, and your nails could scrape it off.   

The bang on the door precipitated the arrival of your next meal and you scrambled quickly. All too aware how eager you seemed for the meagre, foul tasting bowl of slop that was to come.  Snatching it up from the floor and holding it in both hands, as you shuffled until you were resting against the wall.  Swirling the contents within the bowl, before bringing it unwillingly to your lips.

Each new meal honestly seemed to be the vilest thing you had ever tasted. But you forced yourself to swallow it.  You were hungry, and the meal was designed to offer precious little in the way of nutrients; but you needed them.  Just enough to keep you alive and fend off any real damage to your internal organs, avoiding them shutting down on you.

To make it last, you took the smallest of sips from the edge of the bowl.  The congealed muck, almost making you gag, as it coated tongue. Swallowing each mouthful, until you felt something odd in the last one. You sucked the gruel from it, spitting it out into your hand.

That the item had survived being uncooked, and unprocessed was an unlikely oddity in its self. That the sweet item should find itself in the savoury mix offered to you was also equally as strange. Still, you rolled it around in your fingers, finding that there was no damage to the berry beyond the slight bruising it had received by your tongue.  Deciding it was harmless, you set it once more to your lips. Eagerly slipping it past them, to grind the fleshy sweetness until there was nothing left of it. The small berry flooding your unused taste buds with the memories of home.  They knew you were alive and had gotten word to their spies; she had taken your message to the Resistance, which meant that there was still hope.  

This time you had not yet finished your meal before they came from you. The Stormtroopers, taunting you with the remains.  Splattering the mess on the floor and then pinning you face down in the mess, rubbing it over both cheeks as they lent to attach their binders.  They dragged you, arms clasped behind your back again naked, unblind folded and unprotected from other First Order personnel. Taking you through the corridors of what you realised now must be another planetary based military base.

Your passage was hardly subtle, and you kept your head lowered in shame.  Ignoring the catcalls, the taunts and the offers to put the resistance scum in their place as you walked on, struggling with your unconditioned and very weakened body to keep up with their fast pace.  Your only saving grace, was that it seemed no one dared to touch you whilst you were naked.  Your cheeks red, as they led you inside of one of their shower blocks.

Your wrists were briefly demagnetized and then clipped to a hook dangling from the ceiling.  Leaving you once more stretched out on the very tips of your toes whilst they hosed you; the difficult poise effecting your balance.

Military footsteps ringing out against the tiled floor, the troopers standing to salute their commanding officer, who gave an instruction for both to remove their helmets.  You heard General Hux hand over something behind you, to one of the troopers and one came into view.  Her hair short; but features feminine; confirming any suspicions you had had, regarding the female soldiers.  He dismissed her, and she saluted once more, before leaving the room to join her comrade.  Leaving you this time alone with General Hux, a man who seemed more alert to you than Kylo Ren.  

His face was pure poison as he sauntered around to look down on you.  His carriage and deportment perfect as always.  Controlled and restrained for all his eyes shot daggers at you with every scrape of his feet on the tiled floors.  You felt dirty, and were relieved as your eyes lowered, that they had seen fit to hose the dried seamen and dirt from your body before his arrival.  General Hux always made you feel dirty, even without the current evidence of your behaviour to confirm his perceived opinion of you. His eyes flickered briefly over your prone form, your nipples stiff and painful from the cold. Pointing like an un wanted offering to him, as they were forced forward by the painful arch your back created as you balanced on the balls of your feet.  

There was soap, as he ran his hands appraisingly over you. Making you inhale sharply against the sensitivity of your skin as he massaged those more sensitive parts of him.  Fished something from his pockets and watching as you tried wearily to discern what pain today’s game would bring. You thankfully had caution enough that you choked back any sarcasm at what he was doing; but it was hard.  He seemed aware of your internal struggle. Using the unknown object to lift your chin at him.  Tilting your neck from side to side whilst his eyes narrowed at the mess Ren had added to it.  

You moved willingly, allowing him to see the bruises his rival had seen. Then you shivered, his free hand pressed hard over the thick bruises Ren’s fingers had left whilst you focused on the roof.  There was puff of warm breath, a precursor and the only warning of his teeth as he bit hard over every single fingerprint.  Covering the marks with teeth marks and saliva; leaving a challenge to the previous man.  Reminding both you and Ren exactly who’s prisoner you were.

Satisfied, he too a step back, uncurling the item in his hand. Twirling a un unguarded razor between his fingers and you shivered; gasping as he pressed the cutthroat in a dangerous waring to your throat.  The terror of the naked sharps to your throat making you forget to even breath. A deeper smirk and he took it away. The message clearly understood as he ran it the length of your legs; one slip would make him cut you.  You stood perfectly still, breath baited, at each pass along your skin, the position making your legs ache.  General Hux wiping the shorn hair on a cloth after each pass, whilst you tried no to even shiver.  Satisfied with his work, he added another level to your degradation.  Lifting one leg to hook the ankle over his shoulder and the blade was held against you again.  This time against your most intimate of areas and removing the hair there.  Your leg almost shook as it struggled against your weight, unwilling to trust that you could lean more against him.

His dismissive growl echoed well in the empty room.   “If that leg goes down little soldier, you will cut yourself.”

You were not a wilfully naughty child, who insisted on going against his best wishes for you; he was your jailor and it probably would make him happy if you did.  But your resolve grew stronger, as you forced yourself to hold out for the last few passes; you would not give him the satisfaction.

Once finished, he unfastened you from the hook.  Unclipping your wrists from their binders and then instead of hosing you down, he led you over to a row of showerheads.  He directed you to clean yourself, this time giving you the soap to use.  After the almost painful hosing that you were forced to endure on an almost daily basis; this basic right seemed like a luxury.  You willingly soaped yourself over, languidly rubbing it gently into your scalp, enjoying the gentle touch of your own hands against your skin.  Enjoying the sensation of finally feeling clean; ignoring the pair of grey eyes which constantly watched you.  

Finished you stepped from the shower, taking the towel he held out at arm’s length to you; his blaster ready in the other. You went to take it from him before pausing midstride.  To take it you’d have to step closer to him, and there were definite signs of hunger in his eyes.  Afraid this was a warning of a trap, you waited. Too afraid to take it, but also painfully aware of the effect your nakedness, shivering in the cold room until you decided what to do. You stood for what seemed like an eternity, before you finally convinced your muscles to step forwards to take the towel.  

He refused to let it go and fearful of the blaster; you looked to him in question.  Fear making a snarked comment grow on the tip of your tongue until he raised a single eyebrow to you. Ren was not present; nor could you sense him; but you dared not search too obviously for him.  Struggling to get your tongue to process the command to speak, you croaked out an unusually compliant ‘thank you’. 

He let you pull the corner of the proffered fabric to you; but refused to let go of it.  His face still devoid of an opinion, you froze at the realisation; that despite your compliance he still wasn’t going to give it up. Terrified thoughts of what came next fought to take over the calmness that came with training, whilst you clutched at the possibilities.  You were best not to test him, not now at least.  Given his standing amongst the military, his need for respect you clutched at the one thing you could think of, speaking forth the answer as a query to him. 

“Sir?” 

His muscles relaxed as he let go the towel and relaxed the arm free of the blaster.  Quickly you shielded yourself in comforting softness of the towel to rub yourself dry.  Turning your back quickly to him, waiting as he held another offering out to you. You thanked him again, this time following immediately with his honorific.  Tucking the towel firmly against yourself you pulled the drab fabric over your damp hair. It felt odd to be covered with real clothes after so long, even if it was just a simple shift dress.  But this one reached half way down your legs, it offered protection.  

General Hux kept his blaster in hand as he walked out of the room. There were no instructions and taking it as a test you dropped the towel and began to follow him. Feet slapping as you ran barefooted on the cold painfully latticed durasteel floor, struggling at best to keep up with his strides.

The officers and troopers you passed stood aside for him.  None of them held back from throwing their usual insults at you and although no one would actually touch you the message was understood. This man who both tortured you and was the actual cause of your danger was the only protection you had here; this was a gentle reminder to remain complaint.  

You followed until you reached a door, you following him inside, he locked the door. Using both an unseen code, and pressing his palm against a scanner. Speaking both a warning and an explanation for the new quarters to you. 

“In time you will comply.  Yet for now, there will be no escape from this room, nor will anyone be bringing you any unsanctioned items.”  

There was a small narrowing of his eyes; minute enough that it took all your training to see it.  Further confirming your suspicions that the berry had been a message to you.  Unlike him; you feigned total indifference at his actions; whilst he stepped towards another door, once more beckoning for you to follow.   “You will of course eat in here, bathe in here; in fact, any and all activity which forces you to encounter another being will be watched at all times by myself, is that clear?” 

  
You followed him through the doorway, it led into a much larger set of rooms, and your brows knit together as you realized from the fastidious neatness alone, that these where his quarters. You would be watched closely, kept right under his nose for him to observe at all times.  You shook the thoughts away not wanting to dwell yet on despair; there was always hope. 

He moved towards a table, sat down on it was a tray containing a single cup. It still wasn’t solids, but the soup he provided was better tasting than anything else you had been given. You eyed it nervously, the smell making your mouth water and your stomach growl. You wanted to eat it; but nothing the General had done had been without an ulterior motive. You dipped a finger into the soup.  He had made sure it was warm enough to be comforting, but not hot enough to cause damage should you choose to throw it at him.  

General Hux was impatient, sighing at your refusal, moving away to sit down on a nearby facing couch. He replaced the blaster back in its holster and took up a datapad; leaving you to your dilemma. This was you first time you had been around him unshackled; and your fingers itched, as you realised you should search for a way to escape. You thought through your options, you particularly well trained in hand to hand, so you could use combat to outright try rushing him; but it would not be the wisest course of action.

You suspected strongly that even if you could use your few mind tricks, working alongside Ren had made him ensure he was resilient to anything subtle; which left only one option. You sighed; loudly. Ensuring that he looked over at you. His fingers twitching to his side arm, in reflex, that made you play the only hand left to you.  You blinked in exaggerated slowness at him and allowed your cheeks to colour.  Lowering your gaze to the soup before taking a small enough sip to just wet your lips. 

You kept your gaze innocent, your movements natural; avoiding any overt sexual mannerisms what might warn him. You slipped your tongue between them to lick the remnants of the soup, looking back over your shoulder to see if it was working. It seemed it was going take much more to push him, than it had Ren and you swiped an imaginary drop from your décolletage, before popping your finger into his mouth and sucking them clean.  His eyes widened at the normally obvious sexual gesture and you repressed a horrified shiver.  Instead concentrating on the fear and arousal you wanted him to feel.  

He baulked for a moment, and you thought you’d not done it right.  Until he stood, walking towards you.  His desire now apparent, in a pink flush of his own; his pupils widening the closer he came to you.  Suspecting this was to his taste; you cowered submissively.  Lips parting as he reached down stroking at your cheek. Gentle until he tangled one hand into your hair. His fingers roughly pulling you to the balls of your feet; the chair tumbled somewhere behind him.

Keeping a hold of your hair, he pulled you back as he stepped forwards to bring your back flush with him.  Making you cry out in pain, as he yanked your head back to expose your face to him, and his teeth buried themselves once more in your flesh.  

He changed hands, using the other to tighten at your neck, forcing you to look at him. Eyes showing no gentleness in his arousal; but his lips softening, parting as he watched you. Breath fervent as he absorbed the fear in your eyes, as you felt the cold press of steel against it.  Struggling against your dread you didn’t flinch, realising he had placed the razor from earlier against your throat.  Trailing it leisurely down the side of your neck, keeping the touch light enough to scratch; but not to cut deep.  You gave a breath of relief, as he guided it down away from your jugular. His face a passive mask of stoicism, betraying nothing, until his eyes lit with fire as he flicked the blade, pressing the sharp to just above your collar bone and tracing a deeper line parallel to it.  You gave a small mewl of pain, and he reverently kissed your cheek, making you screw your eyes tight as he obscenely licked away the salty residue of a single tear.  

The cuts seemingly randomly and without warning, following a pattern only he could set.  Yes he had a personal interest in the torture; each gasp and whine echoed in the strum of the cock at your backside.  Blood trickled slowly between your breasts, and he dropped the blade to the floor, his foot tossing it further aside; discarded, forgotten somewhere under the table. Using the same hand to smear the fluid across your neck, leaving prints of it on to your cheeks. Dipping to press his lips to it, his tongue tasting it as he kissed you.  His thumb collecting more of it and smearing your own a lips thick rouge to match his.  Pushing the digit past them. Pressing it onto your tongue and turning you to him to watch as you sucked the salty iron from it.  His breath uncontrollable as you licked your tongue against it, running it around the tip like you would his cock.

He looked at you once more, and this time he spoke almost lovingly, a breathless chuckle, as his eyes displayed the awe he felt at your actions.  

“Such a little masochist.”  

You nodded your accent at his words, dipping your gaze, as your cheeks tinged with genuine pleasure at his gifted title.  Your chin lifted back to him as you softly spoke your whispered words less a reply, more an admonishment to yourself of what he was.  The tinge of sarcasm misread by his lust.

“That would make you my sadist then would it?”

His lips twitched almost to a half smile. Obviously pleased with himself, as he lowered his face to stare down reverentially at you through lidded eyes.  Dripping his lips to yours in a kiss that displayed an oddly tender moment for this man.  

You opened your mouth to him to taste yourself on his lips. Taking back the blood he had so tenderly gathered and returning it once more to your body. He took your bottom lip between his teeth, biting hard enough to bruise.  Soliciting a gasp from you as he released it and you could taste the freshness of the blood in it.  He studied your swollen lip, his pupils so filled with lust they threatened to swallow his irises, and you took this as your signal that he was far enough gone, dropping to your knees in absolute submission.  

He was coherent enough to place his sidearm on the table directly behind you, whilst you grasped his buckle in hand ready.  Waiting for the permissive nod, before unfastening the belt dropping it with the trousers to the floor. He was already hard and throbbing your body thankfully given into this rouse, moisture gathering between your legs. The rest of you displaying the distinctive traits of a woman in the throw of lust as you took him between your lips.  Repeating on his cock, your earlier ministrations to his thumb. Teasing, before letting him sink all the way to the back of your throat, letting him pump himself into you; to recklessly fuck your mouth.

You looked up at him, and he hiss rang between clenched teeth at the sight of you. Your lips wrapped around his cock, his fingers tangled into your hair. Drool smattering everywhere, your cheeks, your breast, the floor, your eyes wide and streamed with moisture as you looked up at him. He threw his head back, and you took the close of his eyes as your signal; he was on the cup of completely letting go. Preparing yourself for the knowledge; this fight was probably going to hurt, a lot.

First you bit.  Then quickly you landed a hard to the punch to the inside of his thigh, forcing his leg open to bring your fist straight up over his already painful cock. He grunted in pain doubling over; but he was no novice. He held onto you pulling hairs loose as he jerked your head, sharply down, bringing his knee up to greet it. You saw stars and tasted fresh blood, the force of the impact painfully splitting your lip in two places and loosening teeth. You remained calm though and reached an arm behind to grab the blaster, clasping it quickly you brought it up to slam no too gently under his chin.  

It forced his head up to the ceiling.  The sudden movement over balancing him and making him roll onto his back.  The swift fall, forcing him to let go of your hair tp steady himself. Both of you grunting with the effort as you rolled with him, the souls of his feet pressing into your stomach. Rolling with the momentum as he threw you back and over his shoulders.

You rose delicately to your feet and stepped back.  Pointing the blaster at him, as he slowly stood, raising his hands in surrender. You sneered triumphantly over at him.  His pathetic cock still hanging loose, his legs bare. Allowing him the small dignity wouldn’t have let you, of pulling up his trousers.

You would need him to walk you out, this room like the others would be coded. Silently you kept your eyes trained on him, waiting for him to finish.  Then smugly giving the order for him to unlock the door.

He turned his back to you and obeyed.  Limping slowly towards it before stopping, turning his head to grin manically, as he looked straight back to you.

“Actually, no.” 

The confidence in his expression unnerved you more than any of the torture. Then when he turned fully around and began walking back to you your heart began thudding wildly. There was no hurry as he leisurely stalked you; making you nervously step back.  Gripping the blaster for safety. 

"I will shoot.”

You would too, escape was preferable.  But if it no longer became an option then killing him was the best possible outcome, figuring his death would be a fair exchange for you failing to deliver the message. 

He continued his steady approach, and when you spoke again it was to your dismay that your words belayed the panic you really felt.

“General Hux I will shoot, stand still!”

You pointed the firearm at his knees to make a disabling warning shot.  Ensuring the safety was off and fired.  Panic giving way to full blown terror when it failed to discharge a bolt. Frantically you checked the small arm. There was no safety, it should have fired!  

The General almost upon you, you uselessly tried again.  The blaster still failed to go off, and in desperation you swung the arm holding it at his head.  He blocked it and followed with a swift jab to the undefended underarm, disabling the nerve cluster there.

Your arm went limp and your hand paralyzed.  Dropping the blaster with a clatter to the floor.  It was kicked it away far beyond your reach and taking advantage of your panic, General Hux swung you round. Pinning you so that your dominant arm was now behind you, slamming you down face first to the floor.

It was not a gentle drop, awaking a fresh flow of blood from your nose.  Now you could hear the jeer in his voice as you felt him pull back on your shoulder. Manipulating it into an odd angle and placing the other hand between your shoulder blades. Hitting hard to ensure a clean dislocation; if not a break. 

“That blaster is DNA coded to me, you stupid, stupid bitch.”

He was angry, but also far more, smug than you had been.  The docileness had all been a rouse then; meant to toy with you; to see what you would do.  With a whoosh, the main door to his apartments slid back, admitting this time a barefaced Kylo Ren; flitting his gaze between you and the General sat atop of you.  His expression went from concerned confusion, to a thoroughly conceited amusement as he looked down at the General pinning you in place.

Hux roared at him in fury, not supressing his anger at the situation one iota.  His breath panting with the exertion it took to force himself to find the calmness to speak.   

“Call a fucking medic Ren; now!”

Hux dug his fingers into your injured shoulder. Twisting them against the socket for good measure. Stopping when the team arrived and hurryed over to check his injuries.  Shoving them away as they automatically sought to help him.

“Not me you bloody idiots! Her! I want to fucking know what the fuck was missed on the preliminary body scans. What the fuck is she?” 

 He reached into the medics’ bag all the time he spoke.  Rummaging around and pulling forth a prefilled syringe.  Teeth bared and gritted as he began shoving it into the side of your neck. Your vision quickly fading to nothingness as the plunger was released and the sedative took hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone who was there have a good Celebration? Seems there were lots of Ren's and Hux's this time. Also apparently they're releasing a Hux graphic novel for all those without twitter or Tumblr to tell you, I would hope we're all going to buy it; if nothing else purely in the interest of research.


	4. White Noise

 You faded quickly in and out of a semi return to consciousness.  Aware that you were being prodded and poked at but unable to sense any pain.  The General pacing around you in a well concealed but concerned panic.  Reading the riot act to a group of nervous looking medical staff before placing you into a machine. 

They began their scans of you. The dose of sedative increased, so that it was enough to keep you immobile and cooperative.  Everything happening in a dream-like compliance, obedient but fully aware of what was physically happening to you. 

Their faces flitted in and out of focus.  All of them speaking over you like you were some sort of experiment. At times you were aware of the Generals distinctive face, as he conversed with that of his black masked counterpart; but not what was being said.  Your drug stupor making you look upon at least the redhead in the same light that you had in the bar you had been kidnapped from.

In another world, you would have enjoyed General Hux’s company. He was attractive, disciplined and well driven; and his counterpart was at least two of those.  It was such a shame that one was an evil nut job and the other was such a religious Xenophobe.  Or was it the other way around?

You frowned at your dilemma; or at least would have been frowning, if the drugs had allowed you to feel your face.  Mentally kicking yourself for having such disgusting and betraying thoughts; and instead your mouth thankfully slurred out a series of choice insults before breaking into uncontrollable giggles.  It was the drugs doing it to you realised as Hux leant over you, his brow raised in question at your antics as besides, you were sure you heard one of the medics reassured him this was normal. 

“Did you just complement me on my arse soldier?”

There were no signs of shock; or in fact any real reaction other than the wrinkling of his brows in confusion when he asked you to repeat yourself.  Making you suspect he had misheard you.  Quickly mumbled your answer, unaware of where you had faltered in your insult. Of course, he wasn’t unattractive; but he was also your sworn enemy.  That should make him as undesirable as hot lead, but deep down you had known that you had found it easy enough to draw on that attraction to manipulate him.   Thankfully there was a sudden rush of heady euphoria.  An electric tingling swarming your system and you realised as your eyes closed; that he had increased the sedative dose.  Blissfully sending you now to total darkness. 

You been woken this time without the medical staff, but still strapped down to the medical gurney. The two men nearby, their quiet snarls as they jostled against one another, flitting through the grogginess of half sleep. 

You smirked at how easy all of this was becoming.  Even if you had not of guessed that their working relationship was so strained from their actions together; this outright argument confirmed it.  It had been so easy to play Ren without giving too much of yourself away, his fear of failure all too obvious when he had stormed back to confront you.  It hadn’t taken much telepathy to work out that he had hoped to find your walls still vulnerable.

 Then to work out the failure, that he had felt at the missed opportunity.  You risked making him look weak in Hux’s eyes; of shaming him before a whole army; and so from there you had worked out his need to belittle you. The General however, he had been something else.  For him this was not about the competition he had had with the Commander.  For him to fall, all you had had to offer was what he secretly craved; but always denied himself around you.  But to do that it had been a necessary evil to overplay your hand; to reveal perhaps too much of yourself.      

 

“General, think of what we can do with her, the possibilities!”

It was obvious they were both discussing the different ideas how best to proceed.  Both wanting different things from you, still divided despite your recent attack against them.  If they thought to use you, then they should think again; they would get nothing. 

“Ren, can you not see the risk?  Already she has been manipulating us both, I for one, refuse to risk my men on a wild goose chase, we will go forwards with the originally agreed plan.”

General Hux’s more reasonable tones dismissed the idea that he had any say in the matter, and the realisation suddenly flitted through.  To Ren you were a possible force user.  Someone that could be utilized for his own personal gains, which was a direct challeng to Hux’s opinion that you where his prisoner.

Without a regular dose, the sedative was wearing off quickly, but they had taken precautions against that eventuality.  It seemed that they were more prepared in their unwillingness to risk taking anymore chances with you.  You needed to know what that meant, and experimentally you raised your wrist.  Doing your best not to knock anything or raising it too far that it rattled and clinked.  Both your arms where firmly shackled at strategic points to the cot sides and your legs were held down with a series of binders.  Before had just been a matter of good acting convincing them you were still high, for the same length of time as a normal human would have been.  Of course the drugs had always worn off quickly.  They always did with your metabolism and now they knew; well, the game was up. 

You knew the punishment for failing in yesterdays escape attempt would be severe, especially if Hux administered it.  For this they were not so divided; and so you faked sleep a little longer in hopes for more time alone.  General Hux though, had noticed the changes.  His voice displaying his professional detachment of any emotion in a way Kylo Ren would never be able to.  Odd you thought that he could achieve with will alone what Ren struggled to do with a distorter.   

“I know that you are awake.”

It was pointless pretending and so you opened your eyes.  You were clearly in a side ward and although there was another bed; its current status was unoccupied.  The defiance in your glare swelling to proud heartfelt accomplishment as the redhead stood over you.  You had never liked hurting anyone and having the evidence of it displayed before you, would have usually had you questioning your own morals.  The white of his chin was a lovely mass of green and purple splodges.  So deep in colour that you almost winced at it; before remembering to whom exactly that face belonged to.  Given the genocide Hosnian Prime, you couldn’t care less.  You doubted strongly that he would have allowed himself pain relief for it; and hoped it hurt him as much as it looked.  

Your shoulder throbbed though you gathered that it had at least been put back into place.  So no lasting damage for you, from Hux’s little temper tantrum.  Sadly, just the both of you with a sense of injured pride.  You couldn’t help your attitude and you totally suspected that he’d make you pay for it later; but you had to show no fear.

“General Hux, you are looking truly stunning today! Did you dress up just for me; oh, and is that make up on your chin? Thank you so much for making all this effort for me; and where might the lovely Ren of gotten to, I haven’t said hello to him yet.”

Your voice sounded too chirpy. Your play at bravery far more than you felt; you had played your hand too soon your escape now would be almost impossible.  The General showed all the maturity you refused to and ignored your jab at his appearance.  Making your jab sound all most childish and pointless. For all you knew from his smirk that it was having some sort of an effect on his patience.

“Ren is currently indisposed. Which is for the best, given how you seem to have identified him as the weaker link in your little plan.  Not to worry that will soon be addressed.”

He pushed your head roughly to the side; pressing non too gently into the mattress below you.  Turning it to face away from your injured shoulder; it re-awoke the sharper pain

“Pheromone suppressants.”

 You struggled as you felt the tell tail pinprick of another needle.  You didn’t need the vitriolic explanation to identify the substance for you.  He was an educated man, this would have been your first guess; he just wanted to gloat.

“It would appear 22758 that the primary scans had identified something different with your DNA, something that the medical staff thought unnecessary to report.  Do not concern yourself though mistakes such as those, will not be made again.”

You had calculated that when the drugs were not administered before, it was a crucial part of your escape plan.  This so-called abnormality showed as such a small percentage of nonhuman DNA, it would have been overlooked. It shouldn’t have made any differences or offered any changes to your human abilities.  So the medics would not have bothered checking it out.  Assuming that it wouldn’t be worth the time or the work and they had probably passed your whole DNA off as human.  That had meant that you could manipulate them without using the force.  Avoiding triggering any early alarm bells with Kylo Ren.  You grinned at that.  Wishing you could have been conscious to see the General’s reaction when the medical staff told him that they had messed up. 

He pinched your chin forcing you to look at him. Able to see him close up, it was a little bit of a shame that you’d had to do that to him; after all he was quite pretty, even for a fascist.  There was a small split on his jaw line and the birdlike stitches spidering across it suggested it would probably scar; good he would have a permanent reminder. 

“We have identified your unusual ability to metabolize drugs faster despite only having the one liver; and of course, you have fully functioning pheromone producing capabilities. Are there any other abilities we are unaware of?”

Your amused smile turned into a defiant smirk; teasing him “one moment General I’ll just get you a list.”  You waited; but the pain you’d expected for your behaviour did not come.  Confusing you when instead of punishing you; he instead rolled his eyes in disapproval.  His tone now more that of a parent scolding their errant teenager, than captor and prisoner.  

“It appears that the application of pain as the sole method works neither as a deterrent, or control mechanism with you 22758.  Therefore, I am proposing a new approach. Simply put, when you are ready for your punishment, I will be waiting to administer it.”

If you didn’t have such an intimate knowledge of his thirst for blood shed; then you would have laughed in derision at him.  You had expected a repercussion when you’d woken from the sedative; but to have to ask for it was beyond ridiculous.  What did he expect you do?  Lower yourself onto bended knee and start begging for your castigation? Not likely.

“Naturally 22758 the longer it will take for you to accept your place and cooperate, then the worse your punishment shall be.”  

“We both know the chances of that happening as slim to none,” Your tone was dismissive at first, now you were laughing at the ridiculousness of his idea.  Switching to sarcasm and rolling your eyes in mock surrender. “okay, okay, fine General I’ll ask just in, say 90 years or so.”

He gripped your jaw tighter.  Snarling and fixing you with that frigid stare he did so well.  His nose nearly pressed right against yours; his words dipped into a dangerous growl, works spat forth from clenched teeth.  “Don’t under estimate me soldier, one way or another you will beg for it before I am through with you.”

He relinquished your jaw.  Pulling a nearby chair towards you and seemed to use the brief separation to collect himself his face returning to calm; impassive of the recent anger. Too easy you thought, worrying at him like a dog with its favourite chew toy.

“Aww General, are you’re not goanna hold my hand and go all weepy on me; are you? I rather gathered that heartfelt emotions were more Ren’s forte.”

To his credit there was barely a sigh, before he spoke again.  Doggedly keeping to his persistent need to gain information from you.

“It appears that all the physical messages sent were decoys.  Leading us to believe that the mission was never the physical exchange of property which we were led to believe.”

“Not as dumb as you look are you General.” 

He ignored you though for a second you could have sworn he almost rolled his eyes at you again.  In his thirst of knowledge, he was letting you run your mouth off it was a trap and you went slowly.  You knew you would get away with a lot more than was usual when he was up to something; but you had to tread carefully.

“Which means that since all the others are now dead; you most likely were told the details of the assignment, and then had those memories wiped.  It suggests that you where the actual bearer of the message. Being that as the only force-sensitive of this group, you are the only one who could be trusted to carry such priceless intel.”

You nodded, there was no sense in pretending you hadn’t known that at one point you may have known. It gave nothing away and since the General had pretty much warned you it was your only way of staying alive; it was harmless to agree.  

“You won’t be able get at it though General.  There are too many failsafe’s set in place, better that you kill me now if that’s what you intend to try.”

In answer to your honesty, he rewarded you with some of his own.  Rising to move restlessly around the room, picking at various objects and then replacing them. Busying himself as he spoke to you.

“We know of course from our equipment that you have never been lying to us.  That is of course because you know nothing; I doubt that you even recall how the message was implanted into your system nor where in your mind it was placed.”

You blinked at him; the truth helping to keep your face a blank page.  He was right particularly in that one respect, you would tell him nothing; not after what he had done to the others.  You tried not to think of your comrades, their screams as they died.  Of them being pulled apart by Hux as Ren worked so expertly besides him to divest their minds of their mortal counterparts. 

You swallowed stilling yourself before you asked; your next taunt easily found in the truth. They of course deserved your rage at their deaths, but they also deserved your respect for their sacrifice.

“Did you enjoy torturing them to their deaths General? Do you look forward to being able to eventually do that to me General?”

Of all things he suddenly and very briefly looked shocked. Responding quickly, but not as smoothly as you would have expected. The indifference in his reply too false in its severity.

“You imagine 22758 that I have the time to personally oversee every interrogation?  No, my little soldier yours was an interesting case for me and dying has never been an option for you.”     

You lost all control at that, the suggestion that what you would be something else to him. Terrified that he had found a use for you, as more than his prisoner. Unable to continue on the level sarcasm you started with, too much rage, too much hurt coming through in the end not to shout them at him.

“What you want me to finish that blowjob for you General, go on get it out and I’ll bite it off for you this time.”

“You imagine I have any interest in you, 22758.”

He lied. If you had not seen in in his chambers then, you had seen it now when his cheeks coloured as he spoke his refusal.  To showed him your defiance you refused to give him the satisfaction of flinching as he moved back to you, raising his hand as though to strike; then with a thoughtful pause lowered it to bizarrely stroke at your cheek.  It struck you as odd that his tone was honestly gentle, rather than patronising. Especially given you knew you had riled him. 

“You never learn do you, my little soldier?”       

That ‘my’ was taking it too far, you would never be his anything; and now you did lose control.

“I am not your fucking soldier!”

You screamed as a blinding, white pain shot through your head. Your vocal chords threatening to break and body convulsing, as you lay trapped by the agony of it.  It was more intensive than anything you had ever endured, threatening unconsciousness like a black wave looming.  That would have been a relief though; and the wave never hit the shore. Instead the pain subsided as quickly as it had come, leaving you shaking with its aftermath, sobbing in pain.

“I have taken the liberty of fitting both a tracking chip, and a restraining device.  The will render you useless should you try and escape again and keep you obedient.”

His tone was back to absolute control; that of a man who expected his orders to be obeyed unfalteringly.  Who knew he had just played all the aces in the deck.  

“Now shall discuss what you are?”

“Nope?”

He sighed as though you really were a trial to him, raising what you assumed to be the control settings to your control chip. 

“I’ll warn you now, it is designed to keep you conscious; no matter how painful.”

Oh, he was too good at reading you; he had given you your rope and he had hung you with it.  It was only a matter of time before he worked it all out.  It was worthless suffering; better to let him think you were cooperating.

“You know then that I have a small percentage of Zeltron DNA, yes?”

He dipped his head in accent, eyes slightly narrowing in question; his question explaining why he was confused. 

“Yes we have.  But you have not enough that you should be able to use the particular traits of that, _species_.”

So not a fan of nonhuman species then; that was to be expected.  You shrugged. This next bit would go horribly wrong if he didn’t believe you; if he realised it was probably your force-skills that permitted it. 

“I honestly don’t know why I can use those traits, General.”  

He looked sceptical, fingers twitching over the button, you prayed he would take your word for it; drawing on the element of truth within it.

“Please Sir, honest I don’t know how, or why; I just know I can.  Just please don’t press that thing again.” 

You had used both the honorific and title in an attempt to placate him.  You honestly didn’t know why you had picked up those Zeltron traits from your grandparents.  Outwardly you looked completely human, no red skin, no second liver; there really was no excuse for it.  But you could still do certain things full blooded Zeltrons could. 

“Then you are capable of choosing to manipulate your pheromones.”

It wasn’t really a question; but you could hear the desperation in his voice for an answer.  You didn’t tell him anything he didn’t already know; but to gain his trust, he needed to hear it from you.  Even if at first you had been tempted to refuse him the answer.  Until you remembered how it had felt when he had assaulted you.  The pain and humiliation that had made you so desperate to try anything; even self-degradation to escape him.

“Yes,”

You lowered your head in shame offering more information both in an apology and attempt at keeping the subject on your chosen track.  Offering him a snippet of information in trade for his trust.

“and I have limited telepathy, even without the force.” 

“Enough that...” 

You knew he needed a valid excuse for letting his guard down.  That if he didn’t get the answer he needed to hear, then he would make you suffer his mistake.  Your voice even to you on ears sounded deflated, sad and this time you hid your lie well for him.  Aware that he would be able to this knowledge use this against you, you spoke dooming your dignity in the process of trying to save what was left.

“Yes General, it was me manipulating you I made you do it, I’m sorry.”

He seemed relived at your words; but neither of you where that stupid.  He’d of course had to have been already aroused, but this was one time when you suspected being entirely honest with him was not what he wanted.  What he had done to you on the interrogation table was one thing.  His arousal at seeing you naked was driven by his lust for power.  But you suspected that for him to have openly shown desire for a prisoner and an inferior species, would have gone against everything he had conditioned himself to believe.  He truly didn’t want to believe he would had sullied himself in such a way.  For the moment it was for the best if you both agreed to lie to one other on that front.   Accepting he stood; and you suspected he would have left if you hadn’t of spoken.  Nor you hadn’t held out much hope of an answer.

“What will you do with me General.”

“It is undecided.  Private.” 

It was a reward for both the lie and your honesty, that he stopped to give an answer. You made a play for another answer.  He owed you two, he first one for admitting what you where, the second for explaining away yesterday with a lie.

“Will I be tortured anymore?”

He sighed.  His forehead braking into a frown which whilst it reached his eyes, it stopped short of his mouth.  His answer not entirely true either; a lie for a lie.

“Not in the nature you have been, Private.  That is not to say you do not risk harm should you run short of your usefulness.”

You nodded in acceptance of his honesty.  You didn’t need to tell him you would undermine him at any opportunity.  He would already know that; he would expect nothing less from you.  His parting gesture was a gift entirely for you, an exchange of kindness you wouldn’t understand until later.

“Get some sleep, I will give you tonight. Tomorrow is soon enough for punishments to begin.”

You lay back aware that the General obviously had a use for you, otherwise you would have been executed.  They must still think the information you carried important.  You had known all along that you were the most likely candidate to carry the actual information.  Your force sensitivity made it easier to implant subconscious messages and to keep them safe.  But the failsafe was that, only the person it was intended for could decode it.  It had been useless for the First Order to try no matter how talented Kylo Ren was, the time spent had just been to try and protect the others.  Now the only option you could see left to them, was to use you to draw out the Resistance spies within the First Order.  But that too would be a waste of time. They were highly unlikely to show themselves whilst you where kept under Hux’s watchful eyes.

You had only been alone moments, before heavy footsteps sounded.  Making you tense in anticipation, aware that you were more reliant on your force abilities, now they had cut you off from your Zeltron ones.  He spoke from behind you, the mask of course present.

“So I see you can use some of your force traits then? And Hux still thinks of you as his does he, we will see.”

You belonged to neither of them. Prisoner or not, you were still your own person.  The steps continued towards you slow, calculating making you question if he ever did not look like a predator.  His mask trained on you, tilting your neck to examine the side.  It was to make you aware of the needle mark aware that he knew you had been cut off from that ability.  You smirked, eyes narrowing; not in the brattish behaviour you displayed for Hux, but in pure hatred.

 “What’s the matter sweetheart, did you think I actually wanted you.”

Your voice dripped cold sarcasm.  Ren flinched and you took that as a successful hit on his fragile ego.  It was different with Hux, him you could respect, he had at least stayed constant in his devotion to his Order, he was a man of war.  With Kylo Ren his devotion was all so petty and personal; all born from temper.  You could remember him from another time; a time before he was this man.  Him wholly despised from that time as much as you loved her; and it was that love for your rescuer, that had made you stoop so low to protect her. 

You had never given much thought to how to do this without manipulating your pheromones, but you tried now.  Amplifying your hatred and pushing those feelings back at him.  If he felt it, he didn’t show it, instead he gripped your chin making you look at him and you could feel his equal dislike of you rolling off him. Your eyes closed your body unable to fight off the force command to sleep; falling into the dream-like memory that he pulled forth.

_‘It was raining, the deluge of water falling in rivulets off everything, your feet sliding in the sloppy, cold mud. Your brain once again succumbing to the repetitive nightmare, no not quite the same.  The hackles on the back of your neck rose as you marked the differences; this time though you were not the unwilling passenger inside a child’s mind.  No, this time you stood apart from your childhood self, watching for the first time ever yourself react to the horrors around you._

_It was dark, but you knew that once that first flash of lightening came those dark boulders soon would materialise.  Not as the stones they appeared to be, but as the corpses of slain people.  Entities of all ages, races and breeds; all laid dead and dying around you.  Yourself a mess of fear and disbelieving confusion at what was happening._

_Everything in you wanted to run and scoop yourself up, to cradle your younger self from the monstrosity slowly striding towards you in jedi robes.  Instead you stared across in horrified fascination at the other Kylo Ren who stood beside you.  This one was also unmasked but his clothing was more relaxed, the lines softer, not quite the imposing garb he always wore around you.  Nor did his face hold the jagged scar that rutted across his face.  No, this wasn’t quite the Kylo Ren you saw in the flesh; but a smaller, weaker, more fearful person.  This version was the man he truly was, hurt alone and at times confused._

_“ **Yes, it makes us both less, resilient to our own perception of one another like this. But I remember you now and yet it is not you; you have changed so much.** ”_

_He broke off, seized by a sudden train of thought.  He tilted his head and although he spoke it was in your mind you heard his command.  Your eyes unfalteringly following the order your ears still hadn’t registered._

_‘ **Watch.** ’ _

_You did so in silent as you felt your childhood fear overwhelm you.  You could almost smell the acrid smell of your own urine; you were not ashamed to say you had wet yourself then.  Your tiny mind unable to process the carnage around you, unable to comprehend the fight or flight process and had chosen instead to freeze.  Rescued by a woman pulling you from your knees to lift you up._

_The reacently masked Kylo Ren strode closer and a man you knew as your father ran forwards. Your father scooping your tiny frame from the arms of a woman who you remembered as your mother.  She was injured.  Some sort of ranged weapon to the side and you remembered then that she had ran between yourself and the target. Her own body becoming the shield that had protected you from what would have been a fatal shot to one so you; turning back to face the approaching Kylo Ren._

_He was so close now, that the reflection in the chrome bands of his helmet could be seen clearly.  The yellow blade of your mother’s sabre humming as she activated it.  Turning to give your father the precious seconds needed to safely reach the ship._

_Your father deposited you into the waiting arms of the young Jedi Padawan; and you were directed to join the others sent away from the battle._

_How could you have forgotten him alive loving and protective; your brother had boarded the ship first and not died in the mud as you remembered.  And then the others there, how could you have ever forgotten them?  The silent version of yourself and the who always watched but never spoke to anyone but you.  Together you huddled flitting silent words of comfort across your force bonds, as your brother swore to protect you._

_A roar of anguish from your father drew your attention back to the battle where your mother lay slumped in the mud.  Her words a silent plea for her children to escape as she lay gasping, dying, her chest pierced by a slice of Kylo Ren’s red-hot sabre._

_“Get that ship in the air!”_

_Your father had roared his order; and beneath you the ship shuddered, your sisters sobbing as your brother pushed you all further up the ramp and into the cargo hold.  Whilst beneath you the monster, stomped one colossal boot onto your mother’s neck.  Infuriating your father as he turned to avenge, her, the fire in his eyes turning his irises to a horrifying shade of orange-yellow._

_He mock saluted his own purple sabre at Ren, reaching out with the force to pull your mothers inactivate one to his spare hand.  Both now active he charged Ren, the yellow blade of her sabre swinging in pattern with his.  You could feel anger and insecurity rolling off them both in waves, making you gasp under the weight.  Father had already known he wouldn’t make it off the planet but his pain at loosing her was too much too much to have to bare.  It had been his hope that he would die here as she safely escorted his family to safety; instead his final hope was that he would do so in avenging her death.  He fought Kylo Ren with a fury that belonged only to the mad.  Fuelled by a total disregard for his own mortality, managing cut to Kylo Ren; the bunt flesh of his thigh visible through the hole in his pants._

_You realised at that, that if his twin besides you removed his leggings; then even now in this shared dream state, he would still carry that scar._

_The battling Ren stepped back. Unable to best your father at battle, chose to try a different tactic he held up his arm. His fingers creating the invisible hold that was slowly leaching the life from your father._

_Your escape ship had risen now to the tops of the building and you felt a quick, violent jerk as the force users outstretched hand pulled it back towards him; your father sent to join your mother in the force._

_Besides you, your brother clasped you one last time to him. Unable to voice a final farewell as he leapt from the ship; the cargo hold closing behind you.  He cushioned his feet on a blanket of pure force, as he landed to face Ren. Running towards him as he redirected his energy, pushing a wall of pure force energy at him. Kylo Ren staggered back, almost falling before he cleanly detached your elder brothers head with a lucky swipe of his sabre._

_Inside the ship you had all screamed at the loss of your brother’s force signature.  But his sacrifice had been enough, free of Ren’s tether on it, the ship rose quickly once more. Clipping itself on a nearby wall, but smoothly climbing to break the planet’s atmosphere; and besides Ren you watched it leave. The scenery around you dissolving and taking with it Ren; and all that he had accomplished that cruel, fateful night.’_

He had at least granted you the privacy to wake alone. Though that was small relief to the knowledge that he was currently using his gained intel to further his own wicked cause.  For the first time you wished you could have joined those dead in the Jedi Temple. Stifling a scream as tears welled at the remembered loss of your siblings.  How could you have ever forgotten them?  You had been so close that you could remember now how it had felt as you all had laughed and cried together; almost existing as one. 

How you had all felt inside one another’s minds when you shared thoughts.  The bond you had shared amplifying your connection to each other’s souls.  But that was it, you could feel it like the ghost of an empty presence.  Their faces you could remember as mirrored facets of yourself; but not the face you had now, so was that just the force bond reflecting your own back at you?  Their feelings you could remember clearly now also. Odd facts such as one of you had been mute, refusing to talk aloud even amongst yourselves.  The force becoming her voice and you her mouth piece; the other. she would talk but only to you.   But their names, what had happened to them after you knew nothing. 

You sobbed, unable to even wrap your arms around yourself for comfort as your body heaved with its fresh grief, until you eventually lay still.  Catatonic in your exhaustion as a fresh fear gripped you, what if they were by some small chance alive; where they in danger. No you thought your stomach heaving empty bile at the realisation. You would have felt it now if they had died that day, they were alive and out there somewhere. You had forgotten and in this memory; you had betrayed them to this monster. This creature who would now stop at nothing to find them.

   

 


	5. Contamination

It had been more than three whole standard cycles. since you had last slept.  Not that at this point you were anywhere near capable of the cognitive process needed to deduce this.  No, you only knew this, because at the start of each visit the General would gleefully let you know how many more hours you had been awake; offering you the chance to tap out and accept your punishment.   

The last count had been at eighty-two hours.  Not having been permitted to sleep since you had last been woken from your sleep in the Medicenter; you were beyond disorientated.  Everything hurt and you felt sick and dizzy; your eyes refused to focus properly on anything and moving was an effort.   You had, true to Hux’s word, been kept under observation at all time by himself.  Except of course, when the man slept; then, at start of his night cycle he had locked you within your cell.  A room which only he seemed to have the security clearance to access; and most likely had monitors fixed on it.  

Each time he had needed to leave you unattended in your room; he would order four Stormtroopers.  Each one tackling a limb and holding you down for him to inject a powerful stimulant.  One specifically designed to prevent your brain from allowing you to go to sleep. 

The first night you had naturally sat calmly in your room.  Not wanting to give General Hux the satisfaction, of seeing that the lack of sleep had upset you.  Reasoning that meditation was the most sensible route here; and if not, there was only so long this game could be played out.  Assuming either your body would overcome the drugs, or that he would not risk losing you before you broke.  You couldn’t have been more wrong.  

The second night you had made as much noise and chaos as possible.  Determined that if you were not sleeping you would disrupt General Hux’s sleep too.  Throwing everything around your room and banging limbs against every surface. Hitting your hands so hard that you left them swollen and bloody in places.   

Naturally, he had ignored you that night; and the damage you had done to yourself the next day.  But he had made sure to gag and cuff you to the bed for the third night.  Ensuring your arms and legs were tied tight enough to prevent you banging anything else.  Leaving you once again drugged up and unable to sleep, until he had come to greet you the next day.  Smirking as he moved about you with a false cheeriness that you knew was set to annoy you. Unusually chatty whilst he released you from the set of binders holding your legs.

Now thoroughly pissed off both from the insomnia and the sore muscles, you lashed out at him.  Angrier still as he deftly avoided the donkey-kick you aimed at him as you stood.  His face remaining cheerfully passive as he effortlessly caught the ankle you kicked at him.  Pulling it to a painful angle to ensure your cooperation, grunting as he twisted you onto the floor. Landing you suddenly onto your stomach; the bones in your legs, screaming at you to obey.  Palms slamming against the durasteel to save your face from anymore damage.   His voice even up beat, as he straddled your lower back, pinning you in place with his legs.

“A little tetchy this cycle, are we soldier?”

Your eyes narrowed at his taunt. All attempts at not playing into this game; gone away with your patience.  Struggling against him, whilst he folded his chest easily over your body.  His tall slender frame deliberately dwarfing yours. Caging you in place, his muscles surprisingly stronger than you had expected, as he draped himself over your back.

“Get the fuck off me, you pretentious fucking ass-hat.” That taunt got more of the rise you had wanted.  He dug his fingers roughly against your scalp, your hair catching on his gloves.  His hand twisting your head to the side and slamming it so hard to the durasteel floor that you saw stars.  Your cheek throbbing into an almost instant swelling; stinging where it had split.  Your teeth gritted as Hux deliberately rubbed your sores over the textured floor.  Refusing to scream, but silently thrashing against his hold on you. Bucking, determined to throw him off you, whilst foolishly expending your energies by calling him every name you could think of. Using more than a few different languages in your attempt to at least antagonize him.  

A click sounded on the floor next to your ear.  Your line of sight landing on the black controller now laid out besides you.  Oh, the message was received.  if you continued to act up, he would use it; and you had no wish to experience that level of pain.  His now free hand moved to stroke the back of your neck, making you shudder against the feel of skin-warmed leather. His mouth close to your ear, he murmured his praise for you. Calling you a good little soldier for stopping your struggling. Waiting until you were calmer, before placing the object back somewhere close, within the confines of his uniform. 

“I think we both can agree that the chip works better as a deterrent, rather than the actual punishment, yes?” You didn’t answer, not from attitude; but wrongly assuming his question had been rhetorical. Realising your mistake when his fingers tightened, digging mewls of pain from you, his voice a low growl at your ear.  “I asked you a question soldier.”  

“Yes.”  You whimpered, blinking back the tears forming at the pressure against your scalp.

“Yes what?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good girl.” He let go of your hair, rubbing his fingers soothingly over the pain he had just inflicted.  You felt him lift himself from you, raising his knees so he was no longer weighing you down; though you didn’t dare to take it as permission to move yet.

Hovering above you, he hummed in praise. Taking a moment before standing, his feet remaining either side of your still recumbent hips.  “Very good 22758, now up onto your hands and knees.” 

Fearful for the pain the chip could inflict, you obeyed.  Gritting your teeth at the patronising reminder to use his title, but aware that if you lashed out again it could result in him deciding to use the control chip. A chill rode your spine at the memory of the sheer amount of pain that one tiny button had triggered.  Fingertips brushed your spine and you flinched at first at the unexpected touch. Gradually relaxing as you realised that he was just petting you, stoking along your back like you would a cat.  

“Good girl, so you can follow orders.  Now be a good little solider and crawl to the bed.”

You turned to look at him in shocked defiance, ready to refuse until his hand dipped towards a pocket in his uniform.  Eyes widening and your mouth drying up in fear, your sense of self-preservation quickly winning compliance from you.  Waiting at the side of your cot bed for his next instruction, face red at the humiliation of the position. 

“Bend over the bed and lower your pants, you may remain kneeling.”  If this game was exciting him, his voice betrayed nothing.  You dared not betray how red your face was, by looking back to double check his body’s response.  Obeying as he continued in his monosyllabic tone, the words not the tone showing his displeasure at your attempt to hurt him. “Do not mistake this as the punishment for attacking me the other day, this is purely for today’s misdemeanour.”

His hand caressed your bottom, rubbing the palm of it softly against both cheeks.  Then digging each digit painfully into the right buttock and lifting it in his clawed grip.  He let go, drawing back the limb; and ready you tensed. Knees practically shaking as you worked out what was coming.  

 **Smack**.

He hit the left cheek hard, the flesh heating quickly to a sharp stinging burn.  He drew back to hit again, this time the right ass cheek.  You squealed in pain this time, biting into your wrist to stop the noise from being more obvious.  Ducking your face to hide it in the fold of your arms. Doing your best not to cry out, as he continued to rain blows onto your bottom.  You refused at first to let him see the tears that threatened to spill, choking back the sobs, until they won; and you could hide them no more.  Burring your face deeper, into your arms as you hiccupped at the force of his blows. 

That didn’t stop him, each blow landing somewhere new, and whilst you sobbed, you also congratulated yourself on not having begged him to stop.   Waiting for him to tire, relived when at the first signs of his exhaustion, he stood.  Trailing the backs of his fingertips over each tenderised cheek, before commanding you to kneel up.  Pulling your shoulders so that your bruised arse rested painfully, where it rubbed against the balls of your heels. “You may pull your pants up now, have we learnt something today?”

His fingers sought out your cheek.  Making you flinch for all their gentility, as they touched you. Brushing the hair back from your swollen and tear stained face.  You wouldn’t quite meet his eyes, you knew you looked a mess. Fresh tears forming as he forced you to meet his gaze, staring down at your puffy eyes.  You nodded, unable to control yourself long enough to speak, whilst you covered yourself back up.

“I don’t want you broken, my little soldier, though I may need to remould you to make you fit my plans for you.  For now, all I need is your loyalty and I can take that through fear if it is the only option left to me.”  You blinked in shock.  His admission; the small ray of hope that keeping you alive served a purpose for him, meant that you had a sliver of power.  Your body losing to your minds demands to rebel as a deathly cold wave shook you.  Shivering as violently at his suggestion that you would offer him anything but your hate, that your voice sounded weaker than you intended it to be. 

“I will never submit to you, or your kind.”

He laughed.  The same mocking lilt he had taken when he had brought you to orgasm in the chair.  It unnerved you more when he was anything but stoic; and this outright display of mirth at your discomfort had your shaking worsening.  Hux cupped your jaw turning you to face him.  Slipping his thumb over your bottom lip, pressing down your tongue, teeth chattering against it.  “That is the wrong answer my little soldier. You seem a little more helpless without your Zeltron traits to manipulate me, hmm?”

Your words where garbled, but you pushed their meaning at him, along with your verbal reply. Your mouth snarling around his digit, this time thankfully a little more aggressive; but not as much as you wanted.  “I do have force ones.” 

If your tongue hadn’t of been depressed under Hux’s tongue you would have bitten it.  It had been so long ago that you had all but forgotten it, but you had just perhaps made the biggest bluff of your life.  You could safely admit to having some training in the force, but not enough.  But surely, they wouldn’t know that, from Ren invading your mind?

“Yes, you do.” He seemed genuinely accepting of your bluff. But still stopped to consider your words before continuing, still smirking as he spoke. “But before you even try that, allow me to warn you.  Ren struggles to control me, and he is a much more powerful force wielder than you; he is actually trained.”

Yes, he did have a good estimation of the strength of your powers then. You looked defiantly at him.  You’d be dammed if he thought this petty display of brute strength would break you.  He raised an eyebrow, the only indication of a change in his demeanour, before he removed his belt.  You gulped, aware that for some reason, he was taking today as a personal insult against himself.  “Would you like to apologise my little solider; beg for me to stop?” He folded the belt hitting it against the palm of his hand. “No?”

He didn’t wait for a snarky comment, and to be fair you would have struggled to do so.  Your mouth dried up with fear, as he stood behind you once more.  The belt wrapping tight to your neck, both hands either side of it.  Bringing you sharply back, to lean against his upper thighs. 

You were not an idiot.  You knew from your past encounters, that violence metered out towards you, excited him; and that was what scared you.  So, you didn’t need the evidence now, twitching against the bottom of the crown of your head.  You closed your eyes against the repulsion.  Wondering if his own had taken on that black look, if his pupils had swallowed them whole again as they had the day you had tried to escape.  His voice came closer to your ear, dipped low enough that in another time and place it would have been classed as seductive.  

“Last chance.”  You jerked your head in refusal.  Clamping your teeth together, as your thighs mirrored the action.  The spanking had sadly already had your body betraying you, both the fear and arousal this man was causing, had made your panties wet. The slick material rubbing against you.  You wouldn’t let that show though, parting your thighs by millimetres.  Aware that once he knew, it would just give him more control over this situation.  The support his legs had offered was taken from you, as he took a step back.  

“Bend over.”

Your body automatically obeyed, stopping yourself at a sudden worry that you would appear too eager.  One way or another he would do this, so it was best to appear unwilling for the touches, but willing to get the punishment over.  The side of his booted foot found your ass. The sudden force of the kick he gave you, making your upper body jolt forwards.  He kicked you a further five times, each one a swift way of calming down his own aggression, before he trusted himself to touch you again.  His fingers wrapping the back of your neck, shoving you into the mattress uttering a sharp warning to; “know your place prisoner!” before he flicked his wrist, bringing the leather strap against your clothed ass.

You knew you should have taken it as a kindness that he allowed you to keep your bottoms on. For all the thin material offered little actual protection; the pants still hid the effects the pain was having on your body.  It still stung worse than a thousand insect bites.  Your renewed sobs turning to outright screams, echoing hollowly in the small bed chamber. 

Before long you where begging him to stop.  All pride gone as the pain consumed you, all thoughts on stopping him from hitting you again.  Unable to decide if this whipping was worse than the control chip, or not.

“Are you going to behave?”

Your words came out rushed plea to his question.  “Yes, please stop, please General, Sir.”

He seemed to like this one.  His smirk less vicious than others had been.  “Good, one more to go little soldier, then you will thank me for administering your correction.”

You nodded as you agreed.  Prepared to accede to any and all of his requests, if it would just make him stop.  Still screaming as the final blow came.  This time sweeping across your lower bottom, the tips of it catching up the underside of your buttocks.  Gasping for air, as he generously waited until you could breathe again for your apology.  Clearing his throat, when he wanted to make you aware that it was taking too long. 

Quickly you pushed your boneless legs from your cot side. Desperately turning with little grace to grasp at his lower leg, garbling out your apology.  You did your best to remain kneeling, but your weakened legs gave out on you.  Leaving you sprawled cowering beneath his feet, as you waited nervously to see if you had appeased.  Leaning over to him when he appeared not to be and kissing at his boots, in a sleep-deprived attempt at appeasement for your behaviour.

“You just cannot help yourself, can you?”

Hux bent over to grab the neck of your shirt dragging you by it to sprawl over the side of your bed. The distaste at your actions was obvious now. You blushed at the obvious sexual connotation; you hadn’t realised that he would take your actions as a further attempt at manipulating him.  You had just wanted to appear grateful. 

“I won’t, I didn’t, I don’t want.”  Even had you been able to get your words out right, you couldn’t quite work out what you had been trying to say.  You were fearful that you would further anger him; and his spankings with his hand and belt had been quite extensive.  His hands betraying the disgust in his voice and sliding under the grey dress you wore.  Dipping into the material at your waist and into your panties, pulling them down and exposing your cunt to him. 

“You were not trying to do what Private? Not trying to manipulate me into yet another compromising situation with you?”

You shook your head, this was unfair.  You both knew you couldn’t help your bodies’ natural reaction to what he had just put you through.  But this was not what you had been trying to do.  Yet your words still sounded hollow, even to you as you protested to both him and to yourself you weren’t lying. 

“That’s fear General and we both know it!”

“Is it?”

He palmed your bottom.  The smoothness of his glove soothing against the hot flesh, dipping around and under to cup your sex, rubbing the heel of his palm against your clit. 

“If it’s just fear then why are you practically riding my hand.”  You froze, you hadn’t realised you had moved.  His hand never letting up from the previous tempo, whilst you struggled to keep your breathing level calm.  Had you thought it wouldn’t betray your discomfort at his taunting, then you would have voiced your rejection of his claim.  In time he replaced his palm with fingers, swirling them around in some complicated pattern. Making it harder for you to resist the urge to moan out your approval.  Instead he murmured his own against your ear; “Such control soldier.”

When his fingers slid effortlessly inside you, you gave a small whine. His fingers scissoring and scooping, collecting wetness, before trailing them back to your tiny puckered arse hole.  That was going way too far; and panicked, jerking against the restraint he held on you. Fighting to get away from those fingers as he rubbed those slickened digits against it, tiny circles pressing against your natural resistance. Threatening, but not entering.   

“But far less so, when it comes to the unknown.” Despite the reflection, his voice held a minute amount of amusement at your predicament as he spoke.

Your struggles became more violent in their intensity, as he slid one finger inside you. The leather sinking past your ring of muscles, up to his final knuckle as he held it there, gripped tightly by your anal passage. 

“You’ve not done this before, have you.”  You shook your head at what he was implying, the fullness in your ass making your pussy clamp into nothingness.  Eliciting a mirroring of the ripple in your back passage.  The control it must have taken him to stop his voice from cracking as he spoke, was betrayed only by the breathlessness of the rise and fall of his chest behind yours, as he knelt behind you.

“Shall I take it, solider?” It was a genuine question; he wanted to do this. His finger languidly pumping your tight hole.  The seams on his glove sawing against the smooth lining. “Shall I make this hole mine?”  Beneath him you shook in both fear and desperation at his suggestion that he would degrade you more.  You hadn’t ever even had your own fingers inside you, the thought that it seemed a dirty pastime, always putting you off trying.  Now as spit dribbled to join the wetness that he had already placed there, you shocked yourself with a quiet mewl. Unsure if it was in pleasure or discomfort, as he slid an additional digit inside you.  His fingers working to stretch you almost to the point of pain. Gasping as he twisted his wrist, scissoring them to spread you open. 

“Please, don’t Sir, I, I,” You felt impossibly full, and the thought that any moment he would try to fit his cock in there awoke fresh struggles. He pulled both fingers from you cutting you off, as he pulled your torso back to his chest.  The smooth wool of his tunic, scratchy against the naked flesh of your tender bottom as he rutted against your crack.  Pulling apart the glowing globes to nestle the clothed mound of his cock between them. 

“General Hux, Sir please don’t”

You took a gamble, using his honorific had always seemed to appease him in the past; but your voice broke on the final word. A heartfelt plea spoken in earnest, to a man who you knew wouldn’t listen.  Hot, heavy, tears stroked your cheeks, splattering your chest as they fell in rivulets to bounce off your breasts. 

He wrapped one hand into your hair.  Pulling your chin up to display your openly weeping face to him, his eyes lit at the distress he could see there.  The other snaking over your hips, pulling you tighter against his rolling hips.  The normal sex you could handle, you had experienced that before and so knew what to expect.  This new torment he offered was unknown, he had been right you did fear the unknown; and with good reason.  Wasn’t this supposed to be painful, shameful?

His words were breathless, timed to his thrusts against you. “Without the correct lubrication, it would be too painful for both of us Private.”

You couldn’t help yourself.  You knew of only one way to get a handle on your fear and the cost that cocky attitude would have its own consequences. Your voice was full of distaste and sarcasm at his obvious concern for himself.  “You mean painful for you General.” 

“No, both of us.” His reply completely shocked you, but far less than your own body’s response at warming to the genuineness of his concern. “It’s not meant as a punishment, the sex a reward for you baring it.” His fingers left your scalp in an odd moment of tenderness, he tilted your chin towards him. Lips gentle and parted, his hips stilling.  “I don’t need you broken, just compliant.  You would enjoy it.”

You lost all control at that, your vision turning red, you allowed the heat of your anger to wash over you, screaming at him. “Enjoy what?! Being fucked by a Xenophobic murderer!? What is it supposed to be a huge honour, to take your fucking cock!?”

Jerking against him you stood briefly. Knocking him back and towering over him at first and you went to hit him. Raising your hand, until fear made you lower it.  Shuffling back as he rose like a leviathan from the floor.  

General Hux was not built up to a mass of muscles like Kylo Ren.  But something about the way he pounced at you, side swiping you to the floor terrified you.  Hux didn’t stop when you were down either, reigning kicks, then later on punches to your curled-up body.  His control lost as he took his temper out on your body.   

A clashing-bang alerted you to the opening door. From your prone form, you peered back through your fingers.  Kylo Ren stood there, his had outstretched at the now also prone form of Hux.  Pushing the General to stand with the force, his hand naturally finding itself around Hux’s throat.  His robes missing and his bottoms dishevelled by his haste to get here, his chest heaving, strained by his obvious exertions. 

Behind him stood what you guessed to be one of his knights, a curiously smaller and lither man.  His black mask trained firmly on you, rather than his masters who’s was firmly on Hux’s, his eyes dark with absolute fury as he spat out each warning. 

“We both agreed we would follow protocol, with this one.”

Ren looked back over his shoulder at you.  His gaze sweeping from your calves, to the bottom of his thighs where your knickers hung loosely across them.  You gathered from his scowl that the protocol in question, had been that neither of them were to touch you sexually. 

“I will not have you question my methods Ren, the girl is  ** _my_** prisoner, not yours.”   

Ren allowed Hux to slide from the wall, and the man tugged his clothing back into place.  Ignoring the purpling ring at his neck, to square up to Ren. If Kylo Ren was upset, he managed to keep it from his voice, moving to stand between you both.  An odd show of protection, from your most hated enemy.

“I am not questioning your methods General.  Look at her, you lost control.” Behind him you tried to stand.  Your movements causing sharpened pain to snake through your body.  Your ribs felt bruised, so you kept your breathing shallow. Holding onto your torso, whilst you slid across to crawl up over your bed. 

 “You are a fine one to talk about control Ren, don’t your knights preach a lack of it?”  The General was not going to back down to Ren.  Continuing to argue with the brunette, whilst you tried sitting on the mattress.  But each position just brought forth fresh pain from your ribs, your legs and your bottom; your muscles and skin too sore to bear anything touching it.  Instead you stood once more, pulling up your panties in an attempt at reclaiming your dignity,

The two men continued their pissing match and the third presence in the room, never took their eyes off you.  It had to be a trained defence mechanism you decided. The Knight of Ren would watch you whilst the Master displayed his vulnerable back to you. 

Hux stepped forwards to dodge around to you, and fearful that he would do you more damage, Ren moved to breach the gap.  

“No!”

The order came from the Knight by the door.  Though the vocoder on his mask hid most of the humanity, you gathered he was very young, and by his body language very upset at the General.  His now obvious youth would explain his skinny frame; the lack of any built up muscles, that his master openly displayed as proof of his training,

“You gave me your word that you would not touch her.”

“Why in all the known universe, would you think I would willingly put any part of myself, inside her for pleasure.” Hux openly sneered at the knight, his words dripping with distaste, at the Knights suggestion that he had been about to have sex with you. Your stomach flipping at his lie, choking back bile.  Both of you knew todays interaction had been heading that way for all he continued to protest his innocence.

“Come off it you two, we both know that for her to manipulate her pheromones like that, she must have been sexually attracted to me to begin with, to both of us.”  You had been.  A chill running your scalp, at him voicing what you both had known all of this time to be the truth.  It sickened you, that you could find a man, who committed genocide; who had subjected you to all of this attractive.  But not as much as the suggestion mean that you also must have found the man who had butchered your entire family, one way or another appealing. 

“But you were going to,” The smaller Knight stepped forward, his feet nimble in his progression towards Hux, and you realised that his movement, though smaller cleaner, than his Master would be, was still as dangerous. “Weren’t you, General.”

Kylo Ren’s brows raised at his knight’s admission, and you found it odd that the Knight had not been aware of your beating, or Hux’s treatment of you.  You felt hot and shaky at this farce.  The room swaying around you, beneath you, your gripped the cot sheets tighter, determined not to appear weak before your captors.  In front of you, the younger knight tilted back to look briefly at you, before returning his gaze to the General. 

Their stance was not lost to you, for all its reasoning was. Both knights stood ready to defend you, should they need to. It was bizarre that it had come to this, that you were being protected by your enemy.  Across from them Hux preened, his stance mirroring the knights’.  Making you wonder what was so important about you, that both men would actively go to war over you.  What did you have that was far more than anything you could have ever hoped to achieve by manipulation?  

“Ren, we both agreed that she would require this type of punishment.”

General Ren’s jaw clenched his reply carefully picked. “General, we also agreed, that should it need this level of punishment then we would both be present.  For the safety for all who are involved.”

“I know what is best for her Ren.”

Your guts gave up on you at this new knowledge. You had been foolishly wrong in your assumption that the Master of the Knights of Ren offered you any security.  Given the chance, would he too would do to you what Hux had tried to do? Of course he might, you were foolish to have ever given into the stupid hope that he wouldn’t. 

You heaved at the futility of your position.  Yellow bile spilling onto the white sheets, beneath you. The heaves straining your already bruised intercostal muscles and causing you to yelp in pain. 

At the first cry, all three men’s attention was turned back to you.  Three sets of hands hurried to reach you, all desperate to help you struggle off the bed. 

You evaded them all, twisting and ducking aside.  Falling onto your knees as you twisted in the sheets, too focused on your hurry to escape their attentions.  A crack sounded, and you shielded your wrist, as you shuffled back.  All previous pains now a close second, as you cradled the limp appendages; your wrist, you fingers; they shouldn’t have bended like that.

“Back off.”

The order came from the lesser knight; but surprisingly both the General and the Commander followed his orders. “She thinks you’re going to hurt her some more.” The Knight’s mask turned to Ren, and despite the vocoder, you could sense the desperation in his voice as he begged. “Please Master Ren you promised.” 

The master nodded at his apprentice, his face turning back to yours.  An arm outstretched, as he stalked forwards.  Fearful, you went to shuffle back; to get away from this approaching colossus, but your body locked into place. Whether frozen by fear or Force, you couldn’t quite tell, until he dipped his arm under your leg.  An overwhelming sense of languid tiredness, washing over you, as you fell back against the limb at your back. Your entire frame lifted against him, as he strode from the room with you pressed to his bare chest.       

 


	6. Fulcrum

You were back once more in the medibay. Kylo Ren had had you placed in the very same side room as the last time Hux’s temper had sent you here.  This time however, you were kept awake whilst the medics assessed your condition.  General Hux had broken bones this time, two of your ribs had cracked under his hissy fit and one was floating. The bruising around your eye was the definitive pattern of an orbital fracture and it hurt too much to talk.  Your fingers and wrist had been easier to mend, a simple case of putting them back into place before binding the bone together for support.  But the contusions and lacerations were going to take longer.

You hurt worse than the torture; aching all over.  Already the darkening marks were appearing over the green and yellow stains of the old bruises.  Butterfly clips held your skin together and for the first time, you were permitted bacta.

The younger knight had been to his annoyance sent away. Kylo Ren making promises that he would look after you for him.  Leaving you to wonder what the Knight’s interest in you could be; since everyone else in this installation had wanted the opposite for you. 

The medical team had, against your wishes; administered pain relief.  The drugs given often enough and of a high enough intensity, that they left you feeling lightheaded and woozy.  The very reason that you had not wanted them.  They left you disorientated; unable to properly concentrate on what was happening to you as you drifted in and out of sleep. 

“More bacta,” The Medic had wisely woken you before dispensing the injection, but he addressed the man in the corner and not you.  Kylo Ren seemed have taken his vow to his Knight seriously.  He had not left your side.  Not even when the drugs had made you vomit, splattering bright yellow bile onto his boots.  “it should lessen the healing time, on her ribs and of course, help to close up the lacerations.” You flinched as the medic injected close to your floating rib.  Suspecting that he had been deliberately as rough with the process as he would dare.  Remaining silent though as he finished up.  Dropping the used sharp into a metallic bowl and stripping his gloves, to leave you once more alone with Ren.

You wrinkled your nose at him; and you had vomited again over the side of the bed. Adding to the splatters he already wore from when he had carried you here.  Your head throbbing despite the pain, from Hux’s blows.  Oddly satisfied to see the evidence shine a brighter yellow in this white tilled room, as it stained his sur-coat.

“You should go change your robes, you stink.” That was a taunt, you knew he was going nowhere.  Still there was something about the knight that altered the playing pieces here.  So hurried to get you here, Ren hadn’t even stopped to grab his mask, before taking you to get medical attention.  Now his jaw set and he rolled his eyes at you, pointedly ignoring your jibe.  How annoying you thought, huffing at his refusal to bite, the deep breath you had drawn to do so waking fresh pain in your side, making you bark in pain and grit your teeth against it. 

Visibly alarmed; he called back the Medic, “She’s still in pain.”

The man stood practically shaking beneath the Knights towering frame; the fear in his voice clearly evident as he refused the unspoken request. “We cannot administer any more pain relief Commander.  The drugs will not completely stop the pain, unless we use none synthetic anaesthetics to knock her out, which is unadvisable given the head trauma.  There will still be some break though pain Sir, despite the meds.”

They spoke over you like you were a dog, both looking back at you.  Fearing that Kylo Ren would insist you were to be given more sedatives you shuffled back, curling your body as tightly around itself as the pain would permit.  Your drug addled brain making you forget the restraints at your wrist.

“No.” The Knight’s reply was succinct, and as Kylo Ren approached you the Medic took it as his chance to leave. Hurrying bunch-shouldered from the room. “You’re thirsty.” He held up a cup of water, and despite the cracks to your lips, you hesitated to take it from him.

“How, thoughtful of you.  In my mind again Ren?”

You spat out your reply as clearly as the drugs would allow you.  His name rolling off your tongue like it burned you, he was pure poison in your life right now. You couldn’t help but continue, as he calmly kept his offering raised to you.

“I know you will not believe this, but I am not the real enemy here.”

He ended it on you name, and it had been so long since you had heard your name spoken, not your number or the mocking pet names the General had given you; that it sounded odd. Displaced and rusty, you rolled it about in your head, reclaiming each syllable to make it yours once more. Sighing before continuing your taunt, the damage to your body, still not enough to make you hold your tongue.  

“So since you managed to avoid killing me as a child and saved me from General Hux, we should make a truce? I am assuming that you have decided on keeping me alive; yes? Or will we be trying for death again.” You paused to fight back a tickle in your throat and took the water from him. Swigging it back to calm your throat, freeing up your drying mouth, before continuing your little rant. “What is it Ren, do you have a master plan for me too? Should I be truly honoured if you too want to give me your fucking cock?”

Your voice had grown more aggressive, each syllable lounder than the last and for a slit second Kylo Ren actually looked shocked. Lost for words whilst his fists curled at his side into fists.  Fists that you know he would like to use on you, if only he get away with it.

“I can see why the General considers you a handful, your mouth is truly filthy.” The dry comment was a disappointment; you had wanted fire.  Still there was time. You smirked at him, or at least hoped that was what you were doing, your face felt more than a little numb.

“I can see your precious General finding anything he can’t control a handful.”

The man blinked for a moment, before throwing his head back in genuine mirth.  At first you assumed he was mocking your rant, until his eyes met yours. They danced with amusement as he chest rose and fell, his voice losing all of its serious edge. “Yes, I suppose he does,” he moved closer, lowering his voice almost conspiratorially. “but I somehow think he does not usually see anyone as a such a special case, as yourself.”

That hit the pit of your stomach with something you could not quite place. Heat threatening to kindle there and consume you.  Your lips curling back in a snarl, nervous that his suggestion that with General Hux you were more than just a First Order prisoner had been genuine.  Not thinking, before a small hopeless whisper left you. 

“What will you do with me?”

You had shown too weaker character for your liking in that question and realistically you knew that there was little chance of you being told.  Or that his plan for you had been any different to that of the Generals; but you still wanted to know. 

A chair guided by unseen hands slid towards you, and Ren sat himself down on it.  You looked up and across at him as he lowed himself to it. Ignoring the futile murderous sense of vengeance you felt you should act on at having him this close to you.  Even sat lower than you he was colossal, his shoulders level with your raised bed.  He lounged against the chair back, this more relaxed Ren making you nervous. 

“My plans; like General Hux’s, are irrelevant to those Leader Snoke has for you,” You shuddered at the mysterious First Order’s leader’s name. So little was known about him prior to your mission and those who did know of him in the Resistance, kept their secrets well. “however, we could start by unlearning some Resistance lies.”

You openly gawked at his words. Rolling your eyes and drawing in anger fuelled breaths to defend your beloved cause.  How dare he suggest that that righteous organisation was in the wrong.

“We can start first, with your assumption that I have  ** _ever_** tried to kill you.”  

 You closed your mouth against the heavy tirade you wanted to yell at him, your eyes still lit with fire at his lies. Arms folded across your chest as he continued, determined that you were not going to listen to anything you were told by this monster. You had no time for his lies; and he was wasting his breath on you.

 “I assure you it is not a lie.  Had anyone of us known who you were when we captured you, you would have had you treated very differently.”

“Get out of my mind Ren.”  Your voice dripped with all the icy fury that you could muster. Ren sighed in answer placing his head into his hands, rubbing his temples, before wearily continuing.

“I have not been in your mind since we dream shared.  Have you truly forgotten all of your training so quickly?”  You blinked at him.  This tired, genuinely curious Ren, so different from the one who had rode your mind whilst the General tortured you for hours.  Your brain brought forward a fresh resolve, you would still tell him nothing, you tightened your folded arms across your chest.  Childishly laying back, your mouth a firm line as you ignored him. 

It to your triumph riled him. His gigantic frame stiffening and hands thrown up and open in defeat as he stood almost walking away. Pausing on an afterthought.  “I didn’t think it could be possible, but you’re more infuriating than she is.  Wait there, I will have you discharged into my care.”

You hadn’t meant to even grant him a reply.  But you did your voice a churlish and panicked whine at what being left alone with him would do to you; what being alone with either one would mean.  

“I don’t want to be discharged into your care.  Just make up your minds, either kill me or let me go.  I will tell you nothing, I will give you nothing.  I am useless to you all.”

“No, you are not!”

He had returned. His hands hitting the bed either side of your head. His face so close to yours that for a moment you debated spitting at him.  Changing your mind at the last minute, the drugs suggesting to your easily influenced self, that it would be a good idea to repeatedly try and bite him. 

He jerked effortlessly back out of your reach.  Your teeth snapping against fresh air as you gave into animalistic fury, legs kicking, nails braking against the clasps on your restraints as you fought to open it. Desperate to cause him some form of damage.   You didn’t want to be alone with this murderer, he had killed your family, and done far worse to others.  He deserved only death.

 “Get a medic in here now!” That modulated voice had not been Ren. The smaller knight stood at the door, his chest heaving in exertion.  You gathered he had run here, supposedly frightened for his master’s safety.

The Master of the Knights of Ren stood to challenge the medics clustering at the doorway. Belaying his knight’s order and yelling back his own order.  “Get out! I told you to stay away, I will deal with this.”

It was a command, but the Knight ignored it.  Entering the room, the medics flanking him and kept behind the guarding reach of his sword arm.  Ren chose to momentarily ignore him, ordering for sedatives to be administered to you in an attempt to regain control of the situation. 

One of the medics drew up a syringe, struggling to get a clear shot at your moving limbs tried to inject you. Ren roaring out an order for them to hurry up.  Your wrist becoming bloody, both from the rubbing of your cuff and the rough biting of your teeth and nails against it as you fought to be free.  The medic crying out not a refusal, but a suggestion of failure.

“Sir, I can’t, she’s moving too much.”

Kylo Ren pulled out his sabre, sparks splattering your blanket as he activated. Holing it over your bed, to point in threateningly towards the grouped medical team. “I don’t care how unwise it would be to do this, either get that needle into her, or I will make sure this goes into you!”

Suddenly the apprentice knight seemed to animate himself.  Snatching the needle from the man and in one fluid movement nimbly swung onto the bed to pin you down.  His side pressed against yours, whilst he used his body weight to keep you in place.  He ignored the blows and scratches to his leather padded back, quickly plunging the needle through the material of your hospital gown, and into your upper arm.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He chanted through the vocoder, spinning around, to lay on the bed with you.  His hands stroking your head as you lay paralyzed by the sedative. Repeating his soothing mantra as the drugs took effect and you lost all consciousness.

You woke some time later still sobbing with the residue agitation; but confused as to your new surroundings.  You had been moved whilst still unconscious, the surroundings similar in their design to Hux’s quarters, yet terribly different in the harshness of their sparsity. The padded bed on which you were now laid atop of was much larger than the cot bed that Hux had given you and much more comfortable. 

You were covered up by a warm, softly woven blanket; but your clothing was again very different.  You panicked at that, wildly looking around you for clues as you realised you had been once again been stripped naked and changed by another stranger.

_“Don’t worry, it was I who changed your clothing.”_

 The voice was spoken inside your head and was strangely feminine.  Such an odd contrast to the masculine figure sat on the end of the bed. Faintly familiar not only in its tone; but resonating in your psyche; this voice had been here before.  

Either the residue from the drugs or Hux’s treatment of you, had left you with a pounding headache. Your muscles stiff and weak, as you rubbed your fingers into the crook of your neck to realise some of your tension.  You were sore everywhere and you wondered how long they had kept you unconscious this time.

“ _Not long, the soreness is left over from Hux’s beating.  Can you truly not remember anything of your past?”_ She, you assumed it was a she, sounded softly spoken and genuinely concerned at your lack of understanding.  Whomever she was, she wasn’t here when looked around the room for the source of the voice.  The Knight at your feet watching you constantly.  A sad laugh sounded in your head, before the voice continued to speak with you; this time an etching of distress hitting like shallow punches behind her words. ‘ _How much did Master Ren show you? How can you not remember who I am?’_

It was beginning to unnerve you, the voice sounded friendly, caring.  But that could be deceptive, this all seemed too sharp a contrast to the monsters whom you had so far dealt with in the First Order. You looked down at the sheet covering your knees.  Whomever she was, she had afforded you some respect in her clothing choices for you.  She had chosen clothing that for the first time in weeks covered you.  A light weight pair of soft lounge pants covered your entire legs, coupled with a matching loose fitting, long sleeved t-shirt.  The black clothing hanging loosely off what would have once been your curves, had you of been in better shape, then they wouldn’t have been so badly fitting. 

A moments panic struck you; both for her and yourself.  Should either men discover, she was treating you with respect, it would cause more complications and she could run the risk of punishment for providing clothing and a place of security. 

The real question, was who was this Knight who stood guard over you? So far he hadn’t hurt you; or realised that you had an ally.  But what would happen if he did and weak as you were right now, could you challenge him.   

There was a disappointed clucking in your head, and you looked around you for the source of the voice. Realising that if you could sense she was disappointed in you, then you were convinced she must be close.

Across from you the Knight shook his head; doubtless having sensed your thoughts.  You drew back defensively into a ball, fearful that he had discovered your hidden friend and that he was about to hurt you. Your ribs screaming in protest as you flinched, and you stiffened ready for the blow. Ducking your head as the knight lifted his hands; screwing your eyes closed in readiness for him to hit you too.

“Do you recognise me now.” You had been too lost in your own terror to hear the disengagement of the helmets air lock.  Now as you opened your eyes and looked over at the voices’ owner; you realised whom you had been talking with.  Without the deep scrambling of the mask’s vocoder, the voice was obviously delicate and female; almost identically matched the one inside your head.

She stood still, allowing you to look her over, your eyes mapping her features. She was familiar and yet, not; in fact, her eyes where similar in shape to yours. Thought the colour different.  The roundness of her chin and the shape of her brows curiously close to your own, for all there were obvious differences. Perhaps she was a distant relative you wondered.  Noting that her mouth was much fuller than yours and her complexion and hair colour very dissimilar to yours.  But there was something there; the ghost of a memory you couldn’t quite place. 

She shot you a sympathetic smile as your brows pulled tight together.  It was concerning, you knew at that, that you should be able to place.  It was her presence though, that upset you the most.  Knowing then that you should be able to place her; but you couldn’t place where you knew her from. 

She shot you another pity-filled look.  Reaching out towards you, to gently touch the back of your hand.  But unused to being treated with anything but contempt now, you jerked back from her.  Making her withdraw her hand in sympathy, leaving you saddened by the loss of contact, both of you frowning, as you looked at where she had touched.

“It’s your face.  Or would have been if they had not altered it.”

You knew she spoke the truth; the answer to where you knew her from hitting you like a freight train. Of course it had been; all three of you had been born identical.  You spoke her name voice crackling as you spoke a name so in frequently named, that it was old and disused on your tongue, yet so burningly familiar in the attachment it brought.

“Adrianna.”  

She nodded, a genuine but sad smile fleetingly brief as you both fell into silence. Broken only when your sense of preservation caught up with you and allowed you the meaning of her explanation.

“They?”  You had not realised that you had pushed your question at her, until she spoke back across the mind link.  Her voice so raw, naked in this form that you couldn’t mistake the truth in her words; explaining the part of the questions you had not spoken aloud. 

 " _Ren says that the New Republic forced them to change your faces.  Ren rescued me before they could change me, they split us, didn’t want to risk us remembering each other in case we were found.  They lied to you; we never perished, all of us survived the crash.’"_

She pushed forwards a memory at you with her explanation; her own version of the last ten years.  It seemed neither she, nor Ren had been lying about what had happened the night your parents had died.  The intention honestly, had never been to kill you.  It showed Ren discovering her, having been deposited miles from the ship’s wreckage, cradling her small body until the life support unit arrived.  The memory of the months of rehabilitation as he showed her fragile body how to work again. Then the years of force training, that he had given her.  The honour she had felt, when she was powerful enough, that Ren named her his second in command.

“Very different from the monster the Resistance painted him as, isn’t he?”

She had nothing but bitterness and contempt in her tone for the Resistance.  But you couldn’t remember them ever having altered you.  But if they had not then you would both still look alike to one another.  You frowned, aware that for her to have seen how you felt about the First Order and Kylo Ren, then she must have been searching your memories, worrying you at what else she could have learnt so quickly.   

“No, it’s not like that.” She spoke with honest passion, holding her hands up, palms facing you in defence.  But you had truly had enough of people robbing your mind for information, things that you didn’t want to share that you could not accept her honesty quite yet.

“What is it like then?”

“You project those thoughts at me, you’ve forgotten how to hide them from me.  But I can teach you.  It’s how I knew Hux was attacking you, I called Master Ren for help.  I could sense what he did to you, and we’re sorry.  The entire First Order is, if they had known who you are, then none of this would have ever happened to you”

“No, but you’d have still done it to the next poor sod!”

It had happened though; and it would have happened to another had it not been yourself.  It sickened you and you were disgusted at her obvious admiration. The loyalty to a man who had tortured you, physically and emotionally; a man who had still been responsible for the deaths of so many.

“Isn’t that what happens in war? Can you say your Resistance would have been any kinder, if instead they caught me?  Perhaps they would not have been any different. You yourself, knew that you would have stopped at nothing to get the information you needed to escape.  There was far too much at stake in this galactic war, for you to risk niceties.  If she had of carried something as important as you did, then your superiors; they would have stopped at nothing, sunk just as low to get that information off her.

“I was off the base.  Master Ren summoned me the minute he realised who you were.  They promise you will be safe now, whatever your decision.”  Her voice was just as gentle as she continued, something in it, easing your previous worry. Making you shudder as the tension left your body, choking back tears that were perhaps tinged faintly with relief.  Aware through the slowly repairing bond, that she had offered you not only a choice, but a friend. 

She had leapt forwards to grab you, just a fraction of a click before your first sob broke.  Cradling you as you wept noisily, allowing all that had befallen you to pass over the bond.  She shuddered as the memories where deposited, and you were aware through the link as she shushed you, stroking back your hair that she felt everything.  When she told you she understood, she truly meant she did.  Not just comprehending her sympathy; but that she felt for herself your own self-loathing and revulsion, at the two men, at your own body’s betrayal.

“They have both given me their words, that they will not touch you again.  No one will.”

“But neither will they let me go.” You punctuated through your broken sobs.  Knowing for all her fierceness, that you would never be permitted to leave.

“No,” She shook her head, genuinely saddened by her admission. “but you will be kept not as much a prisoner, but an honoured guest.  That is, assuming you would want to leave me.”         

You rubbed your face, patting around you for something to wipe your snotty and tearstained face on.  Your sister stood, returning momentarily with some wipes for your face, blowing your nose, it finally hitting you; this was _your sister._

You gave a small laugh; the first honest one you had done in weeks.  She smiled fondly down at you, her hands reaching for both of yours, dragging you up into a much-needed bearhug.  You clamped your arms around her, aware that even if she was the enemy, she was still your family.  Family, now there was another term you hadn’t heard in a while, she laughed with you at this self-realisation. You had found a piece of your missing past; you had not lost everything.

“You’re hungry, and to be honest you smell.  Let’s get you in a shower.”  You laughed at her honesty. Pushing aside the embarrassment that she could sense both your unease at being dirty and your hunger. It felt like so long ago since you had last had a shower.  She led you by both hands into a large marbled shower unit, switching various leavers.  Leaving you alone for the first time in what seemed to be forever.  

You couldn’t remember how long it had been since you hadn’t showered or bathed without Hux present.  He had appeared daily to force you to strip, cold blue eyes scrutinizing you as you had washed in his refresher.  He had also insisted on shaving you personally, paying particular attention to your intimate areas.  It may have been to refuse you to handle a potential weapon; but had always felt so invasive.  Surely, he could have just let you not remove your hair than risk you handle a blade, especially the hair guarding your sex.  Whilst he hadn’t ever you injured you, never once breaking skin.  The fear of him cutting you had always been there; and that fear was most likely why he used an unguarded blade on your skin. Anything to keep you on your toes and in your place.        

You finished your personal care, wrapping the warm fluffy towel around yourself.  Oddly having decided to use the fresh safety blade to remove the stubble forming everywhere he had previously shaved you.  Applying the scented moisturiser, she had left to use on your chapped skin. You had lost so much weight, the imprisonment leaving your body far gaunter than when you had left on your mission.  The steam had fogged the mirror, and you lifted a corner of the towel to rub the silver glass dry, staring bemused at the haunted figure it held.  Your face and shoulders were a mass of purple and red welts, that trailed further down your body, the new bruises bleeding into the very occasional yellow mark.  Your cheek and lip split in places from when he had slapped it, again. 

Hux had littered your skin with his marks, reminders of what he had done to you, reminders of how your body had reacted to his touch. He had beaten you; and not just physically this time.  The weeks of mental, and physical torture were nothing to the pain you had felt at what he had yelled at Ren about you during your last beating.  He was right, and you sank to your knees in anguish at this new level of torment.  You had felt something when Hux touched you, and despite your refusal to accept it before, you knew he was right.  It weighed heavy, an iron weight at your heart.  You had often accepted that the pheromones could be produced only by attraction, yes it could be done purely on a physical level, that was what you had done with Ren.  But with Hux, it had been more, it made his attraction to you harder to resist, yours had been deeper with him.  Not a romantic attachment, you hated everything he stood for too much, but it was still an emotional one.  And despite your struggles against him, you probably would have submitted to him fucking you.  You hit your fist on the floor, as you lay curled up there, punishing yourself for your attraction to your enemy. Unable to understand where it had come from; and how it was this strong.

She came to stop you hurting yourself, but you were too strong.  Across the force bond she forced you to accept her love for you, trying to make you replace your own self-loathing with it.  But you were too disgusted with yourself to accept anything she could give you. Pushing against her, trying to make her let you go; wanting to be left alone to your misery.  She held you close to her throughout your struggles.  Waiting until you had exhausted yourself before trying to help you to the bed.  Ignoring your feeble pushes to escape the unwanted, underserved affection. 

You were weak, your body weight a fraction of your former size, easy for her to fight off; but still not light enough to carry, she couldn’t lift you. So instead that familiar black clad presence appeared and between them they kept you covered by the towel. Then he lifted you for her.

You stiffened as he cradled you against his chest, carrying you into the bedroom, bundling you into the bedding, wrapping the fluffy layers around you and building a fort against the world.  You nestled deeper, ignoring your damp hair as it soaked through the pillow.  They sat down, each at a different side of you.  Her at your face, him at your back, and you finally let her opinion of him override your own repugnance of the Jedi Killer.  She shushed at your residue spasms, and you were amazed your body could offer more protests in this terribly exhausted state.         

“You should eat.”  Her soothing, brought you back to your surroundings, Ren must have left the bed at some point, since he now held out a small tray to Adrianna. She took it from him placing it on a low table next to you, before she helped you to rise to a seated position.

You clutched the coverlet to your bare breasts.  Holding them in place with one arm, as you reached for the steaming mug.  Holding it precariously in your hands to avoid knocking it against your damaged fingers.  You wanted to bring it to your lips, your stomach growled for the thin soup it contained, but you couldn’t bring yourself to drink it.  Instead you replaced it, rolling back over onto your side; desperate to be left to just sleep.

“Please, you need to eat something.” She pleaded with you and tried again. This time, pressing a dry cracker into your hand, pushing it to your mouth.  You took the tiniest of nibbles, chewing it more thoroughly than the brittle biscuit required; struggling to swallow it.  You ate it all as a compromise, refusing further nutrition despite your sisters’ gentle encouragement. Choosing instead to once more bury yourself under the blankets and sleep. 

You drifted in and out of fractured sleep; your dreams surreal and very vivid, both from your fragile state and the drugs leaving your system. 

‘ _You dreamt for the first time since capture of your rescuer.  Taking comfort in the strength of her arms as they wrapped around you.  You appeared in this dream as the small broken child she had found the day she had rescued you from the crashed freighter.  Hiccupping as she lifted you onto her lap, wiped your tears as she gently rocked you, ran fingers soothingly over your scalp._

_“They know your alive.  Hold strong, you can do this.”_

  _A tingling began at the base of your spine, and you knew a moment of pure, abject terror as a second, then a third figure joined your dream.  Both clad in black, the second one the tall figure of Kylo Ren, the first the softer figure of your sister._

_You were lifted from your protectors’ lap, and she stood, placing herself between you and the approaching black menace.  You could sense his fear of her as he approached, they were old adversaries, both aware of what the other could do.  But she was older, far more disciplined, far more powerful here than he could ever hope to be._

_She held out a hand to him, pushing him back, and he sank to his knees under the weight of her Force shove.  She pushed again, and he dematerialised; disappearing from your dream and leaving just the three of you.  She turned to your sister, speaking her name in a simple greeting, allowing her to stay as she assured you not to panic._

  _“You have not given me away; I have chosen to let him see me.  Let them see who protects you.  Do not let yourself be seduced easily, hold fast to your beliefs.”_

_The dream was fading fast; she spoke again to you a warning of sorts to look for something.  But you couldn’t make out her words, her hands reaching for you trying to anchor you here. The last word shoved into your mind, a force command to look to ‘ **Search**.’_

They both hovered over you as you woke, and you shrunk yourself into a tight ball.  Ren looking wide eyed, for the first time terrified at you, as he stepped back.  Adrianna reaching to reassure you as he yelled at you, his voice breaking in terror.

“Her! She’s supposed to be long dead!”

You sensed something else as he fled, anger, betrayal. Leaving you alone to dress before, answering your sisters questioning.  Forgetting that there had been a force command to look for something.

         

 

 

 


	7. Dustoff

Her touch against your mind her brought the fresh resolve needed to fight; it had stripped your current fear of Kylo Ren from you.  Even if it wasn’t you who had directly caused it; you couldn’t help but feel a sense of gleeful pride at his terror. He now knew who had been the one to sheltered you for those remaining early years.  So he knew exactly who would be organising your rescue mission; and smirking, you revelled in his fear of her.  Emblazoned by his reaction, you screamed like a hellion at him; your triumphant defiance at the First Order renewing your sassy temperament as he all but fled the room.  You held nothing back, reaching for the tray throwing it and its contents at him as he slipped through the door. But your glory at his defeat faded quickly when left alone with Adrianna.

At first you had seen her debating over following him.  Pausing unhappily at the bedroom door; torn between her need to follow her Master; and her desire to stay here with you.  In the end though, she had remained.  Though from the odd cant of her head as she waited to see if you would calm down, you wondered if Ren had used telepathy to order her to stay put.  Instructing her to act both as guard and spy to you.  The instinctual desire to be still seen as favourable in your sister’s eyes though, reminded you to be careful. That she could not understand your need to return to the Resistance or your abject hate for her master. But you just could not understand her devotion to a regime that committed genocide; so the empathy she had for this thing, this creature, you wouldn’t call him human, that too was well beyond the limits of your compassion. Yet she was the one to speak first, her challenge preceding your own. 

“Who is she?”

Her master had fled the room, ran at the mere ethereal spectre of your guardians’ dream-self and so the only logical thought process was for her to be fearful. What threatened one knight threatened them all.  You could taste Adrianna’s worry and it carried strongly into her voice; the tremble as she demanded answers telling you everything. Her dread hung as heavily from her as it had Kylo Ren; separating you both from one another like a heavy iron curtain. 

“You let him in! Why!?”

It was your anger too that had won out, livid with her betrayal of you. Kylo Ren might not have even bothered trying to see that dream, had Adrianna not shown some private interest in it.  Her actions cut deep into already fragile scar tissue. You wondered if she had chosen to do this deliberately, leaving you with nothing you could keep private from him.  You had been told not to worry; but that was no longer your old worry.  If Adrianna had led him so easily into this dream sharing; what else could she inadvertently betray about you.  Would she be able to succeed where Ren had not, and find what you carried? How many more of your secrets could she expose to the First Order.  

 “He is trying to protect you for me, can’t you see it? He saved you from Hux, what he was about to do to you; can’t you see he is good?”

It broke your heart to have found her, and then be arguing like this; but you could not back down.  What had happened to you was too horrendous for forgiveness.  But this chaos was not conducive to finding an answer to how you were going to escape.  Taking a deep breath, you centred yourself.  Reasoning that you at least had been taught better than this; and would behave as such.  That despite declining the formal training you had been offered; there were still benefits to being Force-sensitive.  Even if you were not Force-adept; you could still be better than she was. Neither of you was going to back down.  Both of you arguing your different views.  You adamant that Ren had no need to protect you from the woman who had to finish raising you, because he had destroyed everything. The woman who had sheltered you; given you a family and a purpose once more.  Adrianna screaming her constant demands to know who she was, exhausting yourselves over the argument.  

 “Her name is Ahsoka Tano.  She was the woman who found me when we crashed on Nyriaan.”

You already knew that it had been pointless not telling her; after all Ren himself knew.  Naming her could do no more damage to your situation.  Kylo Ren would possibly tell her anyway so surely it was better for her to hear it from you; before he could turn any of this to his own personal agenda.  Now the connection between the two Jedi, even if made by Ren wouldn’t matter.  Only two people could open the information stored in you. The woman who had programmed you with the information and set you off to carry it; and the newly discovered Luke Skywalker.  The supposed final recipient; the person your final contact with the Resistance was supposed to lead you to. 

 “He’s frightened of her, isn’t he; is it because she’s not human?”

You could not believe this was coming out of another sentient human’s mouth. Disgust making you roll your eyes and sigh before you could continue. “Not being an actual human doesn’t make someone wrong Adrianna; what the hell have they been teaching you?  Kylo Ren is frightened because Ahsoka Tano was Anakin Skywalkers’ apprentice.  She is; well she was, a powerful Jedi.”

That seemed to leave her gobsmacked. Her mouth agape as she took the time to process it all, still unable to fully accept your words when she could speak again.

“A Jedi, but they’re all gone.”

You shook your head; the Jedi had never all been gone, just the order.  Master Skywalker had intended on your generation being the one’s to usher in a new order; and your family had been heavily involved with that long-forgotten daydream.  But even so, it was always suspected that there had to be far more force sensitives.  That eventually the others in hiding, would join you.

 “Look you remember who Ren was, you remember the boy, Ben Solo?”  She nodded and you steadied yourself; ready for the worst.  She wasn’t going to like this, nobody ever liked hearing this one and already it had been exhausting.

You rubbed your eyes, you had been running on adrenaline, and your body’s scant reserves for weeks.  This fight was taking so much out of you, emotionally, and physically.  You needed to explain but there was so much, years of information to pass over and you didn’t want all of it getting back to Ren; so you would go with just the bare minimum.  

 

 

“His Grandfather was Darth Vader, the man whom did not kill Anakin Skywalker; but the man whom he became.  Ahsoka was Anakin Skywalkers apprentice until she left the jedi order and possibly one of the few people he was rumoured to have refused to kill.”

She sat down with you, slowly taking it all in but her curiosity making her calmer. It had been difficult to keep the ire out of your words as you spoke to her, desperate for her to understand your concerns.

“Is that why the First Order is forbidden from using his birth name, the connections to the Jedi Order, to the old ways?”

You nodded and sighed. Amazed that she never thought to question Ben’s name change, or where it had come from.  Refusing to give up on the small string of hope that she could be made to see sense.  “Adrianna, how can you blindly follow a man who keeps so many secrets from you?” 

“I do not blindly follow anyone, have you forgotten he was my saviour, just as much as this  _Ahsoka_ , was yours?” 

 

You had perhaps been too short with her, but for her to speak that way about woman who had been your surrogate mother, made your hackles rise ready in challenge.  You’d finally had it with it her and her blind devotion to a man who was clearly using her for her force power. You spoke now honestly not caring that everything you said to her would probably be repeated back to Ren.  On the contrary you hoped your opinion of him would be reiterated to him. Perhaps if you were fortunate then he was listening now, then he would know exactly what you thought of his offer to stay here as his guest.  

“Adrianna, he is a monster! How can even stand to look at him, he killed our parents, butchered our brother, and that’s not to mention what happened to Keeva.  Or have you forgotten your other sister? She’s missing because of him, if not dead somewhere in an unmarked grave!”

Her eyes narrowed in warning and her tone dropped, both at your assault on her precious Master Ren and the suggestion that her sister was gone.

“We would know if she was dead.  We just don’t know where she is; but we can find her.  After the lies they’ve spun you, the Resistance most probably has her and has been hiding her from us.”

You couldn’t believe her, this subjugation to Ren was too much to bare.  Neither of you owed him anything.  He had been the cause of the crash, damaging it when he had pulled back the shuttle.  If he had really meant you no harm; then he would have just let you go and bargained for your help when you were older, not slaughtered your family like helpless nerfs.

 “I am the Resistance Adrianna, I would know if she was there; but we know nothing about her whereabouts; and that’s the point!  All we know for definite, was that our parents died to keep us away from that man!  The man whom you now blindly follow.” 

“Our parents they were Sith, don’t you get it, we could never have been the innocent party. They agreed to revolt with Master Ren, they agreed to join him, to help.  They refused to join him and the Knights of Ren at the last minute.”

Your eyes grew wide at this; not only was that was simply not true, it was also irrelevant to the argument.  You had all been children for heaven’s sake, how could you have ever been responsible. Nor were any of the others ever going to be guilty enough, to be charged with accomplishment to the genocide of the new Jedi Order.  She was blinded by her fear and you needed her to see sense, to listen to your reasoning. 

You paused in your thoughts, so much didn’t add up about her story.  She claimed that your parents would have willingly joined the purging of the New Jedi Temple.  But you couldn’t see them willingly slaughtering potential force users.  Your parents had run together, one Master and the other Padawan in the early days after Order 66, had been executed.  Eventually falling in love and forsaking their Jedi code.  Then their fear for their child’s safety had led them to the Dark-side. Your brother had been born whilst in exile, you three, you had come a little later in life. It was their drive to protect, that drove them further away from the Jedi path.  The Dark side was far easier to master; and so, it had kept them safe until after the battle of Endor. After that many Jedi had come out of hiding to join the New Jedi Order, to assist in its infancy.  Not all, of course, or else Ren would have known about the woman who finally raised you.  But you parents had conceived you three then.  Their reasoning to Master Luke, was that producing Force-adept children was essential to continuation of the Jedi Order.

She also claimed you had been surgically altered.  But you had no memory of that ever happening, or a likely event where it could have happened.  But your sister wasn’t lying in her belief that you she wore the face you should have; and somehow deep down you knew that she was right.  Aside from the subtle differences time would have wrought, hers was how yours should have looked.

 _‘Let him show you, please he doesn’t lie, they betrayed him.’_   Her re-emergence in your mind caught you off guard, but it was easier for you to realise that she considered this easier. You could see when she opened herself up to you, that she wasn’t lying to you.  _‘We were promised to his order, all of us.  Even then the New Republic was corrupt, the New Jedi Order followed it in blind devotion.  We risked making the same mistakes as the Old Order, it had to be done, no one would listen.’_ Her devotion to Ren was absolute in its blindness, there was almost no way of shaking her from the path that had been chosen for her.  But you could show her how even with the best of intentions, her master too was corrupt.    

 

‘ _He killed his own Father, Adrianna.  There is no honour in him, he does nothing that doesn’t share his own vile agenda.’_

 

It was there, painted between the cracks in her devotion, binding them closed.  The cement that closed the gaps in her belief; she loved him.  Her head hung, and you sensed her shame at you knowing, she had kept it to herself for so long. ‘ _He saved me!’_

She didn’t mean that he had saved her as a child.  Her devotion came from foolish sentiment; Kylo Ren truly was exploiting her for his own use. After s long in your head, her spoken voice seemed almost too loud.

 

“He doesn’t know; you mustn’t tell him ever.”  You looked on at her in honest amazement at her stupidity.  If you knew; then he had to know.  He was a powerful force user; and failing that he was human; surely it had to be this obvious to him too.

 

Adrianna kept pleading with you not to tell him, clearly more than just embarrassed at the thought of him finding out. You could sense she was afraid too. Whilst you wanted to play on that fear; you also needed her to see that you cared for her.  You had only just found her, and already she was slipping through your grasp.  How could she have fallen in love with the one person you abjectly hated. A man with enough Force-power to crack open minds, then assume he honestly didn’t know. 

“I won’t tell him Adrianna, but that isn’t to say he won’t find out if he looks.”

“You remember how to put up your walls, yes?”

You shook your head, gritting your teeth and rolling your eyes; was blood really thicker than water?

“No, I can maintain one someone puts in place, but I can’t erect my own, I didn’t learn and besides he would just assume I was hiding something important from him, it wouldn’t work.”

She pursed her lips, eyes narrowing at you. “Did you learn nothing under this great jedi? Look, I can teach you. It might not work if he pushes against them, but he has no reason to search for this information, no reason not to trust me.”

It was so obvious in her reply; she would betray him by teaching you this that you knew she had not his permission to teach you anything.  That her desperation at not being found out by him was such, that she would make this compromise.  She would teach you to put up walls; but to ease her guilt, she would not show you how to make them strong enough to defeat her Master. She was still firmly his creature.  

 “Come, sit down.  You remember how to meditate don’t you?”

She took a deep breath sighing, as she moved to the floor to sit crossed legged, patting the space opposite her, as an invitation to join her.  You followed her example on the floor opposite, not happy about this; but also, careful not to refuse her. 

You had chosen not to continue your training all those years ago for a reason; and had not wanted to start now.  You guardian had accepted this had although she taught you some useful techniques; she taught you nothing that would infringe on your rights. 

“It’s simple, all you have to do is imagine the thought you wish to hide, then imagine building a wall around it, give it a go.”

She closed her eyes palms up, and you mirrored her, relaxing as she guided you.    You had avoided this one, it needed a higher level of telekinesis than you were adept at.  But then there had been no urgency in learning. The walls that Ahsoka had put up for you, were more than sufficient. But now with this change of circumstances, it would be best to play along; more knowledge would be safer than non and so you shut your own eyes.  Breathing deeply and remembering from your training as a youngling how to force yourself to calmness.  Concentrating on her suggestion that you learnt this now to protect her.  Knowing that the real reason you needed these walls building, was to protect yourself. 

‘ _Protect yourself from what? I have told you, you are safe here, no one will hurt you anymore.  Master Ren gave his word.’_

You were derisive; if you were both so safe, then why was she so frightened of Ren finding out that she attached anymore feelings to him, then should have been proper for an apprentice and master? You sensed it then, before her reply.  Her fear came from rejection and something else, a fear of reprisal for having formed such guilty sentiments. 

 

‘ _Why would he reject you, are attachments forbidden in your Order of Ren also?’_ There was a moments pause, another sense of guilt before she would continue. Her reason giving you far more ammunition to use, than you could have ever created on your own. 

 

_‘No, Supreme Leader is not so stupid.  Not only it is imperative we produce more force sensitives, to continue the First Orders Legacy, but you mistake sentiment with passion.  No, it is because Hux would forbid it, if I survived long enough to offer myself to him.’_

That was unexpected; and completely suspect. You frowned at this new bit of information, the bond echoing your puzzlement so strongly that Adrianna sought to explain for you. 

 

 _‘Him and Hux are lovers, couldn’t you guess?’_ Your bowels turned to ice at the suggestion that the General and Commander were intimate.  The information flitting guiltily across the bond quicker than you intended, too quick to stop your own feelings from being shared.  You now knew now the real reason why Hux had been so upset when he had found Kylo alone with you, why he insisted on you being his prisoner, why you were never let out of his sight.  General Hux feared the possibility of Kylo forming alternative attachments; and that showed that your attempts to divide were working. 

 

 _‘That’s impossible, Hux would never allow it.  For himself, yes but not Lord Ren, he is devoted to Hux.’_   She had practically screamed that last thought into your mind ans so you opened your eyes; both of you looking at one another. 

 

She knew of course that both men may have been intimate with you; but you hadn’t stopped to share the exact details.  Too ashamed to think about it graphically, all you had wanted her to know was that you had been tortured.  Not wanting her to see what you had lowered yourself to; how desperate you were in your attempts at escape.   

 

But now you had let her know it had been sexual at times. Meaning that this new information fed back to her, shaking her steadfast belief, that the Knight had genuinely preferred men. 

“That’s impossible.” She yelled again as she realised the truth, quickly standing to face you.  “He’s said himself, he has never been with a woman, nor ever wanted to; what did you do to him?!”

You both knew that she only fooled herself; that there was no way in that sharing that either you could have lied from your own perspectives.  The bond when opened to one another like that, shared everything; all facts and emotions.  You tried resending the memories, not to hurt her, but to make her understand rather than hate you.  It was imperative that she believed you. She was supposed to have told you that it wasn’t your fault, that you had done what you had to do to survive.  Instead she rounded on you again, her walls slamming up quickly, leaving your reeling as the bond closed.

“How is what you did to them, any better than their treatment of you?!” She was backing off as she yelled, storming towards the entry door and hand reaching for the control panel. 

Desperately you pleaded with her to stay and to not leave you alone again, then stupidly for her to forgive you.  Clutching at her only to be pushed aside and to the floor.  “Keep away from me and stop playing the victim. They appear to have done nothing that you didn’t ask for.”

You were left gasping for air as she left, the door sealing you into the room.  Your body wreaked with shuddering tearless sobs, that meant that you couldn’t breathe. It felt like you had been punched, your body going into a state of panic. Your chest heaving with surges of liquid-fire at her words. Your heart pounding so loudly in your chest, that you could hear it in your ears.  You wanted to die at her abandonment and yet you would not give Ren the satisfaction.  

With her, your last and only protection against these men disappeared. Worse she had been in your head, if she didn’t believe you hadn’t wanted any of it to happen, then who would.  You couldn’t expect the Resistance to believe you, if your own flesh and blood didn’t; what if they saw you as compromised? 

The room spun, and you felt sick. Mouth dry, you shakily tried to make it back to the refresher; you needed water, anything to help cool you down and let you think. You made it to the sink. Shivering violently as you tried to turn on the taps, unable to recall what the temperatures were.  Skin prickling and your body, both burning hot and freezing cold.  Cold itchy sweat drenched you all over, making the glass slip from your hands as you held it under the running water. 

It shattered, and in your delirium, you tried desperately to pick up the shards of it. Trying to move them safely out of the way, so that you could drink from the tap instead.  Slitting the palm of your hand open in the process.  You were far from squeamish.  But the sight of the open wound, of your blood, on top of everything made you woozy.  Your legs buckling under you, eventually giving out. 

You would have fallen then, if strong leather clad hands hadn’t of caught you.  The Jedi-killer had returned, his cloaked presence adding another layer to your panic attack. 

He stroked your face, tossing aside his helmet, to look down at you, through sorrow filled, honey-dark eyes.  Placing your own hand against your chest, enabling you to feel the rise and fall of your lungs.  His voice instructing you to breathe, to feel the rise and fall as your body successfully took in air. 

It wasn’t working and your mouth was still so dry. Sensing you still needed water, he stood. Lifting you with him and pining you between himself and the sink, using his leather clad hands to try and cup water into you.

It didn’t work.  The angle was all wrong and your mouth was unable to steady itself around the tap to drink.  In his growing panic, Ren placed you on the floor.  Your legs too rubber-like to take your weight. Frantically turning to try and paw you some water.

You hadn’t noticed the other man had entered the room, until he calmly stepped forwards. Snapped authorative commands, ordering Ren to stand you up and to lift your chin up to him; to steady you.  

Ren did; supporting you from behind as Hux stooped over to the sink.  He took a mouthful from the tap, then a half-step forwards, tilting his head to dribble the cold water into your open and very waiting mouth.  It was messy, water spilling over your chin, but it was the most effective method. Blue eyes waiting whilst you swallowed, calmly turning back around to the sink and Hux repeated the process; only this time his lips sealed to yours. Creating a more efficient passage of fluids into your mouth. 

You swallowed, his lips moulded to yours; and far softer than you had realised. Your breathing settling into a heavy rhythm, whilst the tempo of your heart now beat fast for another reason.  He repeated the action a further two times, each time watching to make sure you swallowed before he pulled away.  Waiting until you declined the third mouthful, which he instead swallowed. His lips shiny from the water and perhaps your shared saliva, taking hold of both your arms and pulling you suddenly forwards.   Careful not to touch your bloodied hand, as he moved you swiftly from Ren’s hold to his.  

Finding that you could stand if you leant against him, he reached for a wash cloth.  Wrapping the synth-cloth around the cut in your hand and using it as a makeshift bandage.  His arm then hooked under your legs and the other supported your lower back as he lifted you to carry you from the room.  

Hux ignored Ren’s protests. His footsteps drowning out the Knight’s small paddy that he insisted that you stay here with him, in his quarters. His face serine as instead he kept on with his procession through the mans’ living quarters and out into the corridor. It was slightly surreal to be escorted so securely through what had always been a torture process in its self. The troopers and petty officers, that would have before tormented you, stepping aside to let their General pass.  Ren still following behind and arguing that you were his responsibility; that he had promised his knight to keep you safe.

You shuddered in the General’s arms for a moment at that, unsure if for a moment the Generals’ grip on you stiffened.  Did he really fear that Ren actually did want you; and would that mean he would hand you over?  Hux paused for a moment, looking down at you and offering you the choice of which man to stay with. 

Carefully, you studied his face, searching for any clue in his offer to let you choose your prison.  But if there was a hidden meaning you couldn’t find it behind the icy-blue stare.  So you hid your face in his neck, wrapping your arms around him in a definitive gesture to remain with him.  You would much rather take your chances with General Hux, than with Kylo Ren. 

A hiss and you dug your face deeper into his neck, wincing at the activation of the Commanders’ sabre.  Flinching as you heard it grate, as he hit the durasteel walls.  Holding your breath like your eyes closed to the smell of molten metal.  


	8. Reconnaissance

Even once you reached his quarters, he refused let you go.  Holding onto you, until he reached his bedroom and depositing your now violently shivering form, onto the end of his meticulously made bed.  Your body just couldn’t control its temperature; and nor would it shut down to let you sleep off your exhaustion. You were so weary; the panic attack you’d suffered, followed by the stress of Ren’s argument with Hux, had left you beyond tired.  On top of that you’d been deserted, by your newly found sister and your pride meant that you wouldn’t be begging her for forgiveness.   

The exchange between Ren and Hux had been odd, even for them, it confused you how they had bickered in front of you, knowing you would use that against them. Not as much as it was unnerving to you, that you didn’t quite know what each man wanted from you.  Despite the arguments they seemed to have around you, it was impossible for you to make out any personal plans concerning you. They were becoming increasingly hard to predict and with the spark of hope that came with Adrianna disappearing, it was looking bleaker for you.  You were isolated and alone; now all too alert to the possible threat, the man who paced his room whilst staring at you. Flinching when he reached past you for a heavy blanket, messing up his immaculately made bed, to wrap the thick nerf wool, loosely around you. 

If you had not been so worn out, you would have shoved him away. Hate for everything he had put you through, making you want to refuse his attempts to help you settle.  Your jaw clattering too much for you to make your demands, that all you wanted was for him return you to the cot bed he kept for you. To get away from him and return to somewhere you had at least been starting to think of, as your own space; and not for him to lean over you. Pushing back the hair from your face as he rubbed at one cloth covered hand. 

Hux’s hand at your shoulder made you jump, it slid intimidatingly down your arm; but you were too weary to fight him. So instead you allowed him to rub the nerf-wool against you, a failing attempt to rub warmness and perhaps some comfort back into you. 

“Let me see it.”

The hand at your arm slid lower, to grasp your wrist, and making you turn your hand over to show him the cut to your palm.  Hesitantly holding it out to him, your fingers still curled loosely around the wash cloth that he had wrapped it in. 

His head bent lower, odd strands of copper falling from his rigid helmet of hair, as he gently removed his makeshift dressing.  Taking your cut hand in his, turning it into the light to study you palm.  It wasn’t an overly deep cut, but it was long and jagged, throbbing in pain as he pressed it to check for debris.  Yet you supposed, in the grand scheme of everything that had befallen you here, it really was nothing. 

“I doubt that it will warrant sutures. But it does require cleaning.”

He left you briefly, returning from the refresher with a small metallic tin, and a bath sheet, looking expectantly down at you.  You blinked, realising he had been talking to you, fearful as he lowered to a crouch between your knees.  There would be repercussions coming for you ignoring him and given his creativeness; you dreaded to think what his next punishment would be.  He scowled decisively, before putting down the box, huffing and rising to a stand again.  You pulled the blanket tighter around you as he tried to get you to rise to your own feet. Eyes widening and your muscles involuntarily stiffening. This was not at all what you were expecting; this kinder General Hux, was not at all what you were used to and it frightened you.  The whole set up did.  Whilst General Hux had had you in his living quarters before, he had never allowed you into his bedroom.  You’d never even seen inside it, Hux always kept the door to it closed; and you well away from it. 

“The dressing can wait. I need to warm you up quicker than this, can you make it to the refresher?”

You blinked vacantly at him, hesitant that it was going to be necessary again for you to strip. It wasn’t the nakedness; he’d seen you like that so many times. No, it was the need to willingly bare yourself before him; to be vulnerable to a man who held your life in the palm of his hands. But Hux was right, you couldn’t warm up like this, the tiredness constantly ebbing away at your body heat.  The shivering alone, was gruelling. Adding to your already well fatigued state and making it harder to stop.  Your breathing came faster, as you realised that he would punish you for your hesitance to obey him.  Your tired body began building up another serge of adrenaline, for yet again another battle you would lose if you did not settle. 

Without warning he slapped you, not as unpleasantly hard as he had all those other times. But the burning sting enough to snap you out of your blossoming panic attack.  

“Get yourself out of those clothes, now solider.”

He spoke as a growled order; using a tone that he wouldn’t hesitate to use on one of his own men.  Your cheek stung and your chest relaxed; his intention was to stop your shivering, and listen to him, but he knew his soft talking hadn’t been working.  So instead he didn’t give you any options, taking that control from you.  

You tried; but your fingers couldn’t manage to get a proper hold on anything and so he began at last to help you.  Sliding off the thin shirt and trousers you wore, leaving you in just the soft sleep panties, your sister had gifted you with. You wrapped your arms over your naked chest, doing your best to preserve what little modesty you had left.  Whilst he waited until he was satisfied that your breathing was settled enough, to move you without triggering more anxiety, he pulled you swiftly to your feet.  If he looked away from your face, you never noticed it.  Whilst you didn’t look directly at him, you kept him within your peripheral vison, his head never dipping beyond your neck. Lifting your arms to wrap the towel neatly around your torso.  Leading you into the refresher. The room contained very little, for all it was clearly luxurious in its sparsity.  A smooth polished stone surrounding, made clearly to follow its function. 

He left the door open to the bedroom; but stood between it and you. Slowly herding you into the shower unit.  Waiting expectantly to see if you would voluntarily remove the towel, before huffing and reluctantly starting to strip off himself.  Something in the way he behaved with you now made you falter, it was too personal for you both to be naked, exposed to one another.

 

You froze; you had yet to see him naked and found the prospect of this more alarming, more intimate than anything he had done to you. More disturbing even than when you had sucked his cock.  You hadn’t had time to consider your pride at that point; that had at least been only to further your chances of an escape. But his expression was too unreadable, did he take care of you, because you were a useful acquisition, or because of Ren’s promise to Adrianna?  That was if she even still cared enough to still insist on their promised protection. 

You were painfully aware now, of Adrianna’s words to you now as he tried to climb past you and under the spray, with you.  Would he take getting into the shower with him, in the same way as your attempts to placate him had been.  He gave another sigh of frustration, outright commanding you move aside to let him get into the waiting shower with you. Gently pushing you to a side and forcing you to let him past.  

The water was warm; perhaps a little too hot.  The steam pluming between you both, as he firmly tugged you forwards to him, positioning you under the stream of warm water.     

He didn’t order the towel removed from you, until it was soaked through and too heavy to for you to properly hold up.  The fabric falling against the stone with a loud slap, its loss making you wrap your arms over yourself defensively again.  The water hitting hard against you, stinging your goose fleshed skin. The scaling heat and heavy tempo of the water, oddly soothing on your broken and bruised body. 

He perhaps knew this, letting you stand under the water to sooth your aching muscles, before reaching for the soap. Lathering it not with a wash cloth, but between his hands to smooth it over your naked form.  His fingers were strangely soothing, firm where there was padded flesh over your muscles; but gentle where they touched broken or bruised skin.

When he came to your panties, you were given no option, but to allow him to remove them from you and toss them aside.  His damp hair brushing your hip as he dipped lower.  You dared not resist him in this, letting him clean you thoroughly, even those more intimate areas that you would have preferred no one touched. 

“You prefer this shaved?”

He had insisted you allow him to keep it that way whilst under his watch and why you had chosen to re-shave your sex, under Ren’s care.  His fingertips grazed the flesh of your pubic mound with a single innocuous stroke, drawing your unwilling attention back to where he was touching.  It had started to itch the other day, so it had felt easier to remove it once more, figuring it wasn’t worth the irritation.  But now you began to question it, had that been the only reason you had chosen to do it?

“You have missed a bit; would you like me to get it?”

He’d already reached for his razor; and not wanting to displease him, you nodded your permission. Holding still whilst he ran the sharp edge over you; his unguarded blade keener than the safety blade Ren had allowed you.  More used to this this side of Hux now, it intrigued you.  Making you want to please him, to see more of this gentleness, more of him as a human being and not a tyrant.     

Cleaned and any hair that Hux had found removed, you were led from the shower.  You stood much warmer how, as he wrapped a fresh towel around you; a smaller one wrapped around his waist as he led you back to his bed.  He sat you down again, turning to pull clothing out from his draws.  Dressing himself, before handing a vest and a freshly laundered pair of his underwear over to you; giving you instructions to dress. 

Still keeping your arms wrapped around yourself, you faltered at this fresh order.  You didn’t want these scanty clothes he offered; you wanted back the clothing Adrianna has given you.  But more pressing was the need to please him, your body was riddled with reasons not to upset the General again.

“Thank you, Sir.”

His eyes softened and he swallowed thickly; emotion briefly flickering through his armour. Leaving you to dry and dress in privacy.  Turning to close the door behind him in perhaps a reward you for you good behaviour. You waited to see if he would return, before dressing yourself in his oversized underwear and vest top.  Doing your best not to set off the pain in any of your other injuries as you dragged the soft fabrics over yourself.  Sitting and waiting for your next set of instructions.   

He returned, carrying a metallic tray with him. This time he knelt down before you, ordering you to lift up his vest, so he could access the damage to your injured ribs.  His jaw tightened, and he opened the box next to you; the one that he had placed there earlier. Removing several items from it and laying them out on the bed next to you.

He opened first a cylindrical metal canister, eyes running your side to study the pattern of bruises, before applying a strong smelling, very thick, unguent to it that tingled so extensively that it almost burnt to have it applies.  Whilst it hurt your broken ribs, you soon felt it’s warming soothing effects easing the pain. His fingers dipping into the pot to repeat the process on the other side of your torso.  Wiping his hand on your discarded towel, and thoroughly cleaning his hands, before he reached again for the assortment at your side; warning you as he took you palm into his hands.  

“This will sting.”

If you had of been more yourself, then you would have laughed at his forewarning.  When had General Hux, ever been bothered about causing you pain?  As it was all you could manage was a, deep breath and a hiss.  The swelling of your lungs triggering the pain in your side again and pulling back open the split to your lip. He dabbed your lip with the same stinging antiseptic wipe that he had used on your hand, before placing a small dressing over the cut to your palm.  Hux almost tender as he methodically smoothed the edges of it flat, sealing the dressing to your skin.

“Fear makes us irrational.”

Your brows pulled together in oddment at his comment, it was a weird choice of words.  Did he refer to your fear of him, or that of the First Order and what it could do to you. No, something in the set of his jaw made you stop, at that line of thinking. It was something else, almost an apology; but for what?  He seemed to speak, not of your fear of him, of what he had done to you, but suggested his own fear.  He helped you smooth back the under-shirt you wore, before reaching for the other object he had fetched on the tray. Still kneeling, he held out a steaming mug of what smelt like soup.  You hesitated to take it from him, you should be hungry; ravenous even, but the idea of taking anything, even food from him still unnerved you.

“Ren would like you to returned to him, and ordinarily I would agree.  Your Force-sensitivity would make you a useful addition to his Knights, however I don’t think you would ever accept his authority, not even in fear.”

One thing was for sure, he was absolutely right; there was no way you were going to serve willingly or not under Ren.  Hux paused, frowning, at your hesitance to take the soup and forcing the mug into your hands.  He wasn’t aggressive, or pushy with his actions, just precise and encouraging.  

“Drink it, your body needs the nutrients.”

You still couldn’t bring yourself to drink the liquid and you sniffed at it reminding yourself that he was right. Even though you didn’t want it, you’d been too long without food not to drink it.  It contained nothing heavy or too rich; just what appeared to be a thin watery broth. Still as Hux slowly guided the hands holding the liquid up to touch your lips you could only manage a small sip.  You should have been hungry; you couldn’t remember the last time you had actually eaten anything with any substance and there in lay the problem, your body had forgotten what hunger was.

“Drink it!”

This time it was an order, and you flinchingly obeyed.  Your stomach only able to handle half of the mug before it started to protest and won over your fear of General Hux. Who gave a growl of warning when you tried to refuse it and put the mug back down on the tray.

“All of it.”

You nodded, eyes wide with protest at his gruff tone whilst you drank the rest, taking small even sips of it to finish it before he could get mad at you. His lip twitching almost to pleasure, when you showed him the now empty cup, his eyes warming slightly in his amusement at you.

“Good girl, now can you manage one of these.”

Your stomach was already complaining, strained to uncomfortable fullness by the soup.  But given the look he gave you when you took the dry biscuit off him, you would try and eat twenty of them, no matter how sickly-full you felt.  You ate it in small bites, forcing yourself to swallow them, whilst watching him; hoping for another look of approval from him. 

“You did well,” He wiped crumbs from your thighs, before rising to his feet and collecting the random items he had fetched; continuing to talk to you as he busied himself. “but now you need to rest.”

You nodded stiffly standing and flexing your legs, ready to walk to your chamber. He was right you needed to rest; either it was, very late, or else very early, by your estimate. You took a hesitant step, hoping that he had been his usual fastidious self and that the room wasn’t still in the same state that you had left it in before. 

“That room, it is not suitable.”

You were stopped in your tracks by his hand clasping your wrist, and he tugged gently leading you back towards his bed.  He had already uncovered the bedding and so it was a simple case of sitting you down.  It seemed very unlike the man, to leave your cell a mess, when he wouldn’t tolerate any disorder from you.  The room should have been cleaned and tidied, or at worst he would have deliberately left it to make you sleep amongst your own filth.  So putting you in here to sleep, insisting you got into his bed was not what you were expecting.   

“You’re thinking?”

His voice was conversational and not really probing for an answer as you sat down and he reached for a medicine pot, handing over to you.  It contained a single pill and you shook your head at the unfairness of it all, knowing what he handed over to you. All this fairness and kindness; then this, more drugs from the General.  You knew your body could tolerate a far higher level of drugs, than the average human; it was part of why they picked you.  But you didn’t know what exactly all of this was doing to you. 

“Will I be returned to my cell tomorrow”

Against your will your eyes filled, voice cracking as you took the pot from him.  Hoping the drugs were just a temporary way of controlling you; you would much prefer he utilized fear and pain than keep you drugged up.

“I said, it is no longer suitable for you,” He fished inside the pot taking out the tablet for you and holding it between finger and thumb towards your mouth expectantly.  “you will be staying here with me.”

It was a pointless question, but you asked it anyway.  “This is another sedative, isn’t it?” Your tears spilled, your voice had dropped to a whisper, it wasn’t even really a question, both of you knew exactly what it was.  You never had these before, but you weren’t an idiot. There was no way the General would risk letting you escape, or worse attack him in his sleep.  You knew your plea would fall on deaf ears, but you couldn’t help yourself, you had to try, shaking your head as you asked. “Please General, no more drugs.”

“It is necessary.”

“It isn’t; I haven’t tried to escape again.  I promise I won’t attack you again, it’s pointless now.”

You didn’t lie, you didn’t know how to escape, where to go if you managed it.  You couldn’t leave Adrianna to these monsters, you needed to somehow, get her to leave with you.  He nodded, and you opened your mouth allowing him to place the tablet on your tongue.  He held a beaker to your lips, you took a mouthful.  Opening your mouth afterwards for him, to show him that you had swallowed his pill. 

“Good girl, you did well.”

You no longer fought the warmth that spread when he complemented you on a job well done.  It wasn’t really worth worrying about feeling good, about pleasing your captor, if it would make life living with him more bearable for you and surely, it could only aid you towards earning your escape. So you lifted up your legs and tucked them under the blankets. Forehead creasing when he stroked his thumb over your cheekbone, right after he had helped to cover you up.

“Now sleep.”

You lay on your side, facing away from the other side of the bed, expecting him to climb in the other side; but instead he remained sitting next to you.  You could feel the weight of his gaze even with your eyes closed.  You knew better than to fight the sedative, and even without it you would have been tired enough to sleep.  So all the drug did was ease you faster into that fuzzy warmth, your only escape from the torment.

You didn’t dream, but you woke groggy but well rested.  The muscles down your sides were stiff again with disuse, but better than the other day.  Your breathing was freer, though stretching was still completely out of the question.  You pulled your knees up to you, you knew not moving would only make the recovery longer and exactly how to pull against your chest muscles in a good way.  The muscles loosening until they were no longer tight, the pain less sharp.

The bed at the side of you looked to have been slept in, the sheet ruffled, and a single red hair on the pillow.  You’d been too out of it on the drugs, but Hux must have crept in next to you whilst you slept. How long had you been out of it, had he left early, or had you been allowed to sleep a long time?  Your bladder felt full, and you stood to use the refresher, noticing the cuff as you swung your legs from the bed.  It wasn’t obtusely obvious; a lightweight and not overly thick band wrapped your ankle, attached to a lightweight, but if Hux was anything to go by, a very durable metal chain.    The chain was long enough to reach into the refresher, and you walked towards it slowly.  This was yet again, another reminder of your imprisonment.  Something else of the First Order that you didn’t want attached to your body.  The chain not really impeding your movements, just your mood.

Finished you washed up and returned to the bedroom.  You were wondering what to do with yourself, when the door opened.  The General stood at the threshold, you pointed to your ankle ready to demand answers. But he could read you like a book, even without Ren’s mind probe trick.  His brow raised in warning, to you and so you dropped the attitude, well some of it at least.

“I suppose you’ll only hurt me if, I don’t”

Already your hackles were rising in irritation, and you did not trust yourself to keep your tone civil.  It was safest to sit down and wait on him.  Hopefully he would tell you why this thing was around your ankle.  He bent to unclip the chain, folding it into a neat pattern on a hook, where it was attached to the wall.  It was all too much, he was taking too long about the task, his movements almost deliberately timed in their slowness to vex you.

“Am I to be treated like an animal General, collared and chained up like a pet?”

Something about your words had struck something with the man, the normally cool and collected General’s jaw, clenched at your taunt.   

“It is not sexual; the cuff is practical. It will monitor your vitals, already your results from medical show deficiencies.  You will be provided with vitamin supplements whilst necessary, and improvements will be made to your diet.”

You had not for one moment thought it was anything sexual.  His voice full of reason, as though chaining up humans in your living quarters, was a perfectly normal thing to do.  Maybe it was for the First Order, though you doubted it, you appeared to be a special case for the General, Ren had had told you so.

“And also, it will be used to ensure I am kept chained up, like an animal?”

Your temperament was getting dangerously close to breaking, as it was you were already pretty sure your attitude was beginning to bleed noticeably out into your voice.  But if Hux had noticed it, he was ignoring it, holding the door open into his living quarters.  

“Would you prefer I sedate you nightly instead?”

He spoke as thought this was the obvious solution as he disappeared through the doorway. Not willing to let this go, you took it as your invitation to follow him. You couldn’t believe your ears, couldn’t he just put you into your cell nightly instead.  It wasn’t like you could escape from there. You had not been expecting Kylo Ren to be in General Hux’s living quarters waiting for you, neither where you expecting to see Adrianna. 

You froze, aware of how exposed you felt, standing there so scantily dressed in the Generals clothing.  Adrianna was refusing to look at you, seemingly fixated on removing dirt from her nails, Kylo however raised a brow in question at your appearance.  Both of them making you feel sick with the unspoken assumption that you had slept with him.  Yes, they were your Generals clothes, but you’d an innocent enough reason to wear them. You faltered as you lowered yourself to the waiting chair realising what you had just processed.  Your General’ where the hell had that come from?

You were called over to a spare seat, instructed to sit down.  You had expected Hux or Ren to start the conversation, however it was Adrianna who spoke first. 

“We think we’ve located Keeva.”

That was not at all what you had been expecting.  Adrianna still refused to look at you, her current dislike of you obvious; and to be fair you were not currently so keen on her.  But all of this would have to be put aside for your youngest sister.  Keeva, had been everything you two hadn’t; quiet, calm and almost painfully shy.  She hadn’t even learned to talk, though you all knew it was a personal choice and not quite a development delay.  Preferring to talk mind to mind, and then only with her family. It unsettled you to think of her alone all these years, how had she fared in your absence? Both your younger siblings had used you as their mouth piece, but with Keeva it had been more than shyness.  She had struggled to find the exact words for her thoughts, finding it far easier to express and emotion then find such a small succinct way of communication. 

Keeva was a strong and talented Force user and would have been extremely useful to Kylo Ren.  She had never been adept in battle, but when you could wield the force like she had, then a weapon would be irrelevant.  It made you shudder to think of what would happen if the First Order getting hold of her.

“We believe the Resistance has her.”

You laughed; what began as a derisive snort became a nervous giggle and turned deeper as the sheer ridiculousness of it took hold. The tears sliding down your face as you held your ribs steady.  The resistance couldn’t have Keeva, you’d have known if they did, Ahsoka herself would have told you.

“Like she would have told you about me? Face the facts, they lied to you too all of them worked to keep us apart.”

“Your beloved Master Ren, didn’t keep you from me?”

“Oh, come off it he had no idea where you had gone, or who had hidden you and he never lied to me; I always knew you were alive.”

“Ladies!” Your argument would have continued had Hux not yelled for order.  You looked over to were Ren and Hux sat together.  Ren if anything was smugly amused by your argument, giving credence to your growing suspicion that he knew of Adrianna’s feelings towards him.  Hux however was not, his tone civil as he continued, but his meaning laced through the words he spoke. “This childish bickering is not going to help anyone.”

“Help the First Order you mean?”

“No, the First Order had no interest in your sister, that is a matter for the Knights of Ren.  I am merely here as a facilitator; you are after all my prisoner.”

You narrowed your eyes; it was there again, ‘my prisoner’.  Not a prisoner of the First Order, but Hux’s personal prisoner. Across from you Kylo glowered at you.  He had noticed that too, confirming Hux’s slip up to you.  If you could you would have moved away and sat yourself next to Hux, perhaps aware that for the moment; the sadist in the room, was also the safest.  You swallowed hard, your saliva like a hard ball of cotton in your throat, Adrianna hated you, because she thought Ren was interested in you.  Ren hated you because for all of his posturing Hux thought of you as his, and it threatened Ren’s relationship with Hux.  Did no one hate you for an honest reason?  You tucked your legs under you trying to look less of a threat and made yourself as small as possible.  Blatantly aware of the ridiculous an image you presented cowering in the General’s grey underpants and over-sized vest.  

Arianna took a deep breath to steady herself, before deciding to speak again.  Non-too impressed by Hux’s castigation of her; or having to speak civilly to you. But clearly determined to be seen as having some measure of control and authority in the meeting.

“It is proposed that we will send you back, to locate her.  You will of course, this time be working for us and not the Resistance.”

So there it was, finally your means of escape.  They expected you to defect, to become a collaborator for your enemy. This was beyond ludicrous; it was sheer madness to think you would sell out.  Shocked, you looked over at Adrianna, to see if she was anything but heartbroken, at the possibility of you not helping her get her sister back. Either she was too arrogant to believe you would not agree; or she hid her own fears well.  Her face unbroken with the pain of you possibly refusing. But as she looked over at you and dropped her walls you received your answer; so relived to feel it that you let that emotion wash over you. It suffused you, threading through every fibre of your being, mingling with your own guilt; until you felt remorse. 

You had been the elder and the more capable of the three of you.  You should have wanted Keeva back too and been as ruthless as Adrianna, in your desire to do so.  Adrianna felt that you had failed her, by letting her be taken in by those she considered monsters by keeping you apart.  You knew then, that you could not fail Keeva.  You would find her and get her out of the Resistance.  Hide her safely away somewhere whilst you worked on freeing Adrianna, then you could all be together again.  Yes, it seemed that you would risk appearing turncoat for your sister.  You would agree to their plan and then come back, and you didn’t care who in the Resistance knew it.  They like the First Order had no choice but to trust you; and the only way out of this was to trust Ren and Hux.  The ends justifying the means and making your decision for you, with a deep shuddering breath;

“I’ll do it.”        

 


	9. Colaborator

They had thought their plan flawless at your time of agreement.  You would be set free straight into the Resistance’s hands, meaning that you would finally make your dispatch rendezvous.  For your behalf all you had to do was, somehow convince them that you were really on their side. That is to say, it seemed easy, until there were added conditions to your release, you really should have realised it wouldn’t be that simple with General Hux involved.

“You do realise that we will expect total loyalty.  If you begin to falter, we will know; and I will not agree to your release.” Of course, Hux would have to speak first. His mistrust for you to complete this task, obvious by his assumption that you would do your best to fight Ren.  “Therefore Ren and I, have devised a solution to any possible divergence from yourself; an experiment of sorts.  One that as I personally have no intimate knowledge of how the Force works, Ren will be responsible for; one that he assures me it will work.”

Your lips pursed in annoyance as you glared across at Ren.  Not happy at all for him to have a say in all of this, let alone be his test subject.  He sat up straighter, almost a challenge to you, the burning hunger in his eyes growing, as he realised that Hux was hinting at handing you back to him. His gloating making you sink back further into your chair, as Hux continued his explanation.

“We have already had access your memories and have been reprograming your brain.  Ren has been laying the groundwork to change your allegiance at its very source, that way there will be no question of to whom you are loyal to.” You should have realised why Ren was so keen, to have you try this out.  If it was to work, he would have added another Force-sensitive to his ranks; possibly even two. And he was hoping for another one that he could train up as easy as Adrianna. 

You scoffed openly at his suggestion, cocky in your surety; it was never going to work.  You were never going to accept Ren’s authority; no matter what he held over you. “That isn’t even possible, even you can’t change my feelings towards the First Order emotions, they rely too heavily on my emotions; those are chemical memories and not reprogrammable in the same way as facts are.” 

It was Kylo Ren who stepped into answer this for Hux.  His tone less smug; worryingly more calmly triumphant as he defended his idea. “Written texts say otherwise. By changing memories, we take important events finding your trigger for joining the Resistance and replace it with a different version of events.”

You scowled at that; still not sure that he could in anyway manage this; but cautious to understand how to best protect yourself.  Hux cut in though before you could speak, his face a blank page, but he knew you were close to getting cross again.  You felt frighteningly agitated at being backed into this corner, and the bitterness had probably shown on your face, if not within your tone. 

“Not as such, when we first knew of your existence, it was first suggested by Ren to be Supreme Leader Snoke. But we realised with time, that that was not going to be an option and had it been, it would never be an outcome you would accede to. Therefore, it was decided, that Myself or Ren would be the candidate.” You paid careful attention to Hux’s offer, for all it was Ren you watched as he spoke. The glance the brunette shot Hux, suggested the redhead had afforded you a choice that Ren was not happy to have given you.  It was wise on Hux’s behalf to show you how he had bargained for you to have some rights.  Hux had known that to recondition your loyalty to Ren, would have been harder. Given that reconditioning was always going to be a certainty, Hux had done his best to prepare you for it.  Making sure to make it the most profitable outcome for himself, by gaining some measure of trust over you.   General Hux had not only done you a favour by talking now; but Ren too, though from the look Kylo Ren shot the General, he was neither understanding nor appreciative of the man’s generosity.  It had been wise for General Hux to have given you a choice in this, for that alone, you would much rather your fidelity be given over to Hux. Your eyes slid sideways to Ren, his face was almost feral with jilted anger, making you shudder at the prospect of his involvement with this.

It still wasn’t really even a choice; let alone an ideal one.  Both men were pure evil, they represented something you couldn’t stand alongside with. Secretly you gleefully doubted their plan would work.  However, there was still the chance to gain the upper hand in this. They had deliberately not told you that if this reconditioning was so effective, then they could force this on you willing or unwilling.  So by appearing willing and docile, it would leave yourself some space to plot, should escape be possible sooner or purely on your own terms. After all, you doubted Adrianna would fight Kylo Ren’s ultimate goal for you; she was too loyal to her master. 

You looked over at Hux, making eye contact and using every skill you had to appear grateful.  Proud of your achievements when, something reminiscent of relief shone in his sea-pale eyes; an oddly comforting side effect to your choice. Whilst he fought to keep his reaction neutral, you could tell he was pleased not just with your choice, but the words you chose to express it.

“Hux.  If I am to be reconditioned, then please Sir I would rather my loyalty was you.”

You spoke to him alone, discounting the others in the room.  Storing away that there was something about Ren, that Hux feared so much, that he did not wish to leave you with him.

It seemed like forever as you sat there staring at him, willing yourself to look over at Ren, to address your choice to him too.  Instead it was the feminine voice of your sister who, spoke taking charge for you again.

“If that’s settled then Master Ren, shall I head to training?”

Adrianna stood, dusting herself off, making for the door. If she was eager to get herself out of there; was it because of what you had done. Did it hurt to be around you? Did she really dislike you that much right now for making a choice she would have rather that you hadn’t had? You gathered from the last look she shot you, one of almost relived thanks, her assumption was you had chosen Hux because of her feelings, to keep yourself away from Ren.  You were not about to tell her otherwise; information was power. But right now you wanted her to leave, so that you could make one personal demand of Ren, before he too chose to follow her out.  Knowing that this would require more time in his presence than you wanted, but you could see the sense of it.

“I want teaching, to put up walls, some basic Force training to build on what I already know. I will use neither to block your reconditioning; but I want to keep those skills afterwards.”

You didn’t care why anyone left in this room would think you wanted them, nor that Adrianna would soon guess that you wanted them to keep her out.  It was becoming apparent that whilst you loved your little sister you couldn’t trust her; and to protect Keeva you would need to keep her out of your thoughts. 

The Knight studied you for a moment, before speaking his words picked over carefully; not an agreement, but a compromise. “There will be other things for the General to attend to, before I am able to finalise your reconditioning.  I see no reason why I cannot also supervise some training of my own, until then.”

The General nodded, his agreement to Ren; and you shot both men a look of sincere thanks.  It was good to have decided something for yourself in all of this, even if had meant having to ask your enemy for help. Knowing   Hux escorted Ren out his hand to the Knights waist at the small of his back, both men whispering to each other, looking back at you before leaving.

It made you uneasy, to have Ren and Hux discuss you so privately. The soulful look he shot you, as he bid you farewell oddly genuine for all it made you angry; he had no right to look at you that way.  Still, you knew better than to ask what the men had conversed about, their talk had obviously involved you, but if they had of been willing to discuss it with you then they would have done so.  You were not about to let on your discomfort, although alone now with Hux, you felt able to ask one question though.

“When Ren was in my mind General, was he relaying my thoughts back to your Leader.”

There was a tight flash of apprehensive amusement, his jaw tensing for a millisecond for all he betrayed nothing but acceptance of your treatment in his answer. “That was one reason for having Kylo Ren present during your interrogation. Although as an interrogator he served very little purpose. You are too resilient to the usual methods, we had to think of more creative methods.” You had thought something similar had been happening.  The conclusion only completely obvious now, after Ren had discussed it with you.

Hux sighed a datapad taking up his concentration for a moment, before he discarded it with another deep breath. Fidgeting over a choice of decanters, before pouring himself a generous drink from one.  “We had gathered very quickly you were not going to reveal any intel. Therefore your resilience was being assessed, for infiltration as our agent.”

Your gut jumped at this; another springing to mind.  Was the story about Keeva a convenient lie, did they really have any intel on your sister?  Or had they used her as a pawn to shape your willingness to follow their orders?  You wanted to ask, but knew better than to ask this, not wanting to lose a possible advantage over them.  

 “We would have sent you back regardless, you would have had no choice in the matter.  With Ren’s new information, it just became easier to convince your brain to accept the changes.  You have been compromised for longer than you realise.”

Hux stopped what he was doing, taking a drink and returning his attention back to you.  He had guessed that you were thinking; which meant that General Hux was beginning to read you quite well.

“So the torture was purely a distraction then General.”  Your voice had been a disbelieving whisper, drowned out by the door chime.  A droid entering once summoned with what smelt like food packages. Bleeping and laying them out on a heavy wood coffee table, between two blue couches.  Hux scooping to deal with them, his back to you whilst distractedly he hummed what could have been a reply. Laying out covered plates and boxes, whilst you ran your fingers on one hand along your arm in thought. 

The torture had been practically for nothing, almost purely for Hux’s entertainment then.  It all explained why eventually the questions stopped, only to start again when you had questioned the lack of them.  They had only needed to assess your trigger points and your pain thresholds should the Resistance decide to interrogate you.  Watching him portion out foods, you wondered how much he had really enjoyed hurting you; exactly how much pleasure had screams bought him?

“Have I not already hurt you enough, without you adding injuries of your own?” You hadn’t realised what you were doing until Hux grabbed at your wrist, making you jump and stop moving your hand.  Hux tugging it from where you had scratched your other arm bloody and tutting as you blinked twice at the mess you had made. Brow raised and your lips parting, at your reprimand and the unexpected shame that had filled his voice as he spoke. General Hux lifting your injured arm to look at it, before standing.  

“Don’t move.”

Your breath had stilled; not just from his words, but the tone he had used. You felt slightly uneasy, perhaps you had been too quick to pass judgement on his enjoyment of the torture.  

Hux returned, carrying another tub of cream.  You had expected it to be soothing, instead it stung as he rubbed it into your broken skin.  A wise choice, it gave you focus and grounded you; had the ointment been soothing, there would have been a good chance that you would hurt yourself once more.  This way he had given you a constant pain to focus on should you need it. 

You knew better than to thank him, but it somehow added to your growing approval of him.  He seemed fairer and overall less driven by unpredictable passion than Ren was; and the moments that he had hurt, you had been in all honestly your own fault.  Both the time you had escaped, and the time he mistook your actions as sexual you were to blame for acting up and not him. 

The Knight however, seemed to have a personal vendetta formed from his belief that you were a possession that he had somehow been cheated out of.  Therefore, if you had to lose control of yourself, then this man who wouldn’t admit it but seemingly cared for you.  He would be the better man to put your faith in, than the one who claimed to care but hurt you regardless.

Hux placed food before you. A small helping of fish and some sort of root vegetable, simple bland food.  But your mouth watered at the thought of finally being allowed solid food that tasted of anything, whilst your stomach gave its protestations that it didn’t want you to fill it.

“Eat.”

The command was simple and following it should have been simple enough.  But as you took a spoon full of the meal and raised it shakily to your mouth; you couldn’t do it.  Getting as far as your lips, before you had to replace it to the plate.  Tears pricking your eyes, in desperation. You knew you wanted to eat; the grey protein gloop had already left you thin enough already.  Already your muscle mass was at risk of decline, but you couldn’t eat. Pushing the food a little further away from you and glaring at it as General Hux walked to your side of the table. 

“Open.”

You fingered lightly over the scratches at your arm.  The irritation of the already inflamed flesh somehow soothing enough for you to reach out for the spoon again. Wanting to placate the General and not wanting him to take away the food.  You needed to eat it, needed to get better enough to fight.  But he had already taken the spoon from you, adding the smallest amount of white fish to the tip and holding it to your lips.  You parted them, just enough for the tip of the spoon to enter your mouth, closing around the food.  You chewed the food far more than was needed, only stopping when the General held a glass out to you. 

You allowed him to place the rim to your mouth. Taking a tiny sip, before he placed it back on the table reaching for the spoon.  It took five more small mouthfuls, each chased down with the smallest mouthful of water, before your stomach was protesting at the food.  You managed to ignore it for a further six and by now the plate was half empty. 

The General had shot you a look of warning as you tried to speak a request to refuse it, displacing his warning with his cooing, over how well you were doing.  You were struggling and when he raised another spoon to you, you out right refused to take another mouthful. Shaking your head and leaning away from the spoon.

“Don’t make me punish you.”

That was entirely the wrong thing to say and you sneered at Hux’s mock concern for you. Wishing you could find it in yourself, to not to hold back from causing him physical damage and lunge for that smug face. Your over full stomach threatening to over spill already, and the fear of adding to that goading you further into disobedience.  Reasoning with yourself, that neither of them cared enough about you; you were just an asset; a pawn for them to fight over.  Both Ren and Hux needed you in better physical condition, not to help you; but for their own selfish plans.

“Why, would you enjoy it General?”

He looked for a moment genuinely shocked, like you words had almost winded him. His expression reminding you of how shaken he had been, after your first medibay visit. Swallowing you wished that you had thought this through.  But any hurt he may have felt was pushed aside, as he quickly recovered his composure and control over his face. Addressing you once more, dropping his voice low into a low warning, holding the spoon out to you.

“I will ignore that little outburst; providing that this topic of conversation ceases right now.”

Defiantly you met his gaze head on, you were not going to give into him without a fight.  If you backed down now, then he would have won; and that would have pushed you dangerously close to looking like you cared enough about him one way or another; that you had upset him.

“Ignore what General?”

Your voice was obnoxiously dry and without any sensible regard to your personal safety.  Clearly you hadn’t already suffered enough damage from his temper already. Infuriated when Hux further ignored your childish taunt and instead continued to calmly hold the spoon up to you expectantly.  You were not taking it, swatting aside the hand holding the spoon and prepared yourself to flounce off.

“Oh I am sorry General, am I not allowed to bring up that you assaulted me?  Surely it can’t hurt your delicate sensibilities? After all there’s nothing emotional about you is there, unless it’s you getting yourself off on your power.”

The plate hit you hard, bouncing excruciatingly off your ribs, to clatter to the floor.  He towered over you, his steely eyes a light with fire.  The plate had really hurt, when it hit you making you jump hard, sending a jolt of pain to your ribs. You hadn’t realised that he had gotten him this close to breaking; but now the anger was apparent in the movement of his jaw as he clenched and unclenched it.  Your mouth dried, the jab you had about to make about his uniform being dirty, dying on your lips, as you whispered your apology.

“Clean that up.”

His order was a deep snarl.  One than in your sober state you hardly dared disobey. Ignoring the pain and leaping to your feet, starting off to find a cloth.  He caught your arm in a bruisingly hard grip and deftly threw you onto the floor to sprawl at his feet. 

Unable to risk any more pain you hissed and gripped your torso, waiting in baited fear. His eyes narrowing as he dipped his head to watch you, tapping his foot irritably against his polished floor.  His meaning was obvious; though you wouldn’t let yourself be debased that easily. You reached for a piece of food, your fingers closing around it; the sole of his boot, lowered purposefully onto your hand and squashing your palm to the floor.

“I said clean up your mess.”

His teeth didn’t once part as he spoke between them.  Breathing once to steady yourself, you turned your head and your tongue first sought out the boot on top of your hand.  Swirling saliva around the shiny black leather; the taste of polish mixed in with food as you swallowed. 

Satisfied you had cleaned it successfully, Hux raised the boot, from your hand. You gulped, trying to steady yourself, stiffly trying to lower your shoulders closer to the floor.  Praying that the General really did keep his floors as clean, as everything else.

The clacking of steps sounded, on the smooth floor, as Hux walked behind you in slow deliberate, measured steps.  A swift, firm kick against the rump of your arse, jolted you forwards.  The same foot placed deliberately at the hollow between your shoulder blades, pressure guiding your chest lower to the floor.  Your lips closed around a piece of soft fish, scooping it into your mouth. Your mind trying to override your tongues reluctance to let you swallow it, until eventually you won your argument. Swallowing thickly before moving onto another piece.  His boot keeping you low to the floor as you moved, the sole of his boot arching your bottom up to him. 

The act of eating soiled food was bad enough, without this position keeping your ass on display to him, making it wiggle for him each time you moved.  Your cheeks burnt and hot tears scalded them redder as you finished, your stomach now threatening a full-scale riot at being this full.  You were ordered to stay put, whilst the General returned the now clean plate to the side and returned with a plate and glass of his own.

He sat himself back down, on the sofa your sister had used earlier.  Swirling a glass of amber liquid, in contemplation as he nestled into the corner, before raising it to his lips.  He was calmer now, more his reasonable, reserved self; and you were not sure how you felt.

“Come here.”

You went to rise up and walk over to him, not wanting to approach him, but sure that it would get far worse for you if you didn’t. Your previous injuries painful enough that for now, you would be obedient.

“I did not give you permission to walk.”

You sank back to your knees, refusing to let your body baulk away from the task he gave you.  Head lowered in shame, as you crawled over to him, on your hands and knees. His legs parted as you came closer and you knelt in abeyance between them, Your head lowered and awaiting further instructions.  

His hand cupped your cheek, tilting your tear stained face up to him.  Your lips were puffy and swollen from the crying, as he held his glass to them, tilting it to afford you a generous gulp of the spirts it contained.  He stroked at your cheek as you swallowed. The fiery liquid burning both your throat and nostrils; cleaning the overriding taste of the floor from your palette. 

You waited tensed. As always, expectant for a blow that never came. Instead he too the time to scrutinize your face, waiting for you to make eye contact with him.  His voice was gentler, calmer now, but no less full of chastisement.

“If you are going to behave like an animal, then I will treat you like one. Now, lay down; Kitten.”

You did, hesitant at his choice of new pet name for you.  Curling yourself as tightly as you could manage, on a thick rug between his legs. Rewarded with his fingers stroking down the top of your exposed spine. 

He reached over you for his food and again lounging back comfortably, to finish his now cold, meal in peace.  Finished with it, leant over you and placed the plate on the table in front of him, stroking you once more, before picking up his holopad and ignoring you. 

You lay still as you could comfortably manage whilst he became engrossed in his work.  Occasionally he would huff, before taking a sip from his glass.  Outside it grew darker, and after a while he stood, walking away.  Your eyes were closed; and you so didn’t look up at him, unwilling to move, as the cold from the floor, started seeping into your bones. You heard him placing his plate in the kitchen, the clink of glass as you assumed, that he poured another drink, before returning to his seat.

His legs were replaced to their previous positions around you.  Careful not to step on or kick you as he sat down.  A click sounded as he placed a good sized glass onto the table, another he placed, on the floor next to you.  You uncurled a little to drink it, still nestled between his legs, whilst he typed. Grateful for the warmth the spirit afforded you, as you shivered in this position, relinquishing the last of your body heat.

“Stupid girl.” He reached down to you quicker than you could startle at his comment. Making you spill the last drips of your drink over the rug, as he pulled you onto his lap. Unfastening his jacket, and pulling it off, to give you it, pulling your arms through the sleeves.  “Why didn’t you tell me you had got so cold?”

You studied his face, for any clue this was a ruse, to check your compliancy. Honestly unsure of how to proceed in the face of his kindness. The jacket already warmer for you, and the heat of his lap seeping through the backs of your thighs.  There was the whole of the sofa to sit on; and yet he had chosen his lap.  Now your voice shaky from your bodies erratic jerking; and not just at the cold.

“I thought you would tell me off, for disturbing you.”

“What for telling me that your body had reached its limits? You put yourself in my care, remember.”

The simple reminder from him, had you biting your lip in thought, perhaps your welfare did somehow matter to him. Shakily, you lay your head back against his bared shoulder and your shoulders to his clothed chest. Warmth of a different type suffusing you, when he let you subconsciously tuck your head under his chin and relax against him.  He made an amused noise at you, snuggling you into him and pulled your feet to his hip. His hands deftly stroking warmth back into you until you stopped shivering.

 “Maybe you are a cat, should I replace the locator chip at your ankle, with a collar and bell, Kitten?”  You blushed at the reused pet name. Realising with oddest certainty that he was teasing you good naturedly and not to humiliate you.  You bit your cheek; deep in thought and frowned. Perhaps given Hux’s final goal; some of the earlier taunts been attempts at pet names too. At the first signs of heat touching your cheeks, you shook your head; pleasantly flustered by it all but not prepared to chase down that line of thoughts. Instead settling on intel gathering.  

“I thought you said, there was a chip inside of me?” You doubted the General had lied to you, but it seemed pointless to put two locator chips on you and so it was wisest to check.

“There still is, the internal one however is currently inactive. For the purposes of our plan we need the Resistance to believe the one at your ankle, is the only one we have on you.  Your internal chip is organic in design and can be reactivated remotely.” He reached for his own glass whilst he spoke and handed it to over to you to drink.

“And my control chip?”

The smooth leather stroked the bridge of your nose, your lips parting ever so slightly at the touch.  You were relaxing into this now; and not just to manipulate him.  No longer as fearful, you were allowing yourself to enjoy the human company; to perhaps enjoy him.

“That is still active Kitten; but remember that I have given my word to only use it in extreme circumstances.”

Your blush spread further across your cheeks and to your ears.  The threat he had given lost as you concentrated on that one word, Kitten.  You curled up tighter on his lap; Hux ignoring the mess on the floor to continue with his work.  Angling the holopad so you couldn’t read it, whilst he looked over his work.

You were ignoring it anyway.  Concentrating solely on your thoughts and your drink, dipping you finger into the liquid to play with it.  Before absentmindedly raising your finger to your lips, sucking the amber liquid from your fingers in between mouthfuls of the smoked honey taste. 

He at times squirmed beneath you, and worried he was uncomfortable with you on him; you offered to move. Each time, General Hux declining and pulling you back to him again and you twirled the glass between your hands. Drinking the last drop of drink from it and cradling the glass to you. Only half aware of it slipping through your fingers, as you fell asleep.

You woke sometime later, still in the Generals arms.  His fingertips brushing stray wisps of hair from your face, as you stirred and blearily you watched him.  Blinking the sleep from your eyes, comfortably aware it was much warmer in here now. 

A fire had been lit in the grate opposite, making you gather Hux had received visitors whilst you had been asleep; and you aware that you had slept too deeply.  You should not have relied upon this man to protect you.

“I had not anticipated that the alcohol would have affected you as it did, your system is sadly more compromised than I had realised.”

Your stomach gave a little growl and that made his lips twitch into a sort of smile. Pleasant enough, it was still stiff and formal.  This was new to you, until now you’d never had the General smile seem so innocent.  The only other times he had been amused, had always been at your discomfort.  You tensed suddenly at that thought, Hux lifting you from his lap to gather the empty glasses up. Placing them on a sideboard and opening containers to take out items, making you relax as you smelt them and realised with relief, that he was going to feed you.

“The clothes on the table are for you, Adrianna advised on your size they should be correct.”

You fingered the cloth, not sure if it was permissible to change and not sure you wanted to.  Instead wrapping the Generals jacket further around you. It was the second time today you had eaten proper food; though judging from the view outside it may have been closer to the next day.  You approached an enormous window and looked through it and out into the velvety darkness; conscious that this was the first time he had every let you study your surroundings.  There wasn’t much to see, just what seemed to be a forested landscape, the sky prickled with unfamiliar stars.  You truly had no idea where you were being kept, none of the First Order bases had been common knowledge to you.  Their locations kept secret in an obvious ploy against their enemies. 

Eventually you picked over your reflection on the black tinted glass. The face that seemed to have been changed by weeks of torture; and yet was still the same as when you set off. His clothing hung loosely on you, his jacket to your thighs. You really did need to change clothing; your thoughts reminded your treacherous heart.  You were allowing yourself to take comfort in your enemy, you should have been fighting him at every step, not sinking further into complicity at his company.

His hand at your shoulder drew your attention back to the room, making you acutely aware of the smell of eggs cooling on the table.  Docilely you followed him to your seat, however you only managed a few mouthfuls before you felt full.  It wasn’t that the food was unpleasant, but that your stomach wasn’t entirely emptied from the last meal; making you struggle to each it, despite it being a much smaller portion than before.  You knew though, that it was sensible to stretch your stomach and to get it used to solid foods again. 

“There is no need to force yourself, you have eaten once today.”  He had sat with you whilst you ate, his own meal a much more complicated meal than your simple eggs and bread.  But you knew the logic, too much rich foods and your body would outright reject them.  The meal done, he directed you to use the refresher.  Giving himself time to clear up his living quarters, before he joined you in the bedroom.  Clipping you to the wall chain for the night, whilst he took a shower.

The only real difference from the night before was, his presence in the bed next to you as he propped himself up to work.  His hair was still damp and brushed loosely back, the sharpness of his cheeks illuminated by the light from his holopad.  The occasional change in his breathing, telling you which reports he was frustrated with.  

You rolled over, the light distracting you and tonight’s sedative not really working. You wondered if he ever slept, occasionally needing to shift position, unable to find sleep yourself.

You were still awake when he put the pad down to sleep and unable to switch off as the General turned to you in the darkness.

“Do you need another sedative? I can order a second one in a much lower dosage for you.”

There was no malice in his voice, just simple concern that you needed your rest.  You shook your head, and verbally declined the offer. Feeling him move closer to your back, his voice low and uncertain as he spoke practically into your ear.

“Something else then?”

You were grateful for the dark of the room, so that he couldn’t see your reaction. Catching the tell tail signs of arousal swirling your body.  The Zeltron side to you, made you higher sexed than many humans, regardless of the situation; and the way he had handled you today had set you off.  You had kept his vest on to sleep.  Exchanging his underpants for a clean pear of your own from the pile on the table, furiously hiding the evidence of your arousal from yourself, in the laundry chute.

You knew that you’d been wet since he had degraded you, over your refusal to eat your food; you just weren’t happy accepting it.  On top of that, having been given no time alone take care of yourself.  Granted your earlier treatment hadn’t always inspired you to try; but this more relaxed setting was making a difference. But had he guessed from your behaviour; or was the chip relaying signs of arousal? 

You could feel how close he was to you. The warmth of his torso reflecting pleasantly off your back. His breath as he spoke tickling your spine, your shivers highlighting your plight.  Then his hands gripped your hips and tilted you back against him, a sultry promise whispered in your ear that he wouldn’t take anything from this encounter; it was just to help you sleep and nothing more.

There was nothing you could do about it, and you felt disgusting at your lack of repulsion at needing him to touch you. His hands grazing the front of your panties and skimming over the clothed mound of your sex. First cupping and teasing, then descending beneath the cloth fabric to rub at your bare flesh. Your shoulders moulding themselves to his chest, the days stubble on his cheeks scratching at them.  This touch was different from before when leather had rubbed your skin; his fingers were warmer, smoother; gentler as they skimmed over your flesh.  Firm enough that they fed into your arousal, but not enough to hurt too much.  You parted your legs and gave a small gasp, thrusting your hips.  Allowing him to pull your leg backwards and over his hip.  Giving his fingers unrestricted access to your sex. 

There was a heavy inhale from him, as his prominent two fingers dipped inside of you, quickly discovering exactly how wet you were.  His breathing deepening with yours, your heart thundering as you let him swirl them inside your sex, your hips canting to angle his hand just so.  He moaned murmured admonishments at how wet you were, the rebuke creeping through his voice, as he reminded both of you this was purely mechanical on his behalf.  That you needed to sleep, so this would help; his detachment strangely arousing as he touched you.  Reiterating his promise, that he was not taking any personal pleasure from this.  Keeping his groin angled away from you, so it was impossible to tell if he lied; but the throaty moan that slipped your lips, had the arm he wrapped around your waist tightening. 

He rubbed your wetness against you, his fingers picking up in speed at having you writhe against him. Your own hand slipping under your top, your nipples already hard from the arousal, pressing against the fabric of his vest.  You were close, your breathing ragged, if you could just toy with those swollen buds, it should be enough to bring you over the edge.

The hand from your waist roughly pushed yours aside.  His own thumb and forefinger closing around your nipple, rolling and pinching them. Your skin prickly, sweat dusted and hot, whilst he did his best to keep his breathing even.  Your freed hand, encouraging his to cup your whole breast, rubbing your hard nipples against his palm, your other placed between your legs.  Brazenly holding the hand at you pussy in place, as he fucked you with is.

“Good girl.”

The low purr praising you, was enough.  His breath and lips as he uttered the words so close to you, that they made your body tense one last time.  Keening indiscernible words as you broke, flooding your panties and his fingers, with your release.

Boneless, you couldn’t move, as you panted back your breath whilst he held onto you, moments more than was necessary for the mechanics of all of this.  A clipped salutation of goodnight, so different from the way he gently disentanged, himself from you.  Him gracefully turning over, whilst you could only loll over onto your stomach; at last sleepy.  You welcomed it, refusing to let yourself process what had just happened, satisfied that this rest would be refreshing.

 


	10. Empty Quiver

The General had lied to you, not in his words but by his actions. First you had been allowed the morning to sleep, slipping from drug induced rest, into honest sleep; the first refreshing sleep you had had.  Aware as you burrowed under the covers, of the redhead creeping silently around his room in some foolish attempt not to wake you.  You had taken the subtle offer to rest, with groggy relief.  Nesting deeper into his bed and drifting in and out of rest, waking at your own leisure, to take a lengthy shower in total peace. 

You had just finished drying yourself and contemplating how to dress yourself with the chain still attached to your leg; when the General broke breathlessly into the room.  Pushing an oddly loose strand of his hair back into place, he unhitched the chain. Tucking it away in a cupboard and in the same fluid motion, twisted to toss the wet pants you had slid down it into a waste cute.  You were commanded to dress quickly in clothing he all but threw at you and then join him in the lounge. Where Ren had been waiting for you, his hand outstretched and ready. 

Hux had stepped towards you and given you a hasty warning at your first defiant stand. Controlled and emotionlessly warning you that drugs would be used, if you fought his sleep command. So you hadn’t. Standing there numbly heartbroken and dejected, whilst permitting Ren the access needed to make you sleep; too hurt by his betrayal to do little else but comply; until you woke up, asleep on a bed, once more locked in Ren’s rooms.

Now you were furious that he had given you over to Ren.  Not at Hux, but at yourself.  You had been so naïve; too clouded by sentiment to see the game that was being played last night. Why the hell had you permitted it, how could you have allowed yourself to get attached to his lies.  You sprang into action, determined that someone was going to pay. There was no one about, and you wondered his rooms in search of potential weapons and escape routes, the cuff still at your ankle; but the chain missing. 

There was no way out and several of the doors were barred to you.  Making escape impossible; but not retribution.  You would have perhaps sobbed, if your anger at his betrayal would leave you to your sorrow; but instead you seethed.  Every object in the room a potential weapon, but which one was the best one?

You were debating between two daggers, when the doors slid open, admitting the Knight into his quarters. Fully dressed in his robes and helmet, he paused looking at where you stood griping the knife. You dropped your knees into a fighter’s stance, and he removed his helmet, nonchalantly tossing it onto a nearby side.

“Get on with it then.”

His voice echoed the, amused smirk he wore.  Taunting and belittling of your abilities as he sauntered halfway towards you.  Encouraging you to come at him with the knife, his hands bare and raised, his shoulders squared and threatening as you snarled back.  

You were no mewling weakling and so you screeched your fury at his taunt.  Rushing forwards to at least try and damage him, knowing that in this, your smaller size would make you faster than he was. You swung twice and managed a rip in his sleeve, before he caught you. Pulling your back to him and with a twist and pinching your wrist hard enough to make you drop the blade into his waiting hand. 

He used his wounded arm to bring it up to your neck. The glinting blade pressed to your jugular, wet with his own blood. The edge pressed deep enough not to cut, but as a voiceless command to stay still.

“So much for the Generals promise, that you are behaving yourself.”

There was a fearful stab that all of the kind posturing yesterday, had just been a last attempt by Hux, to get you to behave for this. That he had always been intending to hand you over to Ren; that you were stuck with this monster now.  Struggling against his hold and now determined that if that was the case, you were not going to comply; even if it meant more pain for yourself.    

“I promised the General that I would send you back to him in one piece.  But try my hospitality again, and you will remain here with me; and I will not be permitting you back into his bed.”   

You should have been relived that this was only a temporary change in your living quarters; that you would be returning to General Hux.  But the honesty behind Ren’s threat wasn’t lost on you and that was what ceased your struggle. The knife disappeared as you stilled, and he placed both hands on you. Holding you tight to him in your submission.  Kylo Ren knew where you slept and because of that thought Hux was having sex with you.  That somehow it was how Hux controlled you through intimacy.  You were not stupid enough to let him know you were not intimate with General Hux.  His incorrect suspicion of that left you with too many avenues of misdirection and protection.  But you were, stupid enough, to goad him, you wouldn’t give the man your submission; even unwillingly.  Your voice dropped into a monotone warning. A wolfs growl that was fit to challenge what you hoped were his personal feelings for the General. 

“Careful Ren, you’re beginning to sound jealous.”

“Of Resistance Scum, I hardly think so.” Oh, he was threatened by you, it was there interlaced in his reply.  The bitterness and pain evident, in his willingness to hurt you, for the General’s perceived attachment to you.  Then there was something else, something that hurt in a way you could not explain.  “It would hardly be the first time I have had to share, but this time, it appears to be different.”

Somehow that left you physically reeling, your body doing what you head wouldn’t let you and letting go, Kylo Ren too ceasing his struggles.  If he had meant to hurt you by assuming you had been attached to the General, then he was wrong. But something about what he said, you refused to acknowledge. Refusing the probability that he was right, that there was something off in the way he treated his prisoner. 

Instead of lashing out, you sank to the floor and clutched your knees tight to you whilst Kylo Ren took off his cowl.  Draping it loosely over a chair and then busying himself in another room, returning with both his outer and sur-coat gone.  You expected him to look smaller without the layers, but somehow in just his pants and the undershirt, he was more imposing and scarily more human. 

“The General hasn’t seen fit to explain to you the necessities to you being here, has he?”

Ren knew that he had not, he was just taunting you.  The move had been so sudden that you’d only just had time to dress, before Ren had given you orders to sleep.  But clearly by the triumphant leer that he gave you, then there was something to hurt you in the reason for your hasty departure. His smugness making you more stubborn, you were not going to ask, for an explanation and you would not betray General Hux by letting on that you were hurt by his betrayal.  Instead pulling yourself together, back straight and nonchalantly tilting your head to him.

“You said you would be returning me, so how long will  _this_  be a thing for?”

It had carried forwards in the bored, innocent tone to your voice and not you looked around.  Spreading your arms to gesture to the room, an indication of your shared quarters and exactly how lowly and unsuitable you found them.  With a slow blink, he pettily ignored your question.  Closing his eyes in silent meditation until you rose to your feet and with a badly concealed huff, returned back towards the bedroom he had placed you in.

“So angry and yet when it suits you, so calm.  Has your General taught you when he expects you to submit, or will any cock do?”

You nearly rounded on him, remembering at the last time his warning. Should you decide to attack him, then he would punish you by keeping you here; and that could possibly be given the facilities in his bed.  Then if his threat was as true as you thought it was, seek the same methods of control over you, as he thought the General was finding. 

You refused to let him see his comment had riled you almost to striking him, wondering how a force user could have it so wrong. Surely if there was a relationship between himself and Hux; it would have been advantageous for him to have force bonded himself to Hux. 

“I doubt it, why is it what he taught you.”  

You made a clear jest at knowing his, personal life. Not really all that surprised, when he answered back with more frankness than you had been expecting.  Keeping his voice level and his poise still that of a man in meditation, though the wording he chose, spoke a different story.

“It has always been purely sexual between myself and the General, mechanical release and nothing more.  It would be foolish to think that he can offer anyone anymore.”

He was bitter about something, and his reaction to that was to take it out on someone else and to try and perceive their pain the only way he could; in an equal focus as his own. You had never been so foolish as to even consider there was any sort of an emotional attachment towards your gaolers.  Ren’s words were meant to hurt, to remind you that you were General Hux’s prisoner, as much as the ones still in the cells.  It was too much, he had won his argument with his assumptions, it left only truth to argue your case with him.

“I have not had sex with General Hux. And one more thing, he is not my General, any more than he is clearly yours;  _Ben Solo_.”

That made Ren lose his control, springing over to your seat, faster than you would have thought humanly possible.  Colliding with you and pinning you to the floor by your throat.  His eyes blazing with fire, but his voice stone cold as he warned you.

“That man is dead little Jedi. Do you want to evoke the wrath of the man who killed him, by calling for a dead man?”

You were not going to be that easily intimidated.  He could hurt you, but you were pretty sure he wouldn’t leave any lasting damage, he knew by now they needed you to fulfil their plans.  Your words were strained by the hand gripping your throat, but you continued your struggle to enunciate them all the same.  Any fear you had left swept aside by your victory, words could do more damage here, than his actions ever had.

“Have you forgotten, there are no Jedi left.  You murdered them all.”

Suddenly the fire left his eyes and with a sharp inhale, they widened. The strength in his grip faltered, to a loose hold on your neck, his forehead resting to yours. His voice now quieter, remorse wavering through the edges of his words.

“No, little Jedi not all, I never killed you. Nor do I ever want to, try to,  ** _Watch_**.”

He used the same process as when he had slipped into your memories before; but this time you had been awake as he wrapped his conscious around you.  Pulling you closer to him, enveloping you, drowning you in himself as he pulled you down into himself.  Making you stand with him as he watched not your memories, but his own.

_He was at first a gangly pre-teen. A young lad who’s arms and legs had seemed too large to contain himself, as he sat, staring in awe at your cradles.  He looked first to his mother for approval, before your own nodded and lifted one of you towards him.  Esme you realised, as she was placed into his waiting arms, and he gave a small grin.  You could sense his wonderment at the small bundle in his arms, the smell of new-born overriding his senses as he cooed over her._

 

_“They are the first to be born to the New Jedi Order Ben, a treasure we must protect if we are to grow in numbers.”_

 

_You hadn’t seen his uncle; nor had Ben, until he had stepped from the shadows.  Speaking to the then, Ben, Master Skywalker had kept to the side, as he slowly walked over to join him, stopping to let his own fingertips brush her forehead.  Something in his touch woke her, and she gave a wail of protest at being in a strangers’ arms. Your mother sensing the young Jedi’s discomfort at her distress, took her from him.  Leaving him to wander between the other two cribs._

_He paused before yours and finding you awake, tilted his head to look at you.  Your immature eyes unable to focus on anything.  He studied you for a moment, before reaching his hand out to you and you took one finger in your tiny fist.  Somehow as aware then of the promises he silently wrapped around you, that he would protect you, as you were stood with him now._

 

_There was a blur and then a different memory, the three of you now barely older than toddlers.  Younglings he proffered for you, as he stepped from the shadows to join you staring down at your siblings.  Together you watched his young teenage self be teased by other padawans, as he deliberately lost in a mock battle to Adrianna.  Laughing as you watched your sister pile herself on top of him, her practice sabre extended to strike.  Stopped when he jumped quickly and made her squeal in delight as he tickled her until she childishly demanded that he stop.  Ben had been one of the few other people she would talk to, and even now you could remember that it had shocked the elders around you, to hear her childish voice._

_Another and he was no longer such a rangy teen, his muscles beginning to develop into those of a man.  He had been home on a visit and the three of you had been desperate to see him even though it was late.  You had loitered about the stairs well past your bedtimes. Your parents away had left you with Master Luke, who had put you to bed hours ago.  It had been Esme that had awoken you, her mind frantic with excitement as his Force-signature had registered.  You all risked chastisement for being up this late. But you waited hoping, as he kicked off his boots he would see you._

_He had, placing his finger to his lips as he pulled parcels from his coat, handing one each to you all before shooing you off.  You had raced the stairs, stopping to watch as Esme placed a kiss at his cheek in thanks for hers; guilty that you should have done the same._

 

_The final image he showed you was of your eleven-year-old self.  It had been decided that you were to take the Initiate trials that year. At least a whole year before your siblings would be ready, and having completed the other trials, now you stood in the ring to prove your prowess with the sabre.  You had won every battle before you noticed him, standing to one side._

_“I wanted to progress to Master; and to have all three of you train beneath me.  None of you should have ever been separated so young, but that was the Jedi way, we were to have no attachments.”_

 

_You had forgotten this was his memory, so enchanted in watching yourself fight.  You had been good; very good for a child, though Adrianna would have bested you in physical combat, your use of the force was much stronger.  Both of your fighting styles perhaps had mirrored closely that of Ben Solo’s, but whilst she had learnt to adapt it to pure aggression, yours was merely used in defence._

 

_“I had settled then for just you, but I was denied even that.  Master Luke was too afraid of what I might become, even then.”_

 

_You looked over at him. Shivering as you realised that this shared state left each of you crudely, open to one another.  You could hide nothing and felt him wash over you once more, this time delving into your memories and seeking something else; not just a memory, but a feeling. You spoke to him in offering for the first time not aggression, but a suggestion that you could cooperate; a gift for having displayed his own vulnerabilities to you._

 

_“What do you seek?”_

 

_“ **This**.”_

 

_He too perhaps what you would not have permitted. Darting into the thoughts quicker than you could hide them, and plucked from you, the memory of last night.  Of you asleep contentedly on Hux’s lap and the dreams you couldn’t remember having, pulled to the forefront, as your frustrated brain had meditated on your earlier treatment.  Your shame at him discovering your dreams was instant; and that Hux was the obvious focus of.  You could see how those of Hux touching you had made your breathing stutter and your eyelids flutter. Thought he interlaced nightmare had distressed you, though each worried whine was soothed quickly, with an unexpected soft kiss to your temple._

_“Hush, you worry too much.  Even though he was aware of the effects your dreams had on you, the General doesn’t know what exactly you dreamed of.”_

 

_Horrified you had glanced over at Kylo Ren.  You couldn’t find words to express your mortification.  Timid in your movements now as your thoughts turned to the conversation at the door when you had chosen to stay with Hux.  Had Ren known of your attraction to Hux all along; did Hux know?_

 

 _“Yes.”_ _You swivelled your eyes back up to his; locking yourself in his honeycomb depths._ _“I warned him you had an unusual level of attraction to him; but he dismissed it.”_

 

_You were dumbfounded by this slight admission of care from him, though it was quickly swallowed as he showed you the projection of your time in bed last night.  You hadn’t given any thoughts to your abilities, nor had you known you were projecting as Hux’s fingers had been against you. The fanciful thoughts that had flooded you mind as he brought you closer, and closer to completion had all been caught by Ren.  Now you watched as he showed you himself, laid in bed, woken to your thoughts of Hux fucking you, his own hands skimming his painful erection.  Panic filling your eyes as you realised that Kylo Ren wasn’t jealous of what he thought was your closeness towards Hux, he was jealous of Hux’s closeness towards you._

The shock of it all made you break from his hold on you, struggling back to the present.  You pushed against him whilst it was just his lax bodyweight that pinned you down.  His grip at your throat had long since slackened, his hands were loose around your collar; making it easy for you to partially roll out from under him. 

He didn’t move, nor did he let you get too far from him.  His eyes blackened pits; made that way. both by this half-light and now you realised it, the effects your closeness was having on him.  You squirmed, trying to get way.  Watching the blush tinge his nose and cheeks as your struggles pressed the evidence of his desire against your hip. 

“Adrianna, says you have no interest in women, but that’s not the case is it?”

Your voice wasn’t aggressive, just demanding.  You needed answers and right now he was not a threat; he looked tired and dejected, his low mood obvious in his humble position as he turned his face away from you.  So the great Kylo Ren, was actually capable of shame.

“No.”

It was an unusually succinct reply and he removed himself from you in a sudden and swift bound.  Rising to his own feet and leaving you to rise on your own.  It confirmed everything you had suspected Adrianna was wrong about. Kylo Ren was keeping secrets from her, huge ones; you’d always know that to manipulate him, you had had to work with some level of interest.  Something of her words rang true though and you needed to find out what it was, to be able to stay with him.  There needed to be some trust, even if it was forced you had to know where you stood.

“When my sister says that you had never been with a woman, did she lie; or did you?”

 “She spoke the truth, as it was when I gave it to her.  I have been with men, never women until you.”

It was probably more information than either of you should have been discussing and when you looked over at him, the set of his shoulders, made you feel sick at your behaviour.  That seemed to animate him, the sorry look you shot him making him beg to show you one last thing from that day. His fingers reaching out towards you ready; though he waited on your answer before he acted. 

You wanted nothing but to be free, to not have to face another poignantly shameful memory of your behaviour; but you owed him that.  Curious to see if the boy who had honestly swore to protect you all was still in there somewhere.  You nodded to his request and grit your teeth ready for what you would be shown, this time it was his vision of you alone on the interrogation table and then him furiously storming in.

_“Hux, had worked it out before I had.  It was an accident finding you in the club, I thought you just a pretty face in the crowd; one that happened to be carrying the message we were there to intercept.”_

 

_“Hux suspected what, that I was the spy?”_

 

_“No, that I wanted you.”_

 

_He sounded so pained by his words, so conflicted by his emotions, that you faltered in your rebuke of him. It was near on dammed impossible to openly deceive in this state; but he could twist words, make his answer seem like something else._

_The memory had progressed whilst he spoke and now he moved to stand next to his shadow self, peering longingly at you. Glancing between the drug induced, sweat stained and lust soaked you then, and the shameful you that stood with him now._

 

_“I don’t’ see it as you forcing me, I know that’s how Adrianna perceives it, but that is her way of coping.”_

 

That made you angry, if that was the case, then why had he brought you here to show you this.  Demanding to know why he was guilt tripping you, as he _pulled your ghost-self to him.  The table and your other-self gone. Leaving you standing in nothingness as he wrapped his arms around you, pulling your weeping form to him.  His voice soft in your ear as he stroked your back._

_“To show you, it wasn’t your fault.”_

Angry tears of frustration were streaming your face when you opened your eyes. Shoving aside his hands and demanding that he leave you alone.  It confused the hell out of you to have this information gifted to you so late in the game.  It was all an obvious play for power, yet another attempt by him to manipulate you. This false kindness, making you prefer the straight thinking, anger filled Ren.  That one was at least honest in how he treated you, he was not trying to gloss over his own history.

“You still killed my family Ren.”

He blinked in shock at your accusation, yourself smirking as you realised that he had genuinely thought his confession and the memories of his past, should have wiped out all animosity between you two. Sniffling and struggling away from him, furious at his lack of responsibility over his own actions; fighting away the hands that tried to reach you.  Your childhood, your friends; even your sisters had all been lost through his actions; and yet somehow, he had thought that bringing your behaviour into this would make you even.   

“What the hell are you playing at, get your fucking hands off me you, you, fucking sick murderer!”

Not even realising you had done it, you reached for his sabre, Ren using the force to toss you aside into a wall.  His face like thunder as he summoned his lightsabre pommel back to him and activated it. 

He wanted you to be scared, yet as terrifying as it was; it still had the aura of a jealous toddler as he swung the blade around.  First at the couch, then the table, sparks of semi molten durasteel flying everywhere, making you shield your face from the mess sent your way.   Hissing at the sting of lumps of barely cooled metal that hit your forearms.  A lump of almost molten metal hit your clavicle, the pain so intense that you couldn’t breathe to scream in pain, as sank easily through evaporated clothing, welding itself to your skin. 

You staggered away, instinctive fingers ready to touch the spot and to tear it off you, when his hand caught yours in mid movement.  His other dropped the deactivating sabre and in one fluid movement, force-pulled the solidifying metal from your skin.  It hurt possibly as bad as the chip, but without effecting your motor skills.  Quickly you fled from him; into the only available room with a lock; the refresher-room.  The door slamming, lock activated to keep him out, whilst running the tap, your wet a cloth to apply a cold compress to the skin.

That it only hurt now around the edges, should have been the first indication of how badly you were hurt.  Indeed, when you pulled back the cloth you winced, it a small mark, surrounded by blisters filled fluid sacks and shiny red skin, but the centre was deep and burnt through. This injury, far worse than anything the General had done to you in interrogation, it would need help to heal and would scar badly. 

A knock came at the door, Ren’s voice; no longer full of fury, begging for both admittance and clemency.  You ignored his pleas, settling yourself against the door as in desperation his shoulder continually banged against it.  The door shuddering less with each blow, making your resolve to remain in here, stronger than it had been.  You stood, holding yourself straighter, satisfied as Ren’s shoulder made a duller thunk, the frame not even shuddering at his banging.  At the first lengthy lull, you stepped back from the door, expecting the red light of his blade to be shoved through the door lock, restless when it never came; your legs growing weaker.

It wasn’t long before you had to sit down. Clearly General Hux had not been lying when he had said your body had been compromised without the steady influx of nutrients, and given the injury, it was time to give it rest.  Now too cold from the exhaustion, you found yourself foregoing the washcloth in favour of wrapping yourself comfortably, inside a clean towel. Shivering with cold sweat chills as you closed your eyes to rest.  

You weren’t sure if you had dozed off or not, when you heard raised voices behind the door One as you listened, you knew to be Ren; but you had not been expecting to hear the second presence there with him. His voice stern and distant; but carrying through the walls.

“Ren, this is really too much, we do not have the time for this.  I ask you to watch her for barely seven standard cycles and you somehow manage to have her out of control within a handful of hours. Do you not see how important this is?”

There were mutterings, you guessed either an explanation or an apology of sorts, before Hux cleared his voice to speak again, this time closer to the door, and to address you.

“Commander Ren has informed me that he has somehow managed to injure you with that bloody stupid sword of his; and now instead of behaving like a sensible grown up, and having him escort you to the medicentre, you have chosen to lock yourself in there.”

Biting your lips your cheeks coloured white and then pink with embarrassment. How the hell was the man capable of causing such self-reproachfulness; even given how much you hated him an hour or so ago?  You had opened the door before he had even demanded it of you, shuffling your feet at him and doing your best not to fidget as you gazed at the suddenly very interesting floor. 

His gloves pinched at your chin and tilted it to the side to angle your collar bone into the light, an inaudible hiss as his fingers gently touched the skin around it.  Careful only to test the heat the burn had left behind, and not to disturb the wound.

“I will not be disturbed again; is that understood? Get her to medical Ren, ensure that that does not leave a scar. You mark her like that again Ren and I swear to all that is holy to you; you’ll wear stripes.”

You dared a timid glance over at Hux as he left you and with one final blank stare at you, pulled Ren over to him.  Pushing aside the gnawing sense of need, that you had wanted it to be him that looked after you as he conversed a sentence or two longer with Ren before leaving no other orders.  Returning back to whatever he had come from and leaving you once more on your own.  This time though with a worryingly, much humbler Commander Ren.

This was an unusually quick pass through the enemies medibay for you.  The injury simple to care for; Bacta patches applied and underneath them, a strange orange gel. One that the frightened medic had squeakingly assured the Commander, would ensure there was no scaring to you.  Once you were done, Kylo Ren escorted you back through the halls, stopping when you stood near the large open port probably meant for medical ships. 

You stopped, blinking in the light.  It had been so long since you had been outside that the smells of the outside seemed almost foreign to you now.  Pine and melting snow, mixed with the scent of unfiltered air, clean, cold; but fresh.  You almost took a step outside, before you remined yourself that you were not permitted such freedoms.  Shaking of the uneasy sense of claustrophobia and casting aside the longing for the open-space.  Following and impatient Kylo Ren, who retraced your steps with him, back to his quarters.

The rest of the day went without a hitch. Kylo Ren insisting on handing you texts and datapads for you to decide what training you’d require. You had looked through, some of it simple tricks you already knew; others skills you had not thought to master.  All of it mostly taking away your attention; even though you couldn’t shake off the endearing warmth that was growing at the occasional times you found yourself distracted and thinking back on when Hux had told Ren off.  There was something between them over this visit, that made them more competitive.  Then there was the black look Ren had shot Hux at the assumption from the General, that he had deliberately hurt you.  It was what you needed, there still was a divide and although it went deeper than yourself; you could exploit it. 

It was time for the sleep cycle when you were disturbed from the reading.  You were provided with your own newly acquired sleep wear; your clothing having been sent down, whilst you had still been in the medibay.  Discovering when you stood frozen on your return from the refresher, that Kylo Ren already in his sleep attire and that there was only one bedroom.  He offered no alternative as he pulled back the covers and so you offered at first to sleep on the couch.  But that was dismissed; and you were herded back towards the empty bed.

“I know that you sleep in the same bed as Hux, and I’m given to understand that that is not in any way sexual for either of you.”

The nonchalance was a calculated jab at you, designed to make you mad or desperate enough to rise to his bait.  To prove him wrong, that there was nothing more with Hux; or to make you blunder and admit there was something more than the small touches last night. Huffing, you climbed into the bed.  Ignoring his deliberately annoying attempts to help you settle. Laying on your back and ignoring him, until the lights were finally ordered off.  The darkness making you go in for your kill.

“You have to be honest with Adrianna.”

On and off, you had given it a lot of thought. His deception made you look the villain, and he had admitted you weren’t so you had figured that it was time to make a play to see how far it would get you.  You’d never understood why you and not here; unlike Adrianna, you had never wanted Ren’s attention and so that you had it made you unsettled.

“What will you give me if I do?”

He rolled over to you, feeling the telling ripples of the mattress as he inched closer. It took you a moment to register what he was getting at; and you almost balked realising that you had nothing else to bargain with but your loyalty to him over Hux; or sex.  You decided to play coy with him, you wouldn’t let him recondition yourself to him; but was sex the acceptable currency to get your sister back?

“I’ll give you nothing until you’ve done it.”  He was closer now, his breath ruffling your hair, unambiguous in his meaning. You kept the distaste from you voice; replacing it with the suggestion that you were in control here.  Hiding well your hesitation at it all, his body sliding against yours in the stark darkness.  Replacing your repulsion with a question. “What do you want?”

You had not been wrong in where this was going.  His hand cupped your cheek and tilting your shoulders back towards him, his thumb stroking you lips.  The pads of flesh smooth, but calloused, against the pliable skin. Whilst he lay flush to your side, rubbing a hardening bulge into the side of your thigh.

“One night and I promise not to hurt you.  But I want you sending back to him with the evidence of what I’ve done painted across your body; I want him to know I’ve had you.”

Your gut clenched at the thought of having to endure him touching you. But sex was the only currency for you left to play with, the only thing that would give you some measure of power.  He gripped you tighter and man handled himself over you.  His movements obvious in their subtlety, you could do this willingly or; he could take it from anyway.  Pressing his lips to yours,  

Whilst you didn’t return it, you allowed him this kiss.  Giving yourself time to think, rather than waste the moment struggling against him.  Knowing instantly what would be a sensible counter offer, you needed to see more of the base.

“You don’t touch me until then, and I get to go outside at least once this week.”

“That’s two requests.” You must have surprised him, for him to have stopped humping you. Stopping a moment to kiss your forehead, his curls ticking your nose where they fell against you. “How about, you get me off now, and I’ll take you outside tomorrow.”

He was so sure he would get his own way, that he was freeing himself from his sleep pants.  Swallowing you nodded, allowing him to take your shaky hand in his and reasoning that compliance was the best route to what you wanted here. Better you seem willing when there were no choices here, just ways to make his actions benefit you. 

Unaware; or more likely totally unconcerned by your reluctance, he pulled your fingers towards his waiting cock.  Manipulating your fist to cup his cock, firmly wrapping it around the stiff pole of heated flesh.  Slowly gyrating himself into your fist, as he pumped your hand with his own.  Something of the act sadly effecting your body, in ways that completely juxtaposed your thoughts.

His mouth moved to your neck as your hand pumped the smooth flesh, his lips hot and wet as they sucked over the column of your throat, his breath shuddery and definitely full of arousal as it hit your ear.  Trying again for a kiss, which again you permitted, but refused to reciprocate. 

He tutted at your reluctance, removing your hand with a flick of his wrist and pushing you over onto your back. Both your wrists pinned above your head as he climbed over you, nestling his cock between you both. The thin material letting the length press firmly between your slit.  He rolled his hips, rubbing himself against your clit, making it harder to hide the effect he was having on your body.  Each pass of his cock was making you slicker, the fabric of your sleep pants, gliding effortlessly over your sex. 

His mouth skimmed your shoulder, working its way to your ear, in swift nips and sucks.  Nothing hard enough to mark, but when his lips met the bacta patch he stopped. Hesitantly anointing the dressing with the unexpectedly tenderest of kisses, in a show of regret for the injury beneath it.  All whilst everywhere else, you were still unwillingly coerced to far worse, by his touches wincing at the effects he was having on you. Resorting in your fear, once more to the only thing you could use to settle your nerves.     

“So this is how you show your affections Ren, by forcing people.” You taunt had managed to hit home with him. Against your ear there was a low growl, though whether desire or annoyance, it was impossible to tell.  His hands gripping your hips and roughly forcing them bak down; making you realise that you’d been mid thrust too as he sniped back at you.

“But I’m not forcing you to enjoy it though, am I?”

This lack of control over your body was growing increasingly distressing. Suspecting for all it had been a while since they had been used, it was the drugs that had precipitated this latent difficulty in controlling yourself.  You would have wept at his taunt, had the man had not taken far more of your tears than he deserved.  Instead you lay still and breathed calmly; overriding your body’s natural desire that came with this friction. Your face turned away as he ran his nose over your ear. 

He didn’t like this less interested, more stoic you.  Pausing his own involvement, his throbbing sex, still heavy against your swollen clit as he uttered a deep warning. “You’ve two choices, the first is you let yourself go and enjoy this; and in return I will increase your outdoor visit to two sessions.”  He paused deliberately kissing a slow line up your neck. Working over your cheek, then your jaw and finally slowly back towards your mouth.  Kissing the corner and smirking against your lips.  His offer could benefit you and you were about to give in to your curiosity, when he spoke the second option against your cheek.  His offer was better than you could have hoped for; but you still had doubts. That was until he gave you his counter-offer and clarified how desperate he was to have you.  “The other is I make you enjoy it without the perks; and trust me little Jedi, I vert am skilled at making your kind do things they don’t think they want to.”

It was decided then and when his lips met yours; there was no hesitation.  You would orgasm if he kept this up, even without your enjoyment.  He wanted you to appear willing to flatter his vanity; and to get one over on Hux. This attachment, it could only further your advancement with him, to appease him now; but you could not appear too willing.  You spoke against his lips between kisses, your voice deliberately slight, with a touch of tremor in your whisper.

“Okay, but no sex.”

You felt him grin against you and knew it had worked; his hips renewing their efforts with long slow passes between the folds of your sex.  His baritone husky, even in its amusement at thinking he had won.  “I promise not to fuck you, until your due date to return to Hux.”             

You returned the kiss he gave you. Allowing him to sink his tongue between your lips and coaxing forth your own moans to join with his.  This time for the sake of the sham, you coaxed yourself to willingly rock your hips against him.  His huge hands sliding beneath you, each one pawing its own ass cheek and forcing you firmer against him.  Making you quiver with the additional stimulation and the tautness of your approaching climax.  His lips never leaving you for long. Whether pressed at your lips, or your neck; muted praises uttered against your skin, silent only when he listened to the sound of your breathing.  You were close, your body tensing, arching your back against the lips that now sought your clothed nipple and bit over it, his tongue flickering around it.  The final touch that had you screaming into his darkened chamber, triggering his own release and the blessed end of the session.  Permitting him to hold you as you slid into dreamland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two things to satisfy my curiosity.
> 
> Has anyone worked out why she prefers Hux over Ren?
> 
> Has anyone worked out the main plot twist yet? 
> 
>  
> 
> I'm hoping not, but they are related to one another.


	11. Hostage

General Hux, you had learnt by now had at least been consistent in his approach to you.  There had been punishments for your misbehaviour and rewards for good; and it had been easy to differentiate the two.  Your good behaviour was anything that pleased him; therefore, your bad behaviour had to be everything else. With Kylo Ren the rules were not so simple. There were punishments metered out to suit his current mood. Indifferent to whether you completed an assigned task to his satisfaction or not.  Therefore, with Ren, you never knew if an achievement would earn you his praise or a punishment. 

True to his word Ren had taken you outside the first day; and that had left you as confused as everything else. You were permitted a lengthy time outside, meandering aimlessly, amongst the huge evergreens of the forest until you had worn yourself out.  Then for some reason only he knew, you were then put through a number of physical exercises. Pushing you until you had been too tired to walk back, your repeated stumbling’s gave out how weary you were. Ignoring your angry protests that you had your own legs, he had scooped you up and practically threw you over his shoulder, to carry you; amused with your tired attempts to physically fight him off, for every step he took. 

From Hux, you would have suspected a reprimand for such behaviour, he would have been furious with you, for not respecting the limitations of your body.  Ren however just put you to bed without discussing it with you.   

In each and every one of his actions, he had proven himself to be a vile monster.  Lulling you to hope, then using you for his own ends that often, that you had expected a repeat of the night before.  Laid exhaustedly slipping in and out of delirium; but ready to defend yourself if he tried to do anything else to you that evening. 

He had slipped into the bedroom very late, not touching you as he stripped off and unabashedly walked naked to his bath.  He had not tried to suggest that you did anything else buy sleep on; but from the noises the man made as he bathed that was not because he was not in any way aroused. From the sounds of slapping water and heavy groans flitting through the half open door, he had taken care of any needs he may have had that night, himself.  When he finally got into bed with you that night, you had not bothered to feign sleep, just shown him coldness.  You had supposed that the moan he made as he came and murmured of your name, had all been for your benefit.  It was vile and disgusting, the General would never have been so crude. Keeping your back still to him, your lip curled in disgust at him, did the man really have no shame?

“Don’t be so stupid girl as to think he holds you in any regard, he would treat you the same as I do.” It was becoming more and more frequent, to have him once more dipping in and out of your thoughts.  In all honesty, it was becoming so common now that you almost forgot he was there. Well until he found something that would amuse him; and of late, that nearly always seemed to be at your expense.  “You should feel honoured, that I would look twice at Resistance Scum like you.”

You choked back the desire to either punch him or be sick and sensibly chose to try and rest.  Figuring that when he was trying to provoke a reaction, he was best ignored.  Dozing in stops and starts until your hunger woke you in the morning. Finding yourself so ravenous, that you hadn’t wanted to spend the time insisting on Hux’s more sensible diet for you; and instead had shared in Ren’s breakfast.  Eating that much of his rich protein heavy foods, that it left your stomach distended and sick with the weight. 

It had been mid-afternoon, before he could make a start on today’s training; this time your planned Force-training. Today working out how to put up the same barriers to your mind as those that had been placed there before your mission. Reasoning that once you were returned to the resistance, it would help your treachery to stay hidden from their telepaths and force adepts.

“It is much like Adrianna told you, imagine building a wall. You can construct it from any materials you want, but it must be as personal to you as your thoughts. Got it? Now keep it up as I probe it, for weaknesses.”

He had sat you opposite himself on a rug, cross legged and your eyes closed to help you concentrate.  Trying to hold back what was becoming tempest of hate, for the man opposite, so that you could learn these tricks.  They were vital to get Keeva to safety, and you’d be dammed if you would fail any challenge Ren put you through, to get her back. 

With deep, slow breaths you followed his instructions.  The wall solid in your mind, ready for all he knocked clean through it at the first attempt.  The second one was harder though and for all he got through, it had taken him a while to do so.  On the third though, something weird happened; a flash back of when you had been children.

Somehow you remembered little Keeva’s voice as she had explained to both you and Adrianna how to hide secrets from your parents, prompting you to try an experiment of sorts.  Remembering her instructions, you reordered your thoughts, placing the thought you wanted hidden somewhere else in your mind and leaving it unguarded as Ren probed for the missing thought.  He was straining this time when he broke through the barriers; and you were rewarded when you opened your eyes with the evidence of his exertion. Beads of sweat trickling down his temples and his breath stuttering as he spoke. 

“You were thinking about the plant you saw yesterday and the way it smelt when I handed you it.”

Your misdirection had worked.  You could have grinned in relief, realising not only that your plan had worked; but that he had also missed the whole of the memory.  It had been of something that you had seen whilst you were permitted outside yesterday.  The plants he spoke of, had been more he had chosen to show you. It had been very beautiful and strangely delicate compared to the other plants in the cold climate.  Small buds, who’s pollen had been a starkly bright blue; and had where it touched, stained the white petals the same colour. But what you had hidden from him, was that you had realised that it was the same colour blue, as the drug Hux had used.  The one that also seemed to work as an aphrodisiac.  You had guessed the connection, when it had created a very faint stirring of longingness in you as you had when instructed, sniffed it. Making you realise quickly, that the drug had somehow been a refined version of that plant; and that there was a reason Kylo Ren had shown you it.  

“Hardly worth hiding, try again. This time with something stronger, something that makes you want to keep it hidden.”

Euphoria rushed your veins at t, it was personally possible for you to hide your thoughts from the great, Jedi-Killer.  Making you eager to try again.  Another long exhale and you closed your eyes again; clamping down on the triumphant thoughts, lest he realise what you were up to.  Hard pressed to decide what you had left to hide that didn’t risk your mission and that you would be happy to risk him finding.  It took longer than you wanted, to think on one.  Deliberately choosing one that if he did crack, he wouldn’t like.  Readying yourself, closing your eyes and telling him you were ready and waited for the onslaught to begin.  Able to feel his attempts, but also his growing frustration, his outright paddy the final indicator that he couldn’t get past your walls.

“You have to be able to put it up at a moment’s notice.”  You were perhaps too over pleased with your progress. Proud of your abilities, until his hand shot out to the side of your head. His spiteful temper, pulling forth a different memory. Kylo Ren taunting you as he leant closer, the sheer length of his arms easily bridging the gap between you both.  His words spoken around his smirk; and making you quickly pull walls up everywhere.  Your defences so thinly spread, that it was only a matter of time until he found something to breech.  It was when until he touched you, that they lowered enough for him to access your recent thoughts.  Your struggle to stop him was over in an instant.  The revulsion thrown at him in chase of the thought he had stolen. The stolen confession hit him as hard as it had you; and you saw his jaw clench, right before you hit him.

“Isn’t that right,  _Kitten_.”

He mocked your anger as much as your struggles with him.  You were not yet to full physical health, even then it had been so long since you had fought someone of his calibre.  Had you of known before now your reaction, then you would have chosen to hide the moment, you realised the effect Hux calling you Kitten had on you, from him instead.  But you had not and so as he had spoken, you reached again to hit him.  All thoughts of a sensible fight gone as you resorted to tooth and nail; anything to hurt him.

He went straight for your throat, pinning you down in a movement that was getting old now.  You’d had enough of his posturing now, too many hours of living on tenterhooks for you to remain meek. Struggling to push the angry words coherently out from under his grip on your windpipe and refusing to remain still.

“You truly are a Monster Ren; you take what you want with no thoughts to anyone else.”

 “I haven’t taken you yet and I want that.  Should I then take it, with no regards to you?”

Your voice broke as you continued. To hell with worrying about seeming weak to him.  Both himself and General Hux knew that you were weak and tired. There was nothing to gain, they had brought you to this; you had nothing to lose. Letting pure emotions bleed into your voice as you spoke your own damning truth.

“You claim so often that the basis for my trust is that you were once the young boy who cared.  I truly think he is gone, he would have never even contemplated doing, to me what you threaten to do to me now.”         

Somewhere along your words you had stilled the sparks pricking the edges of your vision. All grip on consciousness finally fading as you searched his face. Your vision all but gone and ready to let go on reality until with a whoosh your air came back to you.  The sudden rush of oxygen more dizzying than the loss of it. Your head pounding as you looked with bleary eyes at him. 

Ren’s eyes said one thing; but his actions another as he leapt from you.  Leaving you completely alone in his chambers to mull over the training.  You curled up into the tightest ball you could manage.  Staring catatonically at the walls, not moving until nightfall; and then only to ignore the growl in your stomach, to climb into bed.

You awoke groggy and disorientated the next day. Still fully clothed from the night before, the weak winter light flittered in through the newly opened bedroom door.  For a while you just lay there, undeciding of if you wanted to get up or not, sat up to listen to the voices next door. One that of your sister and the other of Ren briefing her over journey plans.  You gathered from the gist of what you could hear, that she was being sent away with the other knights to lead a mission.  Your heart plummeting as you realised it would be against your Resistance and that there was nothing you could do to alert them.  The volume lowered and finally ceasing their conversation as they realised that you were awake; Adrianna walking into the bedroom and pointedly closing the door behind her. 

“I owe you an apology.” You startled at her words, quite sure at first, that you had heard her incorrectly. In the months you had been here, not one of your captors had offered you an apology; and given her devotion to Ren, you had not expected her to either.  “I am being sent away, and you’ll be returned to the Resistance before I get back.  I felt really awful for the other day; and I don’t want us to leave on bad terms.” You nodded at her; it was the best you could do given your differences.  She was still blindly loyal to Ren and as such you couldn’t trust her. But you were at least grateful for her regret over your argument the other day. 

Adrianna didn’t stay long alone with you, giving you just a simple squeeze of your hand before she left the bedchamber.  You deliberately dropped your walls at that touch, momentarily as a simple curtesy so that she could feel just how her apology had touched you.  Slamming them back up quickly in defence to close yourself off from her, just as quickly as she sought to touch minds with you.  There was too much you had to hide from her. The drive behind Ren’s talking to her was just one thought, you needed her to feel his were all genuine; you could not afford for her to see how much you were playing Ren.  There was one last watery smile from her, before she was gone completely from his rooms.  Leaving you alone to contemplate her blind devotion to this thing she called a Master and worry over how, if it was possible to undo it. 

“I thought we could train outside today.”  Kylo Ren was much humbler when he entered his bedroom clutching your breakfast.  A bowl with simpler fayre than the other meals, placed on the cabinet next to you. Kylo Ren was finally taking more consideration over your care, which seemed doubtful that he was doing so without a reason.

“So is this my second trip outside Ren, what do I have to pay if I would like a third?” You looked up at him scornfully, His jaw clenched and set ready to challenge your glare, as you watched him swallow.  Before he spoke levelly through clenched teeth.

“Nothing. This trip is surplus to the others, simply a kindness, a gift to you.  Do you want to train outside or not?” You took the food, agreeing to the outside session as you ate the food and pleasantly surprised you could finish it all without feeling ill.  You were getting better and better meant a step closer to being fully operational again.

Whilst you had been left in solitary meditation in the morning; in the afternoon he had dug out cold weather gear again. Helping you into yours before pulling practice sabres from under his cloak.  He kept his helmet on, but even with his face covered, you could sense his entertainment at your grimace, as you accepted one of the sabres that he held out to you. 

“This will do you good, give you a chance to let out some aggression.”

You had been apprehensive at first of why he was so willing to allow you near a weapon; more so at the fear of what should happen if you did well.  Yesterday when you had succeeded at the task that he had set you, Ren been that frustrated at your victory; that you were pretty sure that he was going to force you then and there.  So, you kept your attempts half hearted at first. Tempering your aggression until his hounding of you progressively picked up in tempo. His barbed corrections of your attempts to block him growing in hostile scorn, until he had you carelessly wild eyed assailed him. Changing your stance from pacifist blocking into speedily delivered parrying.  Physically you were too weak to win this, and no longer adept enough to keep him fully in check.  Stubbornness made you hold out until you were beyond breathless; pink cheeked at your exertion.   

As a result, a miscalculation on both of yours behalves sent the sabre colliding with your gloved hand.  The blade on these was turned down enough not to cut flesh, but not enough to stop a nasty burn to the side of your hand.  The searing heat making you screech, as you dropped your own to cradle the inured hand.  Ren throwing aside his sabre and muttering half formed curses in several languages.  Shoulder’s hunched as he reached for a nearby pile of half melted snow and bundled your knuckles into it.  The subsequent words he muttered were still half heard through the masks visor, but you gathered he was both sorry and fearful that it should leave a scar. 

But it was only when he removed his mask, to hold the numbed fingertips close to his warm breath that you felt your weariness. Kylo Ren pilling more snow on the back of your hand and shuddering, coffee eyes following the path to your own and unlike his voice holding no sense of fear.  At his questioning glance you passed his actions off as coldness, Ren insisting you both call it the end of the day’s activities, offering to take you back to the warmth of his rooms. 

There had been no warming fire, as there was in Hux’s rooms, but he heaped blankets over you as you settled onto a couch. Pouring you some hot coco to warm you up, as he ran you a bath.  That large tub of water; seemed to be the only luxury that Ren seemed to afford himself and now it had stood invitingly in the corner of his refresher; a towel laid out for you along with some soap. 

You slipped beneath the surface of the warm water, the heat turning your skin a deep lobster red, as you lifted the soap to you.  Its fragrance not one of Ren’s but not overly feminine either.  A definite hint of sandalwood, and cedar mixed in with the rose oil, and another floral scent that you couldn’t quite place but knew.  The water turning a violet blue as you soaped yourself and then dozing off, soaked longer than you intended. Your fingers and toes pruned when a knock and a call at the door both woke you and summoned you for the evening meal. 

He had turned up the temperature in the living area, the heat helping to dry your towel, tussled hair.  You were thankful for it, crawling back under your pile of blankets after eating, your tummy pleasantly full and happy to lay there.  Ren meanwhile had chosen to meditate after eating, insisting on giving you simple sabre exercises to watch on his holopad.  It had been late then, when he stirred from his straight-backed poise to declare it bedtime. Yourself scowling and refusing his offers to carry you to bed that night, yawning as you settled to sleep; permitted to sleep beneath the blankets on the couch.

You had been allowed to sleep on the couch the next three nights, the days spent exhaustingly training, the evenings resting your body; but not your mind.  Ren pushed you hard at all times, and you discovered that between that and the food, your body was slowly recovering.  Your sleep restful only because of how exhausted you were, so much so that you had almost forgotten his bargain with you. Not even considering it, until he tossed you a solid pair of outdoor boots for your training on the final day.  You already knew that you were to be sent back to Hux the following morning. Still unaware of his reason, or the speed at which you had been extradited from his chambers and not having heard from him since. 

Pulling your coat closed, you followed him outside, pleased to quickly see your physical health was improved enough that you did not need to take as many breaks.  Managing the walk back to the base with some measure of dignity, even if your gait was still slow.    

You were within the bases’ boarder, finding yourselves racing to get inside before a chasing snow cloud erupted over you; when you heard it.  You faltered and pursed your lips in thought, not sure that you had heard what you thought you had; but listening. Eventually you recognised it; there was a small high-pitched mewling coming from somewhere quite close by. 

You did your best to find the culprit.  Finding a small ginger tabby stuck on a branch of a one of the snow-clad trees.  You had jumped towards the first branch before Ren had caught the waist band of your pants, pulling you back down and away from it.  You wrestled yourself from his grip trying again, as he caught your arm, swinging you off and rolling down the embankment.  You reached the bottom, turning around to face him; furious with his callousness; pleading to return and take it with you.

“It’s a Kitten Ren, it won’t survive out here in with the Storm coming.”

“Leave it.”

“It’ll die in this weather.  Please let me get it, it’ll be no trouble to you, I can leave it on one of the hangers overnight.”

“No!”

The wind was picking up, blowing more leaves and small sticks at you; the dust and loose snow lowering your visibility.  You made a last lunge to get past Ren and return for the kitten.  Ren intercepting you and throwing you over his shoulder to race quickly back to the military instalment with you.

You never felt as wretched as you did that night.  Picking over the bits of your meal and listening to the wind howl outside; watching as the sleet and snow pelted the window hard.  You couldn’t shake the image of the small cat. Imagining it howling in the cold, struggling for warmth until it was too cold to even breathe.  It was sickening and you pushed away the food, practically untouched and took shuddering breaths. Glaring at the man opposite, who seemed to have no problems at all eating.

“It’s only a cat.”

“Only a cat, it was little, and weak, and defenceless, everything else I suppose you hate, right?”

For that comment alone you had reached for the plate and tossed it at Ren in your fury. Screaming as you leapt at him and your fingers did their best to squeeze, around the column of his throat.  His hands didn’t go to push you off, instead he just lay there laughing at your feeble attempts almost jeering at your concern. 

“You expect me to risk you in a storm, all over an animal!”

He let you hit him repeatedly, your blows doing less and less damage until you lay over him, sobbing at the futility of your sentiment.  You jumped when he went to comfort you, quickly sliding away and running for the security of the refresher.  You were not stupid enough to lock yourself away again, but you did require a moment to reassess yourself.  You took a long shower to calm yourself, scrubbing yourself down and furious at having to use his gifted soap; to need to take anything of his. 

You dried yourself off, before readying yourself for bed dressing in your remaining clean sleepwear. He didn’t give you long before he joined you, cutting you off in the bedroom, shutting the door behind him and beginning to strip off his clothing.  You startled at him shocked and bitterly remembering the agreement. Honestly after three nights allowed to sleep on your own, on the sofa, after the training; you had really thought he was beyond this stage. 

“I believe we made an agreement.”

You paused, feeling sick, as it hit you, he intended to keep you to your promise to let him molest you; to fuck you.  Now you were nothing less than gobsmacked, by his insistence that you stick to the agreement. Swallowing thickly and looking away, you found your fingers fiddling with a suddenly, very interesting seam on your left shirt sleeve.  He was bare chested now, down to the leather pants of his robes now, the suspender straps pushed down and hanging loose over his hips. You refused to look, as you heard the unfastening of his pants, the sound of clasps undone and leather sliding over skin.  

“Strip.”      

Your mouth dried completely. Your tongue darting to uselessly try to moisten your lips, looking up as he moved closer.  His head crooked to one side, he looked down the bridge of his noise at you, his hands reaching for the hem of your shirt.  He tried to lift it over your head, but as you shuddered, he tore it in two effortless jerks, then ripping the compression bra you wore off you too.  His fingers sought out your pants, but you stepped back and opened your arms to show compliance.  Removing them quickly before any more of your precious few clothing could be destroyed.  But your fingers still felt wooden and slow to respond, as you removed the last barrier to him. Your panties, joining the pile on the floor, leaving you now naked, vulnerable before him. Spluttering your protests not to do this as he walked behind you.

“I thought we mattered to you, that you wanted to protect us, why me Ren? Couldn’t you have found a different obsession?”

You kept reminding yourself that you had agreed to this, that despite having found no opening to escape from the base that this was the price you had chosen to pay. But it didn’t stop the shaking from your body as he grasped your hip and pulled you almost back to his chest, a finger walking down your bare spine. Brushing hair aside to kiss your neck, then pinching your skin between his teeth; leaving a peppering of red marks in their wake, his first message to the General. 

Now both his hands sought out your hips, kneading them and bringing you back against his chest.  The darkened curls of hair at his pelvis rough on the smoothness of your upper spine, the taught pectorals of his chest flexing with each heavy rise and fall of his chest.  His lips ghosting your flesh, whilst his teeth branded purple bruises onto your skin.  Each mark the deliberate taunt he had promised, backed by the hollower assurance that he wouldn’t hurt you. 

It felt somehow like a betrayal, had he only chosen to show you some kindnesses in the days that had passed, only to be trodden to pieces now. Or had when you had called him out on his callousness, hurt him enough for him to carry out his threat.  Had this been his plan all along; or was he teaching you a humiliating lesson?

His teeth set against your shoulder, nipping down your spine. Biting harder to draw your attention back to him, leaving a bite mark to each globe of your arse, before he turned you around to survey the unmarked flesh the other side of you.

“You hate the small harmless marks I place on you, more than these?” His fingers caressed your ribs, mapping the fading yellow, which marked each broken rib and then dipped lower. “But this is your preferred one?”

It was the scar on your inner thigh, from where the General had bitten through your skin. The only visible and permanent reminder you had from your earlier torture sessions.  Humming, he lifted your leg into the pale light and turned it so that the paler granulated tissue was easily determinable. 

He was up to something and frightened, you peered down at him as he rested your foot on his bended, knee.  His dark hair splayed over his shoulders and ticking your inner thigh. The gold flecks in his orbs, tinkling at the half light and searching your own for something indiscernible.  When you didn’t respond, he placed first a smooth chaste kiss against the scar then his lips parted on a second pass to suck at the delicate skin. Finally; and painfully, he held between his teeth to deepen his attempted mark.  Tears prickling wincing as you gasped in pain at it, your body flooding you with endorphins and your pulse streaming the lust filled chemicals, forcing them to every part of your nervous system.

With General Hux you had never questioned when your head was unable to fight the heady desires of your body; but with Ren it was still a distant source of humiliation to you. Eventually you gasped and threw back your head, gritting your teeth against crying out in pain and the other sensations.  Finally, your skin left his mouth with a loud pop. His eyes now glazed over and feral as he stood and moving forwards until he had pinned you between himself and the bed.

“You promised not to hurt me.”

“I did, didn’t I?” His voice rumbled deep from his chest and he sounded disinterested.  His eyes cold dark pits as he tilted your chin up.  His lips plump and swollen from the attack on your leg, pressing you for a kiss.

He was swift in his movements, picking you up to throw you on to the mattress. Removing his underpants; the last layer between you both, before laying on top of you.  Pressing you to the bed as his mouth once more attacked your neck and left more marks.  “But then you like pain, don’t you?”

It was not the same, it still was a violation of the agreement you had made. The only thing you had agreed to have covering you was his seamen, not these purple and red bruises.  You desperately tried another tact.

“Hux told you not to mark me.”

He flashed canines at that, his fingers pressing into the freshest mark he had just laid against your clavicle. Rubbing the teeth blanched flesh into a flattened red, smearing his saliva across the collar bone.  “Hux threat was that he wouldn’t be happy if I left you with a scar. He was not specific enough to suggest I didn’t leave you with semi-permanent ones; not would it have been a suitable demand to make for a prisoner.” He pouted in imitation concern as your gasped hopelessness, his fingers stroking your brow bones and dipping along the bridge of your nose in faked comfort.  “An odd oversight on his behalf, the General is usually so precise.  I wonder what could have distracted him.”

He knew what the General was distracted by, it was foolish to think that he would not know why you had to be moved here for a few days. But you had entertained yourself for hours, with the faint hope that at least one of the men, had some code of honour, that Hux wouldn’t have done this; but you’d be wrong.  If Hux had intended for Ren not to fuck you, he would have added it to the terms of your interment under Ren.  Now prickling tears formed at the realisation; no one was going to save you, there was no one left to help this time.

“Is this the only way you can get women Ren, to force them into fucking you.”

It was either your sarcastic noncompliance or cry; and you’d rather not.  Especially with the realisation now that you’d been a very stupid girl. But if your reminder that this was not happening willingly, had even registered with him, he recovered too quickly.  The wounded look you were sure you’d seen for a moment switched within the blink of an eye, to contemplation.

“I believe you entered into this willingly and even made your own terms to the agreement. You are letting me fuck you to thank me, for ingratiating you back into her good books; a request I carried out for you.” His finger trailed line along your hip bone as he spoke, lower still to the gap between the joining of your legs. “Do you know, what made her change her mind about you?”

His voice was a dangerous low pant edged with a tone of gleeful warning; heavily shot through with pride.  You knew instantly what he had done, it was painted in the shit eating grin he shot you and not lost in the deliberate sweep of his fingers.

“You fucked her didn’t you Ren.  You loathsome, piece of nerf shit, do you realise what that will do to her?” You struggled at that. Cross that he had slept with her and the emotional implications to her; and that you had not foreseen him out playing your manipulations.

“I enjoyed it, not as much as I think I will you though, you’ve a certain fire that she lacks. But in a pinch maybe, I’ll do it again, use her as a substitute until I get you back from your Resistance.”

Your hand connected with his cheek, tiny needles breaking out over your palm as it warmed to the sting.  He growled, and set his shoulders whilst you looked up; proud to see the imprint of your hand, crimson against his pale flesh.  It of course earnt you your own mark, your cheek bone darkening from the back hander he gave you.  The skin splitting at your lip and the tell tail throb of a bruise forming across your cheek bone.   

“You little bitch.”

There was a genuine shock in his voice, he hadn’t seen your blow coming.  A firm nod you realised, to the increasingly effectiveness of your shields. 

“Like I will be returned to you, dick head, I’m the Generals prisoner remember.”

You shrugged off the pulse at your cheek, your teeth tinged with blood as you bared them to him, your voice derisory. There was a false security in pretending Hux offered any protection from Ren; but right now you only had lies and deception.  You shut your eyes, wishing this was all over, was Adrianna’s safety really worth this much. A sister you’d barely seen for years, who’d literally lain with the enemy; who now would be harder to save.  

“Yes your precious fucking General!  You’d willingly fuck him right now, if only he actually wanted you.  Open your legs and give him what he wanted; and not even for the cause.” 

You lost it completely at this more than you’d ever done before with Ren.  Nails and teeth seeking any patch of skin they could find, almost ripping hair from his scalp.  He really was pure poison; and you wished you could choke him to death. 

“Why the fuck us Ren, why the hell are we so important to you.”

He pinned your arms and you took satisfaction in the fresh scratches decorating his body. Ren ignoring them to leer at you, kicking your legs apart and switching his grip to pin your wrists with one massive fist. His cock still as stiff, despite your attack on him, as he laid his massive frame over yours.  His fingers trailing back to settle between your legs, his voice anything but monotone as he slipped one inside you and sighed at finding you wet.

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“No, not really.”

Your voice quivered, whilst his fingers slid over you, your heart strumming in your ears.  Your body was too responsive, far so more so than it should have been even you’re your heritage.  You thought back to his threat on the first night about being able to make you do as he wished.  _‘I am skilled at making your kind do things they don’t want to.’_  It wasn’t an idle boast, you thought biting your lip as you stifled a moan and breathed deeply to calm yourself. Your gulped air, driving the scent of your soap through your nostrils; he knew exactly how to do this.

“You come from a long line of Force-sensitives.  As far back as we can chase your records, your family has never failed to produce strong Force-users.”

It all hit at once, the familiarity of the scent in the soap you couldn’t place; it matched the flower outside.  All his reasoning’s for playing you off against your sister; even now this was a test, one to see how willing you’d be; he was playing a deeper game.

“You want us as breeding stock?”

It felt disgusting to have to think it; let alone voice that realisation.  The idea of being reduced to nothing more than the sum of your parts, for him to have decided such a vile use for you; for your sisters.  Ren seemed anything but disgusted though as he nodded, taking a deep breath and scenting both your own fragrance; and that of the plant’s nectar in the soap.  The black of his pupils, almost threatening to swallow his irises, as he rubbed himself against you, his body shuddering in the throes of his desire.  Whatever that plant was, it affected him too. 

“Eventually yes, but you will serve another purpose first.”

His sentence was broken, each word, each complex syllable disturbed, by a kiss trailing your body.  Dutifully you spread your legs as he reached your cunt, your mind screaming in a failed desperate attempt to fight the drug and the finger that ran between your sex; whilst also reasoning that compliance was also wise.  

“So why send me back to the Resistance, if my womb is so fucking useful to you?”

You squirmed, his fingers flicking easily over the slick surrounding your clit; his breathing almost as shuddering as his fingertips.  Right now, you weren’t sure now what was turning him on more; your fear and distaste for your body’s betrayal, or the drug.  He moved; his mouth replacing his fingers and your hips involuntarily bucking as he sucked your clit into his mouth. Talking his time before answering, his fingers keeping up what his tongue couldn’t.

“Because we need what you hold inside you, stored somewhere in that pretty little head of yours.”

He pulled apart you apart further with his hands, exposing your clit to one last kiss before he moved back over you.  His hand lazily pumping at his cock, before he set it against you in both warning and threat, lazily running it through your folds before tilting his hips.  You flinched, trying to jerk away and plead once more not to do this.  His brow raising as a reminder to stay still; after all you too had deemed this a worthy price to pay. 

He groaned as he slipped his head inside you, just mere inches. Holding a moment, before he pulled it out again, teasing himself repeatedly.  You rolling your head to the ceiling as he slid inside again, and tangled fingers in your hair.  Pulling your head where he wanted it, making you look at him and wait.  Your breath held still, as he pushed himself this time, balls deep inside you; setting a slow pace, enjoying watching you try not to writhe beneath him

“How the hell would you know what it is Ren? Even I wasn’t informed of its details.”

He rolled his eyes at you, as he brought his hips back. Smirking at your control, aware despite all your attempts, that you couldn’t appear this disinterested for long. .     

“Because it makes perfect sense, the great Ahsoka Tano comes out of hiding, just as Skywalker tries to establish a new Jedi order. You’re carrying a compiled list of the galaxies, Force-sensitive children; and I will need that too.”

Your shock winded you, the nip to your bottom lip brining your thoughts back to face him.  He had to be wrong you couldn’t possibly be carrying such a thing; it was an impossibility for such a thing to exist.  But somehow your gut feelings told you that he right, everything about Ahsoka’s behaviour over the last few years had pointed to it.  A tapping at your cheek drew your attention back to the man whose cock was currently buried in your cunt.

“You made an agreement.”

You nodded, keeping your attention on him.  It took a few more thrusts to return your body back to its previous state.  Sweat dripping from his chest as his pace increased, his mouth on your ear, the lobe sucked between his teeth.  He pounded hard into you; showing you no mercy. Digging his hands in at your thighs, and opening them, to spread your legs wider to him, his head slipping down to you shoulder.  His fingers grazed your clit again and you looked at him, wide eyed that he would do this, you failed to see why it would matter to him.  He strained to get the words out to you, so close to finishing; perhaps an excuse as to why you had to enjoy the torture.

“The drug, increases in effect the longer it is in a Force-sensitives system, the chemicals released at orgasm help soothe it.”

You weren’t sure that you should have been that grateful for knowing that, but something akin to relief struck as you realised, that that gave you a safe reason to give in.  It was a heartbeat or two before you realised just how close you were already, your cunt tightening around his cock and a hissed groan of relief rang in your ears.  Your teeth gritted, as his fingers refused to let up even though you had cum, trying desperately to escape his grip on your over stimulated clit and pleading for him to stop.  He refused to let up though, until you spilled again. Almost a broken sob escaping him as he scrambled to his knees, his thumbs spreading your jaw and his cock plunged into your mouth, so that he could pour himself down your throat.

He gave you little time to rest, that night.  True to his word sending you back to Hux, covered in a cloak, but his cum slicking your body; the marks of what had happened everywhere.

  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler. 
> 
>  
> 
> This is only a threat of pregnancy. Don't assume it will follow the other works.


	12. Broken Arrow

The walk back to Hux’s chambers the next morning, would have been degrading enough, even without the coated fluids from Ren flaking and laying itchy against your skin. He had taken you repeatedly, allowing you little in the way of sleep.  Small dozes during his refractory periods.  His refusal to cum inside you ach time, had purely been to enable him to parade the evidence of your coupling to General Hux. But right now you were thankful for his childish temperament; that and your contraceptive implant.  That and that, the closest he had come to desecrating you internally again, was a final tired wank over your cunt. Ren ordering you to stay still on his bed, whilst he washed up. 

You supposed that you should be grateful that he loaned you a cloak to wrap around you, for the short walk back to Hux’s chambers. Wrapping it around you like a loose dress as you walked through the corridors, your head held high and clutching the material tight to cover you.  You refused to show emotion, refusing to look ashamed, whilst pretending nothing had happened.  The week of Force training had begun to reopen your mind to your powers, and now you blocked out the thoughts of those around you. Ignoring the open leers and verbal mutterings that you could not shield yourself from.

You were physically shoved through the door and into Hux’s quarters, the cloak ripped off you as you stumbled into the living area.  Quickly your hands flew to try to preserve yourself some kind of modesty, swatted aside by Ren.  His look purely triumphant glee as he presented you and what he had done to you to Hux.  

Clearly you were some sort of sick trophy for Ren, another pawn in their game for supremacy.  General Hux though, refused to acknowledge either of you verbally at first. The only exchange between the two First Order leaders, in your presence was a smug look from Ren to the seated General.  Hux refusing to so much as grace him with eye contact, continuing to show his sole attention to his data pad and his work until Ren had left. 

Surprisingly, you found that you were grateful to be back under General Hux’s care; even if you had learnt that you were not as important to him, as perhaps you had stupidly thought yourself.  These rooms were your only escape from Ren.  Even if it was, as your gut reminded you after Ren’s assurances last night, only temporary.

“I am under no illusions that Ren has decided to fuck you, so go clean his filth off yourself.”

He didn’t even look at you to speak, and humiliated, you slunk off to his refresher.  Your heart sore and aching for some semblance of the tenderness Hux had displayed the night that he called you Kitten.  Finding that there had been a bath ran whist you were away, the water still warm and unused.  Hesitantly you assumed the waiting bath water was for you.  The bath a little too hot; but offering the cleanliness that you desperately needed as you climbed in quickly.

Laying back and sinking welcomingly into the heat, the bath scented with herbs and floral elements, all of it soothing your sore skin and muscles.  It was good to finally be able to cleanse the residue saliva and cum from your soiled body.  But this comfort did little to rinse the memory or the smell of sex from your nostrils; nor was it likely to.  He had placed a gritty scrub next to you, and you rubbed far harder than intended against your soiled skin. You swore that you could smell it, even after repeatedly submerging yourself with every implement there was in the bathroom. 

“I have left you clothing on the side.”

You opened your eyes, his sudden presence making you jump. Deciding not to cover yourself up, but instead wear your bruised with the same indifference as he saw them with. 

There was something so hurtful even about the lack of distaste on his face, as he looked you over.  Still no discernible emotion, as he flicked his gaze over the marks on your body, his hair dampening at the roots.  How long had he been watching you for; and why was this not affecting him as Ren had predicted it would.  Making you wonder, had you once more been returned to the Resistance filth that was not fit to receive his regards; or had he really been indifferent all along.  You thought the latter; but then there was something more than his regulation stiffness, when his eyes roamed the floor.  Almost like he was lost in a thought, pausing a moment with unfocused eyes, before leaving you alone again. 

Beneath the surface of the water, your fingers touched your thighs.  The bruises covering your skin throbbing, as they deepened colour in the rapidly cooling water.  The marks speaking volumes on Ren’s actions and emotions; but leaving you no clearer on Hux’s feelings of the situation.  The Commander feared for Hux to have control of you, especially if it threatened his plan for you.  The water was well passed lukewarm, when you got out of the bath.  Your skin still reddened and sore in places as you dressed in the clothing General Hux had laid out for you.   Your personal belongings hadn’t yet been fetched over from Ren’s quarters; and so, it was the General’s own clothing that was laid out for you.

There was food on the table when you finally summed up the courage to stop hiding in his bedroom.  General Hux seemed so edgy with his snapped holo-commands and muttering around typed documents. Still unwilling to look at you, and you with your head hung low at the shame of it all; did Hux know you’d agreed to sex with Ren.  Had Ren told him your price, it seemed so cheap now.  You were left to eat in peace, General Hux still busy with work; yourself not at all hungry given the last few cycles. The food was cold too, but you ate it anyway, so desperate to somehow try and please him. Like a kicked dog, too desperate to earn his notice. 

You knew now, that there had been a long-term plan and that had never been to leave you permanently with General Hux.  So if you failed in your escape, and were returned to the First Order, you would be gifted straight to Ren.  Eventually becoming his brood mare, breeding stock you thought bile rising as the thought that you’d now dragged your sisters into this.  Swallowing thickly, you pushed your plate away; you would throw up if you ate anything more.  General Hux not giving you long, before you were instructed to return to his bedroom, sitting you down on his bed as he informed you that he would be leaving you for a little while.  The need to please him, was all a bit pointless now, but the longer he refused to look at you, the more you simmered with resentment at his ignoring you.

“Look at me!”

You had not meant to yell that at him, now his chilled gaze snapped to you. Pale eyes focused on you, his features as cold and unreadable as your first day in interrogation.  He still did not speak with you, reaching to attach the chain to your ankle.  His whole smell washing over you and the memories of the comfort in it, catching you between delirium at him and outright wanting to slap him. 

“Have I somehow managed to disappoint you by sleeping with him?” This time you got an answer, though not the one you wanted; his voice kept a carefully calculated mix of hardened steel and pure indifference.  His chosen wording doing nothing to help you calm down; but then you truly doubted he was caring about your feelings enough to be trying to.

“I fail to see how I possibly could be; it was I who chose to send you to Ren’s quarters and I see that you have returned in one piece with very little issues; anything else that happened there would be hardly of concern to me so long as you failed to cause me any further headaches from your behaviour.”

You gritted your teeth, taking a deep breath to calm down from the sudden rush of pounding heat; he was being so obstinate; but you knew something had bothered him.  His breathing was all wrong for a man who was supposedly that calm over what had happened with Ren. You were anything but calm, the desperation creeping into your words. “So you still sent me there knowing that he was likely to try something like this.”

General Hux’s voice was quiet, but the wording was not contrite. “I knew that Ren was dangerously obsessed with you; but that was a risk I found it necessary to take.”

Ginger hairs fused together, as his brow knitted, frowning as he lifted your chin to him and began rolling your head slowly from side to side.  His eyes once more searching the marks laid out on your neck, almost counting each bruise.  His reply had been too quiet in tone, making you want to roll your eyes at his reply, and punch him into some sort of activeness.  This indifference was strained, even for him; his behaviour was making your hackles rise, despite your attempts to stay calm.  You knew that he was too perceptive to have misunderstood you; you didn’t mean that at all.  You shook your head at him, amazed he couldn’t be that stupid, he had to be ignoring it.

“No. You knew that he would do this, you are far too calculating not to have considered it.  Doesn’t it bother you that he did it to hurt you more than he did me?”

“In that case it would be fair to say that his attempts to goad me, simply imply that Commander Ren believes that in the short time you have been here, I have formed a level of regard for you that I have not.”

He winded you with the callousness of his reply, making you sickened at his denial of an attachment to you.  Your hackles finally giving out to stone cold fury and leaving behind your common sense; you needed to hurt him now, just as much as he was doing to you.

“Tell me then General, was it planned all along, was my treatment by him just another way to get you off, did you enjoy imagining me with your boyfriend.”

He back handed you out of nowhere, knocking you to the floor with the force of his blow.  You went to spit the bloody phlegm at him, but he kicked you.  Knocking the wind clear out of you and your spittle sliding uselessly across your cheek. His face red with fury as he gripped your cheeks, pinching them painfully between his fingers and forcing you to look at him.

“Have you forgotten everything, that I have taught you 22758?”

Your nails dug into his exposed wrists to free yourself, gouging pale skin from him, leaving little pinpricks of blood in their paths.  He hit you again, waiting for you to recover your balance, before slapping the other cheek; your ears ringing as he spoke again this time with plenty of emotion in his voice.

“Attack me again and I’ll send you back to him bloody.”

That was not a warning it was a growl, telling you he was not as in control as they wanted, you took a chance.  Pushing for the answer you needed, enough with his postulating, and preening; you knew he wouldn’t send you back to Ren.

“Admit that you don’t want me and I’ll go back to him willingly.”

“Will you please cut, with this childish posturing, it doesn’t matter what anyone wants.”

He had his temper back under control; the answer was not want you wanted; you needed him to be honest, that hit had carried more truth than his words.  You blinked, suspended in time for a moment; this was not even an answer, just another refusal to rise to your bait.

He used your silence to shove you away and off the bed. Your head hitting the floor, stars crowding your vision.  You waited for his admission, but it never came instead he just knelt over you, chest heaving. Breathless from his exertions, he took a deep sigh and suddenly looked beyond weary; so many emotions in such a short period for a man who still claimed not to care. 

“Did he finish inside you?”

He spoke nervously on the topic. Either from his attempts at being civil again; or risking an answer he didn’t want to hear. Either way you spluttered, unable believe of all questions he had asked that one.

“What the actual, fuck?”

You bit back the rest of your choice of expletives; and he let your vulgar language go this one time, your cheeks however still stung from the last blows.  This was such a change in topics, that your brain took a moment to process the question. Your cheeks heated, stunned that after his posturing it would even matter to him; so unusually quiet that in time he repeated it again, this time slower and clearer on his meaning.

“When he came, did he do so inside you, or near enough to risk a pregnancy.”

You shook your head, titling yourself away from him and onto your arms.  Your previous train of thoughts now completely derailed as you looked to the floor.  Your face paling as you uttered your denials; this was none of his business. 

“It won’t matter; I have an implant.”

You hoped you had an implant; they’d never told you that it had been removed or disabled.  Now you weren’t sure what to expect, especially given where this change in questioning.  You were pulled back to him, his face still a blank page as he took a pill from his pocket, holding it out to you in offering; not even explaining what it was for.  “Then it is better to be cautious.” You opened your mouth like some trained pet, for him to place the pill, on your tongue.  So desperate now either to see something of his regard, or if you could not for blessed numbness; that you would risk this being a ploy, an attempt to give you more sedatives. Swallowing before he explained what it was. “I wouldn’t put him past him, to already have it disabled.”

You understood now what it was and considered his actions.  Did Hux give you the pill now, because he knew it was inactive; or because he truly didn’t trust Ren.  Could you have managed to divide them enough that they no longer functioned as a unit.  You’d never considered this as a possibility from your imprisonment, so your implant status had never been of concern to you.  In your haste, to speak you swallowed the pill without water, choking when the pill stuck fast to the back of your throat.  Hux swiftly providing you with a mouthful of water, placing the glass close by and then checking over your restraints before turning to leave you. 

“I won’t let it happen to me.”

You voice was still full of definite resolute; despite the little coughs you gave as the water cleared your throat.  If Hux had any opinion on your determination he didn’t show it. Tilting his head as though to consider something foreign to what you had said, before openly shrugging at you, as he extradited himself from his bedroom. 

He would of course leave you alone now in solitude, the chaos inside of your head making you run over and over your interaction with him.  It was odd, him giving you that contraceptive; it was the first time he had ever openly, defied Ren.  It was such a back handed way, to prove who was in charge of you. Almost caring perhaps had he not have admitted he had guessed what Ren would likely do with you. 

With nothing else to do, you snuggled down under a blanket. Unsure why it comforted him so much, but glad at last for a different smell to Ren.  For all of its sterile cleanliness his bed smelt very much of Hux, of his aftershave and skin and you breathed deeply curling around his pillow and stroking at the stitched corner as you debated over which of your thoughts was correct. Eyes closed until you sensed another presence in the room and jerked yourself away from the pillow.

Your heart leapt as he stood, watching you as you lay under his covers.  His eyes bore into you as you stared back, placidly eating into something that slashed you deep inside. Following you as you lay onto your back and pulled yourself up to sitting, your lips parting as you took a deep breath to steady yourself.  Fearful for either of you to speak your minds; to ask the question that was truly bothering you. This time quiet and reserved; everything he was not, not intending to goad him this time but desperate in your quest for his answer.

“Kylo Ren believes that you care for me; but it’s an impossibility isn’t it.”       

Hurriedly he moved; and the spell was broken.  Stripping off his uniform and pulling exercise clothes from draws, his back to you as he stepped into a pair of slacks not unlike the shorts that you wore.  Deflecting your question by asking one of his own.

“Shall we just cut straight to the problem, I have somewhere I have to be.”

There were many questions, but little time and it was his betrayal of you that smarted the most.  You didn’t mean to sound as needy as you did, the words somehow coming out all wrong and Hux shooting you a look of pure frustration.  You were holding him up and he clearly had more pressing things to do than to give comfort to a prisoner.

“You left me.” He rolled his eyes at your distress, leaving you to swallow back the lump in your throat; ignoring the trembling in your fingertips as he looked at you.  General Hux wasn’t built up like Ren, his frame less bulky, more smooth muscles over angular bones; but that did not mean he was any less capable physically; you were too calm to risk attacking him now.

“I had a visitor, one whom I could not risk you around.  You have a habit of not being the safest of guests”

You contemplated his reasoning, watching from the bed, as he pulled on shoes.  It was too blatantly obvious that his visitor had to of been a civilian.  Nobody military based would have broken protocol, to surprise him by invading his personal chambers; and they would not have required the use of his bedchamber.  It was too hurried; Hux hadn’t known to expect them, nor to have to move you. Leaving you with Ren was hardly a wise move; but the only move left for him.  Someone had forced his hand. 

“So not a military visitor then, a personal one?”

Your voice dropped, as suspicion took over; still trying to work it out. It had been sensible up until now to think his preference so far had been to males, that he kept Ren as a lover suggested it. But he shook his head when you asked who he was, leaving you to the understanding his visitor had been female. Eyes narrowing in jealousy at him, the visitor had to be important to him for him to not turn her away and you registered the fleeting look of dread in his eyes.  Whoever she was his comment about keeping you away had been a lie; he wasn’t worried about his visitor; he was ashamed for her to see you. It had to be someone close, you suggested Mother first, but he shook his head again and walked away as you shouted after him, as he left the room.

“Which is she then, a sister or a lover?!”

His voice came from the living quarters and forgetting your bonds, you went to follow him and demand answers. The chain snapping taught before you could reach to him, reaching the end of its length and jerking you suddenly to your knees; skinning your shins as you yelled stupid demands for an answer.

“Which is she Hux?!”

“It is none of your business!”

It all was beginning to make sense; nothing took much to work it out at this stage.  You knew from previous incidents that he was at least sexually attracted to you; he just wouldn’t give himself permission to act on it.  Which was just adding to your suspicions that he was ashamed of you, he wouldn’t have needed to clear his rooms for a sister and he had no time for a lover; so who was his visitor.  Now you were near hysterical, no longer disputing your jealousy of his visitor to yourself.  Your stomach aching with the realisation of what you had done to yourself; this was your enemy, the man who had murdered billions.  You had no business yelling what you did next; there was no need to admit to this level of stupidity. Yelling an incoherent rant through the bedroom doorway and into the living quarter.       

“I’m your dirty little secret aren’t I? Fuck, I’m right look at you, kriff, you think your so above Ren, so unaffected by your own emotions don’t you.  He spent all week hinting at it and I just didn’t see it; but your just as effected by all of this as I am.”

His wounded look turned in a flash to anger; then back to a barely kept calmness. Too sensible not to keep the anger out of his voice and keep his distance; but not reasonable enough to keep quiet.  

“There is absolutely nothing to hint at; the man is riddled with ideals and misplaced sentiment.  You are nothing to me, but my prisoner; eventually you will be my soldier, and I will be your General, but there will be nothing more.”

Your teeth ground with his refusal to give you a straight answer.  It had all been there, Ren’s need to fuck you had been more than just a personal jab at Hux for his reprimand; none of this was making sense. “So I won’t be given over to Ren as a brood mare, then?”

General Hux huffed and rolled his eyes as he placed something on the coffee table. “I have no say in the final outcome for you, I am bound by my supreme leader’s wishes.”

You lost it at his control again; screeching like a mad woman possessed; still determined to wound him.  “You fucking lied to me and I hate you!  I hope you rot in hell. Your weaker than he is, at least he can admit it, you fucking stuck up, pretentious little prick.”

“Calm yourself, or would you prefer he had regular access to you?” With that roar he was gone in an instant, refusing to answer you.  The doors to his quarters sliding closed and leaving you shocked and alone.  Your heart hiccupped as you realised what you had done, what it all meant.  Your body shook in great tearless sobs, your chest screaming in pain.  You’d miss judged him, badly.  You couldn’t work out now, where you had thought this would take you.  How trying to prod him into action, could have ever worked; he really was too proud, and you really were resistance scum to him.  

But the door to his quarters hadn’t even closed, before he returned. Jaw clenched tight and fists curled; heading straight to you.  It was all too much, the torture had tuned now, too personal for you to box it away somewhere in your mind, you were made far too emotional, by your attachment to him. 

“Why keep me here like this; why do this to me if I mean so little to you.  Admit it, you hate that he had me, don’t you?”

Couldn’t you let anything go; why did you have to keep prodding the beast.  You tried shuffling back as he marched towards you, his face still motionless, there was fire in his eyes. At last a passion that threatened to liquify your bones and leave you out to dry; your legs refusing to work for you and comply to your demands to run or fight.  Forgetting to breathe even, as you stood routed to the spot, flinching as he lunged at you, quicker than you had thought possible; but not as you had expected to strike you.  Tangling his fingers into your hair and with no warning, brought your neck to his mouth.  Sharp teeth closing over each and every mark he could find. Sloppily covering each one of Ren’s marks, with a deeper one of his own; his own marks added in places he was unsure of.  Grunting as he pushed you on to the bed, ripping off your top as he rolled you over onto your stomach and bit again. 

He was far rougher on your back, and you couldn’t tell if it was blood, or his tears that wet it. His teeth sinking in so deep in places you knew from the sting, that he had broken skin again. Turing you, so there wasn’t a mark on you he didn’t cover, each one finally an answer to your question.  But it was as he reverently, reached for the last mark, the one to your thigh, that you finally spoke.  Your voice shaky with endorphins, as you watched his lips seal around your leg, your heart thundering as he removed them to reveal a fresh mark.

“You let him have unfettered access to me for a week Hux.”

Spittle hit your neck, as he roared, shoving your face into the pillow. Beneath him you flinched, eye wide and fearful, closing them and rolling protectively back onto your stomach as he yelled; the fear still there despite his words.

“And I hated every dammed, moment of it!”

You lay there unable to open your eyes, stunned by the intensity of his reply. Only daring to open your eyes when he pulled your hair over your shoulder.  Your voice less than a murmur; more of a promise that you whispered to yourself than to him.  One you vowed to keep any way that you needed to, should it come to it.

“I’d rather die than let him have me.”

You didn’t think he heard you, until he brushed your spine and lowered his head to you. An equally as quiet ‘no’, spoken against your skin; the closest you’d come to a kiss.  His hair ticking your overly sensitised skin, as he pressed his forehead to your back.  His voice hoarse, strained from his withheld emotion.

“He can’t have you.”

He tensed at his admission; one that you guessed he had not meant to share with you; and pressed you to the bed.  Springing from the bed and rushing from the room, this time leaving for a good while. The door chime to his chambers telling you that you had been left alone.

You silently lay on your front. Bruised and unable to bear the feel of anything against your stinging back and it seemed like an eternity before you forced yourself to walk to the refresher. Washing your face, before turning to look at yourself in the mirror; gasping at what you saw.  Your back was a mess. Covered in red and a purple so dark it was almost black; punctured in more places than one, by his teeth and smeared in places with blood.  It hurt and the swelling made the skin feel tight, but it was a good pain. The marks Ren had placed had been claimed, they were Hux’s now. 

You had rooted in the cupboard and fished out an antibacterial spray for the broken areas.  The substance loaded with enough anaesthesia to take the edge of the throbbing, returning to the bed to try and claim some rest.  

The door chime rang making you jump; you had not been expecting him back so soon.  Nor were you expecting the bag of ice, that he had fetched back for you.  General Hux taking the time to wrap it in a towel, before laying it gradually over your swollen back.  The bitter cold making you, tense before your body gave into it and enjoyed the numbing relief, hissing where the melted water managed to seep through and into the spit skin. 

“I lost it, sorry.”

He lay himself down next to you.  Smoothing hair from your freshly washed face, his eyes searching for something in yours. You nodded your acceptance, dumbfounded by his regret and once more became the broken, quiet thing he was gradually shaping you into. Closing your eyes as the tears slipped through your closed lids and you shuffled closer to him.  Trying not to dislodge the ice, but your fingers slowly twitching, as you reached out to his chest.  The General flinching at your approaching fingertips, blocking them like they were bullets heading at his heart and ensuring they were not allowed to reach your goal.  His fingers loosely encircled your wrist, holding it inches from the heat of his chest as your lip quivered at your question. 

“If I touch you, will you hurt me?”

“Yes.”

You blinked, not sure how you should respond to such an honest, straight answer.  But it was the kiss to your fingers that threw you, making your throat clench as you fought hard to swallow.  Risking another question. “You knew what he intended to do with me once he knew who I was, didn’t you?”

He shrugged, not indifference as it had been before, but a weary sadness. “It was always going to be, the most profitable outcome for him.” Your body shuddered as you tried to breathe through the reclaimed sobs, your voice a little over a whisper, your admittance to yourself, staining your heart raw.

“How long have I been compromised for?

He took a moment; and kissed your fingertips again. Still refusing to let you touch him, but so gentle in his refusal as he lowered your hand back to the bed. “We both are compromised, Kitten.”

It wasn’t your answer, nor was it a fair and exact exchange of what you felt. But it was the most you could openly admit to now; and from him it was a tsunami of truth. Waiting whilst you sobbed again; but still refusing to touch you; or offer any physical comfort.  waiting patiently until you had allowed yourself to look at him again.  Holding your gaze, before speaking an assurance.  “I won’t let him have you, that much I promise you.”

You smiled wirily; the truth too impossible, too alarming to admit to either of you. It would be folly to think that you were stupid enough to believe that Hux would disobey his Leader; or be able to keep you from Ren.  He was first and foremost a soldier, so if he was told to hand you over; he would.  He was too obedient to his Order, too loyal to his Leader.  But the intention behind that promise was all he could give you, the wet still there in his eyes, his broken honesty; for now, it would have to be enough. Your breath was slow and heady as he continued; and you allowed yourself to pretend that there was comfort in pretending.  To know finally that he unlike Ren was human; that he wasn’t as heartless as you had first thought him.  A bitter laugh sounding before you managed to find the words you had been thinking.

“Don’t promise me stuff you can’t keep General, we both know that if I come back, I'll be given to him.”

“You will not be returning; ever Kitten. He cannot have you.” There was certainty in his voice when he spoke; his promise as confident as if he was giving a command.  You allowed yourself to be taken in by him, figuring he fooled himself too, but wanting so much for it all to be real.  Giving him the weakest of smiles, you closed your eyes whilst he lay there next to you. Imagining you were both just ordinary people and that you were somewhere else, that there wasn’t this whole war raging around you both. 

Sometime in the evening you woke, your back less painful but very stiff and cold.  The sheets wet through from the melted ice and uncomfortable against your skin.  Ignoring the damp, you pulled on the soft jumper he had laid out for you.  Your feet padding against the bare floor and into where General Hux sat working. 

He looked up at you as you came in, and you quickly ran your fingers through your hair, a softness reaching his eyes when you gasped down at the rug.  There curled up before the firelight, on the pale furred rug, was the orange tabby that you had seen that day with Ren.

“You were watched at all times; I refused to leave you fully alone with him.”  You shot him a half smile, before reaching down to coo over the kitten. Pleased that unlike Kylo Ren; General Hux really did have a sense of fairness. To leave an animal weaker and smaller than himself to fend for itself in such helpless odds would have been cruel. “I am still not entirely sure how she had gotten all the way out there, but the officer shadowing you picked her up before the storm hit.”

“Does she have a name?”

“Not yet, no.”

You mulled it over and looked around the room. From the food bowls placed near the small sink, you gathered that he was obviously keeping her.  The tell tail signs where everywhere when you thought to look for her. 

“She will need a name, Sir.”

“She does, doesn’t she.”

He made a noncommittal reply to your enquiries for suggestions.  Returning his attention back to his work and ordering your evening meal.  This gentleness; this kindness was worth a thousand of his assurances and it brought warmth to your mid-section. You wanted to; no you would have hugged him, if his earlier warning hadn’t of been so fresh in your mind.  It was one thing to admit he wanted you, to show you small kindnesses like this in private, but it was a given, that he would not be allowing himself to act on it physically.  It wasn’t in his nature to sleep with the enemy for his own personal fulfilment, he still thought himself above that. What once was seen as part of controlling you, had become personal to him now to make it about the Order and he lessened himself in his eyes. 

The rest of the evening and part way into the early night, was spent in a strange sense of limbo.  The pair of your sat quietly, companionably next to each other.  Hux sat doing work and you entertaining his cat as you watched him; occasionally making yourselves a drink.  He worked hard and you had to grudgingly admire his dedication, the commitment he took to his work; even if it was to the wrong side. 

He frowned as a bleep came through and shifting from the couch he stood.  Insisting that you follow him into the bedroom and opened one of the cupboards.  He took clothing you didn’t realise he had from the very back of one of his wardrobes, a full First Order uniform; designed for a female officer and definitely in your size.

“Put it on and make yourself passable I am trusting you to behave.  If you choose to be unruly or uncooperative then there will be no warning. I will not hesitate to use your chip.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone worked out why she has always preferred Hux yet? The next couple of chapters will hint at it and 15 will answer it, but I really want to know if anyone has got it yet?


	13. Protocol One

Once you were dressed presentably, General Hux handed you an elastic tie and under his watchful gaze; you pulled your hair back from your face into what you guessed to be a regulation style. Raising your brow as he circled around you, smugly waiting for his approval; knowing full well you would pass his inspection.

His simple nod was the confirmation that you had passed his high standards, handing you a datapad and instructing you to wait whilst he changed into his own uniform.  At first you rocked on the balls of your feet; then deciding deception was needed, you humoured his re-entrance by relaxing into a perfect parade rest whilst you waited.  Ignoring the catches of the wool tunic against the newly formed scabs to half jokingly salute him.  Flustered when he stared, brows narrowing in annoyance; hissing at you.

“For this deception to work, it is necessary for you to at least present some modicum of control.”

Your cheeks warmed at his rebuke whilst your back itched.  You forced yourself to stand straighter; and ignored the growing need to scratch at your broken skin. This time pulling off a textbook salute and earning yourself instead of a reprimand; a cool nod that you took to be approval. Returning to the correct stance whilst he gathered up more items and handed you them.  Your reflection in the viewport showing you a young woman; presented as the perfect First Order officer.  The uniform cut almost as though it had been made for you; and you wondered at when it had been made and how long it been waiting in his wardrobe for you. 

You would have to ask him about it later, for now he was chivvying you out of the door; Hux led you from his quarters, and you fall into his stride with ease. Remembering his rebuke; you insisted on acting like the officer he had presented you as.  Keeping perfect pace with him and doing your best to anticipate each change in direction; your shoulders back and your chin held up high. Careful to keep your voice low and your expression neutral enough as not to arouse suspicion in any of the passing Stormtroopers.  Relieved that at this late hour, the passageways were lit far dimmer than their daytime brightness. It helped and that your disguise was working for none of the stormtroopers you encountered appeared to recognise you as the enemy. Each group stepping neatly aside to let the General pass and saluting in his passage.  Registering his presence first long before they checked your uniform; each one muttering your supposed rank as your greeting. 

The rouse held its place, all the way to his quarters; it was the uniforms and not the individual that mattered here; something you were so thankful for.  Whilst you hated having to wear your enemies’ colours; the clothing reeking of everything you weren’t, it least it offered you faceless protection.         

“We have received last minute intel on a possible Resistance attempt to rescue you, and as such Ren is outright demanding that I hand you back over to him for the night; therefore, I dare not leave you alone in my quarters.”  It was difficult not to frown at that; you could not see how keeping you with him would stop Ren from coming to fetch you himself.  There would be no hiding from him, there was nowhere on this base that he could not access, so even the General couldn’t keep you away forever. You hoped he wouldn’t have reason to leave you alone with the Commander; but a day would come when he could not keep Kylo Ren from you.  If nothing else, it stood to reason though that you would have to deal with him again, for your reconditioning. But for now, you wouldn’t give those thoughts credence; you hated to dwell on that nightmare.

“Won’t Ren, just know I’m with you?”

“Whilst you behave yourself, he will not directly challenge me for you, it was an agreed part of the conditioning. According to the current plan there is no need for you to encounter Commander Ren until your departure date.”

You nodded.  Not in agreement, but as a suggestion that you were listening to him. His assurances seemed full of holes, but you brushed it off.  Aware from past experiences, that pushing when Hux refused to answer you a question, the answer normally came with a price to yourself paid for with your emotional or physical pain.  Either way, you could not afford the consequences of another one of his outbursts.  Your body had no wish to experience anymore today; you were too tired from his earlier outburst.  At least he was keeping you away from Kylo Ren and you didn’t dare ask why Ren wanted you. It was not at all difficult to work out that one out, especially given his actions last night. 

Unlike his quarters, his office was clinically sparse.  Not at all comforting like his quarters.  It was freezing too; and you shivered as he directed you to the rooms only couch; an uncomfortably cold black leather one. You curled up into a corner of it, tucking your hands into your sleeves for warmth.  Smiling in thanks when he took his coat from his shoulders, laying it over your shivering torso.  A cold shiver ran your back as the rest of you warmed; the hairs on the back of your neck standing on end as you realised how afraid you were.  Was last night only to test how receptive you were to his body; or had the General been right in giving you the contraceptive today?

“Thank you, General.”

You burrowed into its warmth, laying onto your side to keep as little of you touching the cold leather as possible, your head on the couch arm and breathing slowly to calm your fears. General Hux unlocked the datapad you carried and after altering several security settings; he handed it back to you and set himself down to work at the huge wooden desk. Making it very clear, that although you were permitted in here with him; he was not to be disturbed.  

With nothing else to do; you flicked through its content. There was nothing of any note available to you on it; just some books and a couple of personal files.  It had been foolish to think that you wouldn’t try and access the blocked files; and you doubted Hux expected anything less.  But any attempt to gain access to the military files was met with request for DNA and a passcode, coupled with a stern look from General Hux over the top of his monitor.

You searched through the permitted files of the datapad, stopping when you came to a file full of recorded images.  It didn’t hold that many pictures, but there were a couple of a red-haired cadet that you assumed was Hux. Each one taken in the same pose, showing him growing progressively older; the only differences were his eyes.  In the younger ones, there had been a sadness, which deadened as he aged into a determined hunger. A glint of something scary in the final one for all, his chest no more puffed than the first. Within that folder, you discovered a couple of hidden files. One with a single image of a very young boy, with a woman you took to be his mother; an odd and genuine smile present.  He was a scrawny little thing, all elbows and knees; but that one made you smile to yourself.  You discovered none of him with his father; but you suspected that it wasn’t all that uncommon in a man of his standing. Perhaps he had not been close to the man; you could not imagine the General Hux you knew now, having been that close to either of his parents. 

After some time, General Hux took a break from his work.  Fetching you over a drink when he poured his from a drink cabinet hidden inside one cupboard.  Thanking him, you took the glass gratefully.  Sipping it as you continued scrolling. He sat down at your hip to take a small break from the screen, rolling his eyes as he realised what you were looking at and standing to return to his desk. 

Your found images of Hux were getting older and older, morphing slowly into a fledgling officer; and finally, one from the day he had been appointed General.  In that there was an older man next to him, one who you assumed from his dissimilar genetics could not be his father.  A young woman stood next to him, her pose with him too full of familiarity for her to be with the other man in the image.  You sat up a little straighter, your interest piqued by this image; wincing as you caught one of the marks on your back.  Taking a last sip of the drink as you caught his attention to show him the datapad.

“The woman next to you, she is too young to be your mother, is she your stepmother?” You knew, as soon as you said it you were wrong; and not just because his face clouded completely with shame. No, it for some reason hit you as soon as you had spoken, a lead weight settling as you guessed immediately who his guest had been.  His disgust at himself as evident in his voice, as his face as he spoke the hoarseness of a secret hoped to go untold.

“No Kitten. That woman is my wife.”

Your response had already been laid in wait in your body; though you didn’t realise it, until you flung the glass at him in his face. Its contents and all splashing against his cheek and leaving his uniform sullied.  His threat to use the chip forgotten by both of you; as he struggled to pin you to the couch.  His legs straddling your hips in a strained endeavour to keep you still and preventing you from striking him.

“Well you are a fucking whore aren’t you! Can’t just keep it in your pants.  Does she know your fucking Ren, that you nearly did me?!”

His voice was hurried, the usual eloquence to his wording lost in his struggles to keep you in check.  Hands binding a wrist a piece and his legs gripping tighter to prevent you from throwing him off. “It wouldn’t matter to her.  Men like me, we do not have the luxury of sentiment, we do not marry for love, we marry for power.  Her wealth was the financial backing for over a third of the First Order.” You weren’t prepared to listen to this bantha shit; it didn’t excuse his infidelity; or his need to include you in it.  Your struggled protests that it didn’t matter, falling on deaf ears as he continued to hold you, nearly desperate to finish making his excuses to you. “I feel absolutely nothing for her. It is my job is to provide her with a social standing, hers is to provide me an heir and unlike me, a legitimate one.”

He had to keep going didn’t he, to try and placate you instead of letting you go to seethe quietly in a corner.  His voice so cut, so hurt that you nearly gave up on fighting him off at his sad admission that he was just a bastard. His eyes so sorrowful that you almost suspected tears from him.  There was clear and uncut pain residing in that story; and you suspected a link to the missing images of his father.  Had he been rejected by him too; had anybody ever wanted him for himself.

“If that’s true then why was she here? Why did you give me over to Ren?”

You were not going to be that easily placated, even if it pulled on your heartstrings to see him so vulnerable. But Hux was far healthier than you and naturally beginning to win the tussle. The exertion of pushing against him was costing you far more in energy reserves, than it did him to simply use his body weight to push down onto you.  His body although wiry, still far bigger and stronger than yours; his muscles holding a deceptive robustness to them that yours had yet to regain.  His voice quieter and full of strain; but no less angry in his insistence as he kept you in place. “I did not give you over to Ren, I hid you with him from her.  You think the Ren and I are evil; you do not want to upset her.”

He was blatantly contradicting himself now in his hurry to sooth you. Your voice to emotional; but taught with disgust at him as you spat forwards more questions.  Filled with the unfairness of it all. Both angry and hurt, that he could do all he had to you; that he could be so cruel and yet still got to live a second life.  One with a sense of normalcy, an escape from his war and from you; one that offered companionship.  

“I thought she wasn’t bothered by your extramarital activities.”

Your attempts were so weak now that he hardly had to fight you; though the intention behind the vigour of your fight had not completely gone from your intermediate struggles. You were almost at the end of your reserves and perhaps would not have lasted so long this time without your jealousy.  You hated now the guilt that you now felt, at what you had done unwittingly to another person.  The deception of a civilian that you would have willingly played a part in to escape disgusted you, just as much as your hate for succumbing to him. You should not be feeling hurt that a man you barely knew had a wife; you should not feel this waisted cocktail of emotions for your enemy. 

Your fight ended as his head dipped low. Unwisely laid to rest against your forehead, your last-ditch attempts to do it an injury failing dead as you processed numbly his reply. “She wouldn’t be ordinarily, but then you’re not my whore.”

Your intended reply died on your lips as you realised you had not received the answer you had been expecting.  Replaced by a shallow whisper, as you ceased all fight. Tilting your face from him, in an attempt to hide what it contained from him. Too afraid he might realise the hope that blossomed in your heart; that he could rip it out and leave you bleeding if he protested that he still didn’t care.

“No General, I am just your prisoner.”

His voice dropped to husky mumble.  Sinking to a depth that you hadn’t heard before, as he laid himself closer over you.  Defeat letting his body sink onto yours, just his elbows holding his chest off you.  “No Kitten, you are not just my prisoner.” You swallowed hard, whether from fear or relief you were not sure. But his thumb brushed your cheek as he cupped it in one leather wrapped paw, and you heart stuttered as he pulled your face closer to his.  His voice now a choked whisper in your ear, yet somehow filled with more resolve than it had ever had before; his actions definite, dominant; but also so very gentle. “Not just my prisoner.”

Your breath sounded so loud to you now as at came thudding though your chest.  The restart of your heart like a snare, thundering in your ears and taking all sense.  Your mouth was almost too dry to ask for clarification you so desperately needed. 

“What am I then?”

“Mine.”

That one word was spoken with all finality and so resolutely, that you felt it in your bones. The weight behind it leaching onto your skin, flooding your sex with liquid fire.  The truth of it cementing yourself to him. You lowered your eyes to his chest, finding that you couldn’t bear to look him in in the eye. So afraid of what you would see, fearful to your core that you still didn’t understand what it meant to you; that it would cement your failure to your Resistance.  His chest so warm, so fragrant as you were pressed against it that it begged for you to relax into him.  The smell of his cologne, flooding your senses as you buried your nose into him and breathing deeply of him.  All in the vain hope that either you would steady yourself or finally drown. 

The knuckles at your jaw brushed softly against your cheek, tenderly his fingers plucked to clear a stray lock of hair and titling your face back up to him. Whispering, no pleading for you to look at him. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to do so though. Your lashes stayed lowered, your lips parted, as you felt each hurried and shallow breath, leave your lungs. Too frightened that the spell would be broken and that you would find signs of deception in his eyes. That you would whither beneath him and become nothing. The grip on your chin firmed, and he repeated his request as a stern command.  Spoken between an almost clenched jaw, each word punctuated with a warning to obey. 

“Look at me.”

You forgot to breath as your eyes flickered upwards to find them intently staring as they lowered towards yours. Caught as the pale blue of his eyes was almost swallowed whole by hungry blackness.  Your tongue darting out to moisten your lips, his eyes wide as it brushed innocently against the thumb that now stroked against it. 

You startled, though panic made it impossible for you to struggle.  Afraid all at once, that this was all your doing; that somehow your own pheromones had influenced him again.  He ignored any discomfort you had, continuing to dip his head towards you.  Chills running your spine as his nose brushing the side of yours.  His breath was warm as he massaged his cheek against yours, the skin chafed with the days’ stubble as he rubbed it against you.  Tilting his head to place his lips against the skin of your neck, leaving one, then two, then a series of small kisses against your skin as they worked up towards your mouth.  His lips were everything his eyes spoke of when they met yours, ravenous in his quest to devour you.  Sloppy and warm, so very juxtaposed to the man you knew. 

His hand touched at your waist, his other slid into the hair at your crown, tightening you against your initial urge to bolt.  You trembled as he broke the kiss, almost too wrought with anxiety to speak in case he punished you for it.  Brows pulling together in sorrow at his frown, something of an almost pained expression at your disquiet, making you realise he would demand answers; that you could not deceive him anymore.

“Kitten?”

It was a question you dared not answer; but knew you must.  Steeling yourself to speak, the question dying at the single word, too scared of the consequences to finish your question. “Pheromones?”   

He gave you a sad chuckle, shaking his head at you and pulling away, to sit up. Leaving your body cold; bereft of the comfort of his touch and warmth had had momentarily provided. “Are you afraid that you might influence me, or is it a warning that you will try to?”

You couldn’t answer so distressed by what you had undone. Your face paling as you shuffled back against the corner of the sofa, dropping your eyes to your lap in abeyance. Sadly watching him straighten up and pull away from you.  Realising that you had been too defensive, either, you hadn’t accidently swayed him, or he didn’t care if he did. 

You squirmed as he quietly explained that he must return to his monitor and his work.  Covering you again with his coat as he reluctantly advised you, he had to finish his work tonight.  His voice kind; but disappointed as he assured you that he hoped that he would not be too long, and to amuse yourself until then. Your body ached in unrequited desire; desire that you hadn’t the bravery to ask him to come back and take care of. Your need to relieve the near painful, throbbing between your legs not dissipating with his departure. 

The longer you watched him, the harder it was to ignore the tempo that beat beneath your skin. Subtly giving in as you unfastened the clasps and slid a hand under your trousers.  Pleased that he was too engrossed in his work to notice; your alien biology too hard to ignore once you were aroused.  You figured that so long as you kept your legs raised, your body angled just so with the greatcoat covering you and kept quiet; you could get away with this; you too could be shrewd.

You sank your torso lower into the couch, when your hand slid under the synth-cloth of your panties.  Nearly gasping aloud in disbelief, as you realised just how wet he had made you with a single kiss.  Your fingers slipping between the lips of your shorn sex whilst you held your breath in check.  Careful as you swirled them around your clit to keep from rustling your clothes, virtually biting on your wrist, as you did your best to muffle your moans. 

It seemed that the more aroused you grew, the more the Zeltron biology took over, pushing aside most of your modesty and any remaining shame at what you did.  Your fingers sliding faster and faster, in your sly attempt to bring your body some reprieve.  Muscles shaking as you grew closer, too lost to the sensations to realise that a needy whine was building, hearing it slip too loudly from your throat and freezing in furious consternation at yourself. 

A cough sounded from across the room. Making you raise up again into a semi-seated pose.  Your cheeks blazing and putting tell to, your professed lie, that you had been doing nothing.

You apologised politely for disturbing him.  His countenance reproachful for your interruption, before softening with a sly smirk, as he realised your predicament.  Eyes sliding to the side, before he stood and walked over, slow clipped steps, making you hurry to remove your hands.  Cursing yourself for ever thinking this would be a good idea and scurrying to try and rearrange your clothes, hoping that it would go unnoticed by him.  That you could continue your façade that his kiss had done nothing to you.

His face was neutral, as swiftly removed his coat from you.  Making you sit up and guard your waist in a failed attempt to hide your trousers from him. Your pants obviously in a state of undress, the evidence of your actions smeared wetly in places across your fingers.  

“Show me Kitten, touch yourself.”

You swallowed hard against the lump in your throat, there had been no malice, no attempt at shaming you; just a hunger to see you unravel for him.  It strengthened your resolve to obey him, lowering your legs and once more unfastening the closures on your trousers.  This time aware that he would be watching, frowning as he placed the greatcoat on his arm and walked back to his desk.  Sinking slowly into his chair to watch you.   

“Take them off.”

You couldn’t believe you were doing this; exposing yourself to him like this but you struggled to comply.  Paused when he looked back towards the monitor, his fingers touching it in a series of complicated taps. His inattention making you falter as your trousers reached your hips.   

“Keep going.”

He looked back at his work again after speaking, but the message was understood his is attention was divided, but you still were his main focus. 

You pondered what to do with your panties at that. Should you leave them on; or take them off to do this?  This was clearly no longer a case of just you fulfilling your own needs. You wanted to tempt him; you wanted him to want you, so the part you played was now to please him. Hesitantly you looked over at him for guidance, waiting to be told what to do. 

“All of them.”

You nodded, slowly, grateful for him taking control as you continued stripping off each layer. Exposing your body to the chill air of the room; your skin warmed only by the heat in his stare. Your skin pebbling to the cold, your nipples tightened by desire and the temperature to an almost painful peak.  Realising that for someone who had professed a need to work, was being very attentive to you.  His eyes openly wandering the stretch of your body as bravely you splayed your legs open in their judgement of you.

“Maker, your beautiful.”

You mouth parted in staggering shock at him. Did think you attractive; or was it just the bruises that decorated your body that he admires, after all he had already professed a sadistic streak.  You weren’t left to that thought for long, before you heard the unfastening of his pants and the slow sounds of slapping flesh that made you bite your lip as your cheeks coloured.  Your fingertips sliding over your hips as you kept your focus on Hux and what he was doing to himself beneath the desk.  Dipping your hand again between the juncture your thighs and pushing your legs apart to bare yourself and what you did to him. 

 

It should have felt cheap to demean yourself like this, you were almost behaving like the cheap whore that he had just denied you to be.  But in this quest for his attentions, the liquid fire that ran your veins spurned all thoughts of refusing his request. Moaning as your fingers pushed deeper inside yourself, a third slipping in on the next downwards stroke, to add to the two already stretching your walls. 

His movements had faltered when you exposed your stuffed core to him, your fingers slipping inside you.  His breathing stuttered, making you realise the odd hold you had over your gaoler.  The movements of his arms, the tiny jerking of his torso told you that he had continued; and his eyes that you had his undivided attentions. That whilst his wrist pumped his cock, his focus was purely on you.

You moans were wanton, free now to be as loud as you needed to be, your head thrown back, arching for a moment to raise your hips from the sofa. Granting him a brief clearer view of what you were doing to yourself; what he drove you to do.  Your lust fed in its entirety by thoughts of the man pleasuring himself over thoughts of you and what you could do to together. 

Your free hand stroked over a large bruise next to your clavicle, the fingers pressing hard into the mark against your skin.  The pain delectable both in its cause and architect, as you steeped in it.  The hand dipping lower and tweaking your nipple, pinching it and rolling the aching bud between your hurried digits.  Your eyes searching for a reaction from him, rewarded by a sharpened intake of breath, the slow swallow he performed for you as his movements stilled. Making you wonder how he’d hurt you given the chance, realising that he was as lost to lust as you were.  

You knew you were wet, your juices slipping between the cracks of your ass and pooling onto the leather of his sofa. Your ass sticky with them as you blushed again, wondering if it had ever been so defiled before, a brief sober moment making you suddenly unsure of your wanton behaviour.

“Come here.”

You were vulnerable and naked, but you obeyed.  Creeping painstakingly slowly towards him and doing your best not to appear shy or to look at the space between his thighs. Letting him hold your naked waist, as he cleared a space on desk and lifted you up and onto it.  Seating himself methodically back into his chair and showing you in turn the effect you had on him. 

He ran a finger the length of his cock, and you gulped at seeing him so openly displayed to you. He instructed you to continue lifting your leg and bringing your foot to rest on his knee, opening yourself to him once more and leaving you unbalanced, so that you had to lean unsteadily back onto one elbow. Your other hand languidly moving towards your sex, pulling moisture from inside you to anoint it against the pulsing bead.  Your fingers tapping over it and rubbing fresh shudders into your body as you teased it. It was the sight of him stroking his cock that was going to be your undoing.  The leather so dark, against the pink of his swollen cock, the tip almost purple with engorged blood. His uncontrolled breathing making you hurry to bite back a request to touch him, to taste his flesh there.  Your body shaking and muscles once again locking with your body’s exertions. Your breathing tattered in your lungs in briefly made attempts to draw air against the wave that was coming. 

You were ordered gruffly to look at him. Your eyes locking with his as he stilled his movements and stood over you, to grasp your face in his hands.  His cock twitching heavily against your thigh as unbidden you continued, too close to consider anything but finishing.

“Who do you belong to?”

You frowned; but did not still your fingers. His question pushed through clenched jaws, his face an expression of longing, edged with a wary hunger that threatened to swallow you whole and spit out your bones.  Yet you gave into it as your cunt clenched for him, your reply, a last-minute hurried reply, as your body broke for him. Cementing your words to you, filling every part of you with a certainty that had perhaps already been there.

“You, Sir.”

You keened, unable to look away, nor close your eyes from him.  Held captive by his command, as his jaw slackened in awe at you.  Lowering your slowly to lay back over the desk, as he rushed to take his prick in hand once more.  Watching through lowered and exhausted lashes, as he pumped himself; everything but his expression and his cock still fronting his position to you as General. His trousers draped around his hip; his hand placed next to your hip for support.  Grinding his front teeth together in a hiss, as he emptied himself onto your thigh, pearled ropes of scalding seamen branding your skin. 

It dripped down your leg as he panted, lowering himself into his chair and beginning to move to tuck his slowly softening cock away. Pausing as he realised drops of his fluids were still on his fingers.  He stood to find something to clean himself; heading to rinse the evidence of his arousal from his hands until silently you stopped him.  Ignoring his earlier warnings not to touch him and pulling at his wrist.  Raising those fingers up to your lips and your tongue lathing between them to gather the taste of him.  He tasted bitter and salty on your tongue, something that perhaps others would distain; but that you revelled in.  The taste more dominating than that of the supple leather of his gloves. 

He had allowed you to see him so exposed in his longing for you and whilst you knew that he wouldn’t surrender his entirety to you; the punishment you expected for touching him, never came.  He tucked himself away, pulling your mouth to his for a last harried kiss, his tongue slipping between you and of all things running soft circles on your tongue. Leaving just his hand at your crown and a single thread of saliva to connect you, as he broke the kiss and swiped his fingers up from your thighs. 

His fingers pushed into your mouth, the last offering that of his cum.  Scooped up from your leg as you’d kissed.  You took it willingly, afraid of perishing without every little gift of himself he bestowed on you and swallowed.      

His voice was once more his own as he ordered you to stand.  Opening his coat you and pushing your arms into it, the heavy wool, too large for you; but comforting all the same as you wrapped it closed around you. 

The silky lining felt tacky against the sweat of your skin and the stickiness of the residue cum on your thigh and the slickness between your legs made it cling to you in places.  But sated and tired, you were grateful to be led back to the couch, obeying the order to lay down, as he fussed; folding your clothing neatly to use as a pillow.  Lulling words chanted in your ears as he soothed you to sleep, your lids closing in contentment at the intimacy of it all.

You found yourself awoke briefly, but often during the night, each time to see him still working.  Sometimes he wouldn’t notice you, his fingers clacking over the screen as he scowled at whatever entry it presented.  Others he would pause in his work, uttering gentle directions for you to return to sleep, his expression exhausted as he strove to complete the work at hand.

It was just before sunrise when you woke again.  The greying light flittering through a roof light in his office and the blinds of his window closed against the gathering dawn.  He was laid over his desk asleep, head on his arms and his normally perfect hair ruffled by sleep. 

Like this he was so different, he looked so young still when asleep and peaceful, the ruffling of his unkempt hair adding to his charms.  He didn’t stir when you walked silently over, fingers reaching for his monitor, his name spoken in a quick greeting as he stirred, his hand reaching too late to stop you switching off his workstation.

“Sir, you need rest, to sleep in an actual bed.”

He nodded and smoothed back his hair, ordering you to dress and to follow him.  You scrambled quickly to your Generals command; covering the flesh that had taunted him, last night. 

He was ready before you, having only needed to straighten out his hair and clothing and pulled on the proffered greatcoat. The scent of your cum clinging to it in places, now mingled with his intoxicating cologne. Bringing a warm smirk to your lips, as you realised that he was intending to walk through the bases’ corridors in it. 

Finished you turned to him for inspection, unable to complete the final checks without a mirror. Patiently standing as he pulled against small irregularities in your uniform, brushing your hair straight for you, his leather fingers combing through it to pull it tidily into a bun.  Happy that your clothing and hair were up to his strict standards, you followed as he ordered you to follow as he strode to the door. 

His hand hovered over the control switch before making a lastminute grab for you.  His lips soft as they touched your own in a charming; but oddly timed last minute and unusual playful bid to make you blush. Pulling himself together, before activating the opening mechanism.   

 


	14. Sleeper Agent

You strode from the Generals office and effortlessly kept in pace with him, positioned to the correct position as was befitting the rank shown on your sleeve. Prudently listening shyly in on the thoughts of those who you passed by. 

It was thankfully un-remarked by the first few personnel that you passed, what you were doing accompanying General Hux from his office at this ungodly hour in the morning.  None of the Officers and Troopers you passed on their way to morning mess, had noticed the marks decorating your neck. Or let their eyes linger for noticeably long on the hastily tidied back hair.  Meaning that whatever had gone on between you both was personal, private between just the two of you.  Had they noticed anything amiss though, you doubted that General Hux would have dignified their curiosity with an answer.  Most insisted on sensibly dropping their gazes to the floor.  Although as their numbers grew, a scarce few dared to give you curious; or in a rare couple of cases as the journey progressed; started to develop into outright filthy looks over their shoulders as they had passed General Hux. 

Perhaps it was your conscience; but it was getting increasingly more difficult to keep on ignoring the smirks.  For all you prided yourself that it wasn’t impossible yet, you were close to losing your temper at more than one. Your pride and this current charade replacing all fear and common sense as the last one passed. This one had not verbally commented on your appearance; but it was the disgusting and degrading thoughts of you that you plucked from the mind of one particularly awful Stormtrooper that was the final straw.  You passed by him first and had resolved to ignore him; before rounding back to outwardly challenging the man on his thoughts on your ass and how it could better serve himself let alone his General.  Goading him into trying to do what he had last thought about, to you; to voice his opinion of you being your General’s slut. 

The stormtrooper knew that his thoughts had been particularly vile, and of an overtly sexual nature.  But when he tried to run away from you, you had had called at him to stop.  Threatening to have him court marshalled, if he didn’t supply his serial number to you.  Your brain happy now that the crude thoughts he had initially entertained himself with were sliding heavily towards a nervous anticipation, as he registered your uniform and slowly approaching companion. The lastminute panicked scream to himself making it clear that it was Hux, who made the difference, his frame at your back in a show of solidarity; one that the soldier almost shit himself over as General Hux asked for clarification from you.

“Is there a problem officer?”

“Not as yet Sir, but if he keeps up what he’s thinking there will be.”

It gave you a sense of pride, that he would protect you like this; yet leave you to fight your own battles. If it had ever unnerved you to have to square up to the Stormtrooper, then the support of a commanding officer had chased that away.  Gone was any fear you may have had; and it followed though in the sharp crack of your voice. Hux making sure to stand alongside you, and you deduced that he had worked out what the trooper had been thinking. 

You had kept your reply curt and correct, addressing your General as would be protocol and not the trooper.  Figuring, it gave the plain clothed Stormtrooper, a chance to somehow readdress his mistake.  One that might, offer you both a chance at avoiding a more heated confrontation.  The helmeted head looked over to the General for help, faltering as he took in the Generals reaction to him.  Deciding that Hux wasn’t about to excuse his actions, he made a hasty and garbled half-hearted apology, one that you at least could sense wasn’t really aimed at you, more an attempt, to really appease your superior. Stupidly trying to explain himself as though it was his actions that had earned him the reprimand; rather than the thoughts that he still failed to curb.

“General Sir, I thought she wasn’t.”

“You thought, she wasn’t what, exactly Trooper?”

Hux’s voice held a sharp edge to it as he quickly cut the man off; and it pleased you.  It suggested now clearly to the Stormtrooper, that he would back you up should you choose to punish him.  You stood straighter, further bolstered by his protection of you.

The Stormtrooper seemed to have considered something you didn’t quite catch for a moment, but wished you had. You’d been too busy, crowing over Hux backing you up to work out where his thoughts of you had gone; but he seemed indecisive and unable to comprehend what was going on.  Clutching at straws, he conceded to what he hoped had been his Generals’ wishes; unsure as he spoke, if he was really lying, or if he had somehow become confused.

“No one Sir, I must have been mistaken”

“You must have been Trooper; now move along.”

A little part of you was cross that the man wasn’t going to get his comeuppance.  But General Hux had been up all night, working and there were priorities to see to.  You supposed he needed to get home and get changed; he was such a fastidious man, that he would hate still being in last nights’ clothing.  It was best to let the stormtrooper go; after all, how on earth could you have proven his thoughts about you to the General. 

Hux had already decided to start walking and so you quickly followed him. Your strides long and swift; almost running in your haste to catch up with him.  A sense of relief hitting you as you did, seemingly much happier to be close to him. From you position at his side, best able to better cope with the thoughts of those whom you passed. 

You were aware that whilst it was a curse to have such Force-powers, the for the General you would utilize them.  Even going as far as to have to train with Kylo Ren if it meant honing them. You shuddered as the image of him flashed through your memory banks, almost stumbling at the cold sense of dread, that came over you, at the mere thought of that man’s name. Unable to place the reasoning for your fear, but that the emotion was so strong, that you hankered after a memory; one you couldn’t quite recall.  It was all like a dead end, virtually a wall, a memory you knew you should place but couldn’t; something that seemed to be triggered beyond what had been his treatment of you on this base.

A touch to your shoulder, made you realise you had stopped; and you looked up to find Hux waiting.  His tired face, making you feel so guilty for holding him up.  There was such a concern for you held in his beautiful eyes, that you pushed away your thoughts; apologising.  The man was exhausted; and your behaviour was keeping him from his rest.  General Hux had spent the whole night working whilst he let you sleep; and it was him who deserved your thoughts now. 

Once at his quarters you had were groggily instructed to strip and get into bed with him.  General Hux lifting the covers for you to join him, whilst he grabbed a couple of hours of rest. His back to you as his breathing deepened into a genuine sleep; and though your ankle was not chained this time, you too slept.  

You awoke late in the morning, to of all things your hair being stroked, whilst Hux softly encouraged you to wake.  You blinked your memories like your current thoughts, disoriented at being woken; but guilty at having slept longer than him. Then followed quickly by a flash of fear; one that you could not quite place. You knew that you should have woken before him, or at least when the alarm had gone off, after all you had managed some sleep last night, even if it had been on his couch; but that was no reason for this. You frowned, trying to recall what possible reason, the inability to do so unsettling you, far more than anything else.

Judging from his naked torso, he had just showered. He was freshly shaved too, his hair neatly combed; and a pure white towel wrapped around his waist.  You gave a half smile at that, scenting the clean smell of his soap, mixed in with a splash of his cologne, your fingers stroking the damp ends of his hair.  Stopped when he caught your wrist, bringing your palm to his mouth and placing a kiss against it.  Murmuring, almost absent mindedly, to himself.  

“It worked, hasn’t it?”  You stared blankly at him, not entirely sure what he meant by his comment.  You could recall that Kylo Ren had been inside your head and you could, albeit vaguely, remember some indistinctive memories, of having agreed with him to alter something.  But there was not enough there yet to recall what exactly you had agreed to do and so you could not deduce what the redhead meant.  Then again, his voice had been so gentle, so full of awe, that you didn’t give it much thought; preferring instead to gaze into softly lidded eyes, thick ginger lashes falling heavily against his pink cheekbones.  His spare hand touching at your cheek; and the look of adoration in there so intense, that it made your cheeks heat; the flush spreading as far as to your ears. “You really are, my soldier.”

It was such an odd thing to hear him so amazed by anything; and there was a level of uncertainty in his voice with his odd sense of wonderment that you were here in his bed. His question had you confused; and your brow knit together in thought; and had you been stronger, you might have attempted to dip into his mind; if only to find out how to reassure him.  Why would you be here, willingly in his bed if you weren’t completely his, let alone being his soldier. 

“Of course I am Sir.  Why wouldn’t I be?”

His lashes fluttered almost seductively, his eyes gazing so intently that you dropped your gaze, to his mouth.  Fascinated with tracing the outline of his cupid’s bow, as it pulled to the side in a pleased but lopsided grin.  Watching baitedly, as he moved closer and lowered your hand from his mouth.  Totally hypnotised by the way his lips gently parted as they reached for you and moulded against your own.  His mouth pressing firmer and more fervent kisses into your own, his tongue all but demanding an entrance.  You dutifully opened you mouth for him.  Your own tongue timid, as it moved against his; a tiny huff of desperation slipping past and into his waiting mouth.  It incited an aggressive growl from him; and it was such an abnormal, such unrestrained noise from him that it caused your eyes snap instinctively open wide in shock at him. Your body’s response the opposite, its response was to melt beneath him, whilst he rolled you over onto your back.  Pressing you firmly and decisively into his bed under his lithe frame.  Forcing more enthusiastic noises from your throat, your legs opening for him to nestle between.

A bleep sounded, followed by an alarm from the holopad next to you.  Hux breaking off your heated embrace and sitting up above you. Falling back onto his heels, to open what you guessed was a priority data message.  A grimace, before he donned a guilty look of concentration; apologising as he got with his eyes still glued to the screen. 

He was still wrapped in his towel; and as temping as it was to unfasten it and encourage him to leave off work for a while; you didn’t dare.  Not sure enough that he would take it as good natured, as you would mean it and something else you couldn’t name holding you back as he poured over the screen.  Occasionally tapping frustratedly at the screen.  Whatever it was, he didn’t look happy.  Changing as he worked on it into a fresh uniform. 

He did manage to share a small breakfast with you, and you were doing your best to make him linger over his cup of tea. Giving into the mounting curiosity as more memories surfaced from the night before; all of them confusing and mixed together with so many blanks.  He looked over the rim of his holopad at you huffing; did he ever stop working?  You tried to supply yourself with a memory of him taking time off, but couldn’t, drawing more blanks at every turn. Long memories mixed in with large absences of time; all that was coming up was that you had been training for something, a mission.  You wondered if perhaps when you had completed the mission for him, you could encourage him to take a small brake with you. 

“The Stormtrooper from last night, who did he think I was?”

“You wouldn’t like it, if I told you.”

You couldn’t shake off the gut feeling that something important was being hidden from you.  The thoughts that Stormtrooper had about you, now you could remember them, had been downright disgusting.  Tinged heavily with not just a personal distaste for you; but something else; as though somehow Hux fucking you was putting you in your place. 

“I think I would like to know, all the same General, Sir.”

You grimaced now at his stern refusal; your curiosity making you press the matter and beginning to lose your patience at him, repeating your previous request for him to tell you what was going on.  This time with an added edge of annoyance to your voice, General Hux placing the pad on to the table and giving in to your question.

“Can you remember being fetched in as a prisoner?”

You nodded thoughtfully, vague memories of being held and interrogated by General Hux.  Granted it was all a still little foggy, but somethings were getting clearer.  You remembered the time spent gathering information from the Resistance; but you could not remember how you had been sent there.  You knew that having your mind altered would hold residue hiccups; but the gaps were so vast that you could remember precious little of what the mission had been before that.

“He was about when we recovered you. Ren and I fetched you in under the pretence of being taken our prisoner.  I am afraid we could not risk sending out a memo that you did in fact work for us for fear that it would distract from the realism of your mission; something you had agreed to when you carried the plans.”

The General did not lie, that much you could tell; but there was something about his answer that sat very uneasily with you.  Suddenly sickened, you pushed the remains of your fruit and yogurt around your plate, picking at a lone berry to chew slowly on.  Something about everything wasn’t right; and you couldn’t press Hux for more answers, not if you wanted to him to trust you.  Whilst it felt awfully distrustful of him to ask for more details; nothing was adding up.  He obviously trusted you a great deal to be having you around his personal quarters with him; and to show suspicions of him would question that.  Then you thought on how he had woken you; nobody who looked at you as he did, who kissed you like he did could be hiding his feelings from you.  Whatever you were confused about, it most certainly was not his familiarity with your body; that alone felt comfortably correct.  

“What is the matter; are you unwell?”

He was watching your actions too intently for you to dwell on your worries and when you shook your head, he raised an eyebrow in a gentle suggestion that he did not believe you.  Making you feel even more worried to have unsettled him.  You mumbled out an apology, a single sorry which he asked you to elaborate on, promising not to get cross at you.  His gentleness just weighing heavier on your guilty conscience.

“I’m sorry Sir, I really am. I just guess, my memories are still, a little fuzzy.”

He gave you a reproachful, but kindly meant stare.  Reassuring you, when your confidence began to falter with common sense and practicalities. “If this is the case, then I suggest you take time to rest until your mission. If this continues, then I shall request for Ren to come and have a look at you.”

You sighed to yourself, shaking your head at his offer; the earlier uncomfortable feelings about Ren resurfacing.  You supposed that whilst it was only natural to fear the man from the elusive memories of overheard gossip that flittered through to you now; your dislike was not from these memories. Something you could not recall, gripped you with a personal fear of him; reminding you that whilst he could be very unpleasant, you had nothing to recall as to why. 

“I’ve acquired some new bath oils, and soaps.  Why don’t you give them a go?” Hux had picked up his holopad after downing the rest of his drink. Reminding you to take the day to recuperate and use this time to rest, for there would be precious little time for you to do so soon.

With a deep breath, you nodded; reasoning that he was correct as you began clearing away his cup for him.  He was right, it was silly to stress and to give the encounter with the stormtrooper much thought. The more people that believed that you, had been brought in as a Resistance soldier; the quicker; and the less convoluted the tale that would get back to their leaders. 

General Hux had ran you a bath before he left, taking the time to add a copious amount of expensive smelling oils and soaps to the running water.  He also dug out an old holopad for you to read, bringing up a selection of old novels and technical manuals that he thought you would enjoy.  Kissing your head as he wished you goodbye and looking back almost wistfully as he headed out of the door to begin his official watch.

You soaked back in the water, barely able to concentrate on any reading.  Your head trying to sort through the muddled pile of your jumbled memories; supposing that it was perhaps only natural, that there should be some residue memory loss. 

You had a hazy memory of Ren speaking to you in a dream-like state, warning you not to get upset that you wouldn’t remember everything. Someone repeatedly warning you, that it was a possibility that you would still get confused and still think you owed the Resistance your total loyalty. 

You snarled at that and slapped at the water decidedly.  You owed that bunch of meddling idiots nothing; not after what they had done to your sisters.  They should never have split you all up and forced you to change your appearance. Once you had completed this mission, you would be leaving them, your only goal would be to find Keeva; and if Adrianna would come too, then together you would all build a new life elsewhere; away from this war.  

You pulled your legs up and rested your chin on top of your knees.  This growing pain was horrendous, it felt like you were processing all of this for the first time. Just like you were a child again and having to feel the helpless hurt of the separation again. They had already kept you apart, blocked parts of your memories, you couldn’t even remember how you had been separated, at what point you had lost the other two. Was it like this the first time you had your memory wiped, before you had agreed to go under cover; or had you carried this pain with you right until your last Resistance wipe? 

Melancholily, you touched at your face.  Your fingers running the line of your features as you wondered also, just how much your appearance had been altered.  Sighing you picked back up the datapad; but not going not over the books that Hux had left open for you. Instead trying to access the image files, finding that all but one was blocked to you.  Its content a single blurred image of you asleep in his bed; your hair too messy to decide when it was taken.  Shrugging aside the weirdness as just another memory discrepancy, you put the datapad aside again. You didn’t have the concentration, right now to think it over; or the strength; laying there until your skin pruned and you shivered in the water. 

Eventually you had decided that it was time to get out of the bath and you stood up; accidently knocking the datapad into the water.  You lifted it out, shouting profanities and chastisements, to yourself as the screen darkened and the data chip automatically slipped out.  Whilst it must have been a very old model for it to take on water damage, you didn’t think Hux would be pleased that you had broken it.  You hurried to the bedroom, unable to work out whereabouts on the holopad, the data chip had slipped out of to replace it; you placed the chip on the bedside cabinet next to you.  Putting the datapad next to it and hoping that it would dry off and work again. You could perhaps work it out later on if needed; if not at least Hux would have the chip back and know that you had not tried to do anything nefarious with it; you would just have to apologise later. 

You dressed, deciding it might be nice to go outside for a walk; but when you touched your hand to the lock, but it refused to open.  Deciding that it must be an oversight or a fault with the security system, you pouted, but scooped up the now restless kitten.  Carrying her into the bedroom and playing with her for an hour or two, before you both were tired out and she fell asleep on you. Yourself joining her, with sleepy musings on how you had gotten this tired today. 

It was evening when you woke, meaning that you had clearly slept far longer than you had intended. Smirking pleasantly as Hux tiptoed around the room in an effort to avoid waking you.  It was kind of him to let you sleep again, but you wished he had woken you sooner.  He was too generous with you.  You had watched him for a while, sleepily enjoying spying on him, slowly blinking as your heart measured how happy you were that he wanted you.

“I’m not asleep.” He had picked up the broken datapad and now looked down at your semi-prone posture, from the corner of his eye.  His lips twitching in that half-amused smile that he thought was dignified; whilst his eyes hid nothing of his enthusiasm on seeing you.

“I had guessed. There is a chip in your anklet, remember?”

You gestured towards the pad, apologising profusely for its current inactive state.  He turned it over in his hands. Checking it, before taking it away and depositing it in the rubbish cute in the bathroom.  Assuring you not to worry about your clumsiness and that it had been a very old one anyway.  You pushed yourself, to the side of the bed, pulling aside the covers, the anklet had almost forgotten that you had that on dully glittering against your skin. Recalling that it would monitor your health for Hux whilst still here; but also that he had told you that it would do something else you could not remember. Then quickly remembering to hand over the data chip.

 “Thank you, however it is an old model, there can be nothing of importance on it, nothing I need.  Are you at all hungry?” .  His question could have been meant for you, or the small cat, now stroking it’s self against Hux. Either way, it was both of you, who followed him into the small kitchen.  He placed food and water down for the cat, before asking you what you wanted to eat. The thought never occurring to you, to question why then, if it had been old model, there had been a picture of you on it. Instead feeling guilty that he had worked all day and that it should have been you that had thought to have food waiting for him instead. 

You offered to sort something out for him, but he declined graciously.  Pushing you back to sit on one of the couches. “You need to rest.  Like I have told you, once the Resistance have you back, it won’t be so easy to find peace.”

You really felt guilty, but he was so insistent that you gave in trying to argue.  Your offer to light the fire in the grate, however, was pleasantly accepted; and he both ordered and then cleared up for you.  Sharing a drink with you afterwards as you stretched out on the couch.  It was nice and cosy sat with him, and it would seem the cat.  The perks of the space you weren’t bothered about, more that there was the privacy of it all; and in tonight’s case the welcome firelight. 

He had dimmed the lights and allowed you to snuggle up to him.  Every now and again you kept stealing quick glances over at him; and wondered how you could have attracted him.  General Hux, really was so handsome, so clean cut; well-groomed, and elegantly poised; but as attractive as it was, everything in you wanted to mess that up. To have his clothing dishevelled, and his hair an absolute mess; and how you would go about doing such a thing.  Your fantasies lingering on the curve of his cupids bow; his full, plush lips all the more appealing as you, imagined what he could do with them. 

That though process stopped you lurchingly, in your tracts; your memories really were messed up if you could fantasise, but not remember having been more physical with him than this now.  You were obviously living with him and he kissed you like it was more than likely that you had been intimate with him. But other than an obscure memory of falling asleep sated last night, you couldn’t remember ever of having sex with the man.  It made you tensely uncomfortable; how the hell was it that he could look at you that way, but that you couldn’t remember why he chose to.

“Kitten?” You looked up at him, the wet of your eyes so unexpected, it was almost foreign to you.  He wiped away your tears, his face as full of worry as his voice as he looked over you. “What’s wrong?”

You took a deep shuddering breath. Shouldering your embarrassment at having forgotten him, against your need to know what you both were.

“I don’t remember.”  You sounded so lost; so forlorn, that he pulled you onto his lap.  His work discarded in his concern for you.  You picked at a speck on your arm, whilst he spoke, needing something physical to centre yourself on; your fingers brushed aside when they threatened to sink into your arm.

“Ren thought that this would be a difficult rewrite.  I am sorry, I had hoped it would have gone better for you; this time at least.”

This time?! So had there been other reconditioning sessions before this one? It would certainly help to explain, why there was such a large void of memories; but not how you could have forgotten them all.  Still Hux tried to calm you. Stroking your arm, as he went on, reminding you of facts you may have forgotten, simple mundane useless facts that you were not sure that you really cared about right now.  You’d be forgetting them soon, when you went back to the Resistance; so who cared that rank you held was that of a colonel; your placement only second to his, where you had completed your training, or what you had done for the First Order before this.  You could remember agreeing to the reconditioning and that at the time it was the only way to get your sister back and whilst that was the main thing; it could wait.  You were not interested in that right now and so you interrupted him, unfairly cross at him and frustrated that he hadn’t understood you.

“No General! This. Us. Me. Being here, in your rooms, do I normally live here?” He shut up and blinked in shock, his face full of mixed questions. Ones that you decided would have to wait for you, because if you stopped nowt then you would lose your bottle. “What exactly are we to each other, are we; have we been intimate? I don’t remember anything of us.”

You trailed off again; dipping your chin and once more picking at your skin until he took your hands in his.  You had almost made yourself bleed and it was sore, the skin reddened and broken.  He sighed and pulled your hand to him, stooping to kiss it better where you had worried at it.

“You stay here because it is the safest place for me to keep you and I suppose, that you could say that you were practically living here before anyway.  We, as anything are undecided; forgive me, I should have waited for your mind to settle, and not further confused you. I should have asked you, what you wanted first before I pushed you.”

He now looked regretful and you sighed; nodded as he pulled your chin up towards him.  Your lips pursed in thought. If you remembered correctly from a lecture you had attended years ago, simple facts could be changed to alter memories.  But emotions happened on a chemical level and so were not as easy to manipulate.  Therefore; it was fairly safe to believe him and your gut feeling that you had wanted this before. 

He cleared his throat and you raised your eyes, aware he had been waiting, for you to finish.  You started to apologise to him.  Only to have his finger placed against your lip, to silence you.  Your stomach churning, suddenly worried that he was politely refusing you, before pushing it aside.  You were being stupid, anyone who did not want someone, didn’t  then kiss them like he had you this morning; no matter what this was he had not lied about wanting you. 

 “Is this what you are asking me for now Kitten? For me to be intimate with you?”

 


	15. DEFCON-1

A lesser man than General Hux would have taken advantage of your confusion. Pushing got what he wanted from you; not waiting to hear what you wanted from him.  They would have pushed you into to an action or behaviour that you later may have regretted.  But as it presently stood; Hux had yet to even press you for an answer.  Let alone to coerce you into letting him bed you, leaving you time and endless amounts of patience to think over what you wanted.  Hux allowing you to take as much, or as little physical comfort from him as you needed; providing of course that it was done in private.  You understood the need for that, accepting it willingly and taking these small touches at least from him without hesitation or confusion.

But it wasn’t enough; it wasn’t what you needed for all Hux was patient in his endeavours to reassure you, that it was okay. You knew that your confusion was not normal; and although you believed that once, yes you truly had been lovers, there was still something else about it that was wrong. It made your hesitance into more than just indecisiveness; it was borne of a total uncertainty of the truth of your past.  Had there never been more than the blanks that Hux would fill you in on when you told him you could not remember; or had there been other lives lived? 

So far, he had left you untouched for days to find your answer to his question.  Your body certain of what would be its reply if asked; your head less so.  Despite that you had been assured of many times, mainly at night when he slid beneath the sheets with you, that this uncertainty was perfectly okay; you could not bring yourself to believe it.  His hands gentle and yet so firm as he gripped you, the dark swallowing your hesitation.  Almost permitting you to speak some thoughts unfretted and unhindered by the nervousness that daylight re-awoke with it.

Within your heart of hearts, you knew lay the surety that you knew that it wasn’t okay not to remember. Your thoughts were becoming so jangled that even your feelings were uncertain.  To enable you to operate at full capacity, you needed to know which set of memories were yours and which were the set they had implanted.  What where you; the loyal First Order agent, who had agreed to go undercover in Resistance territory, or the tortured Resistance member who had turned traitor for your own selfish goals.  Whichever one it was, it seemed the process hadn’t completely worked the way your intelligence told you it should have; and you were petrified at what that meant to your future.  Would you be dispatched for your mission; or would they terminate you? Either way, you were of no use to either side if you didn’t sort your head out. You needed the answers you dared not to ask for.  

It was because of that fear, that you could not quite place why you didn’t dare to be completely honest with General Hux. As much as you hated lying to the man that your heart told you that you should be devoted to, practicalities told you to be deceptive.  You knew that he was too practical for sentiment to cloud your future, if he doubted an asset; no matter how besotted he was with it, then he would terminate it. It meant that your dedication to Hux, was thankfully the one thing that you didn’t dare doubt; and that made it the one thing that kept you sane. That loyalty and the incessant drive to find Keeva.

Certainly, the way he touched you suggested that he knew your body; but it was when you were out and about the main base that was the main problem. It seemed that when you were devoid of the familiarity and comfort of his quarters; that was when you most needed his reassurance.  You wanted to have his arm around you when you escorted him to debriefing sessions, but you instead had to maintain a cool and distant professional persona.  Because for General Hux, even the hint of suspicion from his officers of him being in a compromising situation with you, would have been unfitting; and not just because he was married.  It would hardly have been appropriate for any commanding officer, to be seen being affectionate with a subordinate; especially you. The one to whom the whole base had to believe was resistance scum. 

Today though you suspected that he knew you were struggling and so that was why he had spent much of the day working from his personal quarters.  From the frequent sideward glances, he shot you when he thought you were not looking, he was worried about you.  He had hovered too close to you all morning, taking the time for regular brakes with you, ensuring you didn’t skip your meals and that you drank plenty.  Sending you off for another relaxing bath late-morning; happily seating you in one for hours, constantly checking in on you and fetching you a spiced tea and biscuits. 

You thanked him for each snack; doing your best to decline the food, but thankful for the tea.  You it drank it all absent mindedly, finally getting out of the bath to accept the huge towel that the redhead held open for you once you were done.  Trying to smile as tucked it under your arms and set up a holovid on the display in his bedroom. Pulling you into an undershirt of his, before leaving you with the kitten to snuggle up and watch it.  Later on climbing onto the bed with you and insisting that as he had cooked them himself, you try one of the biscuits. 

You smiled genuinely at that kindness; nibbling reluctantly on the next biscuit that he held out to you. It wasn’t that you objected to him caring; just that you wished he’d give you some independence.  It was fast becoming cloistering as General Hux refused to let you go; declining your pout that you could feed yourself; and still insisting on hand feeding you the snack from his own hands. Otherwise silent as he sat with you cuddled against his side.  Scowling at the holovid that he had chosen for you; his precious datapad suggesting what he thought about frivolities such as this one. 

To be fair, it wasn’t really a story that you were all that keen on, but it was so nice of him to dig it out for you, that it seemed mean to have told him so. Instead you pretended to watch it, your thoughts elsewhere as you nibbled at the occasional bit of food sipping at yet again more tea. Gratefully taking from this overbearing caretaking, that at least you had his company and his time.

“A date has been selected to send you back.” You froze at that sudden and unwanted piece of news and looked over to him.  The biscuit, you had taken in hand in an attempt to avoid him feeding you, dropping to your lap in dismay. “Our intelligence has informed us that the Resistance will try, and brake into a prisoner transport convoy being moved five days from now.”

It was done then. The sentencing causing your stomach to follow the biscuit, an iron weight plummeting suddenly into your belly.  That you were leaving him was both sad and nerve-racking.  What if you messed it all up, what if something went wrong and they failed to take you? What if they guessed you were not loyal to them?  So much was at stake if you failed that you didn’t know how to process your thoughts; how to stop the rising bubble of panic.

“The Resistance, will they not just guess it’s a ruse?”  He looked inquisitively at your question and you, his brow catching the glow from the screens, furrowing as he tilted your head to study you for any clues. Boosted by his earlier tolerance of your worries, you gave into the constant need for his reassurance and allowed him a chaste kiss.  Your heart thundering traitorously as he stroked your arm reassuringly, pulling you closer to where you shuffled to nestle tighter against him.  You would miss this when you were gone, the closeness, his incredible smell; the security you felt in his arms; but you had to go. 

This was what convinced you the most that the set of memories that made you loyal to him, had to be true.  There was no way this could feel wrong; not when he lowered himself to this; he was too cold to so genuinely coddle the enemy.  You bit down on the corner of your lip, steeling yourself again against the guilt; why was it still so hard to push aside the last few doubts? Why did they make you so crippling self-doubting, of your given orders?  

“We will ensure that your rescue is completely authentic.  It is too perfect an opportunity to return you to them to make an error.”  You were not as certain as he sounded.  Your memories were so scrambled that you didn’t know you were supposed to know which side you were really on.  How would you know who you really were without the complete truth?

“And my reconditioning General?”

General Hux still seemed to think your worries inconsequential, even with your hints that something was wrong.  Unaware of the full facts of the matter, he brushed aside your concerns as easily as his fingers stroked at your hair whilst he spoke. His misunderstanding almost absentminded in its genuineness.  “What of it?”

“Will they not guess, that I am not really Resistance?”

He kissed the top of your head, not letting you up when you tensed your muscles to stand and tightening his own to hold on to you.  It was all too nice; he’d been so nice to you and somehow it made your distrust all the more unsettling; there was no way someone who looked after you this well, didn’t care that you were going. Something was wrong; why wasn’t he sad to see you go; why couldn’t you just trust him?

“Not at all. We have spent months reinforcing a perceived back story for you.  The others in the same dispatch unit have all been wiped out; and so the information transferred to you is the only known copy in existence. They are desperate to see you returned to them and as such, this will have clouded their judgement of you. You will behave just as we need you to, they will gladly take you back into their folds.  Once inside you may search for your missing sister; and any send us any further information that we may request from you.”

It was a variation of same answer he gave each time you doubted the plan.  General Hux had told you they had wrongly intercepted you halfway through your mission.  That they had attempted to get the information from you; but because of failsafe’s set-in place by your dispatcher; he could not risk retrieving it.  The carried information had been set up, so that it could only be decoded by the intended recipient; which in your case was the missing jedi, Luke Skywalker.  There had been rumours that he had returned from his exile; and there were also too many rumours of a New Jedi Order rising. The supreme leader had set you orders, that you were to nip it in the bud.  To find those intending to join it, and either add them to his ranks, or kill them; he would not take risks, however with that information still unobtainable, they were faced only with the option of sending you back. They needed the list; and you needed Keeva back.   

“Yes Sir, I understand.  Duty before family and all that.” Your clipped voice echoed his in pattern; and had you listened better, in accentuation too.  It did not thankfully show any hint of the deception you played him, duty be damned, you would get Keeva back first; you would have to disappoint him.

Had he realised you had any hint of rebellion or deviation from his plans, he failed to show it. Pleased with your answer and kissing the crown of your head again.  Speaking distractedly as he explained further. “Good, we have already placed our own agents within the Resistance. You will for your own safety be kept unaware of them.  However, he will pass on the information you acquire to us; and he will also monitor your progress, to keep us aware of any changes. Any signs of nonconformity from you and they shall act accordingly.”

Having a spy just for you, seemed an odd move for a plan that hinged on their certainty that their reconditioning of you had been completely successful.  You supressed a shudder at the thought of how much harder your mission was going to be with this new piece of intel.  Would the agents be just First Order contacts; or as General Hux had hinted, his insurance policy; if you messed this up, would you be completely _removed_? 

“You do realise it is imperative for you to look the part?” He grimaced as he spoke, a barely tracible tremor to his warning, further unsettling you.  You knew that he meant that currently you looked far too well cared for to be a tortured prisoner. Granted there were still the odd bruises here and there, and the practically mended fractures. But whilst those and the replaced dislocations would show on medical scans; they were too old.  They would require you to look broken, especially physically, so what you had wasn’t enough. 

“You need to hurt me again, don’t you?” He nodded in answer and the slow blink caught the sadness and the reluctance he hid from you, as he promised that the medics would carry out the work carefully and under aesthetic.  You would be given painkillers in between to lessen the initial blows and then sedatives during the transfer.  But it was still scary.  You trembled, now visibly frightened and unable to calm yourself at the thought of what was to come.  He was going to do his best to make it comfortable for you, but that was worried you more than anything.  You didn’t want to spend your last days with him, in some drug induced stupor; or with a complete stranger having access to your body.  The more you thought over it, the more it seemed there was only one right way to do it.  You didn’t have much confidence that he would agree; but you would rather it was his hands on you than a stranger. 

“Please Sir.”

You broke contact to raise yourself on to your knees, in front of him, head lowered submissively to him.  You knew Ren claimed that he had sufficiently prepared you mentally that the breaks in memories would make it so that you appeared suitably shattered by torture.  So surely, in the name of the Order, Hux could do his part.  You would go back broken, but at his hands and the marks place on your body his.  To your abject shock though, he declined; almost fearful in his panicked rush to utter his refusal that he was not suited for this.  But you shook your head, the pleads becoming more insistent and letting slip a memory you were not sure if you were supposed to have.

“I know you tortured me when I first came here, I can remember it.  It’s fuzzy, but I know that it was you who did it.”  The confidence in your voice had mostly been feigned; it was something you were almost certain of but not entirely sure. His instant recoil from you, making you wonder if you had it wrong, touching the scar to your inner thigh.  If you weren’t right, if it was just an implanted memory then, where had the scar come from. How was it that you were so certain of its origins?  Hux backed away from you and the bed; leaving not just his room but his entire quarters.

Not a word was spoken to explain what you had done wrong and so now your stomach hung in knots as you hung your head.  Wrapping your arms around you in some attempt at comfort.  You had gone too far this time and you had pushed him away. Either in your haste to have him do a task he clearly thought distasteful; or by revealing a truth you shouldn’t have still had.  Your lip quivered at your carelessness, you had precious little time with him; and now your behaviour with him, had cut it even shorter.  You rolled over, punching at the bed in frustration and screaming into the pillow until your throat was sore.  Willing your breathing to slow down, placing your hand on your chest, to count your measured breaths. Debating if you would break like your voice; if you were as fragile as you felt.

You had almost got your thoughts back under control, when you heard the entrance door open.  A rapid and garbled apology yelled out in your hurry to placate him. Practically running through to the living area, to greet Hux; skidding and deliberately falling onto your knees to beg his forgiveness.  Not daring to let yourself dwell on what would happen, if he would not accept your apology; hoping that it would be enough. Or that if it was not, that he would end you now; rather than further draw out your misery.  

It wasn’t him though and you almost collided with the black mass as he stepped towards you. You sliding back onto your bottom and shuffling away in a struggle to clear some distance.  You apologised, as it crouched next to you adding to yourself that you were not coward, it was perfectly normal to be afraid; especially when the rumours of him were so awful.  Even so, you tried reasoning with yourself, he was on your side; confused then as to why was the fear you felt, slowly being laced through with a stone-cold hatred of him?

“Hux, feels that your reconditioning is slipping.  He thinks I have failed in my endeavours to change you, but I haven’t failed, have I?” You desperately shook your head. Not in an answer or denial of his question, but as a plea against any harm given your confusion at it. Trembling as he came towards you, his hand held out in a claw and the threat of what was to come obvious.  The vocoder made the impassiveness, all the more nerving and you struggled despite him not having laid a hand on you. Fighting against the invisible bonds he placed in your mind; the ones that somehow tethered him to you. Discovering as you chased them, other threads already set in place. Ones that formed blockades against other memories; ones that you could sense that he desperately wanted to follow more so than the thoughts he had chased. 

“It was imperishable, it should have worked!  Little Jedi I will only ask you this once, what did you do to break it?”

You shook your head again, the trembles shaking your body almost as hard as your breath did. You didn’t know; you couldn’t know what had and had not worked; he had arranged it so. Your voice hoarse and fractured with terror, for all you stood and tried to behave with some measure of dignity; of bravery; spitting your words out around your terror.

“I didn’t do anything.”

“DON’T LIE TO ME!”

You were shoved to the floor as much by his voice as the unseen shove with the force. Your knees scraped bloody by the sheer force of his actions. Splutters of his exertion breaking through his mask and then a deep burst of static as he took a calming breath. Crouching down to put two fingers to the side of your face over your left temple. His voice back to its expressionless calm as he warned you not to resist. “This will be much less painful for you if you co-operate. Show me what you have done little jedi.”

It felt like his fingers where scratching inside your head, the rakes more painful than when he had first mind probed you.  He was doing it deliberately to make sure you screamed; and you did, begging him to stop as you rolled in agony, praying that this time you were right.  You honestly had no idea, what you had done, but it was making him angry enough to risk killing you.

“I don’t know; I don’t remember!”

He cocked his head to one side at your second admission, the pain in your head lessening, this reply he seemed to accept.

“Better.”

He stood, giving you time to scramble to your feet, you stood unflinching.  Not even wiping away the tears as you let him rifle through your head, trusting he could find what he needed and that that would be enough to let you go unharmed.  It seemed that like before, some thoughts interested him and those he explored, others he just cast aside.  But one thing was definite though, he could not find what he was looking for; and you still had no idea what you had done.

“This whole mission requires your loyalty, allow me to show you what will happen if you falter; if you fail me, then I will send Adrianna to fetch me Keeva.” He pushed an image into your mind in warning. A scene showing both Adrianna and Keeva bound in chains.  Adrianna watching whilst Ren fucked Keeva both of them screaming at him to stop.  He choked them to silence and repeatedly pressed his sabre against Keeva’s skin. Burning and cauterizing as he cut into nonessential flesh and almost removed body parts; pushing your triplet almost to the point of death.  Allowing her only to rest when they sent her to medics and the bacta tanks to heal. Beginning his next round of torture on Adrianna; only to replace her with Esme when she was spent.  Repeating his actions in a never-ending cycle between them both.  It was so sickening and graphically depicted it made you physically sick.  A memory of a previous conversation a promise he had already broken surfacing as you retched onto the floor. Keeva had always been so gentle and quiet; it was better that she was dead, then him do this to her; it would break her.  The yellow bile that spilled, seemed though to engulf your fury.  But your fear left your words an almost pained whisper, a disappointment to your rage.

“I thought you promised not to hurt us.”

He paused in his force projection and removed his mask.  His face was stone cold and his jaw set; but eyes when they met yours betrayed him.  Something was deeply troubling to him and they echoed that haunted look.  He shook his head, not just refusal at you, you could sense but himself too; how much a hold did the supreme leader hold on him, to push him to this. “No, I promised not to hurt you.  I was only ever permitted one of you.”

The sucker punch of his admission relit your anger. The submissiveness in the truth, giving you the strength to raise your voice to him.

“To be dammed with me! How does hurting the people I love, not hurt me in turn Commander? Am I any different to the other two; or did you make Adrianna the same promise!?”

He didn’t give you a reply, making you wonder if you had struck a nerve. He sat down suddenly weary, shoulders slumped as you made a play for honesty.  Hoping it was the right thing to do, it was all so dammed confusing that you had to be honest, even if it wasn’t what you wanted to do. 

“I’m confused, everything is so mixed up,” You sat down opposite him. “I’m frightened of messing it all up.”

He reached an arm out, almost touching you; but stopping when you flinched away from him. Disgusted that he would even think to touch you, after the brutal scene he had shown you. 

“You don’t have to be, so long as you trust the reconditioning, it will take.  You will perform well enough under either role, the resistance won’t know the difference if you cooperate; only us.”

You still had your doubts as to how the hell could he promise you anything.  He slid down to his knees in front of you, still not touching, but there was something raw, open about the position. It was the first none threatening one he had taken; and designed to put you at ease, the opposite of how you felt.

“How can you be so sure it will not fail?”

You were full of derisive defence, if it all went wrong, then one or both sides would try and kill you.  He was not risking his life, or anyone he cared about; so it was no skin off their backs if it all went tits up.  It mattered not to him what happened, just to your sisters.

“Because, it was your Skywalker who taught me how to do this, all you have to do is believe the right set of memories you need at the time.  It will be enough to get you past, their interrogation; you just have to pick which one to choose.”

You knew you would have to face interrogation at the other end, possibly by Jedi, or from a telepathic member of the Resistance.  His hand slid again against your temple, this time instead of riffling your memories, and thoughts; it was a feeling of calm obedience he pushed at you, trying to relax you. You welcomed yourself into it and the hand slid down to cup your chin, one gigantic finger running under the hollow of your lip.  An errant thought catching you unguarded as the leather rasped against your skin, did no one touch you with their bare hands anymore. Your eyes widening as Ren slipped off one glove and dropped it to the side of you, stroking the backs of his fingers across your cheek. His voice rough with the burr of his closeted thoughts.

“There was a time you when you should have been mine; not his.  But now all that was ever decent between us must be defiled, for the greater good; I cannot look to the past if you will not consider the future.”

There was no time to process his quiet comment; nor his tenderness.  Nothing to protest your refusal, as his hand slipped to pull you by the back of your head to him and catching your mouth with his own.  His lips soft and honest in their gentleness when they met with yours, a strange opposite of all the memories you had of Ren.  This kiss so innocent that it confused you more so than the memories he had shown you, further compacted by his eyes.  He was waiting, you realised. Hoping for something, something you didn’t understand, let alone felt the need to reciprocate.  Instead it just made you angrier at him, cross that he would ignore the professional boundaries set in place by his superiors.  You were not his, you were the Generals.  

“The General, never would have tortured you if he had known who you were; and now he struggles with the guilt that he has broken you.  We’ve all gone too far now; and we can’t any of us turn back, so I suppose in the long run, it no longer matters what you remember, just what you believe.”

There was an infinite amount of guilt in his admission, aimed mainly at yourself; but also at himself on a personal level.  Not for the first time you felt again that he was not so much lying to you, as he was holding something back from you.

“REN!”

 

You hadn’t even registered the door chimes that signalled the arrival of your General, but you were relived beyond measure to have him here now. Your eyes widening at the viciousness of his challenge to the much larger man.  “Get away from her; I will not have you distress her in  _my_  personal quarters.”

The Knight quickly backed away. Standing and pulling on his glove, before not leaving as you had expected; but dragging an unhappy and very ruffled looking Hux to his bedroom.  The door was shut on you, and at loss of anything to do, you curled up onto yourself. Tucking your knees under the shirt to you and listening.  You could hear that they were arguing about you; that was a given since your behaviour today; but other than drifts of indecipherable shouted whispers, you couldn’t work out exactly what was being said. 

Eventually the door flew open; swinging back into its recess as Ren stomped through it. His mask once more replaced to hide his face, again it was an untellable mix of emotions that rolled off him; giving you a sensation of unguided fear, not for himself, but you.  Was it that you were the target of his nervousness; or was it the Generals possible reaction it?  He stopped before you, his mask taking in your subdued seated countenance.  Titling as he pushed forwards the memory of Hux threatening to punish you whilst you lay in the medicentre.

_‘ **Tell him you’re ready.’**_

He was despondent from whatever conversation they had just had, you realised as he quickly shielded himself off from a possible reply from you.  Scowling, you wanted so much to ask him what was meant by all of this; you had all gone too far for what exactly? Jaw relaxing as paused at the door, dropping his shields to push forwards a last reminder to trust what felt right at the time.

_‘Nothing will be as black and white as it seems, remember Hux is not your only protector.’_

He was gone then, in an angry flurry of black and metal. Leaving you far more cross and bewildered by his absence, than you ever had been his presence. 

Hux it seemed was equally as maddened; although he concealed it well by downing a shot of whiskey and ordering you to sit at the table with him. So stoic, that had it not been for your Force-sensitivity and the telepathy your Zeltron side gifted you with; you too wouldn’t have noticed it.  There was a drink placed in your hand, and though it seemed a little early you too took it in one mouthful.  Hux giving you a questioning stare as a chance for you to come clean and talk; something that you simply answered with a shrug.  He wasn’t going to let it go that easily thought, his concern for you evident in his verbal request for you to talk to him. 

“Ren has told you I was worried?” This wasn’t something you wanted to discuss, but there would be only one reason he would press you.

“Yes, and I must admit to being disappointed in you, that you didn’t come to me first.”

You rolled your eyes; he had zero reason to be upset at you.  It had not been your choice to tell either of the men; and his subsequent mistrust of you was making it worse.  Hux should have more sense and believed that if you had wanted to talk; if you had been intending to, then it would have been to him and not Ren.  In fact you laughed at the absurdness of it all. You were about to go on a mission that one way or another could get you killed, and still they bickered over something so pointless as to whom you confided in.

“I didn’t talk to Ren; he chose to rip my concern from my head.”

He really deserved the ire in your voice, it was after all him who had pushed you. Though Ren was equally to blame; he had taken that concern from you without any regard for your personal feelings. Perhaps in some weirdly misguided attempt at him pretending that he was caring of you.  But your attitude too wasn’t helping matters; and Hux must have already been on tenterhooks to snap back so obtrusively.

“That was because you refused to talk to me!”

“I didn’t refuse to talk to anyone, I wasn’t asked.”

“Yes, you were asked Officer. You were asked plenty of times if you were okay; every damned night I asked you!”  Your replies had both gotten louder, both of you having to calm your voices, back to a less deafening tone. Hux pouring himself another tot of whiskey; you instead reaching for the decanter and swigging from that.

“Oh, and you’d just tell the man capable of having you killed, that you weren’t sure where your loyalties lay would you?”

He looked completely aghast at you; this not at all the reaction you were expecting.  Hux was so pragmatic, it didn’t make sense for him to look upset at having to deal with the possibility he may have to assassinate you. 

“The First Order, does not easily put down its assets.”

You closed your eyes and took another drink. So this all you were in the grand scheme of things to him; just an asset.  It made your jaw clench in frustration at him, were you still playing this? 

“You tortured me. There are marks, Sir; I know exactly what you are capable of.”

You pointed to the mark on your thigh, Hux standing from the table and walking around to your side; dropping to his knees before you.  The second time that day you had, one of the most powerful men in the First Order on their knees before you. His fingers grazing the spot next to your femoral artery; your last clear memory, it all making sense.

“This is the only mark from the torture you carry, all else physical, everything that happened in that interrogation room was implanted there by Ren.”

You shook your head, refusing to believe him. You had already failed Adrianna, now your only hope was to get Keeva and hide her was at risk.  Swallowing you carefully kept your disbelief from your voice so that there was no aggression; just a hollow certainty there was more than anyone was letting on. What had Ren had been trying to tell you all along; what else were you missing? The realisation slotting into place like a missing key to a rusty lock.      

“But there was still the sex yes? And this, this isn’t my first round of conditioning is it, General?” There was genuine fear from him as he spoke; and it appeared to have shocked him to silence. The heavy tumbler held halfway to his mouth; but paused in mid-air. It was all still so hazy, but you needed to push through it. You struck at the only option you could see left open to you; the one that would at least earn you his time. "I only have to believe what I want at the time, for the memories to make sense, yes?”

He nodded, dipping his head to join you in staring at the mark on your leg; and you let it all go.  All that you remembered of the First Order, completely replaced by another memory, an older one, one you had discounted all along as false.  It was a memory that you couldn’t quite piece together yet; but coincided with the picture on the older data pad.  You had always assumed it was a new picture, taken at some time under his captivity without your knowledge.  But it wasn’t.  That datapad had been cut off from the software mainframe, it was an older picture than even your time in his custody and one he had sourced and kept.  This wasn’t your first time in the First Order’s custody; nor was it the only time you had been the Generals bed, he hadn’t been lying to you there either.  Without realising you hit him. Not a punch but a woman’s slap; the weeks and weeks of rage recoiling and falling behind a second blow; this one another punch that he didn’t so much as attempt to dodge. He may or may not have tortured you on that table; but what he had done to you in the weeks after; all those lies were far worse.

“You know, this time I really thought that the reconditioning could be reversed.  That you would return your loyalty to the First Order; but its slipped hasn’t it?”

His voice was level and measured; chased by the last of the whiskey in his class so that he could lean forwards and pinch your jaw. Holding it there in his hand and studying you intently, eyes searching.  Your lip cured to a sneer at him, a promise; no a taunt that you now made in anger, weakly lying to yourself.

“I have never, been, yours.”

“Yes you bloody well are!”

The shock of it stunned you and without warning he leap to pinned you; toppling you from your chair; a dark mark joining the split already marking his lip.  His hand at your shoulder the other around your neck as he glared down at you. Fire and fury all that probably held him back from the sensible thought that he should end you.

It was better this way you decided, better that he kill you.  The press of that broken flesh to your lips, so unexpected, that it took you a moment to realise you were kissing him back.  Tasting both his blood and the tang of broken skin; permitting yourself to cling tightly onto him as you realised what it all meant.

“You’re not going to kill me?

“No Kitten, I always thought it was a silly plan,” His lashes fluttered, the long pale hair dusting his cheeks; before he steadied himself to look back at you. His surrender as potent as his anger had always been to you.  “I have always preferred you like this, Ren wanted you far too obedient.”

This time your reply was a whisper, to his gently stroking hands. The anger replaced by quiet certainty. "I really have been here before, haven't I?"

Again he nodded at you. The general so calm and collect in the face of a possible failure that your heart broke anew for him.  Realising the need for his deception; why he had lied to you for so long. “You knew that I would be compromised from the start. But not as much as you are, isn’t that right?”

It; no, you were a weakness to him.  One that he had indulged in to get you to play ball, to bind your allegiance to him, but it had failed catastrophically for him.  Despite the appearances; despite his treatment of you, he as equally yours as you were his; and it scared him. He knew how anathema it was to accept that for you, he would question his own binding devotion to the First Order.  It was all too easy for you to flip him to his back, in this you believed whole heartedly.  But common sense and training overrode your sentiment.  Questioning his devotion was not the same as acting on it.  This was your enemy; you should kill him, not want him, your entire body screaming for you to do it; to take him.  Your eyes darkening and growing unfocused as your hand pressed instead to his throat. Tilting your head as beneath you he gasped, finally too aroused to hide it from you. His cock swollen against his trousers and pressing into you, where you straddled him.  In this you were beyond confident; certain although your reply almost sounded the opposite.  The heartless murmur you attempted coming out at a pledge of allegiance to him.

“I’m as much yours General then, as you are mine.” He pressed against your hand; choking himself as he pulled himself up into a seated position. His fingers tangling to pull at your hair painfully yanking your neck to a side and mouth open you panted, permitting him to manhandle you.  A deep, shuddering breath, relaxing you into his hold.  Ren was far more perspective than you had ever given him credit for, he had seen Hux slipping well before you, and he thought he would use it to his advantage. The First Order wanted that list, you needed to protect your sister; but above all you needed to get out.

“Am I right, sir?”

His reply was a barely perceptible nod. The tickle of his hair against your neck, before he drove his teeth into it making you grind yourself against him.  Yes, there was far more than you could recall between you both; it had always been there. His attraction to you had always ran deeper than your torture. 

“Yes, my little soldier, you are as perceptive as always. We are each other’s perhaps more than we are our own.” 

You closed your eyes and swallowed; yet it was there in his answer. It had always been there mixed in with his taunting, if only you had just had the sense to have listened to him.  It was all more than snide comments or a pet-names, you had once been exactly that, his soldier.  So the distaste for you had run deeper than you being Resistance; somehow you had let him down before and he struggled to understand it.  All this time he had fought to keep you safe from Ren; but knowing that one wrong step would give him away.  It was why he had sent you to Ren, a bluff, an attempt to prove even to him you were nothing. Even in that still risking everything; because of sentiment he would not permit himself to admit to.

Ready at last, you climbed off him and slid gracefully to your knees in abeyance before him.  He had protected you for so long; that to refuse this would endanger both of you with longing.  You needed his hand to be the one that guided this next bit, letting a medic do it, would put him at further risk.  There was only one thing you could think of to make him change his mind, you needed him heartless, unfeeling. You needed him to hate you a little while longer; his explanation could wait.

“I am ready for my punishment now Sir.”

 


	16. Double Tap

Now that you understood more it seemed to have changed his outlook to you, and he shook his head pleadingly.  The thought of actually laying hands on you in such a violent way, now too abhorrent to a man who had beaten you bloody when his temper struck. 

“No Kitten.”

That one sentence; begged you not to make him do it. You shook your own head in a refusal to grant him a pardon, disbelieving at his refusal to dirty his own hands.  Your ribs had healed quickly enough, the Bacta treatment aiding you so that currently your body was free of aches and pains; you could take it. 

A shudder of fear ran your spine; chased by excitement. It wasn’t just the pain that worried you, but the heady euphoria it brought.  You for the first time since you had manipulated him the first day in his quarters, initiated contact.  Running a finger along his cheek; your head still lowered.  You couldn’t allow yourself to look at him, too worried now that you’d lose your resolve.  Anger from his fear of disappointment had always the way to manipulate Hux.  It usually took a lot to rile him; but for some reason you had been gifted with the ability to do it effortlessly.

“Why, are you afraid of it?”

 “Of hurting you; yes!”

His voice sounded choked; forced in his disbelief that you kept asking for something he had asked you not to.  This was getting nowhere and so you played the hand left to you; praying to all that was sacred to you he would bite.  You couldn’t allow yourself permission to wonder what would happen if you failed this one. 

“Ren would do it.”

Beneath your fingertips you felt his body stiffen, and the sharp inhalation of his breath as he held himself in check. You were there; but it was nothing to smile about, just one more push and you would have achieved your goal. You dropped your voice, throat clenching at the horror of what it would mean if this went wrong and he called your bluff.

“If you won’t do it Sir, then I will ask him.” 

His breath shuddered through his lungs. Taken in deep gasping lungful’s of oxygen, his jaw gritted with the loss of the fight to remain calm, as he weighed up his options.  Ultimately you both knew that if you really were his; then he had no choice, he knew you had him trapped. To refuse this and be found out would question not only his loyalty to the First Order; but his privileges as your handler.  There was a millisecond of calmness; before he closed his eyes, embracing the anger he had tried so hard to hold back on, each and every syllable a quiet declaration of it.                   

“You manipulative little Bitch!” That snarl was the precursor for his fist swinging to meet your cheek. A deafening crack sounded, and this time you knew by the pattern of pain, that he had broken it.  It hurt, but it was necessary. There was no way that you would be permitted to leave, if anyone else suspected that this had gone wrong somewhere.

“Would you let him fuck you again, as he did it too.” 

You were pulled, twisted and slammed down into the floor.  Spitting out bloodied saliva and running your tongue across the gaps where your molars cut into your cheek. Had you ever before thought you had ever seen him mad, then this proved without a doubt that you had been gravely mistaken.  This Hux was furry personified and it cut through you to know it came from a deeply seated and genuine hurt; but you had your priorities.  There had been a time when you thought you had only wanted to hurt him; to make him suffer.  But now you were beyond and there was only an empty painful feeling at his hurt, when he pinned you down.  Tears pricked the corners of your eyes and these would be the most genuine you had yet to shed; but fearful for that you choked them back.  Too worried now to let up on your manoeuvrings; it was your turn to be callous in this charade you both played to the world.

“Why not, it didn’t seem to matter to you last time.”

You knew that by making him do this to you; you cut him deeper than a knife.  Yes, he was your enemy now; but there had been a time when he clearly was not and he evidently remembered all of that better than you.  You also knew that deep down, in an odd sick way, you knew that, you felt something for him; but whatever had been or could be; this was likely the final nail in that coffin.  You were not stupid; he had left too many clues.  Perhaps he had wanted you to remember, and it ate you both up from the inside that you couldn’t.

There had been a reason you were drawn to him in that nightclub; why of everyone else in there you had blindly chosen him to be your protector. Why you respected him over Ren, despite everything he did to you. Maybe once he had protected you as he had tried to mould you into a loyal subordinate; but now it was all a blur of adrenaline that tightened into a pulse of fear in your groin.  The hand fisting in the hair at the back of your head, dragging loose stands of it to tangle, sticking to his leather clad fingers as he held you in place with it, the spare lifting the long shirt of his you wore, over your ass.  Not caring when the seams on his garment threatened to stretch, literally ripping your knickers from you to leave him with your bare arse.  

His hand was anything but gentle when it connected; nor was he particular as to where it landed. Your back, your bottom, your thighs, even the backs of your arms would all be marked dark a dark red, that would deepen purple in places.  The pain too much, and you sobbing as om instinct you flipped him from you.  Running towards the bedroom; a room that you knew you couldn’t get out of or keep him out of; but where could you hide from him?  It was a stupid idea, there was nowhere in the base that he didn’t have access to. 

“You wanted me to do this to you, so get your arse back here!”

You hadn’t counted on it being so intense though; nor your body’s reaction to be this aggressively willing.  Eyes wide as he grabbed hold of you and tossed you again to the floor, another bruise already forming on your shoulder and hip when they hit the bed frame. 

The look he shot you was so dark, you almost wet yourself in fear when he grabbed your throat.  Smashing the side of your head into the wall and knocking another dark mark into your hip.  You had however counted on his response to be strongly sexual. His cock straining against his trousers and heavy with blood, angry throbbing its demands.  He ignored it completely to pick you up again. This time blessedly throwing you head-first onto the softness of his bed, pressing himself maliciously over your back.   His hands at your hips and then gathering them together; arching your back to him with your wrists.  Holding them in place behind you in one one hand; the other gripping to your bicep. Twisting you and wrenching that shoulder painfully from your socket.  Your vision swam as you saw nothing but the white-hot blanket of agony and screamed rolling onto your stomach.  Almost dislocating both your elbows too as you jerked away, trying to free yourself of his grip, to cradle your arm.  There was no reprieve for you though; just Hux pulling it out and up; then with a twist pushing it painfully back into place. His face almost passive as he watched you gasp a broken sob; devouring your fear and pressing his fingers into socket around it.  The rest of his body easily belaying the lie his face tried to speak.  

You screamed again, rolling forwards for a brief reprieve; but refusing to let the tears slip from your eyes, as he rested a knee to the back of your waist and hunted in a draw.  It didn’t take him long to source what he was looking for.  His belongings kept impeccably sorted, holding forth a pair of binders. 

There was a hairs breath of a pause and something akin to confusion passed over his features before he gripped first your tender arm; using the pain it elicited, to easily coerce you into the position he wanted.  Your wrist guided to the wall and Hux fastening the retainers he had produced around your both your waiting wrists.  Magnetizing them to shackle you to the metal above his bedframe. There was the ripping sound of fabric slitting, and you closed your eyes then.  A sharp blade gently scratching you as the synth-cloth gave beneath it to reveal you naked flesh. 

You expected next to feel the sting of a knife then; but instead he unfastened his belt. Making a show of sliding loose from his trousers; and taunting you with slow strokes of it over your tender body. Shoving your face into the pillow and holding your face there to muffle your screams, as the leather strap bit painfully into your flesh. General Hux not seeming to care if the buckle hit you or the leather; your skin splitting from the force of his blows.  You screamed until you were unable to make a whimper, the belt landing excruciatingly against your breasts and the softer skin of your belly and hips; before he flipped you over, to continue his assault on your back. 

You were a mess, but he wasn’t done.  There had to be weeks’ worth of injuries, no one could suspect he had gone soft on you. Worse there was an evident wetness between your legs, and your face twisted together in a grimace of shame, as he noticed it. His smirk at your reaction as plain as his dilated pupils and the bulge at his pants. 

“Is this what you wanted my little slut?”  

He twisted a nipple, the first obvious sexual action he made in a session not by your design as overtly sexual as this would become. The captured tears finally fell, in rivulets across your cheeks, a horrible burning sensation of shame hit your throat.  Making it difficult to speak, strangling your words; there was still more to this, more than he was telling you.  But could barely manage even your nod.  At least there would be some pleasure for you out of all of this, humiliating pain.  You rolled over to kneel when released and ordered to do so, happy to hide your shame filled face in your hair. Your voice a strangled cry far more emotional than you needed it to be.   

 “I am not your, slut, your soldier, not your anything.”

“Perhaps not now; but you were Kitten.”

His own voice was dangerously close to cracking, his fingers trailing the scar on your leg. “Should I leave you with another reminder, one even their blocks will not let you escape?”

The mattress dipped as he moved, booted footsteps inched away, leaving you just long enough to panic. He returned without his jacket; just his undershirt and gloves, brandishing the monomolecular dagger that he used to cut away the shirt you’d worn.  It pressed against you, running the length of your spine, as he hummed to himself. Straddling your lower back and pushing your chest back to the mattress. 

He hadn’t cut deep enough to leave a permanent mark yet, but when he pressed it against the back of your neck he did, dragging it across between your shoulders in a complicated pattern of straight lines. Groaning with the effort it took to push your forehead into the bed when you fought him. His branding of you leaving you truly terrified for what he could be doing to you. 

“You know, I may be compromised, but I at least I was never a traitor to the Order.  I will do just as we planned then; we will return you to your beloved Resistance to deliver your message, and you will do just as I desire once there.” 

You struggled beneath him, frightened for what came next; you really had unleashed a dangerous monster.  Far scarier when handed emotions he couldn’t deal with than Ren; who seemingly dealt with his demons on a daily basis.  The hate was evident in his voice as you struggled with yourself to process, what he had said.

“It is fitting that you do so with your own true symbol carved into your skin, marking you as the Traitor you are.” Your voice was riddled with disbelief and absolute contempt for him.  You were not able; nor willing to accept his statement.  Was he so entwined with his devotion to the First Order, that he saw your inability to defect as a personal issue? “I am no traitor!”

 “What ID:07; are we not sharing other people’s guilty secrets right now; just mine?”

You could almost hear the pleased smirk in his voice as he delivered his killing blow and you went lax beneath him. Catatonic with the shock that hit your entire body like a punch. The possibility of truth in it, leaving you gasping. Your body far more winded than if he had delivered an actual blow to it.  Your mind and belly were in knots; and it hurt more than his physical blows to even try to comprehend what he was saying.  Was this why Ren’s conditioning had failed; because the resistance had hid more than just your mission details from you?

You gave a renewed struggle, a frenzied fight against him turning your face to look him in the eye.  His hand circling your throat from behind and making you unable to plead with anything else but your eyes as they bore into the pillow beneath you.  The masochist wanted to see the hurt in your eyes, the nauseated confusion.  

“That’s impossible, I have never been.”

He allowed you to deny him this once; but he didn’t allow you to finish you protest. Cutting you off with a smirk that left you frozen.  Was it just your threat to put yourself alone with Ren that worried him, or another pain that goaded him to this strength of reaction; why was he choosing now to give you the truth? You still hadn’t recovered from his first phantom punch; however, your strength was returning with every painful truth he gifted to you.

“You whored yourself out for the Resistance! Face it they have kept you as much in the dark as we did!”

It was we when it suited him, was it.  Rarely a him, rarely a you and always the Order; the enemy.  You steeled yourself, unable to sat that you were happy now that in his anger he kept nothing hidden from you; that his caring had all been a ruse. 

 “Why the fuck, are you telling me all of this now?”

“Because it doesn’t matter anymore, I tried to keep you out of this, to keep you safe; and you still chose them.  You joined our ranks over ten years ago; and you were the perfect soldier, your technical ideas nearly rivalled mine! You were so promising, until he discovered you were Force-sensitive; and I had to send you away from him.  Why do you think they were so damn willing, to use you for this mission!”

You forgot how to breathe; stuttering in choked coughs that made your head hurt all the more savagely as you clutched at your stomach. It was impossible, you had no memory of ever being First Order. Here yes, but you would have been told if you had served under him; warned before you left; fuck you hadn’t even recognised him as your commanding officer; much less someone you knew personally.  Any memory you had of that was gone; drawing up a throbbing pressure in your skull; so why was every sense screaming to you that he wasn’t lying? 

“Why would that make any difference to the Resistance’s choice to use me?”

“Because they knew.”  His lips found your mark, his tongue running over the pattern of throbbing flesh.  Scalding hot tears of his own splattering onto you and branding you anew. The salt setting off a new wave of pain in it that grounded you to the now.  You expected more, as his fingers dug painfully into your arms, despite their shortness; his nails biting into your skin.  Keeping you in place as he lay his head to your spine, his swollen lips placing more kisses into your skin.  You had to know; but couldn’t bring yourself to ask; you supposed realistically you already knew the answer and was not sure if you could cope with it. That uniform had fitted you too well, it had once been yours and for some reason he had kept it; sentiment.  You opened your mouth to see if he would give you the explanation you needed, winded again by his whispered confession. “They knew that I loved you.”

Hot and cold prickles ran your skin, somehow you remembered to breathe through this.  There was enough slack in his grip for you to turn over.  Your wrists twisted painfully where they stayed in their restraints; but you needed to see.  You already believed him, but you still needed to look at him.  He didn’t stop you from flipping over, but for the first time ever he was vulnerable; he couldn’t look at you when you did. Ginger lashes darkened by tears and lowered to his cheeks.  You ran your eyes over him; and he looked for the first time ever dishevelled, his hair was a glorious mess of fire. But when you looked closer his downcast eyes looked painfully broken, dejected; like you had just ripped the gifted secret from him.  So was this the real reason for his revulsion of you?  So much had made sense with his admission. His disgust at when Ren had fucked you, had never been at you; it had been internalised. It was him he blamed for not being able to stop him.  All along he had kept this secret, not just from you but from the First Order; did Ren even know?

“Ren was the one I hid you from; he wanted you before for his  _grand-plan_. I sent you away from him once; and you were not supposed to have come back, let alone changed and no longer mine.” His words were choked with tears and finally he looked up to you.  The tears gathering crystal droplets in his lashes and his eyes red rimmed.  You had betrayed his trust twice, once by returning, the other by returning for the enemy.

 

“They changed your face and somehow it altered your Force-Signature. Neither of us knew you, until Ren found you out; and by then it was too late, I couldn’t risk letting him know.”

This was the second time this man had cried over you, only this time there was only tenderness when he put another silver cuff around you.  This time a simple collar.  It was designed to be functional, but had you have had clothes, easily hidden. And it hung heavily against your skin and heart, resting just above the cuts to your neck. “It’s fitting that I send you back in this too; since by rights it belongs to you.” He pulled the collar back tight to your neck, thinking to himself as he did. Lazily offering you a bargain, as you struggled to breath as it tightened. “I will unfasten you from the cuffs; but you will not try to run, I will use your chip if you do, understood?” You would have nodded if you could, instead you gasped for breath. Mouthing desperate yeses to him, praying as the room swayed, that he would let you have air.

He was too full of concern when you came back around, you blinked struggling to swallow past your swollen throat. Your wrists now loose at your side; but the heavy collar still in place.  You could breathe now and your wrists throbbed painfully and you realised that in your struggled to breath you had broken through the skin on them.  His naked fingers touched them, inexplicably tender after the pain they had wrought to everywhere else.

“I need to know everything.” He nodded to your question and you realised that whilst he thought knocking you out had claimed his calmness back meant; it did not mean that he had regained his control.  The wounded look he kept hidden behind his eyes betraying it for the exhaustion you knew coursed his system.  His hurt was so tangible you could almost taste it, and as his fingers acknowledged each mark that he had gifted you with and your shudders were not just in fear.  He had caught that, and now you had to second guess who was in charge as his lips parted, in wonder.

“I can’t tell you everything, some is up to your Resistance to tell you, but you didn’t come here a spy the first time; you worked with me on weapons and ship designs.” You nodded, waiting patiently for him to continue his story.  His mouth tensed upwards in the corner, a protection against the pain as he told you everything he could.  You had joined willingly as an enlisted officer, somehow Ren had encountered you for the first time when you returned with information on a project.  Hux had sent you away then; as far from the First Order as he could send you. “He knew you were Force-sensitive; and as I had always suspected it, I had kept you from him and Snoke. But I couldn’t protect you anymore once he discovered you. I sent you away from him once; this time will be harder and more costly, but I will do it again.”

So the General had always done his best to keep you from Ren; and somehow you had repaid him by becoming loyal to the enemy.  Had it been honest allegiance, or had Ren manipulated you that time?  Either way Hux had insisted you were sent back, and they had kept you all this time.  Their leaders sending you on this mission in the precept hope, that if you were caught, Hux would keep you alive for them.

“You said we have been intimate, did you that we have had sex?” He nodded, at your shy murmur, his fingers brushing your collar.  He had wanted to take you again the moment he had realised it was you, he explained. But had had to keep quiet; there had been intimacy in his actions; but he thought it wrong to push for sex.  The pair of you behaving even then with some of the same closeness and protectiveness of a couple, but never any sex.  You knew what you wanted and at your sigh his eyes softened, realising before you asked what you wanted.

“I want to, please.”

He looked bewildered; not daring to appear pleased yet.  He kept his voice level, as reasonable as he could, giving you room to back out. “After everything I have done to you, you want me?”

Any doubts you had at his question dissipated when you slowly nodded. Blushing as he looked down at you in fascinated wonder.  His lips parted and he allowed you to dab your fingertip gently along the spit to his lower lip.  Then your fingers traced the scar you had graced him with, making you hold a shaky breath when instead of rebuking you he caught your hand and kissed your fingertips.

“We both of us, carry our marks well.”

You frowned, the words you would have chosen to add dying on your lips, as he dipped his head.  Time stood still at the press of his lips to yours and you opened your mouth to him, allowing him to take control of your body.  Your arm wrapped his neck and he pulled you onto his lap, wrapping his arms around you; as you wrapped your legs around his waist.  You were wetter than you had a right to be and as he deepened the kiss you spread your legs to welcome him between them.

Fingertips touched your collar, stroking up your chin and oh so gently, cupping your face in his hands as he kissed you.  It was all so restrained though, his touches too gentle; this would not get you off.

“I’m not made of glass General; you can touch me.” He was hesitant at first to touch even where he had not hurt, and that was few and far between. Eventually you dragged one hand to a bruise at your shoulder and pushing it down into the darkened mark. Your eyes glassy and panting until he pressed against one of his own evolutions, and you whined.  At first he drew back afraid to have hurt you; then the dark look of utter lust you shot had him stilling in his attempts, instead brushing against an open slit to your skin.  Enamoured by the noises you made, his fingers expertly ran your arms, dipping fingertips to press into the cuts and bruises, each press the correct pressure and length of time to leave you gasping.  He gave a serious chuckle, when one close to your nipple had you mewling into his mouth. Your lips struggling to keep up with the rhythm of his own.

“Always were a little masochist, weren’t you?” He still gave you no time to speak. So, instead your answer was a hummed agreement into his mouth, pushing yourself into the body pressing you to the bed beneath you; whilst he rutted against you. His lips never leaving your body any longer, then it took them to move to their next chosen location.  Each pass of them an unspoken apology for everything he put you through, each mark he had made in resentment.  You sighed into him, wrapping your legs around his slim waist, grinding yourself against any part of him you could reach.  Your hands sought out the hem of his jacket pulling it from his trousers, reaching for the fastenings at the front. 

“Hold on.”  His hands pinned your newly freed wrists to the bed besides your head, and you gave a panicked moan; too worried that he would again fasten your wrists again to prevent you from touching him.  He didn’t.  Giving you instead a stern command to hold them exactly where he placed them; and leaving you this time, only your will power to stay bound.  He let go to slowly divest himself of all his layers of clothing, tossing them aside in his hurry.

Naked he was still a beautiful and dishevelled mess. His skin flushed from exertion and the effect your writhing beneath him was having.  Chest bared and pink across his collar bone with blood as he pressed it to your naked breasts.  Kissing both nipples in succession, whilst he lifted his hips and desperately kicked off his trousers.  His hair was tangled more so in his rush; and this the only time you could remember having seen it permitted to remain tussled for so long. Tutting to him, as he absent mindedly reached up to nervously tug at it to flatten and straighten it; until you finally gave into the temptation to touch it. Running your fingers haphazardly through his ginger tresses to bring his mouth back down to yours. Groaning into each other’s mouths when your lips met again. Unwilling to let him break off his kiss; even to breathe properly. Never had anything so wrong tasted, or felt so right, you realised; huffing through your noses and whining when his nails raked the sides of your thighs.

He finally dismissed your demands for kisses.  Flipped you over to pull you flush into the semicircle of his chest. His arms wrapping your waist to pull you closer against his heated flesh.  You sucked on the fingers he presented to you, lathing your tongue between the delicate digits, whilst his own mouth sucked rosettes into your neck. Gifting each unblemished spot with a mark still borne of passion, but no longer in anger.

His cock was hard; yet velvety soft; heavy and filled with blood when at last he allowed you to take hold of it. His mewls almost sobs as you mesmerised each pass of it, determined not to lose this memory.  His fingers reaching around your hip; to rub against the dripping wetness. Sharp teeth nibbling at your ear, your shoulder, your neck; anywhere he could reach as you leaned back into his chest and enjoyed how his body enveloped you. 

You shuddered as his fingers cupped the softness of your hardened clit, and he rubbed gentle circles into it.  Each pass of his fingers a different pattern; designed to bring you pleasure but not completion. Not until it seemed, that you were a babbling mess and he finally bent you forwards, to fuck you. Sliding his cock torturously slowly inside of you and laying over your back, stroking lazy patterns around his cuts with his nails.  His shaft completely buried inside of your slick cunt; and his hips stilled.  He took several steadying breaths before snapping his hips suddenly back and giving his first thrust a delicious edge of pain when his hips hit back to your ass cheeks. 

“Harder!” You gasped your order. Wanting; no needing him much deeper. Perhaps impossibly so, and on the next thrust he roughly shoved your shoulders down into the bed, pulling your arms flat; but careful of your shoulder, to arch your back, up at him. It thrust your pussy further up, and you spread your legs wider for him. Arching your hips further up for him and granting him the final length that made all the difference; his cock pressing to your cervix on every thrust.  His fingers digging deeper into your shoulder blades, the nail marks stinging deliciously when he moved to bring one palm to your ass in a loud slap.

It should have hurt more than it did, yet each slap made you wetter, your moans louder.  Your ass was glowing red when he was done; and his hand dropped to mirror the one at your other hip.  His thrusts so powerfully driven, so feral, that all you could do was lay there and take them. No longer able to keep up with them, all conscious thought gone; you were close, so very close; and so was he. 

You gave a little whine and shuddered whilst you tried snaking your hand between the bed and your stomach to rub at your clit.  Slapped neatly away by General Hux, who ordered it back to the bed; ignoring your pouted plea that you were close.  You bit your lip at the haughty look he shot you in answer, a single manicured brow raised in warning.  Somehow even untidy, hair tousled, breathless and sweat soaked he still looked completely in control; making your cunt clamp down on him, releasing another wave of slick in a pre-orgasm tremor.  You thought for a moment he would make you beg, and took a breath to do so, shocked when he tossed you off him, flipping you over and onto your back.

He entered you again, leaning on his forearms, hooking one leg over his shoulders and his lips dropping to tongue your nipple, as he slowly sped up again.  This position ground your swollen clit against his pelvis, and when his fingers finally dropped to touch you there; it took only a couple of flicks over it; before you were finally screaming his name as you gushed around him.  The sight of you coming undone; his own undoing.  His hips stuttered a breathless cry hissed through his gritted teeth.

He was careful not to crush you, or to upset any injuries as he lay over you.  Resting on his arms, but he steadfastly refusing to remove himself from you.  Pulling the coverlet over the pair of you and stroking hair from your flushed face as you lay limbs entwined together. 

“There needs to be more injuries.”

You nodded wincing where the sheets clung to the various fluids coating your body; he was completely right.  You still looked too healthy to have spent weeks being tortured.  What had been a moment of tenderness, was fast fading under his threat; he had already declined to hurt you. Yes, he had done this once in anger; but he wasn’t going to fall for that again. Nor would he permit you to manipulate him into a position to do so again.  You swallowed thickly at the remorse and trying not to let your anger and disappointment ruin, what had until now been almost a perfect moment. 

 “I will do the see to the rest of the damage for you.  But you do it under sedation; and in return at night you can still sleep here, with me until you go.”  He gripped your chin to speak to you, making you look at him to as much to see what it cost him to demonstrate this gift; as to watch your reaction.  Sighing in relief when you nodded.  The small smile of relief tinging both your sets of lips.  This seemed to be an aphrodisiac for him, the cock inside you stiffening once more and fluttering.  His hips this time slow and steady, but no less punishing as he stroked it to hardness inside the walls of your pussy and took you again.

 

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to head up anything I have still missed, and to offer any help. This one was perhaps above my skill/confidence levels last time I posted it. However I'm still nervous about its reception, given a rude comment the first time around (which was just rude, not at all constructively so)


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